God's omnipresence doesn't mean that He is located at each location in SPACE. Space itself is a lie. It's an illusion of separation. It's easy to believe God is some great big huge thing so vast that he covers the whole universe, and so, your little spot on planet Earth is... a hair on his knee.

God isn't like that. It's not that PART of God is in one place, while another PART of God is in another. God defies spacetime.

All of God is over here. And, all of God is over there.

There is no compromise in this. It's not that the parts of God over here can't also be over there. It's not that most of Him is over here, with leftover parts over there. This would be true of objects in this world, but it's not true of God. God is not limited in a finite way.

This is what makes God's nature a little difficult to get your head around, because it defies all laws of space and time, separation of locations, boundaries, limits, etc.

The entire 'personality' of God is over here, in this location, fully present, completely fully located there with no lack or limitation or partiality. And to the ego that means, there is no God left to be anywhere else. But God defies the ego. God is ALSO over there, fully, completely, totally present, ALL of Him is over there, as well as over here. Simultaneously.

God transcends spacetime limits. If you were to think of Him in terms of space, you'd have to imagine an extraordinary warping of space, the likes of which you might only conceive of happening in a wormhole or black hole perhaps, there space itself becomes distorted, or two locations share the same space or overlap.

God's foundation of omnipresence is the root reality behind all things. In the "separation from God", we introduced the idea that SOME of what was "over here" was perhaps "not over there". Or that only PART of reality is present. Or that what is in one location, is missing from another location. THAT is what the ego thought system is based on - the OPPOSITE of omnipresence. The idea that there is limitation, lack, an inability to share, isolation, confinement, exclusion, partiality, loss of wholeness, locality and so on.

Particles of matter, including formations as the human body, are merely ideas of this breakdown in omnipresence. They are "localizations" which EXCLUDE what is outside in order to define something exclusive to the inside. "A little fence the Son of God has surrounding himself with" (paraphrase).

The body is an attempt to REJECT a vast majority of what exists, while simultaneously taking EXCLUSIVE possession of one little tiny part - which is the idea of specialness. And this is also why "special relationships" revolve around the body and keeping the body real. The body "disconnects" you from sharing the whole. It asserts that only a tiny PART of yourself is here, while the rest of you is forgotten. Or that there are special things here which are not present anywhere else - uniqueness. And it is this uniqueness that the ego loves to worship. Something that makes you seem DIFFERENT, something about your self that no-one else has. Something that SEPARATES YOU OUT.

This is why the body is always fundamentally a device for separation, even in its most spiritualized form of being used by the mind to try to extend love in the world. The body must go, because it is the "concentration" of "omnipresent-space" which attempts to SHUT OUT the whole in order to focus on the part. The whole (God) and the part (Son/soul) has to be fully united in omnipresence in order that they SHARE fully everything everywhere with each other. Separation from God is merely the attempt to separate part from whole and identify yourself as partial. This is why it has only affected a PART of your mind.

This is also why there cannot be a body of ANY KIND in omnipresent reality, because this would isolate and separate us from each other. We would not be able to SHARE, because bodies are devices that PREVENT sharing.

The unique thing we need to realize, is that while we are very used to living in ISOLATION, trapped in a body, fenced off and kept apart from the rest, this is HIGHLY UNNATURAL. In our natural state, WE ARE EVERYWHERE, we share ALL of creation, WE ARE OMNIPRESENT LIKE GOD. This follows also the law of God which is the Golden Rule. You are IN your brother. Your brother is IN you. God is in everyone. We are all everywhere.

This is why miracles unite you with your brother, and restore the omnipresent reality. You don't merely join or connect or 'touch', your MERGE and OVERLAP and SHARE SPACE. You exist in the same exact location as everyone else, sharing infinity forever.

"The mind is a very powerful creator, and it never loses its creative force. It never sleeps. Every instant it is creating, and ALWAYS as you will."

This means that your mind is CONSTANTLY CAUSING STUFF TO HAPPEN, AT ALL TIMES, WITHOUT STOPPING.

And that means, regardless of whether you think you have the power to make things happen or not, whether you are very powerful or totally powerless, YOU ARE ALWAYS CAUSING IT WHATEVER STATE YOU ARE IN.

