I hear the term "I don't know what anything means" thrown around quite a bit. It leads to this idea that we're meant to 'not know anything' in order to wake up.

I was just reading in the Text last night, Jesus was talking about power. He said knowledge is power, and here he is talking about real knowledge - knowing, direct experience of truth/God, which occurs in Spirit. He spoke of how we still have the power of God but we've denied it and covered it up with all of the things we've taught ourselves (of the ego).

And in that context alone, He goes on to explain that we need to admit that the things we have taught ourselves are not really knowledge - they are things of the ego, and in that sense what we think we know is not really knowing... and so what we think we know, we don't actually KNOW, we just justify and rationalize that it's truth.

We need to let go of THAT.... but, we're only letting go of that ego education so that we can reveal to ourselves the power of God/true knowledge, which we DO know and can know. We need to get back in touch with the power of God (knowledge), and we need to become aware of what we really DO know. It's still in us, just hidden by false knowledge.

The things I think I know, I do not really know, and are not really knowledge. I need to let those go and not depend on them. Then I can become aware again of the presence of real knowledge with God (awareness of love's presence).

Forgiveness is a constant state of knowing there is nothing to forgive. God is "forgiving" but only in the sense that He knows there is nothing to forgive. Forgiveness is more of a sustaining of the truth, an extension of love and a clarity about what is true.

If you have a forgiving attitude it means you overlook errors because you do not make them and recognize they do not exist. You are forgiving because by looking with forgiveness you shine a kind and gentle light on all that you see, acknowledging its innocence and yours.

It's when you fail to be forgiving that you enter into making illusions, perceiving guilt, and are calling for punishment.

God's attitude is that you are always innocent. Holy Spirit's attitude is the same. Holy Spirit is always forgiving. If there is anything you think you've done wrong, it is forgivable. Forgiveness extends from unconditional love and recognizes you have not really done anything at all. That is why forgiveness is a key part of the atonement principle - there is nothing to forgive because nothing has happened.

When we do fail to be forgiving, we enter into a state of judgement in an attempt to explain why we are not forgiving. If I can judge another and condemn them, this is my attempt to explain that I did not forgive because clearly the other person is in error and this calls for me to righteously judge them.

"He who would not forgive must judge to justify his failure to forgive." - ACIM

What I need to then do is stop and recognize that I am not being forgiving, and that I need to get back to a forgiving, overlooking attitude, which recognizes innocence and acknowledges the atonement. This doesn't necessarily refer to the `process` that we seem to go through to get TO a forgiving state of mind. When we're in the forgiving state of mind - Holy Spirit - all is forgiven already. But if I'm in a state of condemnation, I need help to get my mind to stop this and to resume forgiveness.

We call it forgiveness when we undo these illusions and when we work on correction of thought and adjustment of perception. But such corrections are only there for the sake of getting mind back to a state of constant pure permanent forgiveness. Forgiveness isn't therefore something you 'do' its a way of being in love. The curriculum of returning to a forgiving attitude is just that, an illusory path of corrections of the mistakes that we're making in our forgiveness.

Some call it practice - to practice forgiveness, in order to learn what forgiveness really is. Or moreso, to unlearn what forgiveness is not. But it isn't practice that produces forgiveness - the light of truth is already established by God and it is His unconditional love that is constantly forgiving through us. We share in that. Our so called 'application' of ACIM principles is more to do with undoing the ways in which we have failed at forgiveness, removing blocks to the awareness that all is forgiven already, so that we can be restored to a constant state of pure forgiving.

Once we reach that complete awareness of forgiveness, and join with Holy Spirit fully, we will cease to make errors such as judgements and will recognize there is nothing left 'to forgive' because forgiveness is complete. And this forgiveness is a protection because it pro-actively fore-gives in order not to enter into error of judgement. So long as you stick with Holy Spirit and see as He sees, you're good to go.

All is forgiven because nothing has happened to assail the Kingdom of God and nothing ever will. This is good news.

It is not possible to PERCEIVE **within** reality, because there is no perception WITHIN reality. Perception is an interpretative process based on judgement. You can evaluate reality and PERCEIVE it, but this isn't the SAME as knowing it or DIRECTLY experiencing it.

"Only your vision can convey to you what YOU can see. It reaches you directly, without a need to be interpreted to you."

Perception ends before you enter the Kingdom, this does not mean that you cannot SEE in some manner WITHIN the Kingdom.

"Only the mind CAN SEE."

