The ego is extremely sneaky and insistent that things are true which are not true.

Here you are, created by God to be absolutely immortal and innocent and invulnerable forever, and yet in spite of this, there's the ego saying "oh, that's not true, you're actually mortal and you need to be concerned that something's gone wrong".

Even though this is IMPOSSIBLE. Even though it can't be true.

So to the ego it's not really that it comes up with stuff because it has a basis in reality, but that it comes up with stuff to try to deliberately defy the truth and insist on its falseness. Even in the face of truth and obvious evidence the ego will refuse to believe it's true.

The ego just wants to believe stuff is happening that isn't happening, that things have gone wrong in ways that they haven't, that there are reasons to be afraid which are completely unfounded, etc. It's basically having a nightmare and trying to prove that it's real when it isn't.

It doesn't matter how many times you tell the ego that it is mistaken, it does not want to believe it.

It could actually be possible right now that you are absolutely 100% safe and everything is absolutely fine in every way. And yet at the same time, the ego will try to insist that there are all kinds of problems and issues and reasons to be afraid.

You could even be standing right in front of a brilliant white light which is showering you with unconditional love, and the ego would be saying "what light, there is no light, I don't deserve love". Even if it's right in front of its face!

The ego HAS to insist that its lies are the truth otherwise it could not exist. And the ego NEVER will have a different story. It will always be trying to insist things have gone wrong. It will always be trying to claim you should be afraid and guilty. Regardless. It isn't based on whether it's true or not, the ego has a one-track mind with a one-track story. It isn't objective, it doesn't make rational decisions, and it isn't in any way interested in ever turning around and telling you "you know what, I was mistaken, there actually is a God of love and you actually are unconditionally loved and perfectly innocent and safe and holy forever." It will NEVER say this.

So why listen to a totally biased, one-track pony, which pretends to be objective, and which pretends to have considered all the possibilities and come up with some 'rational' truth, when in fact it NEVER comes up with truth. It cannot. It cannot see the truth. It does not want to see the truth. It is an attack on truth. And it will ONLY tell you the same answer over and over and over again. It's "yes or no" switch has gotten stuck in the "no" position and it literally is incapable of telling you that God is real or that you are loved and safe or that nothing has gone wrong.

Why listen to a broken record? How many times will you listen to the same old same old same old story of disaster and tragedy, once you know that the storyteller (the ego) has nothing new to say? It is not on your side. It is not telling you objective, rational, truth-based conclusions. It can only lie and it can only make you afraid.

Turn to the Holy Spirit for the only source of real rational truth and real sanity and real objectivity. In His light you can see that, in fact, there is another answer and another way, a better way, because the Holy Spirit is OPEN MINDED enough to be able to DISCERN what is true and what is false. The ego cannot do this.

When you are whole, you have only one identity. You are identified with Spirit. You are one with Holy Spirit. You are at peace.

When you begin to believe that illusions are actually reality, entering into the separation state, you put denial in place to shut out awareness of God, and therefore awareness of your "whole self" (Holy Self, True Self etc) seems blocked.

Once this denial is in place, which is an act of believing in real sin, you have tried to attack your wholeness and God’s wholeness with an idea of separateness. You therefore put illusions of separateness into your own mind. These show up inside your own mind, or to put it another way, inside your own self.

So you "split yourself", in the same way that two people seem separate. The split seems like a wall coming inbetween two identities. At the same time, both of these identities are separated from the whole self and God.

Neither "part" of the split mind has awareness of the whole, because these parts, which have come about because you believed in separation, are both cut off from being aware of the whole mind. Neither of them "identify with" the whole self.

So now you have this whole mind which remains whole, in truth. Then you have this fictional scenario playing out INSIDE your mind, where there is this strange dream of separateness and division.

What keeps the parts of the split mind separate are simply illusions - appearances - that there is something about each part which is different to the other, causing them to seem to be "not each other". This cannot be true in reality, but within the split mind (consciousness), you develop a multiple personality disorder.

This split plays out as dreams of various dramas of conflict. Other terms for this conflict are war, self-attack, condemnation, judgement, the whole drama of victims and victimizers, some things being good and others bad etc.

The funny thing is then, within your whole mind, there is sort of a "stage" with a "play" being performed, with characters, and there are at least two main characters. And each character is seemingly "opposite" to the other in as many ways as possible. They want nothing to do with each other, they want to emphasize the ways in which they are separate and unlike, so that the illusion of "why" they are not ONE is reinforced and maintained.

One of these major parts of the split mind is the persona, and the other part is the shadow. I don’t think the course explicitly uses those terms/words, but it definitely does speak about this in many places and ways.

In order for there to be multiple selves in the mind, ie identities, false identities, there has to be denial and the purpose of that denial is to "shut out" one of the selves from the awareness of the other one. There are whole sections about this in the course.

The "persona" part of the split mind as we’ll call it, is really a part of the ego which attempts to create an illusion of innocence. Really the purpose you had in creating the split to begin with was an attempted solution to your belief in sin.

You figured that "all of you" was sinful, and you could not tolerate this idea. There was no way to KEEP it and also escape it. You wanted to keep "real sin" because that was your tiny mad idea/wish. So you made up a solution which is totally insane, but which creates an illusion of it working.

The solution is to section off one part of your mind where you’ll house all the "bad" or "rejected" or "condemned and sinful" parts of yourself, and then you’ll keep another part of the mind where you’ll create an illusion of a completely "innocent seeming" self.

