The ego wants to believe that God created this world.
The ego believes the world is real.
The ego believes the body is real.
The ego wants to keep all forms and bodies.
The ego believes bodies and forms are alive.
The ego believes there is value in keeping objects.
The ego does not regard the world as unreal or a dream.
The ego insanely believes the illusory world is reality.
The ego believes God created its world and justifies it.
The ego tries to make its illusory world permanent.
The ego attempts to give the world reality and keep it real.
The ego does not want to look past the world.
The ego does not want to forgive or overlook the world.
The ego puts the world on a pedestal and worships it.
The ego has no conception of a world beyond this world.
The ego is totally in denial of the existence of heaven.
The ego has no desire to believe in a spirit realm.
The ego believes that there is nothing beyond its world.
The ego believes there is nothing beyond the body.
The ego believes you don't even have a mind.
The ego believes your body is your mind and thinks for itself.
The ego believes your body is the cause of life.
The ego both values and hates the body.
The ego manifests as the form of physical objects.
The ego is permanently stuck in false perception.
The ego made the body so as to only fixate on sinful forms.
The ego regards all forms and objects as real sin.
The ego believes everything the body senses and sees.
The ego uses the world as an attack on God and reality.
The ego made this world to defend against reality.
The ego made this world to try to block and deny God.
The ego constructed this world as a wall of sin and death.
The ego uses the world to block the reality of Heaven.
The ego believes that bodies are special and are living.
The ego values the body as a place to hide from God.
The ego does not question whether the world is real or not.
The ego has accepted that the world is real to it forever.
The ego has no intention other than to destroy everything.
The ego manufactured this planet for a reason.
The ego made the world to obscure God's nature.
The ego invented an artificial nature to replace God's nature.
The ego made the world to be completely unnatural.
The ego runs the world based on unnatural laws of death.
The ego has no intention of waking up, nor can it.
The ego pretends it can become spiritual.
The ego spiritualizes the world to lead you away from spirit.
The ego does not want you to leave this world and go home.
The ego regards this world as its home and yours.
The ego has placed the world on a pedestal and worships it.
The ego doesn't believe the world is a dream at all.
The ego has investment, faith and trust in the world it made.
The ego made bodies to ensure your unconsciousness.
The ego surrounded you with forms of error to trap you.
The ego made a world filled with temptation.
The ego made hell, and this world is hell.
The ego has no desire to go towards light or truth.
The ego leads entirely towards darkness and death.
The ego is unaware of the truth about God and Holy Spirit.
The ego sees life here as death and death as life.
The ego is threatened by reality.
The ego has no reality.
The ego's world is not real.
The ego's world is a delusional system of insane dreamers.
The ego made physicality to blind your perception.
The ego made space and time to live inside of.
The ego made planet Earth and all galaxies and worlds.
The ego made the world from unwillingness to accept truth.
The ego materialized the planet from a desire to attack God.
The ego ensures that all things it made will die.
The ego provides no escape from problems of any kind.
The ego built sickness into the world.
The ego tried to make death an inevitable part of spacetime.
The ego does not want you to question the world's reality.
The ego doesn't want you thinking of the world as illusion.
The ego hides in the world, in the body, in the darkness.
The ego is threatened by the idea that there is no world.
The ego sees God as the undoing of itself.
The ego sees the Holy Spirit as making itself invalid.
The ego sees eternal life as death and mortality as life.
The ego doesn't really exist, nor does its world.
"Illusions will not last. Their death is sure and this alone is certain in their world. It is the ego's world because of this. What is the ego? But a dream of what you really are. A thought you are apart from your Creator and a wish to be what He created not. It is a thing of madness, not reality at all. A name for namelessness is all it is. A symbol of impossibility; a choice for options that do not exist. We name it but to help us understand that it is nothing but an ancient thought that what is made has immortality. But what could come of this except a dream which, like all dreams, can only end in death?
What is the ego? Nothingness, but in a form that seems like something. In a world of form the ego cannot be denied for it alone seems real. Yet could God's Son as He created him abide in form or in a world of form? Who asks you to define the ego and explain how it arose can be but he who thinks it real, and seeks by definition to ensure that its illusive nature is concealed behind the words that seem to make it so.