In fact, after an extensive search, I found a great deal of evidence in ACIM that mind in fact DOES have a permanent ability to see. And that even God can see. This seeing does not use PERCEPTION, however. It uses cognition, recognition, and knowledge.

It is possible to KNOW reality, and to RE-COGNIZE God and your brothers. This knowing is a DIRECT experience of what IS THERE. You KNOW it, in awareness. This may well not entail BODIES, but you are SPIRIT, and spirit can be known and SEEN. The son of God can also be seen. YOU are a perfect shaft of light, which can be seen. The great rays can also be seen and they stretch to infinity.

Perception is a way of seeing based on JUDGING or EVALUATING what is there. It is interpretative. Beyond perception, WITHOUT judgement or interpretation, you can directly KNOW what is there. This knowing isn't just some fact or piece of information of non-visual experience. You can SEE GOD and His Creation - the universe of love. Knowing is UNDERNEATH perception and provides direct awareness of reality.

I will present below only a small segment of all the quotes I found. These ones speak more directly to seeing in God, seeing God, seeing His Son, God's ability to see, beyond perception, and beyond vision.

"Perception can reach everywhere under His guidance."

"Perception changes, made to take the place of changeless knowledge. Yet is truth unchanged. It cannot be perceived, but only known." (does not mean it cannot be SEEN!)

"To perceive the truth is not the same as knowing it."

"The innocence of God is the true state of ***the mind of His Son.*** ***In this state, man's mind DOES see God***, and because ***he sees Him as he Is***"

"God knows His Children with perfect certainty. He Created them by knowing them. ***He recognizes them*** perfectly."

"Blessed are the pure in heart for ***they shall see God***" is another way of saying the same thing. Only ***the innocent CAN see God.***"

"The soul never leaves ***the sight of God***"

"ONLY what God creates, or what man creates with the same will, ***has any real existence***. ***This, then, is all that the innocent can see.***"

"The wish to see calls down the grace of God upon your eyes, and brings the gift of light that makes sight possible. ***Will you behold your brother? God is glad to have you look on him.***"

"***See His creations as His Son***, for yours were created in honor of Him. The universe of love does not stop because you do not see it, nor have your closed eyes lost the ability to see. ***Look upon the glory of His creation***, and you will learn what God has kept for you."

"***You will see that God Himself*** is where his body is. Before this light the body disappears"

"***God is in everything I see*** because God is in my mind."

"***God is the light in which I see.***"

"***You cannot see apart from God*** because you cannot be apart from God."

"When you ***look upon knowledge***, all judgment is automatically suspended, and this is the process that enables ***recognition to REPLACE perception.***"

"Judgment is the process on which perception but not ***cognition*** rests." ... "It is ***perfectly possible to look on reality without judgment***, and merely ***KNOW it is there*** By knowing this, you are not doubting its reality at all."

"The innocent see safety, and ***the pure see God within His Son***, and look unto the Son to lead them to the Father."

"Perception is impossible WITHOUT a belief in "more" and "less." Unless perception, at every level, involves selectivity, it is incapable of organization. In all types of perception, there is a continual process of accepting and rejecting, of organizing and reorganizing, and of shifting and changing focus. Evaluation is an essential aspect of perception, because a judgment MUST be made for selection. "Lack of lack" is a concept which is meaningless to a perceiver, because the ability to perceive at all RESTS ON lack."

"What happens to perceptions if there ARE no judgments, and there is nothing BUT perfect equality? Perception is automatically useless. Truth can only be KNOWN."

"Only perception involves partial awareness. Knowledge transcends ALL of the laws which govern perception. Partial KNOWLEDGE is impossible."

"Since perception rests on lack, those who perceive have not totally accepted the Atonement and given over themselves to truth. Perception IS a separated state, and the perceiver DOES need healing."

"In electing the ability to perceive instead of the will to know, man placed himself in a position where he could resemble his Father ONLY by perceiving miraculously. But he lost the knowledge that he HIMSELF is a miracle."

"Unless perception rests on some knowing basis, it is so unstable that it doesn't mean anything. Knowing is not open to interpretation, because its meaning is its own. It is possible to interpret meaning, but this is always open to error because it involves the perception of meaning. "

"To perceive the truth is not the same as knowing it."

"Perception is fundamentally unstable."

"The one correction possible for false perception must be true perception. It will not endure."

"Gone is perception, false and true alike."

"Perception is temporary. It is an attribute of the space-time belief, and is therefore subject to fear or love."