By keeeping the two parts away from each other, ie keeping the fake-innocent self (persona) "in the dark" about the sinful self (shadow), the persona is able to maintain an ILLUSION that "you" did not sin! It shoves all of the evidence of sinfulness into the unconscious shadow part of the mind, attacks it, disassociates from it, and projects it "away" from the persona as much as possible.

One thing to note here is that you did not really want to get rid of your belief in sin. You wanted to believe it as real and irreversible. So you devised a way to KEEP it but To PRETEND you did not want it, so that no one (including you) would suspect or question that you might’ve been the one who did it, so that nobody ever will LOOK AT the fact that it was you, and therefore the idea of real sin goes unchallenged. You make yourself out to seem "innocenct" or even remorseful, with FAKE GUILT, in order to pretend you did not want to sin and weren’t the one to do it, but it’s not true.

This is all taking place still within your mind, entirely. It has nothing to do with what is "outside" of you, or anything to do with anyone else. But because the persona part of the ego disassociates from the shadow, it makes it SEEM "to the persona self" that the shadow-self is NOT ITSELF. Ie it is "other than me".

What happens is you, as the whole mind, who has temporarily lost track of who you are, and who thinks you are a split mind, with multiple personalities, now "sides with" the persona self. It is fictional and totally fake, but it seems to make "you" look like you did not sin. So you allow this persona self to be IN your "conscious awareness", and you make sure to keep the shadow self OUT of awareness in unconsciousness.

The primary function of the persona therefore is to attack your whole self, to identify that some major portion of your self is a sinner and guilty and deserving to die, ie not good enough and can’t be loved because it’s supposedly "evil", it confines all *illusory apperances* of the "bad stuff" and shoves it into unconsciousness, by using denial.

The act of putting "distance" between the persona and the shadow therefore implements *disassociation*, which basically means you do not want to be "associated with" the sin that you believe you committed against God (so no-one would suspect you). So you distance yourself from it using this denial mechanism. This MAKES the shadow ie basically creates an enemy for the persona, who it hates and despises and wants nothing to do with, ON PURPOSE, so that it can KEEP the bad shit away from itself, making an illusion of innocence.

Since this is happening all entirely within the whole of your mind, BUT since you have identified your "self" only with the persona self and not the repressed sinner/shadow, you then "perceive" that you are NOT the shadow self. That it is some "identity" separate from what you are. You disassociate from it so heavily that you literally believe it is NOT YOU. ie, this other part of your own mind is NOT part of your own mind.

What then will happen, however, is the mind cannot get rid of this dark sin, because ideas do not leave their source (!), so it can’t actually get it OUT of the mind, it can only *disguise* it. The persona will then seem to experience that it is now this little helpless innocent-seeming perfect good likeable harmless little self, and that the shadow unconscious self is this big ugly monsterous enemy that it wants to keep hating in order to keep it OUT of AWARENESS. To maintain denial.

Now. What this has actually resulted in in terms of the Son of God, is that within His mind, he has invented these fictional characters, the conscious self who is fake, and the unconscious self which is denied. The conscious self, the persona, SHOWS UP as a BODY! It acts as a visible representation of "who I am", a fake identity, appearing innocent, born seemingly innocent, and no one would suspect that it had tried to murder God.

And then, everything OUTSIDE of the body, the entire "world" and "environment" and all "people who are not me", are actually projections of YOUR OWN UNCONSCIOUS MIND. So your unconscious mind (shadow) is actually outside of your body, and your conscious persona self is inside your body. You can see just how much disassociation there is for an average person, by looking at how much they believe that they are ONLY the self that is "in the body", little and helpless, and everyone else is "not me".

Since the person’s mind is split and the person has identified only with their fake persona self, thinking that everything outside of them is "not my persona self", this happens to map exactly to how we experience the world in terms of bodies and relationships. When another "body" shows up "out there", we regard it as "not myself".

This simultaneously "maps" our unconscious, repressed, disassociated belief that WE SINNED, onto that other person, because just as we believe that our own sinful shit is "not myself", we also believe that that person is "not myself". Therefore it is EASY to "associate" your own disassociated unconscious sin WITH that "not me" other person! This allows you to perceive, and believe, that the sin is IN THEM, it is THEIRS, NOT YOURS, and THEY are the one who was the sinner against God!

Truth is, your experience of what you see "in the not-me selves" - other people out there, is YOUR belief in sin, actually WITHIN your mind still, and you are now interacting with YOUR SHADOW, inside your mind, hallucinating that it is a separate person or content within someone else, and you actually come to believe that this other innocent person is the "one" who is sinning against you.

Any attack you seem to experience, will SEEM like it is being caused by other people. IT IS NOT! It is YOUR other split off part of your own mind - your shadow, attacking the REST of your split off mind - your persona - which you think is "all of myself", but which is only PART of yourself. The persona - your conscious self, who denies that it has an unconscious mind, is "attacked by" this other part of the mind that it believes is not even part of itself.

If you think about it, the only way that it is possible for the persona part of the mind to "be attacked" is if the attacker is INSIDE the realm of where the persona lives. It can only get "access" to the persona because it actually SHARES the same "host mind", and therefore the persona can be attacked by the shadow.