Therefore even if you are in suffering and sickness you MUST BE MAKING IT HAPPEN.

Even if you are dying you MUST BE CHOOSING IT.

Even if you are unhappy because you think someone did something and that you're "held" in this unhappy suffering due to forces outside your control, IT IS NOT TRUE, YOU ARE CHOOSING TO SUFFER.

Your mind never stops causing. It never sleeps. It is always ON. It is always creating or projecting. YOU ARE PERMANENTLY CAUSAL.

Therefore if you can realize this, it means literally that NO MATTER what seems to be happening or what seems to have caused it, YOU CAUSED IT - this is the secret to salvation - and therefore YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR MIND AND CAUSE SOMETHING ELSE. Therefore NOTHING happens outside of your decision, so WHATEVER you are experiencing YOU DID CHOOSE IT!

This is precisely reflected here:

"Decisions CANNOT be difficult. This is obvious if you realize that you must ALREADY have made a decision NOT to be wholly joyous if that is what you feel. Therefore, the first step in the undoing is to recognize that YOU ACTIVELY DECIDED WRONGLY, BUT CAN AS ACTIVELY DECIDE OTHERWISE."

"I must have decided wrongly because I am NOT at peace.

I made the decision myself, but I can also decide otherwise.

I WILL to decide otherwise, because I WANT to be at peace."

This is all about you being 100% FULLY RESPONSIBLE for having DECIDED - CHOSEN - to experience what you are experiencing. If you are afraid, unhappy, sad, grieving, sick, dying, in pain, confused, mentally ill, whatever it is, YOU HAVE CHOSEN IT. You HAVE decided to experience it, and you have ASKED FOR IT. And you have received as you have asked and it has been given you.

This is what the Song of Prayer pamphlet is talking about - that you are ALWAYS ASKING and your prayer is always being answered, and therefore whatever you are receiving YOU DID ASK FOR, and therefore if you want something else you need to "raise your prayer" to a higher happier level - a happier request.

Whenever you think that something is happening that you did not ask for, or that you have no power to stop or change something, or that you are stuck with suffering, or that there is no way to change situations, YOU ARE WRONG. You are mistaken and you are UNCONSCIOUS of the part of your mind that is CHOOSING IT. Therefore you HAVE made a wrong decision. You have to totally own it. And you have to admit that YOU decided it yourself. And then you can also start to realize that you WANT to decide something else, and that IF YOU DO, you WILL EXPERIENCE SOMETHING ELSE, because your decision making has POWER.

This means, in no uncertain terms, that you are NEVER A VICTIM. Victimhood is completely impossible. It is a lie. People who are in a victim state are STILL DOING IT TO THEMSELVES, they just are not aware of it. They are STILL CHOOSING IT AND WANTING IT. Even if it looks like they have absolutely no clue why it's happening to them against their will. They are NOT VICTIMS. They are deliberate choosers who are unconscious of their decision making and who have decided to HURT THEMSELVES.

Jesus affirms that "you cannot be hurt UNLESS YOU HURT YOURSELF" and similarly "those who are sick do not love themselves for if they loved themselves they would heal themselves." He also confirms that "no-one dies without their own consent" because you HAVE TO CHOOSE DEATH in order for it to happen.

This is THE CENTRAL TEACHING of A Course in Miracles, that you have absolute unlimited POWER, EVERYTHING that happens you have chosen, NOTHING happens without your consent, and therefore you ALWAYS are receiving what you are asking for. Therefore if you do not like what you are receiving, CHOOSE AGAIN.

"At least I can decide I do not like what I feel now. " "I want another way to look at this." "Perhaps there is another way to look at this, what can I lose by asking?"

This is Jesus's black and white, absolutely no-exceptions teaching. There is NO SUCH THING as a victim. There is NO SUCH THING as an accident. There is NO SUCH THING as dying against your will. There is NO SUCH THING as "becoming sick" without having decided to be sick. There is NO SUCH THING as unwanted suffering. And there is NO SUCH THING as losing the power of your mind to CAUSE.

"This is a course in CAUSE, not effect". That's what this means. Jesus is trying to get us to see that we ONLY CAUSE. We are NOT AT THE EFFECT OF ANYTHING WHATSOEVER! This is the secret to salvation - that you are just doing this all to yourself. There is NO OTHER WILL. There is no alien will. There are no enemies. There are no external forces. Nothing has power over you. Nothing in the world has the power to make you ill or sick or weak or afraid. Nothing can happen to you against your will.