"Misperception produces fear, and true perception produces love. NEITHER produces certainty because all perception varies. That is why it is NOT knowledge."

"The miracle is a way of PERCEIVING, not a way of knowing. It is the right answer to a question, but you do not ask questions at all when you know."

"Since perceptions CHANGE, their dependence on time is obvious. They are subject to transitory states, and this implies variability by definition."

"The fact that perception is involved at all removes the experience from the realm of knowledge."

"Perception involves the body even in its most spiritualized form."

"Knowledge preceded both perception and time, and will also ultimately replace (or correct for) them."

"For the mind that knows this unequivocally, knows also that it dwells in eternity, and utilizes no perception at all."

"Perception, at its loftiest, is NEVER complete. Even the perception of the Holy Spirit, as perfect as perception CAN be, is without meaning in Heaven."

"But no perception, however holy, will last FOREVER."

"God's laws do not obtain directly to a world perception rules, for such a world could not have been created by the Mind to which perception has no meaning."

"Perception rests on choosing; knowledge does not."

I get this feeling that deciding on my own is not the right thing to do, given everything that's said about choosing not to decide, not doing it all on your own, etc. So then I feel torn.

But what I then see is that really, when I am in a state of indecision, fear, doubt, etc I am really not in a state of decisiveness. I probably am trying to decide, but I am not being decisive. And my attempts to decide are really delaying mechanisms to avoid the certainty of decision. In this state, I'm not really making any decisions at all anyway.

Pretty much every time Jesus says "decide", I am in a state of fear and self-doubt. I recognize then that staying in this state is not going to bring about any kind of decision, and if I want to become decisive, I have to get out of the fear.

Sometimes then, I will remark to Jesus that I don't know what to decide, and He will say, "you know". As I pull myself out of the fear and become more dynamic, more certain, more sure of myself, I then automatically feel more decisive and knowing and sure of what it is that I will do.

Then I have to even put aside this idea that I don't already know - that I even need to decide, and stop for a minute to become aware of what it is that I know already.

If I already know, a decision is not needed. If I already know, then I don't need to even get into the fearful drama of "not knowing" what to do. Then, somewhere deep inside, I tune into what it is that I know, and in this there is an acceptance, a peace and a clarity that makes it much more obvious what to do.

Usually knowing is covered up by all kinds of faffing about, doubting, fearing, drama, control, thinking, etc. None of it is really needed because it's actually all a distraction away from knowing. I can't know what to do when I'm choosing to be in a state of not-knowing. Seems so simple, but easy to get lost in.

As I go forward, and as I embark on new endeavors led by trusting Jesus etc, I find myself coming up against fears and concerns I didn't have to face before. Yet each step of the way He guides me to trust, to know, to put aside fear, and to recognize the ways that I am undermining my own certainty and decisiveness. In other words, learning to claim and work in a more empowered state of confidence.

I am finding that the more I am willing to put aside the dishonest toys of fear and self-sabotage, the more I am growing in confidence and strength and certainty. Also fear is reducing, people are growing ever-more approachable, and procrastination is melting.

This is how we gradually move into action. This is how we get off the fence and become truly helpful. And this is how we let go of the dependency on the ego as our guide as to how we should waste time.

We need to learn to be truly decisive, certain, knowing and trusting, before we might become actually willing to allow God to guide and direct us in all that we do. This somehow is tied into becoming willing to do His Will, and to follow Jesus's direction. But in a partnership of mutual agreement.

HOW DO YOU BE TRULY HELPFUL?

ACIM: "I am here only to be truly helpful.

I am here to represent Him Who sent me.

I do not have to worry about what to say or what to do,

because He Who sent me will direct me.

I am content to be wherever He wishes, knowing He goes there with me.

I will be healed as I let Him teach me to heal."

1. "I am here only to be truly helpful"... ONLY to be truly helpful, meaning I do not have other agenda and am not attempting to let my ego control things. What is truly helpful other than the Will of God, which you share and act upon. You can be truly helpful if you are forgiving, aligned with Holy Spirit. Then you will have the clarity with which to identify a call for love when you see one, knowing that the only truly helpful response to it is love in return.

2. "I am here to represent Him Who sent me."... You are to be a representative of Christ. By representation, that means that you share His authority and power and are able to speak in His name, similar to how the Holy Spirit is a devoted Voice for God. You can speak on His behalf, or rather, have Him speak through you. He will inspire you and move you and you will be a conduit for His expression of loving miracles.