We often, as personas, not our real selves, will believe that the identity who is doing the attacking is "not me", and therefore someone else is attacking "you" (your persona) and it is nothing to do with "you". You will therefore identify with being the VICTIM, who has been unfairly treated and abused against its will, by this "other". This ego persona will see itself as JUSTIFIED in being angry and getting revenge, which it does by further attacking yourself and sectioning off even more parts of you which it deems sinful.

The main function of the persona is to first condemn yourself as a sinner, then try to section off the sinful parts of you to hide them and make them unconscious through denial/disassociation, and to then try to "keep" only the bits of yourself that it deems acceptable, worthy, attractive, valuable, credible, innocent, likeable, good, basically a picture of fake innocence... a picture of someone who no-one would suspect of murder ous intent or a sinful past.

The whole point of the persona is to DENY that you were the one who sinned against God, by pretending to be totally innocent and harmless. To do this, the persona has to attack you, split parts of you off, judge them as bad, make them unconscious, disassociate them from yourself, and only keep the smaller subset of illusory qualities that it says is "acceptable for now".

The persona is a perfectionist and is NEVER satisfied and has impossible standards. The ego thus ranges from suspicious (when in the persona mainly), to visciousness (when the hated guilty shadow self comes out of unconsciousness to express pain and guilt).

You need to realize that the persona is actively GETTING RID OF YOU, by emphasizing all the things that it finds "good" about you, and getting rid of all the things it finds "bad". And sooner or later, because you are never good enough for it (because ego denies love/lovability), it will strip away "bad stuff" until there IS No good stuff left, and you will be DEAD! The persona tries to "preserve a good self" in the name of getting rid of you! It is not on your side and it is not acting in your best interests.

What you need to realize then is that every enemy and attacker and abuser and victimizer is PART OF YOUR OWN MIND. It is the shadow in your mind, which your persona made up, coming back to attack the persona to try to point out the ways that the persona is actually a murderer. While the persona is busy claiming "I did not do it, it’s the shadow’s fault, it’s the sinner", the shadow is going to have in its agenda to "expose" the bullshit lies of the persona and point out the ways that "you" are NOT GOOD, and not pure or holy or right or happy etc. The persona hates this and sees it as attack or violation, but it’s the mind’s attempt to heal itself in a way.

When the unconscious pain (pain body) starts to come into awareness, the persona freaks out in fear and tries to suppress it and get rid of it and avoid it. Trying to get rid of IT is what happens when you try to get rid of OTHER PEOPLE because you think that THEY are IT and getting rid of them will solve your problem! Except the ego’s tactics DO NOT WORK! YOU will keep your shadow self and make it worse.

You have to realize that every attacker is PART OF YOU. And, what is being "attacked by" that attacker, is also PART OF YOU. The key is, the secret to salvation, which is that you are doing this ALL to yourself. You are BOTH attacking you (persona identified self) and are also BEING the attacker (shadow). BOTH of these FAKE CHARACTERS are in your mind. You put them both there. oYu are not EITHER of them

At some point, in your undoing of the ILLUSIONS that keep these two selves apart, and which maintain war, and which keep you thinking that other people are your enemies when it’s really YOU, and that YOU are not even the self that was being attacked, you will start to see through this split-minded perspective.

At some point, you will first of all ACCEPT that BOTH of these things are parts of your own mind, nothing to do with anyone else. That means the attacker and the attacked are both in your mind. Then you will realize, that if they are both in your mind, and you put them there, YOU - whatever you are really - must be maintaining both of them. If YOU are putting both of them in your mind, then YOU are literally the puppet master who is pitting these two selves AGAINST EACH OTHER.

Therefore the war that is waging between "them" is actually FICTIONAL, the claims that each of them makes about what the "other" is doing to the is an ILUSION - a fake story and a fake set of character traits and a fake scenario of victimization, IS NOT REAL.

IF... you, as the whole mind, contain both persona and shadow, and if you are the ONE who has put them there, and if the ways they SEEM to be two separate identities is NOT TRUE, then...

IF you can realize that YOU ARE BEING BOTH OF THEM, then suddenly you will see a COMMONALITY between them, a truth which completely obliterates the entir illusion of separation, undoes all the disassociation, collapses all denial, and totally blows up this whole FICTIONAL PLAY which has been playing out in your mind.

IF they are both you, and you are ONE SELF, looking upon both of them, and realizing that they MUST both be you because *YOU ARE THE ONE DOING THIS ALL TO YOURSELF*, THEN.....nothing about them which *seems* separate can be true. They can’t BOTH exist as separate personalities if they are actually both you - ONE IDENTITY - not two identities.

Seeing this finally collapses the entire illusion, the split in the mind is OVERLOOKED, you forgive yourself for what you did not do, you stop playing the roles of attacker and attacked, victim OR victimizer, and you LET BOTH SIDES OF THE WAR GO. You realize your war with yourself could not be won because, since you were BOTH SIDES, you WERE ALWAYS LOSING, no matter who wins.

Seeing this futility will AWAKEN YOUR MIND to suddenly realizing, that since you are ONE REAL IDENTIY, NOT two fake ones, the fake ones cannot be real. And suddenly, they will DISAPPEAR. And since they were blocking your awareness of the WHOLE of who you are, and since you no longer see EITHER of them as your IDENTITY, suddenly your mind will AWAKEN to accepting and being AWARE OF who you ACTUALLY ARE, as ONE WHOLE SELF!