Therefore if stuff is happening that you seem not to have chosen or do not want, it is ONLY because you DID CHOOSE IT but you are unconscious of that choice. That's why you need to remove the blocks to awareness so that you can BECOME A CONSCIOUS DECISION MAKER. Then you will NOT CHOOSE TO HURT YOURSELF! And this is why it leads to salvation, because literally there IS NO CAUSE OF YOU other than God, and you CANNOT BE CAUSED by anything or anyone else in existence. Therefore if YOU STOP CAUSING YOURSELF HARM, you will be permanently invulnerable! IMMORTAL!!!!

We are simply unconscious day-dreaming lazy choosers who have forgotten our own power and are victims of ourselves and nothing else. This is all we have to own up to and correct. To reclaim our INHERITANCE and our right to freely choose. To claim our freedom from fake stories of external un-asked for victimhood, and to erase ALL trace of believing that there is ANY POWER OVER YOU from anything other than yourself. Not even God goes against your will. Not even Jesus goes against your will.

Your power, shared with God, in holiness, is unlimited. "God is unlimited, there is nothing He cannot do." "There is nothing my holiness cannot do." "There is nothing He (holy spirit) cannot do." UNLIMITED, UNOPPOSED WILL POWER. There is NO ROOM in that for any kind of "it happened because I didn't choose it." or "it was an accident" or "didn't intend it" or "didn't ask for it."

There are no real victims. This is Jesus's message. We are only experiencing the consequences of our OWN DECISIONS. "Heaven is a choice I must make." If you so choose, nothing can go against your will. Your will is as powerful as Jesus's will. It is ALL CHOICE.

To the ego, being powerful means recognizing that there are significant powers outside of you which you have to FIGHT WITH in an attempt to dominate and "over-power" them against their free will. It sees power as a way to FORCE things to happen aggressively. This kind of power is DISEMPOWERING to all involved.

To God, and in the truth of ourselves, REAL POWER means the recognition that THERE IS NO OPPOSITION. There is no OTHER POWER. There is no enemy (thus all are innocent). There is no alien will. There is no hand of oppression or "cause of death" that can come along and choose FOR you when you will suffer and die. Death is always chosen. And so if you do not choose it, you will not die. That's the responsibility you have to own up to.

YOU HAVE THIS POWER NOW. IT IS OPERATING NOW. IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN OPERATING. IT ALWAYS WILL BE. It's just a matter of what you are USING IT to do. And if you are using it to hurt yourself, that's a mistaken decision. "Holy Spirit will undo the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him. I choose to let Him by allowing Him to choose for (in favor of) God for me."

You are only ever afraid of yourself. You are your own worst enemy. You are your only victim. You but victimize yourself. You have no opponent. There is no cause outside of you.

You are FREE TO CHOOSE! Choose again. Only by having the POWER TO CHOOSE EVERYTHING do you have the power to choose HEAVEN!

When you perceive that something is 'wrong' with someone else, and that this wrongness does not apply to you, you are SEVERELY MENTALLY ILL.

When you perceive that what applies to another person, due to their apparent separate free will and the idea that they are supposed to be responsible for what they do, in isolation, you are SEVERELY MENTALLY ILL.

When you think that its possible for you to do something to someone else, or to have an attitude or judgement toward them, which does not apply to you in any way, you are SEVERELY MENTALLY ILL.

When you believe that someone else clearly is the guilty party and that you did not do anything whatsoever to ask for mistreatment, and that you have been victimized, and that you are completely innocent and they are completely guilty, you are SEVERELY MENTALLY ILL.

When you hate someone or judge them or are disgusted by them or offended by them or they seem to be totally crazy or they are your worst enemy, in which you are none of these things, you are SEVERELY MENTALLY ILL.

In all the ways of perceiving reality, when you perceive that there is a SEPARATION between what applies to you, and what applies to another, that is MENTAL ILLNESS. And this is the foundation of ALL mental illness. A belief in separation, in all its forms and flavors, is mental illness.

When you perceive that something is happening to you which you did not ask for, when you are receiving something you did not choose, or that you are not receiving you what you did attempt to ask for, that is also mental illness.