3. "I do not have to worry about what to say or what to do, because He Who sent me will direct me"... And so by aligning your mind with His, the two become One, His thoughts become your thoughts, and His perspective becomes your perspective. He will either speak directly through your body or will inspire you supernaturally what to say. You need not worry because you are trusting Him 100% to guide you and He knows the way and what to do. You let Him decide everything for you and are glad to extend God's love.

4. "I am content to be wherever He wishes, knowing He goes there with me."... Truly committed and trusting Holy Spirit, you would have no basis for fear and would be in supreme confidence, relaxed, empowered and certain. He will orchestrate all events and encounters and send the appropriate people to you or you to them. Knowing that He goes there with you, and in awareness of His presence, gives you no reason for fear. This means you have developed trust and depend on God for everything. Having surrendered your personal agenda, you are content to do your Father's business.

5. "I will be healed as I let Him teach me to heal"... miracles are for you and for everyone. You will heal (yourself) and heal others at the same time. Healing means resurrection. It means restoration and correction. It means the blessing of forgiveness. And it means the demonstration of God's truth. As you allow Him to teach you and work through you, you will learn what healing is and you will experience it yourself. As you heal yourself, you become able to heal others. It is the privilege of the forgive to forgive and the healed to heal. Accepting miracles for yourself gives you the willingness to provide them to others.

Sometimes (ok, often), I think I know what is good or bad. For myself, for other people etc. But I have to question this. Do I really know anything?

What if my efforts to help are hurtful? What if I'm distracting someone from a spiritual lesson? What if I'm taking away someone's lesson, even if it's painful, that they need in order to wake up? What if my fixing is actually undoing an opportunity that someone has to find their own strength? What if my attempt to take over something is disempowering for them, even if it was with the intention of helping?

Ultimately then it comes down to just... allowing oneself to open up to the idea that I do not know ANYTHING as to whether something is right, or wrong, for myself or anyone.

The Course asks us to be open to 'not knowing', as a doorway to knowing. What I see it as now, is that when we're constantly in this tug of war of seeing something as right or wrong, we automatically then leap off that springboard into ego reactions and coping tools and ways of 'doing something about it', all of which is based on us thinking that we KNOW... believing that we KNOW what is going on or why it's happening, when we actually don't.

What the Course is warning us against is FALSE knowing, which is ego knowing - and the ego actually cannot know anything. False knowing is where you believe you know, you have some opinion, you judge it, you label it, you decide something is right and okay, or something is bad and not meant to be this way, and then you proceed to pile extra reactions on top of this. You even make decisions about what to 'do about it' based on this. But this basic perception of ... its wrong. .. or ... it shouldn't be like this. .... that's something WE are making up.

I don't know what's right or wrong for people. I don't know even what's right or wrong for myself. I don't know what's helpful or hurtful. I don't know whether my attempts to fix and save and heal and cure are actually interfering with someone's spiritual growth. I could be doing more harm than 'good' in spite of my belief that I'm helping. Or vice versa, I may be holding back on helping in certain ways that would be truly helpful because of a belief that I shouldn't, or don't want to, or can't love a person enough etc.

So it's like, here is this neutral situation, and then the ego will waver off to one side or another, taking sides, either for or against this thing, and basically go off on a tangent of believing that it knows that this diversion away from 'what is' is based in truth.

It takes a tremendous amount of humility, therefore, to admit truly, honestly, that if we really get down to it, I do NOT KNOW what anything means, I do NOT know what anything is for, I do NOT know whether something that's happening is good or bad, I do NOT know if it's meant to be happening and is helpful or whether it should not be happening and is harmful. And maybe helpful/harmful is entirely an ego-made up idea? How about that? What if there was absolutely no good or bad of any kind? What is everything that's happening, no matter whether I love it or hate it, has absolutely nothing to do with my ego's judgements about it? What if I have NO CLUE about it, other than that IT SIMPLY IS WHAT IT IS?

And what is it that I ultimately REACT to? It's my own perception that I've invented that something is wrong with the picture. I am the one deciding that, thinking I know, when I don't know. And then I react to my own conclusion. I don't really know anything, or at least, my ego doesn't really know anything.

But God knows everything. Holy Spirit knows everything. I guess I should trust Him and let Him decide for me?

"Consciousness was the first split that man introduced into himself. He became a PERCEIVER rather than a creator in the true sense."