The fictional ego illusion deream will disappear from sight. Blocks to awareness will vanish. You will no longer pretend you are at war with yourself. You will no longer pretend to be multiple personalities. And you will simply return to your natural whole state of FULL AWARENSS OF ALL OF YOURSELF, as God created you. A mind which is whole, not split. A mind which is HOLY, not evil. A mind which is neither a victim or a victimizer. A mind which cannot BE attacked and CANNOT attack.

And now you are home, back to being who you really are, back with God, and in love FOREVER!

When you blame another person or think that something outside of you has 'caused you' to change in some unwanted way, you THINK that you are being powerful by finding them guilty.

Jesus says in ACIM that anger is an attempt to make someone guilty.

Every time you are angry at someone you are trying to claim and prove that they are wrong.

You think that this makes you more powerful, because you feel JUSTIFIED, and you see yourself as having been unfairly treated.

You did not see what you did to yourself, so you think they did it to you. SOMEONE must be responsible! When you don't see that it was you, you start looking for another cause to pin it on. SOMEONE must be guilty.

It seems to feel empowering and justifying to find out who did this to you. It seems to make you more right and more innocent and more righteous, to point out how someone else was wrong - that it wasn't you.

You couple innocence with attack and justify it by explaining what it was someone ELSE caused.

But when you do this, although it seems like an experience of power and intensity, it is in fact a state of weakness. It is a state of disempowerment. Your attempt to find another person wrong means that you are finding them guilty and weak. But since they are YOU, you are indirectly finding this about yourself.

So as you project your blame, you will also feel guilty, because what you are accusing someone of, your mind (which is one with theirs) knows that you're talking about YOU as well. What applies to them applies to you even if you are in denial of that.

So having this angry reaction doesn't make you powerful, but it makes the ego seem powerful, and you will feel extra justified and innocent when you are like this. You will think this lets you off the hook. It's a way to conveniently shift attention away from YOUR guilt, to point out the guilt of others, so that people won't notice what YOU have been doing. It's a cover-up.

Thinking you have this angry power makes you disempowered, because you're giving away your certainty, peace, and are replacing your REAL innocence with a fake innocence. You're trading the strength and integrity of responsibility, for the weakness and loss induced by believing you are NOT responsible - that it's someone else who is.

If you are not responsible, you are not yourself. If you are not responsible, you are a victim. If you are not responsible, you are vulnerable to attack. If you are not responsible, you will go into unconscious insanity.

This is why as ACIM says, "anger is never justified". It literally is always a lie and always mistaken. You simply did not see what you did to yourself, what you chose, what you asked for, and what you created. If you are blind to your OWN responsibility, you will find everyone else to be responsible instead, because it's just you trying to make sense of WHY something happened.

When stuff goes wrong, it is not anyone's fault. Responsibility isn't fault. Responsibility is faultless.

"I want the peace of God." W185

There's over 100 references in ACIM to "the peace of God". Years ago I wouldn't have thought that peace is something I want. It wasn't a priority. I just wanted all the stupid people to go away, lol.

But the more I've done the course the more it's becoming apparent that peace is very central to the experience I SHOULD be having.

I had a dream a few years ago which showed me an example of extraordinary peace.

In the dream there was a small outdoor scene with some trees and a wild grassy area, and a sort of sky with clouds, although the clouds seemed to be very nearby.

The clouds parted and as they did, they took on an extraordinary emerald green color, rich and vibrant and beautiful. An opening appeared and there floated in, from beyond the clouds, were a pair of beautiful orbs of light, which seemed to be radiating life and light and coloring the landscape as they went.

These orbs were spheres, and glowed gently from within. It wasn't like a dazzling light, just a soft glow. They seemed mostly transparent, and about the size of a bowling ball.

The two orbs floated very slowly and quietly past where I stood, and continued to float on forward, under their own will. But the thing that really struck me was the quality of the atmosphere and how it felt.

The orbs were alive, and were aware, and were extremely peaceful. They seemed to have no ounce of a sense of attack or irritation or disturbance. They were so incredibly calm and quiet, so perfectly innocent, holy even.

They could not not have been more pure, more simple, or more beautiful. They just glided along softly together, as though accompanying each other, and were perfectly unhurried and peaceful.

That's about where the dream ends. But I still think back on it and, when I do, I feel that same peace, and it becomes an inspiration. As I think about what that felt like, I can draw a number of ideas from it.

A total lack of all conflict, a total absence of war, a total lack of any sense of fighting or disturbance or angry aggression. A total innocence, so pure and gentle and simple, like it was just born from God.

No sense of irritation, or annoyance, or frustration or any kind of bitterness or resentment. No sense of guilt or sin or shame or unworthiness. Not the slightest speck of inflammation or agitation or interruption of any kind.

Perfectly calm and tranquil, with no force or pressure, no sense of threat or danger, no concern or worry or doubt or fear. Nothing complicated or distorted, no denial or rejection, no defences, and absolutely no sense of urgency.

Just total calm and total peace and total simple being. Total freedom, total beautiful innocent simplicity, and total calm gentle joy.

This I feel is what I really want, and what we all want. And it highlights how all these things that were absent - are all things that we are so accustomed to living with and tolerating. All the ego emotions and hurts, all the fighting and war and conflict, all the fear and guilt. All of it has to go.

I used to think somehow that the pinnacle of human experience might be some kind of heroic role in which we have superpowers and can do whatever we want, flying around the room with a cloak on. But this ego fantasy of being the savior to wretched peasants is being replaced with a simpler goal of humbleness and quiet.