When you believe that death is inevitable and that it is going to happen to you against your will and that you will be a passive victim of it, that is also mental illness.

You will notice that the above describes THE MAJORITY OF HUMAN KIND. That is because the majority of human kind IS MENTALLY ILL.

To understand WHY this is mental illness, you need to understand how the mind is supposed to function and what is NATURAL for the mind, as opposed to unnatural. All of the attitudes listed above are unnatural and are NOT normal. They are very commonplace, but they are not normal.

The mind, in every person, is not ever in any way supposed to operate in the realm of separation. Your mind is meant to be whole, which means not only that it is whole within itself, but also that it is part of a greater whole in which all minds are joined as ONE MIND.

This means that everyone shares the same mind. This One Mind is the mind of God. When your mind is One with the Mind of God, you are SANE. God is permanently whole and permanently sane and there is no separation of fragmentation in God's mind. You can share God's mind, and that is your NATURAL CONDITION. And it is in sharing God's mind fully that you MUST experience PERFECT HEALTH - perfect divine immortal health.

When your mind is separated off from the whole, and therefore sees itself as separate and limited, it will also see itself as containing limitations and separations. This is what gives birth to EGO. The ego is INSANITY. When there is ego in your mind, i.e. a lack of wholeness, a lack of oneness, a lack of unity with God, you WILL experience insanity - mental illness.

So then as you go around the world perceiving that a given person is "not you", and another person is also "not you", and that there is not something IN them that is exactly the same as what is in YOU, you are in mental illness. You have entered into a private hallucinatory world of separation and division and SELF ATTACK. As soon as you believe in separation in any way, your whole mind must attack itself in an attempt to set one part of itself against the other part. This self attack produces ALL SICKNESS, and all sickness is a form of MENTAL ILLNESS.

Once you are in mental illness, you will perceive that other people are separate from you, that there are separate rules that apply to them which don't apply to you, that what they will is different from what you will, that something can apply to them that does not apply to you, you are in mental illness. Once you start to treat them in a different way than you treat other people, or react to them differently based on their behavior, or have a different attitude of specialness based on who they are or what they exclusively do for you, you've moved away from the UNCONDITIONAL LOVE which is the condition of the WHOLE mind, and have entered into conditionality. Conditionality is insanity.

So then when you are hating the political candidate for the opposition, or when you are against that other sports team, or when you hate that person who seemed to do something to someone against their will, or when you judge someone for the form that they appear to take, or when you can only love a special person and nobody else, or when you believe that you are right and someone is wrong, or that you are good and someone else is bad, THAT IS MENTAL ILLNESS.

It is not natural. It is not normal. It is extremely common and almost everyone on this planet IS mentally ill. This IS a crazy world, but it doesn't have to be.

So when we talk about mental illness, let's be clear about what sanity really means (One shared mind of wholeness and peace and unconditional love), and that anything other than this is mental illness in one form or another. Everyday people rising up 'against' some other group of people, is mental illness. Everyday people attacking some other group righteously because of how that other group is 'less spiritual' or 'less honest' or 'less good' or whatever, that is mental illness. And its YOUR mental illness, not theirs.

All forms of separation are mental illness. All perceptions of separation are mental illness. And all other commonly recognized types of "mental illness", which people would normally call mental illness, such as paranoia or schizophrenia or psychosis or whatever, those are just the more noticeable EXTREMES of mental illness. That doesn't mean that all the other people are SANE. Almost every psychiatrist on the planet is insane. Almost every doctor or nurse on the planet is insane. Almost every pastor of churches or preacher in religions is insane.

The only sanity is in God, with God, joined with God, one with God, as God's Holy Son who is permanently sane and whole and complete, devoid of separation and lies. Only in TRUTH is there sanity. So before we judge other people for being insane or 'not right', let's remember that WE are just as insane and we need to work on our own mental health instead.

God has created you as an infinite, immortal soul, who is perfectly complete and lacking nothing.

There is nothing that you need to add to yourself to improve yourself or to make yourself in any way better than God created.

You are lacking nothing at all. You are perfect.

God created you as a beautiful soul filled with love and joy and perfectly creative. Fully equipped to exist in Heaven and to extend love forever. You need nothing else.