There is no definition for a lie that serves to make it true. Nor can there be a truth that lies conceal effectively. The ego's unreality is not denied by words nor is its meaning clear because its nature seems to have a form. Who can define the undefinable? And yet there is an answer even here.
We cannot really make a definition for what the ego is, but we can say what it is not. And this is shown to us with perfect clarity. It is from this that we deduce all that the ego is. Look at its opposite and you can see the only answer that is meaningful.
The ego's opposite in every way, in origin, effect and consequence, we call a miracle. And here we find all that is not the ego in this world. Here is the ego's opposite and here alone we look on what the ego was, for here we see all that it seemed to do, and cause and its effects must still be one.
Where there was darkness now we see the light. What is the ego? What the darkness was. Where is the ego? Where the darkness was. What is it now and where can it be found? Nothing and nowhere. Now the light has come: Its opposite has gone without a trace. Where evil was there now is holiness. What is the ego? What the evil was. Where is the ego? In an evil dream that but seemed real while you were dreaming it. Where there was crucifixion stands God's Son. What is the ego? Who has need to ask? Where is the ego? Who has need to seek for an illusion now that dreams are gone?"
The whole thought system of ego and being separate from God, is rooted in the idea of murder. This might not be apparent, and you might not think that many of the things you do are murderous. We reserve that term for when a body kills a body for example.
But in the course, "murderousness" is any form of inequality. It's a denial of the Golden Rule, the law of God. In truth what we do to another we do to ourselves, because we are one. But to the ego there is a breakdown in cause and effect, and between self and other. And this gives rise to what seems like a possibility that you can attack (cause) without being attacked (effect). Or that what you do to your brother you do not do to yourself - that what is true of him is not true of you.
This is a murderous idea because it now means that you can attack and escape the consequences. It means you can assign guilt to someone else and not yourself. That someone else can be hurt without you being hurt. And this is the very definition of murder.
Make no mistake also that the ego heavily believes in this, and as a result heavily believes that YOU are murderous, and that you are extremely guilty for having done so. Murderousness is the idea of sin. The ego believes that you have literally murdered God and his son. And as a result, it claims that you should be extremely guilty. This is the core of its belief.
The truth is that it is impossible to murder anything real, the Golden Rule cannot be violated, what you do to another you still do to yourself, you cannot escape consequences, and you have NOT murdered anyone or anything in reality. Therefore you are NOT guilty.
But you're going to find that as you explore this and attempt to undo this belief in your murderous nature, which the ego does heavily believe, the ego is going to put up quite a fight, and its going to keep insisting that you're a very guilty person. Deep down you do believe this, and it's a belief that it highly mistaken and will have to be systematically dismantled with the Holy Spirit.
The ego's desire to kill YOU off, is its belief that YOU have killed yourself off. And since you are the son of God, it believes that you not only are against yourself but that you want yourself to die. This murderousness is a suicidal belief of self attack. But if you cannot be killed, because you are immortal, then you also cannot be guilty, and definitely do not deserve to die.
What we are undoing through forgiveness is a seemingly murderous intention, which claims you have committed the ultimate sin, and therefore at completely guilty and worthy of death. The ego will hold this up in your face and wave it in front of you like it's true, because it believes it is real and has happened. But your job is to NOT believe this, because it can't possibly be true in God's reality.
The ego belief in you IS murderous and wants the total destruction and death of God and his sonship. And it would try to persuade you that YOU are itself, and thus are just as guilty. But you are NOT a murderer, you are innocent and holy. Your belief that you are guilty is mistaken. You are not guilty. You have not sinned. And God still welcomes you with open arms.
"What is NOT love IS murder. What is not loving MUST be an attack. EVERY illusion is an assault on truth. And every one does violence to the IDEA of love, because it SEEMS to be of equal truth. What can be EQUAL to the truth, yet different? Murder and love are incompatible."