And when all of that stuff goes, stuff that we think is normal and commonplace, all the sense of separation and tension and conflict goes with it. And what is left is just this lovely extremely calm peacefulness, lacking all sense of something being wrong in any way.

Perhaps that's what we are really. Just simple orbs of light floating around calmly and happily, in total surrender and total contentment, with no enemies and no reasons for concern. Just being at peace with God. Free and alive, floating along with not a care in the world.

Here's your secret. It's a bigger secret than that you tried to kill God's son. And it's a bigger secret than that you attacked God and still want to be separate.

The biggest secret of all, is that you are actually already Christ.

Christ is your true identity. It's who you are.

Now, let's talk about the secret. See, you are trying to disguise who you are. You're trying not to admit who you are. You're trying to deny it and cover it up and pretend you are someone else. Just as you are trying to deny that God loves you, you're denying that you ARE as God created you.

So, here's a useful forgiveness practice. How about we call this... OWNING UP TO WHO YOU ARE. This contains elements of 'taking full responsibility', but also essentially ties it all together in one simple package.

How about you admit to your real identity, and how about you admit to what the truth is about you? How about you come clean and own up to being Christ and to being completely innocent? How about you drop all the pretense that you are someone or something else, or that you have need for all of your pain and misery and problems... which are ALL just cover-ups. Right?

Every single problem in your life, every upset, every unworthiness, every bad experience, every false identity, and every attack you've ever been through, is all part of you denying who you really are. Let's be honest now. Let's own up to who we really are.

I am willing to admit I am Christ.

I am willing to admit that I am not really [your ego name] and in fact I'm God's holy son. Actually it's true that I'm innocent and holy and forgiven completely and have never done anything wrong.

I admit that I am God's child and cannot sin. I have my hands in the air and I CONFESS, I am absolutely immortal spirit and I have never been able to die and I never will die. And I also admit that I am not the little ego self that I keep trying to convince everyone of, including myself, that I am. I am not this separate self I am One.

I admit that I made up this entire illusion to cover up my identity and that I've been in disguise and undercover this whole time, trying to make out that I am some kind of unworthy unlovable nothing, so that nobody will notice what my real identity is. I admit that I have always known who I really am and I've always been Christ.

You're right, I've been pretending this whole time that I'm not with God and that I don't belong with God. It's not true. I've been bluffing this entire time, all these lifetimes, pretending not to be Christ. I've portrayed myself as all kinds of pretend bodies and people and identities to perpetrate a huge conspiracy that I'm someone else and that God' Son no longer exists.

I've been 'undercover boss' this whole time, hiding in the shadows and lurking and not owning up to my power and not claiming my true identity. I admit it, I'm actually God's creation and God has created me permanent and real and I am not any of the illusions that I've been saying I am.

My cover is blown and you caught me out, I'm really ultimately guiltless and sinless and I haven't even separated from God. My whole life story is just a big distraction to get everyone to believe that something happened to me and that I didn't want anything to do with it. I orchestrated the whole thing. I made it all up myself and fooled you all, and even tried to fool myself. I've been in disguise, concealed behind layers of denial and pretend forgetfulness.

Yup. I'm Christ. I confess. I own up to it. It's who and what I am. I am immortal spirit and I always was and nothing has happened to change anything about me. Of course God loves me, He has this whole time, I was just lying when I said He didn't. The lid is off, the cat is out of the bag.

Like, hellllooooooooooo. I'm Christ, ok. ... you got me.

ACIM: "Miracle Principle 7

Miracles are everyone's right, but purification is necessary first."

DICITIONARY: "the process of making something spiritually or ceremonially clean."

What is purification? It is the process of removing "impurities", so that you end up with something that is "pure" and has no impurities in it.

What is it we are purifying? Our minds. We are removing "impure thoughts", beliefs, values and attitudes, so that we can be pure. Or rather, aware of our purity in God.

What are examples of impurities? All of the ego stuff, including evil thoughts, attack thoughts, grievances, unforgiveness, blame, anger, murderousness, all forms of sickness and death, separation ideas, body identification, guilt, fear, a sense of sinfulness, unworthiness, etc.

Heaven is a state of perfect purity. Another word for purity is innocence. It's a state completely devoid of any kind of sin or evil. It's so pure, that there isn't even a tiny trace of desire to attack or hurt, there isn't the slightest hint of anger or resentment, and absolutely no sense of fear resulting from seeing others as attackers.

Heaven is SO pure, it is very likely far more pure than you can imagine. And in order to enter awareness of heaven, you have to purify yourself of all states and attitudes that are impure. This actually entails being willing to give up a whole bucketload of ego things, which you may not be currently totally happy about giving up.

You have to give up ALL anger. You have to give up ALL attacking. You have to give up ALL guilt. You have to give up ALL sin. You have to give up ALL temptation to see yourself as victimized. You have to give up ALL desire to hurt other people. You have to give up ALL guilt, shame, and sense of not being good enough. You have to give up ALL motives relating to trying to get stuff. You have to give up all specialness, all selfishness, and all trace of conditional love. You have to give up unhappiness, sickness, suffering and death. And you have to give up the entire ego thought system.

The end result of this relinquishment, is a state of PERFECT PURITY. It is a purity SO pure that it is utterly immaculate, undefiled, and completely holy. The degree of holiness is off the charts in the extreme. You cannot enter such a state with any trace of malice in your heart or any amount of unforgiveness. You have to have forgiven absolutely everyone and everything, and hold nothing against anyone, and see yourself as utterly absolutely sinless.