When Jesus says "There is nothing about me that you cannot attain. I have nothing that does not come from God. The difference between us now is that I have nothing else." he is talking about the fact that He is simply being ONLY the Self that God created. He has not added anything or taken anything away. He is being his normal, natural God-created self.

This perfect self is hiding underneath every idea of imperfection, lack, separation, limitation and death. God already has created you with perfection, to be perfect, forever. You are flawless.

And since you are created from creativity and from love, you are endowed with creativity and love. You are permanently miraculous. There is nothing that you cannot create with the power of the mind, in accordance with God's will, to increase the Kingdom.

Somewhere inside you, you know this. There is a place in which your soul is already within you, perfectly holy, undefiled, unchanged, unaffected, perfectly sane, happy and at peace. It's already there. God creates only permanent creations which cannot change.

Your soul is divine, forever. "Spirit is in a state of grace forever."

The ego always has an ulterior motive, a secret agenda, and a hidden plan that it would hide from you while it lies to your face.

Or rather, while you lie to yourself.

When the ego says you are afraid, it makes out that you're not choosing to be afraid, and that someone else is the cause. This isn't true. Secretly it wants to be afraid so that it can scapegoat someone and displace its own guilt onto others.

When the ego says you are guilty, it makes out that someone else has found you guilty and that there's nothing you can do about it. This isn't true. Secretly this belief in guilt is a choice that you're doing to yourself, you're the one who decided to be guilty, and you are doing so that you might keep your plan to be a separate individual.

When the ego says you have sinned, it tries to claim that this is because of something you really did, but this isn't true. Secretly you know that you cannot sin and did not do anything wrong, but are making out that you did, because you want to be sinful, so that you can continue your plan to be separate from God. Even if being sinful seems like a horrible experience, this horrible experience is 'worth it' if it means you can inch closer to death.

Death is your ultimate goal because it's through deaths doorway that you imagine you can finally escape from God's wrath and be born into a new reality where you are completely independent of God and have no need for Him. You hold this in your sights at all times, regardless of what seems to be happening or why, secretly planning on death every step of the way. Even if it means seeming to have to suffer sinfulness, or guilt, or fear, or punishment. Because there is always this secret ego agenda of self-destruction.

These secrets are all a part of denial, which is your attempt to deny that you are deliberately trying to die, or that you deliberately want to be a separate identity. You use denial to disown the choice you keep making for death, and to pretend that you're inching along toward it against your will, and driven by forces outside your control. To suggest you are not doing this to yourself is denial, and you layer denial upon denial upon denial to try to bring about a complete suppression of yourself, so that you can pretend to be someone else.

All along the way, we maintain and keep these special secrets. They are the secret truth that we are really doing this all to ourselves. It's the secret that we don't want to be revealed, because if we were to own up to it and be responsible, the illusions we're making which create the appearance that we're unwillingly being dragged to the grave, would be totally blown. We wouldn't be able to believe our own self-deception if we were to admit that we were the one choosing every single part of this.

And so sin, and guilt, and fear, and punishment, and suffering, and death, are all things we're choosing on purpose, because we see death as the way to achieve independence from God. It's what we've wanted all along, and we constantly pretend that we DON'T want it, SO THAT we can have it. Choosing to appear to have no choice, is a choice to have no choice, which is a choice to choose to die. Choosing to be afraid, choosing to be guilty, choosing to suffer, but claiming and making the illusion that this is absolutely nothing to do with what we want. Bullshit.

Secrets and lies, secrets and lies. How about some honest owning up to being powerful, immortal, invulnerable and not a victim?

I often fall for the trap of trying to be right. After of a period of time of trying to be right over and over again, I noticed that this rightness was basically a position of defensiveness, trying to defend (and therefore attack) against some kind of perceived 'wrongness' outside of me.

The trouble is that the wrongness is not really outside of me, it's a part of my mind, but the rest of my mindbelieves it is separate from it - disassociated from it. So really when I'm being right, I'm going into my persona and am rejecting my shadow, projecting it onto someone else and trying to position my persona-identified self as more correct, more truthful, more real.

This is a position of war, because always these situations of being right involve conflict - seemingly with someone else, but really with some part of myself. So long as someone else seems to be the opposite of my position, it becomes very easy to see my wrong-focused shadow projected onto them. It's a convenient way to get rid of my own wrongness and guilt.