"The darkest of your hidden cornerstones holds your belief in guilt from your own awareness. For in that dark and secret place is the realization that you have betrayed God's Son, by condemning him to death. You do not even SUSPECT that this murderous but insane idea lies hidden there. For the ego's destructive urge is so intense, that nothing short of the crucifixion of God's Son can ultimately satisfy it."
"Of this you dream. And, UNDERNEATH this dream, is yet another, in which YOU become the murderer, the secret enemy, the scavenger and the destroyer of the brother and the world you fear alike. Here is the CAUSE of suffering, the space BETWEEN your dreams and your reality. The little gap you do not even see, the birthplace of illusions and of fear, the time of terror and of ancient hate, the instant of disaster; -- all are here. Here is the CAUSE of unreality. And it is here that it will be undone."
"Now, for an instant, is a murderer perceived within you, eager for your death, intent on plotting punishment for you until the time when it can kill at last. Yet in this instant is the time as well in which salvation comes. For fear of God has disappeared. And you can call on Him to save you from illusions in His Love, calling Him Father and yourself His Son."
"A murderer IS frightened, and those who kill FEAR death."
"How can a battle be perceived as nothingness, when you ENGAGE in it? How can the truth of miracles be RECOGNIZED, if murder is your choice? When the temptation to attack rises to make your mind darkened and murderous, remember you CAN see the battle from above."
"The resurrection is the denial of death, being the assertion of life. Thus is all the thinking of the world reversed entirely. Life is now recognized as salvation, and pain and misery of any kind perceived as hell."
Here Jesus spells out that when you reach 'the end', you'll recognize that pain IS pain, and misery IS misery. That life (eternal) IS salvation. Why would he say that?
Because until you reach there, you actually do not recognize what these things are, and think they are something else.
You think that life is death, that pain is pleasure, that misery is salvation. A lack of recognition is largely the only problem we have. Our minds are confused and lost because we've switched around the meanings of things.
What was true has become false, what was false has become true. True has been mixed in with what's false meaning that nothing is true.
And that also has led to beliefs such as that hell is heaven, that suffering is atonement, that death is life, that you can find peace in war, that guilt is attractive, that sin proves your innocence, etc. These sound insane because they are, but that's our state of mind.
So in the reversal of that, when "all the thinking of the world is reversed entirely", ie its backwards confused insane thinking is reversed, everything is seen in its proper perspective and things are recognised for what they ARE, not for what you thought they were.
That means that pain is recognised as actually pain and not pleasure. That misery IS miserable and not something you want. That hell IS hellish and NOT heaven. That death does NOT bring you life. That you cannot find peace in war. That sickness IS sickness and not a defence to save your life. That stuff which is not of God is actually NOT of God.
It also leads to the recognition that bodies are not people. That bodies are not mind. That Earth is not God's kingdom. That impossible things are not possible. That this unreal world actually IS unreal. And also that world cannot do anything to you.
These recognitions, which is enlightenment, properly identifies what everything is or is not. That false things are false. And ONLY true things are true. In this CLARITY, you will be able to make a proper wise decision to choose heaven, because it will be obvious to you that the alternative IS NOT what you want.
You can only move away from what you do not want when you recognize that it is something you do not want. The problem we have is that we think that we want stuff which in truth is not something to be wanted. That the world will save us. That death is our friend. That the ego is our ally. That suffering is better for us than health.
When it becomes clear in true perception, which is "accurate perception", that the things of this world are not anything at all to be had or benefited from, you will give it up. When you recognize that the body is not at all what you are, you will give it up.
You will turn away from the world and toward heaven when you recognize heaven as something you actually do want. When there is no longer fear of God or life or wholeness or happiness or power, recognizing those are things you are entitled to and want, you will choose them again. But to do this you have to be CLEAR about what things ARE, otherwise your guidance system will be off and you'll be confused and make a poor choice.
We choose guilt because we think it helps us. We choose death because we think it saves us. We choose all forms of suffering because we think we want it. This is all confusion. When our mind is straightened out and we can finally discern what it is that we're doing and choosing, we'll make a better choice.
Ultimately choosing what is right is very natural because it's very obvious. Whatever it is you perceive to be supportive of you, whatever is true, whatever is meaningful and valuable, you will want. But if you've placed faith in things which are not really these things, you'll gravitate toward death and suffering instead. You'll choose to hurt yourself thinking that you're helping.