Only through the complete removal of the belief in sin can you achieve this, because it is the atonement. It is the recognition that there is no sin anywhere, not in you, and not in anyone or anything. It is a state of TOTAL SINLESSNESS. That doesn't mean like, sin is real and evil is real and you have to stop being that through repentance, but more like, the recognition that these things are NOT real and you CANNOT BE them. That sin does not exist for you. There is only total harmlessness, gentleness, softness and love.

The most holy and pure, the most innocent and harmless, the most gentle and clean, the most unwilling to hurt, the most beautiful and new, are those who have purified themselves of the ego, of temptation and of death. It is the purity of the angels. It is absolute allegiance to God. It is a complete and total surrender of all control and egotism and all false ideas of self. It is the complete letting go of all false goals and made-up laws and artificial identities, and any attempt to be other than God created you.

So ACIM is saying that in order to become miraculous, to access the miracle-minded state in which you can PERFORM MIRACLES, which is a very loving state of sinlessness and holiness, you have to FIRST purify yourself. Your mind has to be decluttered and washed out with the spirit and ALL ego in you has to be utterly removed. You have to be cleansed and spiritually renewed. Jesus refers to this in ACIM also as a "rebirth", like becoming new again, as if nothing had ever happened to turn you into an evil monster.

You purify through whatever process works for you. But let's also realize that forgiveness is really the state OF purity, of atonement and of true perception. We are trying to reach that state. Because "only christ forgives" and that means we need total acceptance and alignment and awareness of Christ, TOTAL, MAXIMAL LOVE, in order to be in a state of forgiveness. Anything we do towards that goal is our "practice" or "application" of course principles in which we are trying to move ourselves CLOSER to that state.

This is why ultimately our entire work with the course up to its end goal of resurrection, is really a process of PURIFICATION, which RESULTS IN a state of total forgiveness. In which you have completely forgiven yourself, ie, have recognized that there is absolutely zero ego or sin or death in you. Where your mind is completely open and clear and in the service of spirit. Where Christ can now move through you, and Jesus can perform miracles through your hands.

To purify, you do whatever works, provided it entails the successful progress of moving closer toward total purity. Closer towards God, who is utterly pure, sinless and innocent. You can't be having attitudes of ego, attack, anger, blame, guilt, shaming, destruction etc, if you are to be pure. You can't be a keyboard warrior on facebook. This is the part the ego in you does not like or want, because it means giving up the things the ego CHERISHES and wants. Its way of relating to others through murderous attitudes. It does not WANT purity or holiness, it wants to be evil and wrong and bad, vulnerable and unhappy and destructive.

You can use catharsis, letting go, surrendering, development of trust, opening your mind, trusting God, various modalities of healing, practicing performing miracles, tuning into the love and light in you, prayer, asking for help, receiving love and healing, inviting the Holy Spirit to operate on you (mind/body/emotions), affirmations, cancelling error, reprogramming yourself, convincing yourself, reminding yourself, doing workbook lessons.

You can purify by forgiving people, polishing up your relationships to make them holy and equal and sharing, learning to be more unconditionally loving, working with the angels, giving the day to the Holy Spirit, seeking out blocks to love and removing them, digging out old hurts and unforgivenesses, getting rid of secret sins and hidden hates in the light, handing stuff over to the Holy Spirit, receiving guidance, doing Christ's work etc.

Whatever works. However you purify, however it is you can get yourself into a state of PURITY, of innocence and holiness. A state where you no longer WANT to hurt yourself, or others. A state where you see your TOTAL SINLESSNESS, and therefore project sinlessness onto others and the world, seeing them as sinless, and therefore having no grounds for fear or blame. Purity gives you harmlessness, just as it also puts your mind into a supernatural state of being invulnerable and IMMORTAL.

The innocent are strong and powerful. They are protected by God. They cannot BE hurt and DO not hurt themselves. "You cannot be hurt unless you hurt yourself." "My attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability" etc. They feel safe and secure and protected and guided. They cannot be attacked and are above the battleground. Nothing can intrude upon them because of the strength of spirit. And they can bestow healing and miracles and life upon those who are not yet purified - those who believe they are the living dead.

Once purification is reached, in part or in whole, you will have access to miraculous power. You will have the innocence with which to love, and the light with which to see. You will have the purity of heart and the total angelic harmlessness and gentleness with which to heal others. "Those who are healed become instruments of healing." You will become a miracle worker, able to raise the dead and resurrect the impure.

You will be able to actually purify others for them. "It is the privilege of the forgiven (pure) to forgive (purify)." And now you are doing God's work, until you go home to heaven, to the state of total and utter purity and innocence forever.

What we do in secret, and separately from God, and thinking that it is not something God is aware of, and which we hope other people do not know about, and how we suffer in silence, and feel things that we don't want other people to know we feel, and think things that we don't want to admit to thinking, this is all us doing it in the 'darkness' of the ego.

Darkness is the absence of light (God) and there can only be a darkness if light is SHUT OUT, which you do by entering into some kind of private, secret world, where you do not 100% fully share things openly. Indeed, coming into the physical world is an attempt to enter into a secret, private world, where God's light is absent - a world of darkness and despair.