In ACIM terms, before the separation from God, we simply enjoyed what Jesus calls "awareness". This awareness is tightly tied into oneness and knowledge.

In awareness, you ARE that which you are aware of. There is nothing truly "separate" to observe that isn't already you. Since you ARE that which you are aware of, you have immediate and direct "knowledge" of it. Thus knowledge and awareness and oneness is all tied together.

Awareness also has power and love and creation in it. It can cause by will the creation of extensions to God's kingdom. It extends ITSELF as a co-creator, also extending God, to KNOW that which it creates. Just as God created US through directly KNOWING us.

"God knows His Children with perfect certainty. He Created them by knowing them."

In the separation, we attempted to reject all this. We rejected oneness and introduced separation. This now meant that we wanted something to "come between" ourselves and ourselves. Between us and God. Something which can be different over here than it is over there.

As a result, mind split and now formed what ACIM refers to as "consciousness". It's a separated state. The mind in this state is NOT creative, and does NOT have knowledge. Instead of being causal and powerful and one with everything, it is instead a state relying entirely on maintaining separation.

"Consciousness is correctly identified as the domain of the ego." At the same time of course the sense of identity went from you being the whole, to you being only a part. And now in the egoic consciousness state of mind, the mind became UN-creative (mis-creative) and unwilling to be one with everything.

Mind's rejection of creation and knowledge was kind of like trying to make the mind empty, or to stop broadcasting (creating). So instead of extending and uniting and sharing, it became sort of passive and unwilling.

As a result, mind now regards itself as a sort of RECEIVER of inputs, signals, which come to it from something it regards as NOT part of itself. Not one with itself or known. As such there now develops ideas of space and time, of distance and delay, or separateness between self and brothers and God.

"Perception is a RESULT not a cause."

"Consciousness is thus the level of perception, but NOT of knowledge. Again, to PERCEIVE is NOT to know."

"Consciousness is the level which engages in the world, and is capable of responding to both external and internal impulses. Having no impulses from itself, and being primarily a mechanism for inducing response, it can be very wrong."

The perceiving "consciousness" state has now gone from being a powerful knowing creator-extender that is one with everything, to a disempowered passive state that doesn't know anything and sees everything as separate. Effectively it now sees itself as a victim or at the EFFECT OF things separate from itself.

Signals then enter the conscious mind either from without or within, and from the superconscious (God level) or subconscious (miracle level). Consciousness sort of RECEIVES these signals and thus PERCEIVES what it is TOLD exists. As though something outside of itself is making impressions upon it and giving it signals and telling it that stuff exists.

All of these signals in the perceiving mind are SENSED, in particular by the body. There is now a separation between self and other, so a separation between observer (who has awareness) and the observed. Because of the separation split between these two, it introduces the delay and distance of spacetime.

As such, every single physical object, all matter, space and time themselves, all human bodies, the planet Earth, the sun and moon etc, it's all ONLY a perceptual signal occurring in a state of separation. Separate things, being sensed by a separated mind, in a state in which the mind is not ONE with those things, and in which both the separated things AND the "separate observer" (ego) are illusions.

Both the ego mind (separated self) and the world it perceives (spacetime) depend entirely on maintaining separation and differences in order to maintain the mind split that leads to perception and consciousness. Without this "first split" in the mind, consciousness is not possible, perception is not possible, and separate objects are not possible.

This doesn't mean that the separate objects can be perceived "as one with" the observer. If the two are separate, perception is possible. If the two are one, perception is NOT possible and separation is NOT possible and OBJECTS are not possible. Matter is not possible, space and time are not possible, without a split mind.

"To see a sinless body is impossible."

"Since perception rests on lack, those who perceive have not totally accepted the Atonement and given over themselves to truth. Perception IS a separated state, and the perceiver DOES need healing."

Thus if you are still perceiving, you are NOT knowing. Even true perception is NOT knowledge, not oneness, and not a healed mind. Thus you can seem to wake up to or attain very high states of CONSCIOUSNESS, in which you can perceive the "real world", BUT, this is not the same as the realm of total oneness which is heaven.

"Even the perception of the Holy Spirit, as perfect as perception CAN be, is without meaning in Heaven. Perception can reach EVERYWHERE under His guidance, for the vision of Christ beholds EVERYTHING in light. But no perception, however holy, will last FOREVER."