Our only task really is sorting out what things are and are not, becoming clear about what is an illusion and what is a reality. About what is of God and what is not of God. About suffering being suffering and not God's will. About death being impossible. About all choices that lead towards misery being a mistake.
Only when atonement remains the only possible attractive direction to move in, the mind will go there.
"The term "right-mindedness" is properly used as the correction for wrong-mindedness, and applies to the state of mind which induces accurate perception. It is miraculous because it heals misperception, and healing is indeed a miracle, in view of how man perceives himself. Only the sick NEED healing. The Soul does not need healing, but the mind DOES."
"Misperception is a BLOCK to knowledge, while ACCURATE perception is a stepping-stone TOWARD it"
"Illness, which is really "not Right Mindedness", is the result of level confusion in the sense that it always entails the misbelief that what is amiss in one level can adversely affect another."
"We have not lost sight of the crucial importance of the reversal of your thinking. The salvation of the world depends on it."
"True denial is a very powerful protective device. You can and should deny any belief that error can hurt you. This kind of denial is NOT a concealment device, but a correction device. The "Right Mind" of the mentally healthy DEPENDS on it."
I'm trying at the moment to get a better handle on how various MIRACLE WORKERS have been able to achieve their states of mind, and gain access to true miracle working power.
Most of these miracle workers are Christians or Catholics, be it Jesus himself or various saints and other notable individuals.
There is something about what they are reading into in the bible that is steering them towards states of saintliness, christ-consciousness, holiness and humility.
I believe there are parallels to some core teachings in A Course in Miracles, and that some of these aspects may not be so readily noticed.
The bible acknowledges that we are in a "fallen state", and have become "sinners."
ACIM would make a small adjustment to say we BELIEVE we are sinners, and as a result a part of our mind has "become evil". This evilness is what we call ego. Many ACIM students do NOT acknowledge that they have this evil ego in their mind and do not want to look at it. But we have to "confess" that we believe evil things, in order to admit to our mistakenness and seek a better way.
The bible would say we are trying to be evil or wicked, and that by doing so we are destined for hell.
ACIM makes a small adjustment to say that we do indeed BELIEVE that we are evil and wicked, which is the "ego" portion of our mind, and by so believing we project and perceive hell. The "devil in us" drives us towards destruction and suffering and death.
The bible would say "the devil" tempts us and plays upon our sins and uses our mistakes against us.
ACIM makes a small adjustment to say our egos produce this temptation, our belief in sin leads to self punishment, and we indeed seem to succumb to ego/devil when we believe in death and destruction. In unforgiveness we demand punishment for sin, and the wages of sin is death. This is because we are unforgiving toward ourselves and others and must purify ourselves of grievances/sin/guilt/fear.
The bible would say that only that which is of God is good and real and true, and ACIM would agree with this.
The bible would also say that we need to purify ourselves of our evil ways, ie repent of sin. ACIM also agrees in the sense that we have to stop believing in separation and sin and guilt. This means we have to own up to the fact that we are "being sinners" by having egos, we WANT to be sinful, and we need have a little willingness "to repent" ie to CHOOSE AGAIN and change our minds. We're not going to do this if we don't have willingness to admit that we WANT to be evil.
In both paths there is an acknowledgement of the fall of man. There is acknowledge that we have entered a state of belief in sin and death. There is acknowledgement that only that which is of God is holy and good. There is acknowledgement that this world is a fallen kingdom and the body is not natural to us. There is acknowledgement that we need to admit to "being sinners" (egos) and be willing to repent (choose again). That we need to become more forgiving and develop faith and trust in God.
In particular, all saints and miracle workers confess to having faith in God, trusting in his power, believing in his laws, and obeying his instructions. There is a great dependency on God, both in terms of carrying out his will, doing the Holy Spirit's work, and also being looked after by God. This is mirrored in ACIM as well in terms of us developing trust, gaining faith, listening to the Holy Spirit, receiving Help and Guidance and Correction etc and learning how to be HEALERS.