If you are not fully 'open', like the shutter on a camera, light cannot get all the way in. If the shutter is closed, you will have a picture of darkness. When you 'shut down', become closed, withdraw, hide, go into secret fantasy land, conceal, deny, resist, attack, or in any way enter into EGO, you are shutting out the light.

Things that you KEEP in the dark, remain seemingly unhealable because you are not allowing them to gain light exposure. Exposure to light shows them for what they are and dismisses them, effectively revealing that they only existed IN the dark and do not really exist IN the light at all.

Therefore, everything that you do in the dark, or in secret, or which you keep buried, or do not want to admit to, ONLY EXISTS so long as you KEEP it in the dark, because it is MADE FROM darkness itself. All illusions are made from darkness. They are not made from light.

So as you expose yourself to God/light/love, these dark things must be exposed to the light and seen IN the light, and since they are not made OF light they do not exist in the light, so when you look IN the light for them you will not find them, because they will have DISAPPEARED. Light shines away darkness because darkness is only the absence of light, not a real thing in itself. This is why shadows disappear when light illuminates the scene. This is why the darkness of night disappears when the sun comes up. Where does it go? It does not exist.

You can stay in the dark and keep your dark illusions and dark fantasies about how dark you are and how real the darkness is, OR, you can open up and expose yourself courageously to God, knowing that GOD DOES NOT ATTACK, and GOD LOVES YOU UNCONDITIONALLY, and ALLOW the light to heal you of this darkness. Love replaces darkness with itself, and you are NOT held accountable for being dark, because you are MADE OF LIGHT.

Darkness is illusion. Light is reality. In truth you are innocent and holy, but if you don't allow yourself to step into the light, you will believe you are sinful and guilty. Only in the dark, where you cannot even see properly, could you think you are sinful and guilty. Only in the light, where you can finally SEE, can you be ABLE to recognize that you are only pure and innocent.

"I cannot see in darkness but in light"

"I am not an illusion but a reality"

- ACIM

Here is a simple and effective forgiveness process which I did this morning with Holy Spirit.

You start by figuring out where you are on a spectrum from Life to Death. The spectrum has these stages:

Love/Innocence > Separation > Sin > Guilt > Fear > Punishment/Suffering > Death.

On whatever issue you want to do forgiveness, or even just a general forgiveness, locate what you seem to be *most directly aware* of right now. For me this was "fear".

Whatever stage you are most aware of, thats the stage which has not yet fully "projected" into the next stage. And all the stages beneath it are currently unconscious. I was experiencing fear because separation/sin/guilt were unconscious and I hadn't yet entered punishment.

Once you've located where your conscious mind is at, work your way backwards through the stages to undo each layer of belief. If you don't need one or more of the earlier steps because you didn't find yourself in them at the beginning, you can skip them. e.g. if you mostly feel guilty, you probably don't need to undo fear.

At each layer of awareness/belief, there are a few steps to go through.

1) You believe that the step is real, and you need to undo this belief. Holy Spirit can help here. Recognize you believe in "real" this (e.g. real fear), and affirm that it is not real (e.g. "fear is not real, I am not afraid").

2) You should then start to have the insight that the only reason you are experiencing this step is because the step you didn't get to yet (unconscious) is CAUSING this step. Separation demands sin. Sin demands guilt. Guilt demands fear. Fear demands punishment. Punishment demands death. Therefore the step isn't there in its "own right", as an isolated 'thing'. It's a projection from another level and is being generated by another level. Seeing this helps you to realize the current level of belief is not the CAUSE of it. It is an EFFECT. And since it's not a cause, it is not real, so you can let it go. Undo the belief by affirming it is not REAL. "There is no real fear" "There is no real guilt" etc. Fear does not cause fear. Guilt does not cause guilt. Sin does not cause sin.

3) Once you can realize that your current level of awareness/belief (the stage you're at) is coming from a hidden level, and you undo the current level by cancelling the belief and the illusion that it was real in its own right, notice that if you do not correct the next level, it will REPRODUCE the experience that you just got done removing! You can remove fear, but if you don't remove guilt, it will reproduce fear. You can remove guilt, but if you don't remove sin, it will reproduce guilt and fear. We have to work our way ALL the way to the Atonement in order to uproot the whole problem.

4) Having undone belief that the current step is real, and affirming you do not believe in it, and having released it (Holy Spirit can help), your mind should have shifted to being aware of the next step/level. If you undid the belief properly, you will feel "free" of the step you were on, should no longer be experiencing it, and will become aware of the experience of the next step. So if you were feeling fear, you should no longer be feeling fear, and will now be feeling guilty. Guilt will be the main thing you are conscious of. Or whatever comes as the next level from where you're at.

5) Continue on through the steps this way until you get to the recognition that sin is not real, separation has not happened, and therefore you are IN the experience of the atonement. If you have undone the belief that the punishment is real, that the fear is real, that the guilt is real, and that the sin is real, and that the separation really happened, you should now be in the TRUTH.

The truth should make you aware of GOD. God's truth should be in some way in your mind, whereby you should now be able to ACCEPT that you are innocent, because you do not believe you sinned. You should be able to realize that you are forgiven, because you did not really do anything. And you should be aware that God still LOVES YOU 100% because you are WORTHY of love, having not done anything wrong.