So even if I seem very annoyed about someone being wrong, and I'm going to lengths to correct them or prove myself right, I secretly want them to be wrong so that I can put all of this sense of wrongfulness onto them, finding myself seemingly more innocent as a result. I get to look like the innocent victim who is just defending the truth, and they get to look like the evil monster who is hell-bent on destroying it.

This is all happening inside our own mind when we start to dig in our heels and be right. And the thing is, in this world there are many many situations in which, according to normal rules and laws and seeming "facts" (really illusions of truth), we can fall for this and believe that someone is "really wrong". We think there is a truth to the illusion that they are wrong, and react to it with righteousness in trying to separate ourselves from this perceived untruth. But separation itself is untruth.

We have to learn then to allow others to seem to be wrong, if they seem to be, recognizing it's not that they really are wrong, but only an illusion that they are, and that if we just react to that with ego we will just move into the persona and project our shadow guilt onto them. We need to let them be wrong, if they seem to be, and choose not to rise up in this mode of holier-than-thou, or the one who is good and righteous and correct. One person being wrong and one person being right is just an inner war, in which there is no peace.

Learning not to go into this mode of projection and wrong-making when, given the situation, it seems that you *actually* are correct, is a very subtle trap. It's easy to recognize you are being right when the other person is actually right and you're actually mistaken, on whatever ego grounds. But when the other person *seem* to be wrong, given the facts and so on, this makes it much harder to drop the 'role' of being the 'right one', or falling for the temptation of believing that something "really wrong" is happening outside of you.

Even when we are technically right, correct, or know a greater truth, we have to learn to surrender and not use it as a way to judge or to make others wrong for not seeing it. It's quite a subtle trap, and I fall for it all the time, lol. What ends up happening is I am defending the ego in me, thinking that I am defending some kind of truth, and only make myself be in conflict.

I can choose peace instead of this. I'd rather be happy than right.

Somewhere deep down inside you believe you are unworthy of God. You think God doesn't want you and doesn't love you. Or that even if He does, you don't deserve it.

Because you forgot who you are - that you are love itself - when someone came along and didn't love you it made you believe it meant something. It means you didn't' deserve love. That you were unwanted. It made you believe there is a separation between you and love - between you and God.

At some point you're going to have to confront that and question it, if you are to be able to open up to the possibility that you are loved and worthy. You need to heal the gap created by this idea that you are separate from love, that you are not where love is, that love has abandoned you and doesn't want you. Because the truth is, you ARE love.

Since you are love, you deserve love, you are wanted by love, you are loved. You are God's child and He loves you very much. The stuff you believe that says otherwise ... you have to get rid of it. It's standing in the way of the great REUNION that awaits you with God.

Because love is meaningful, and is far more meaningful to you than anything else, and because you love God more than anything else, all the bullshit about sin and guilt and fear is totally meaningless to you in comparison. You made up sin and guilt and fear to try to explain why God doesn't love you, or why you are unworthy of it.

None of it is true. It is all completely false. It's like a bunch of statements about yourself that are all completely untrue of you and every single one of them can be discarded. "God doesn't love me because I did this and that" "God doesn't love me because I sinned" "God doesn't love me because I pushed Him away" etc... its all false bullshit.

You know sin and guilt and fear are not true of you, because you know that ultimately you love God and God loves you. All that other bullshit is totally not true, and in all honesty, you will admit it. You made it all up. You're not really sinful or guilty and have no reason to be afraid of love.

Healing the rift between you and God is all you need. He loves you and you love Him. Everything else is irrelevant.

This is what came to me this morning after half an hour of being a blubbering mess and finding it extremely hard to admit or accept that this is true. I had to push through old beliefs and hurts to catch a glimpse of this. I still don't fully believe it, but I took some steps forward and was willing to release some baggage that stood in the way.

Ultimately the entire so-called 'separation' is nothing more than a mistaken belief about what has happened to your relationship with God and Your Self, and none of it is even remotely true. You just want to be with God, and that's all. It's the most meaningful, heartfelt desire in your entire being. You hope and long to be able to go back to God and to feel completely loved again. That's all you want.