Both the bible and ACIM provide a notion of "salvation" from sin and suffering and death. A way to overcome the world. They both focus on resurrection and life. They both lead us toward God and toward spirit and eventually to heaven itself.
I do not see that ultimately, in terms of goals, there is ANY difference whatsoever between the two paths, in terms of their end result. When we become miracle workers we become exactly like this who have gone before us as renowned performers of the acts of God. We become empowered to utilize God's unlimited power, the Holy Spirit works through us, and we simultaneously become purified and holy and innocent and good.
The key to the success of these miracle workers appears to lie mainly in their dedication to the laws and nature of God, their development of faith and trust and dependence on God, their willingness to admit to being nothing without God, their humility and recognition of God as being the source of ALL power, and their great honesty in seeking out and purifying themselves of all devils and egos and evil thoughts within them, and their vigilance for the Kingdom.
A Course in Miracles asks us to do PRECISELY the same, and to become exactly like them.
"You once said that souls cannot rest until everyone has found salvation. This happens to be true. It is the privilege of the forgiven to forgive. The Disciples were officially and specifically told to heal others, as Physicians of the Lord. They were also told to heal themselves, and were promised that I would never leave them or forsake them. Atonement is the natural profession of the Children of God, because they have professed Me."
"You should truly give as you have truly received. The Golden Rule can work effectively only on this basis. "
"...This is the opposite of the Golden Rule, and having placed this rule upside down, the reverse of miracles, or projection, follows automatically.)"
The Golden Rule is simply based on the fact that God creates in his own likeness. The sons he create are all identical to each other and are identical in nature to God. Being identical is what "being one" means.
This means that what applies to one son, applies to all sons. And what applies to any son, also applies to God. The same rules apply equally to all of God's creations, who are all treated equally with unconditional love.
This sets up God's "law" - the Golden Rule - that quite literally, whatever applies to you, applies to others, at all times.
The Golden Rule is always in effect because it is always true. It is even in effect when you go into ego denial and pretend that it doesn't apply.
For example, everything to do with the ego is the denial of the Golden Rule, in which it asserts something different applies to you than applies to others. The ego is the idea of "being different", which is the same thing as specialness.
Being different is of the ego. Being identical is of the soul.
When something seems to apply to one and not another, this sets up the ego's murderous thought system. This means that you believe there is a separation between cause (God) and effect (Sons). Therefore you believe you can cause without experiencing effects, or that there is a separation between giving and receiving. That the Golden Rule does not apply.
This belief is murderous because it means you are attempting to cause someone (who is really your equal), to produce effects in them, while being separated off from those effects, thus "getting way with" murder. This is why "what is not love is murder."
The Golden Rule is always applying, no matter where you are. Even in the dream. Even as the ego attempts to *pretend* that the Golden Rule is not applying, it is applying. And it thus suffers the consequences, because DENIAL of the law does not circumvent it.
That means that, for example, if you attempt to treat a specific brother in a way that is different to others, you are in denial of the law, and MUST experience that how you treat them you are treating yourself. But you will pretend that you are able to treat them a certain way while escaping the consequences. Yet you will NOT escape the consequences.
It is not just a matter of IF you do unto others they will do unto you. Nor is it an optional matter of "treat others as you would have them treat you". Others may not seem to comply or reciprocate. The fact is, you cannot NOT do this. As you treat others, you ARE treating yourself. Directly.
Acknowledgement of the Golden Rule also acknowledges the secret to salvation, that you are doing it to yourself. However you try to see or treat others, you will treat yourself, and so you are hurting yourself when you try to hurt another. And anything they seemed to do to you, you must've done to yourself, because everything is shared equally.
Being in denial of the law does not cause you to escape the law. You can never be outside of the Golden Rule. It is God's law. It is firmly rooted in reality. If you pretend that it doesn't apply to you, it STILL will apply and then you will likely hurt yourself.
Trying to deny the law and act as if it isn't operating, you will do something to others that you think you can get away with, but instead indirectly hurt yourself. You may not realize that you hurt yourself, but you do. Trying to deny the law leads to "karma", or rather, self-inflicted attack. All attack is self attack.