You may find yourself feeling "I AM FREE". You may experience JOY. You should feel RELIEF. Especially now that you can affirm "I have not sinned, I am innocent". Your mind is now experiencing the truth as your primary, conscious experience. Forgiveness accomplished. And because this has been ACCEPTED and OWNED, and because you've seen through all the illusory levels of the ego thought system, you are now PERMANENTLY FREE of what you forgave. It will not come back, because it has no foundation. The Atonement principle has completely undone the "cause" at its roots.

Your mind is now IN a state of forgiveness. You are in the Holy Spirit. You are now the light of the world. You are the Prodigal Son, and you've come Home!

Trying to be "right" happens when you yourself believe you are guilty ie wrong.

So you first of all believe you yourself are guilty and you're experiencing the guilt. Then, typically, you project the guilt and try to disassociate from it.

So now you see this guilt as being outside of you in someone else, they seem to be wrong etc. And you start to attack the guilt in them.

This is because you yourself are convinced that the guilt is true. You believe that it's true that YOU are guilty. So you are blinded by that and can't see past it.

So as you falsely perceive that the guilt is outside of you in another, you are convinced with a kind of viciousness that the other person definitely is wrong.

But you're really talking about yourself.

Because minds are One in God, you share whatever it is you seem to believe about another. You're really talking to yourself. What applies to them applies to you. So even if it appears they are the one who is wrong ie guilty, you're really indirectly saying that you are.

It only seems to not be about you or "your guilt" because of a disassociation, a sense of unconsciousness, or a block to awareness, which has been erected BY you, in-between your own guilt and your "self". So you've tried to basically disown it, and now you don't acknowledge or recognize that it is "yours".

"You but accuse your brother of your own sins."

So as you're attempting to be right or stand up and be loud and prove that other people are not getting it right or they're wrong in some way, notice that you are actually feeling guilty right now. And it's your own guilt. And because you're convinced that you've sinned somehow, and do not like to admit to it, because you think it's the truth about you, you'll instead prefer to put on a show of attacking it in others by ramming it down their throats and making them wrong. To accuse them of it and hold it against them.

So really, being right is an avoidance of believing that you yourself are already wrong. You believed you were wrong before you even started to fight with the wrongfulness in others. It means you do not want to admit that you believe you are wrong. It's not even really to do with whether you are technically "correct" or "at fault" in an argument, it's more to do with you not being willing to be in a position of "guilt" because you do not want to feel it or let it back into your awareness.

You already have convinced yourself you are guilty, and are trying to avoid it. So even though you're putting on this show of "other people are the one who is wrong", it's all to cover up the fact that YOU believe YOU are wrong.

As usual, the ego mechanism comes up with an illusion which seems on the surface to be the exact opposite of what is actually happening. And that means there is denial happening. The righteousness is trying to deflect away from an actual belief in wrongfulness.

So this is why people who are being "right" do not want to admit to being wrong, and will avoid it at all costs.

What also will happen when you feel guilty is that you will start to deliberately attract and manifest people around you, who you will start to see as wrong, and will start to attack them to prove you are not the one who is wrong. You will start to get into arguments. And to you you'll be experiencing this as though you're just annoyed as shit about why other people are being so wrong, it's all their fault, why are they coming along and putting up resistance so much, why do they not get it, why won't they listen to your viewpoint, and why do they keep denying everything?

Well, it's your own denial, starting to manifest as people who seem like they are in denial. Its your own reluctance to admit to innocence, starting to manifest externally in others as guilt and sin. And it's your own unwillingness to accept the real truth, perceived in others as an unwillingness to accept the truth. What's staring back at you seemingly in other people, entirely "separate" from you, is actually your own attitude about yourself.

The "cure" is simply admitting to the truth, ie admitting to the fact that this guilt is really about YOU and not about them, it's your own guilt which YOU put in place yourself, YOU believed in it, and now you need to question that belief. The belief needs to be found to be FALSE, by you, so that you will let go of this guilt and accept your innocence again.

When you have accepted that you are NOT GUILTY, and are more in touch with being innocent, you no longer CARE about trying to be right, because you know that you are not guilty. In your innocence, you are perfectly happy to be mistaken, and are perfectly happy to be "wrong" if you are, knowing that it does not mean you are guilty, it does not imply sin, and it doesn't make you feel unhappy. You laugh about the fact that you are mistaken or wrong about something and can be the first to admit it. And that means you have no interest whatsoever in finding ways to prove that everyone else is the guilty fucker who needs to die.

You are not guilty but innocent. You are holy and loved. You have no need to be right or wrong either way. You are happiness.

The question is perhaps not so much whether you want to be right or happy, it's whether you want to be guilty or innocent. In your innocence your happiness lies, not in proving that someone else is wrong.

Did a healing for myself after feeling pain in my hand, which was anger I was holding onto.

After a process of visualizing the healing and commanding it to leave etc, I was again not expecting it but.... there was an angel kneeling at my side holding my hand very gently. It kissed my hand.

I felt extremely touched that a being so innocent and pure would bow down and kiss "me"... the impure. It made me feel very worthy beyond my own unworthiness. It then maneuvered and kissed the back of my hand a few times.

I could feel its presence beside me. Again I did not ask for it to come nor did I in any way imagine that there would be an angel involved in what I was doing. But what I was doing once again attracted the angels to assist me.

All pain has disappeared, such that I didn't even remember that this happened until now.

Clearly when we are fulfilling God's will and are expressing the truth that sickness is unreal and that we deserve healing and love, and actually take steps to bring that about, we "align" ourselves with heaven and do what Heaven would do, and Heaven comes to support us in that!