You are wanted by God. You are loved by God. You deserve God's love completely. That is all that this is about. You just had a big misunderstanding in your primary relationship (with God) and went off all upset and afraid that you did something really bad, and you were totally wrong about that. God hasn't been hurt, He's not even upset with you and you didn't even really do what you thought you did.

You can come Home. You are welcome. You are loved. All is forgiven. You are safe.

For something to be special it has to have a value that is different to the value of something else. We give it its value by taking away value from something else.

So if I have an apple and an orange, which are essentially equal, and I say, well, I like apples more than oranges, I have to 'demote' the orange and withdraw some of its value and give it to the apple. Now I have a sense that the apple is more important or 'special' than the orange.

What this does, is it makes me have a 'special love' relationship with the apple, and a 'special hate' relationship with the orange. I've also turned the apple into an idol, and the orange into an enemy.

The Course also talks about how we use special love to cover up special hate. The ego has made a world from separation and has made everything in the world be separate. This is based on hate. It is an attack on God. However, the ego then comes along and tries to 'cover up' and deny this hate by creating the illusion that things are somehow joined. It does this by the illusion of 'sameness', things being similar, of like mind, or having minimal conflict.

Minimally conflicting individuals end up as 'friends and allies'. And as the Course says, these allegiances are formed because two people temporarily agree to be against something else. Thus their allegiance still 'includes' an idea of attack and rejection, because it can't exist unless 'everyone else' is not like them. Thus the friends become special and have a special love relationship. But this special love is at best temporary, and covers up the foundation of the relationship which is hate. Separation from others. Isolation. Exclusivity. And so if something takes away that veneer of special love, it 'reveals' the hate beneath it and the claws come out.

While we attempt to make certain parts of the world more important or valuable than others, we make them special. This is our attempt to 'spiritualize' the dream. We attempt to make some parts more spiritual than others, so that at least some of the parts seem sacred, spiritual, holy, valuable, rather than it all being equal and neutral. In this way the ego holds onto these parts of the dream to make it real and to be attracted to it. And of course, to be attracted to one part of the dream requires the formation of a 'shadow' attitude which is against other parts.

So for example, to me, Apple Mac computers are more special than Windows PC's. Green grass is more special than brown. Summer days are more special than winter. Certain TV shows are more special than others. The olympics are more special than regular team sports. And raspberry-anything is more special than most other flavors. These are things I've made special, at the expense of other things being despised and disliked.

This is where the Holy Relationship comes in. With a goal of true holiness, we recognize that instead of depending on another separate thing to 'get' what we lack, or to reinforce our own self-specialness, we instead become wholly dependent on God. It is now God who created us, not our parents. God now also created our children, and he is responsible for them, not us. This of course dissolves all family structures. Absolute equality is the only family - God's family. Equality dissolves specialness and sees everything with unconditional love.

You can still be having your relationships and your favorite foods and whatever, but eventually we will let Holy Spirit choose everything for us and we will live in freedom. We may well remain with those we had special love with and no longer see them with specialness. But this doesn't mean we don't love them. It means we love them even MORE. We love them with an unconditional, ego-free love. One where being together is voluntary and not forced, or maintained out of guilt. But not until we are truly ready to accept this. It can't be forced while we still value specialness or we will experience sacrifice and loss.

You can still be in a one-to-one parternship all the way to waking up. Just look at Jesus and Mary as an example.

"This meant that man had no needs at all. If he had not deprived himself, he would never have experienced them. After the Separation, needs became the most powerful source of motivation for human action. All behavior is essentially motivated by needs, but behavior itself is not a Divine attribute. The body is the mechanism for behavior."

"Within HIMSELF he HAS no needs, for light needs nothing but to shine in peace, and from ITSELF, to let the rays extend in quiet to infinity."

"It is a recognition that you HAVE no needs which mean that something must be DONE."

"Father, in Heaven it is different, for there, there are no needs."

"I need do nothing".

If you do not believe you HAVE love, that you are love, and that you share love, you will see yourself as lacking love. This absence of love, emptiness, darkness (absence of light), will form a barrier against the love that is in you, blocking it from sight.