The only way to be happy is to comply with the law. When you do this, the law is really on your side. It treats you well, because it recognizes that you deserve to be treated just as equally as everyone else. It recognizes your divine equality with all beings and that you deserve to be loved UNCONDITIONALLY and fully at all times.
When you operating in alignment with the Golden Rule you are perfectly safe, perfectly loved, perfectly empowered and free from all suffering. It is the recognition that you are as God created you and that all brothers are your perfect equals.
"Healing is an act of thought by which two minds perceive their oneness, and become glad."
You will be glad to recognize that what applies to you applies to your brother. You will be glad to recognize that the TWO of you are identical, and that each of you is equally treated with the same love by God. And you will be glad to see that you both SHARE everything together and have been given EACH OTHER to share WITH each other, that you not be alone, because God does not will to be alone.
And in that identicality, you are "one" - of one kind - with each other, and so recognize and know your brother as yourself.
The Golden Rule is littered throughout A Course in Miracles. It's embedded into and lays the foundation for so many concepts and ways of relating to others. The way that as you treat your brother you treat yourself. Your use of your body to demonstrate to your brother what you think of him. The sharing of minds. Seeing your oneness in him. It's all based on this fundamental principle, to love your brother as yourself.
Get used to this idea. Stop trying to make the world out to be a wonderful great thing that you want to keep forever. It's okay to forgive it and love toward it but in and of itself it is absolutely NOTHING. It is not worth a single thing! All this special-love baloney about how Earth is so special and save the planet and all this bullshit, you're not even supposed to be here.
The body and the world are absolutely worthless. They are not your home, they are not where you belong. God did not create them, and so they are meaningless, valueless, worthless. Putting the body or the world on a pedestal and worshipping it is worshiping false idols. They are not Gods. When you are done with the body and the world you will throw it in the trash and walk away.
The world holds NOTHING that you want. It IS nothing. How can you value nothing? To do so is to completely fail to recognise the world is an illusion. It's not really there to have! You can't keep it, you can't save it, you can't make it mean something it will never mean. You are supposed to forget it entirely and return to heaven. It is VITAL that you recognize the world is nothing. Recognizing this will set you free from suffering.
While we're busy getting excited about all the magical things in the world, all the places you can go, things you can do, stuff you can gawk at, it's all ultimately purposeless until you repurpose it toward awakening FROM it. The world has absolutely nothing to give you, it adds absolutely zilch to God's Kingdom, it doesn't give you any abilities or benefits whatsoever that you didn't already have in spirit, and all it does is limit and take away. Stop making the world into a special relationship. The world is absolutely nothing. There is no world!
"The "self" that needs protection is not real. The body, valueless and hardly worth the least defense, need merely be perceived as quite apart from you, and it becomes a healthy, serviceable instrument through which the mind can operate until its usefulness is over. Who would want to keep it when its usefulness is done?"
Honesty is the basic machinery of awakening. It means you have a willingness to accept what is true regardless of whether it suits your ego or makes you look good. It means putting the truth before your own personal position, and being willing to be seen in its light.
All parts of any forgiveness process entail honesty. You have to be honest to admit to and discern what is true and what is false. You have to be honest with yourself in accepting responsibility for having chosen everything you are experiencing. And it takes a lot of honesty to admit that you are not being victimized by anyone but yourself.
So honesty is really all about putting aside all of the ego pursuits, perspectives, and self-serving and face-saving attitudes, which are really all *lies*, and owning up to what's really going on. It's a matter of owning up to what is real rather than what you want to make of the situation.
Honestly also requires us to surrender every ego activity that we're using to try to win favor or defend ourselves or make ourselves look better. It means being what you really are, admitting to what really is, and accepting reality without you changing it.
Honesty is the best policy, because it is sanity. It is awakening. It is awareness of truth. It is allowing and accepting God's nature and presence. Sometimes it will take for you to really examine what you're doing and why and to have a 'little willingness' to admit the ways that you're mistaken or are trying to deceive. So really it all boils down to... is it really true... is it really factually real and true as in Holy Spirit's truth.... or is it false.
Honesty is the truth. Dishonesty is the lies.