Waking up WITHIN consciousness, in a perceptual realm, is still a split-minded state of separation. Only when consciousness ENDS, the split is entirely healed, and separateness becomes impossible, does the mind return to TOTAL KNOWLEDGE, oneness, perception is impossible, and space and time are impossible. Without the split of consciousness, there is no world. And the mind must wake up FROM consciousness in order to return to the awareness of reality.

No more dreams, no more material objects with differences, no more bodies and planets, no more observers and observed things. Only a directly known realm of SPIRIT AND LIGHT, created by God to last forever.

"To perceive the truth is not the same as knowing it."

"And now God's KNOWLEDGE, changeless, certain, pure and wholly understandable, enters its Kingdom. Gone is perception, false and true alike. Gone is forgiveness, for its task is done. And gone are bodies in the blazing light upon the altar to the Son of God. God knows it is His Own, as it is his. And here They join, for here the face of Christ has shone away time's final instant, and now is the last perception of the world without a purpose and without a cause. For where God's memory has come at last there is no journey, no belief in sin, no walls, no bodies, and the grim appeal of guilt and death is there snuffed out forever."

"The intrusion of the ability to perceive, which is inherently judgmental, was introduced only after the Separation. No one has been sure of anything since then. You will also remember that I made it very clear that the Resurrection was the return to knowledge, which was accomplished by the union of my will with the Father's."

One of the difficult things about trusting Holy Spirit is the idea of 'showing up' empty handed and not knowing what the heck to do, and yet things still working out 'in the moment'.

Usually our minds are filled with all kinds of predictive, planning thoughts which try to know, beforehand, what needs to be known in order to do whatever it is that needs to be done, at the time. And we won't budge if we don't know what's going to happen first, because we're afraid.

When Holy Spirit asks me to write my book for example, I hesitate with thoughts like "I don't know what to write" or "what will I write about". And then Holy Spirit will keep on reminding/suggesting, "book, book, book". And I will keep on protesting mentally, "what shall I do". What He really wants me to do is to just stop the mental chatter and sit down and start writing AND THEN in the moment, in the flow, in the spontaneous present, HE IS THERE, and He helps me write.

So then it ends up being, I didn't need to know, by myself, what to do beforehand, because by `just doing it` was an invitation to Spirit to join with me in the PRESENT and support me and help me spontaneously and unrehearsed.

Going to do something when you have to put aside all notion of knowing what it is you will do, and all plans, and all sense of "I can only do this IF I know what will do"... its very exposing. It makes me feel empty-handed and blindfolded and clueless. It doesn't exactly support a concept of ego confidence. It's more like, I have to `just do it` anyway with a tremendous call to have COURAGE and FAITH and TRUST.

So when Holy Spirit is urging you to do something, I think we have to remember to trust that He WILL be there in the moment with us and He WILL be helping us and he WILL be working through us. It's like you have to take the leap first AND THEN the wings appear. You act 'as if' you will have all the support in the world and then it shows up.

This is difficult to learn, because I'm so used to ... hah... being in control. Lol, (thanks HS for that insert). So used to being in the drivers seat and relying on prior learning (the past) and thinking (lol) that I can only do anything if it's been premeditated and planned out. This is an ongoing lesson for me and probably for many people, because the ego is basically the thing that comes between surrender/letting go and being too afraid to make a move when you can't yet see the safety net - a safety net that you don't even really NEED when Holy Spirit goes with you. "If you knew Who walks beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would be impossible" - ACIM

The ego doesn't understand how to put trust/faith/spirit first and to expect support from outside of itself. It doesn't know how to let itself be abundantly supported or to be included in a bigger plan not of its own making. Holy Spirit has a plan. But it calls for us to step OUT of our own plan and our own controls - letting go of controlling all outcomes - so that we can step into the spontaneous flow of Spirit directing us and moving through us and healing through us. Which reminds me of this wonderful ACIM quote:

"I am here only to be truly helpful.

I am here to represent Him Who sent me.

I do not have to worry about what to say or what to do,

because He Who sent me will direct me.

I am content to be wherever He wishes, knowing He goes there with me.

I will be healed as I let Him teach me to heal." - ACIM

To just show up, ready, willing, available, to be directed and used by Spirit, with no prior agenda, with perfect willingness and readiness, as an agent of God, without necessarily knowing or needing to know who/what/where/why/how ... that's what I/we need to get to. To go around doing God's will, working miracles, healing people, teaching and inspiring people, being moved by Spirit and supported in 'supernatural' ways. We need to learn to trust in Spirit's support and that, if we leap first, then we will find the power to fly.