You will then "seek and not find" love FROM anywhere else, because you don't recognize that it is in you already. You'll see yourself as "in need", and DEPENDENT UPON, others, to supply the lack of love to you. This forms the foundation of "special love", in which you want to be loved by anyone BUT YOU, need to be loved, request to be loved, and try to coerce others into loving you. Self hate produces murderous desperation.

A healthy person does not need anyone to love them because not only is God loving them 100%, they are receiving that love and they ARE love. They can't experience the absence of love in themselves, and so have no "need to get love". And so they are now seeking special relationships in which to try to satisfy a gaping hole.

When you are needing love from others, you are believing that you are unworthy of love, so the seeking for love is not really genuine. On the surface is seems like you desperately want love but underneath it's based on the belief that you seriously are lacking it. And both contradictory beliefs are held in unison. So long as this is the case, love won't be received or deeply accepted within you. Nor can anyone give you what you really already have.

It's a myth that we are supposed to be "loved by others". Or rather, it is natural to be loved by everyone but it is unnatural to NEED to be. Love can be shared, but you share love not because you need it. You share it because you HAVE it, and because it brings you joy to increase it by sharing it, by giving it and receiving it equally. As soon as you enter into a lack of love for yourself, you will see love's absence and try in vain to find it somewhere else.

This inevitably is going to produce codependency because now you are in a position of trying to bargain for love, to coerce, to manipulate and control, while also being dependent on the source of that love. Addicted to getting the love from "somewhere else", or "someone else". Feeling like crap when you're not around them. Having an illusion of feeling somewhat better when they're giving you what your ego wants. Upset when they reject you. Unable to SUSTAIN a state of happiness regardless of what people are doing.

We have to be the love. We are the love. Love is our natural inheritance. If we block awareness of it we'll think we don't have it and won't give it. But by giving it you activate the flow and begin to acknowledge that you have it. It's natural to flow love when you are naturally unlimited and not blocked. It doesn't take effort. Being effortlessly loving is natural and miracles are natural expressions of love. But if we can't or are unwilling to acknowledge the perfection, lovability, divinity, holiness, innocence etc in ourselves, we aren't going to allow ourselves to recognize that we have the love already.

God put love in you, because God is love. You are permanently a host to God. Allow God to be in you and through you and you are already filled to overflowing. Reject God and you reject love and become needy. Accept God and you receive love and have no needs.

If God created you perfect, and you cannot change because you are permanent, then what the heck are you doing trying to change yourself?

Ultimately, being able to accept the truth about you is all that is asked of you. And that means, surrendering everything else that you're trying to do to define yourself or be different from how God intended.

God is the one who created you, and He is the one who knows your 'natural', Real Self. And you cannot change that. I repeat, you cannot change that. It is permanent.

So really what we're doing is we are fighting with reality, a reality that we cannot change. And yet we keep trying to change it. And we believe we already changed it.

The only way we're going to be able to accept the truth, is to completely surrender everything else we're doing to avoid the truth, and that actually includes being a 'seeker', and attempting to 'grow', and trying to become something you are not already in truth.

So really, if you can't change the FIXED reality that God has put in place for you, you only really have two options. Either you fully accept it and just settle into it and give up trying to fight it (and be tremendously happy and at peace), or you fight against it (and be unhappy).

It would be sane of us to accept the truth of who we are. It is insane not to. Because to not accept it is an attempt to suggest reality/God can be changed, and this is impossible, and will never be accomplished. So to try to do that anyway, is completely futile and a ridiculous waste of effort.

But can we accept this? Can we completely just drop everything and accept what is true? Eventually at some point we're going to be to be willing to do this if we want to wake up to reality.

You may think there are things about yourself that are unacceptable. But think about that. What realm do those things live in? Do they live in the realm of reality and truth, in which you can ONLY be acceptable? Or do they live in a realm of unacceptability where there is only lies? So that means... everything about yourself that you cannot accept, is not true anyway. So its not true that you are unloveable. Its not true that you are flawed. Its not true you are imperfect.

And who would want to accept their imperfections? Imperfections are not real. Who would want to try to find peace by accepting separation from God, or death? You can't. But you can transcend these things with true acceptance, which means accepting the truth. And the truth is, you are immortal, and you've never changed.

So if you've never changed, then you are already as God would have you be (in your true self). So why not accept this already? This is why you ultimately need do nothing - provided you're not doing anything ELSE.