So if we're to wake up to God and truth and reality, we're going to have to be really really really really really completely willingly honest at all times. Otherwise we're kidding ourselves, and fooling ourselves, and deceiving ourselves, and then we are the ones who end up suffering.
In all honesty, we are still as God created us. It we are willing to completely admit and accept that, it's game over for the ego.
Honesty gives you access to the truth which sets you free.
Believing that you sinned, is an attack against YOU, not an attack on whom or whatever you think you sinned against. The sin is against yourself, directed inward. It has no power over God.
Believing you are guilty for that sin is an attack on YOU, not a guilt imposed by whoever you thought you sinned against or how they would judge you, but by your own self against yourself. God does not find you guilty.
Believing in fear because of your guilt is also an attack on YOU, by yourself, not a fear induced by who you sinned against, or because they will retaliate, but a fear that you will deserve your own punishment because of the guilt that you believe you deserve. God is not making you afraid.
Believing in punishment because of your fear is once again an attack on YOU, by yourself, and not an attack coming at you from anyone else for any reason. It is your way to pretend to use others as ways to punish yourself, all the while pretending that you are not the one doing any of it. You are afraid of YOU and your self punishment. God has no desire to punish you and you're doing such a good job of doing it to yourself that He doesn't need to.
You sin against you. You make yourself guilty. You are afraid of yourself. You punish yourself. That's how it goes.
Nowhere in this equation is anyone else involved in any direct causal way without your consent whatsoever. Nobody. Because there is only you, doing this to yourself.
Why are you doing this to yourself?
Hmm?
Are you done with self attack yet, or the fake story that it's everyone else who is against you? The only one against you is you, as your own enemy.
What if you were to stop attacking yourself? What if you decided you are forgiven? What if you realized and recognized that you DID NOT SIN? That your sin did nothing to anyone but yourself? That nobody else separate from you was sinned against, caused guilt, induced fear, or dealt out punishment. What if there is only you and your war with yourself?
The war with yourself cannot be 'won', because then you lose.
Is it time for peace?
The secret to salvation is this... that you are but doing this to yourself!
In terms of there being no order of difficulty in miracles, Jesus is clearly stating that we are to NOT BELIEVE that there are any REAL DIFFERENCES between illusions. A small thing is no different to a big thing. Something that has been there a long time is NO DIFFERENT to something that just appeared. All illusions of form, shape, size, behavior, difficulty, hardness, permanence, all of them must be equally regarded as illusory.
You are to NOT BELIEVE that a rotten apple is any more real than a fresh apple. You are to NOT BELIEVE that a slight sickness is any more or less healable than a major disease. The aim is to learn to disbelieve all illusions, to transcend them, to categorize them ALL EQUALLY AS UNREAL, and thereby completely ignore all APPEARANCES that one thing has properties that another does not have.
ALL illusions are the ONE DREAM. And the one answer to the one dream is a miracle. And all miracles are equal and completely IGNORE all suggestions of orders of difficulty. Jesus even goes as far as to say that raising the dead is NO MORE DIFFICULT than healing a slight sickness. Because in the correct light, they are BOTH recognized as the same NOTHINGNESS, and therefore NEITHER of them has any more magnitude or power or reality. Both are AS EASILY dispelled.
Miracle mindedness sees everything in this world as a totally level playing field, all illusions are equal, all illusions are the same, nothing is more or less difficult and there is no difficulty in dispelling or healing them at all. This is the mindset of a miracle worker. One who sees the entire dream and is not deceived by a single appearance, a single suggestion or temptation, and has absolutely no regard for any stories about what can or cannot happen.
THERE IS NO ORDER OF DIFFICULTY. The hierarchy of illusions is just that, a total fiction. Cancer is NO MORE SERIOUS than a headache or a runny nose. It is by recognizing them ALL AS THE SAME that you become able to DISPEL THEM ALL.
Do you see where this is leading? Away from ALL LIMITATIONS towards being TOTALLY UNLIMITED AND ALL POWERFUL.
"You made sickness and death and therefore can abolish both."
"There is nothing my holiness cannot do."
"I am not afraid but all powerful."