It's helpful to reframe everything in this world as the ABSENCE of something real, rather than the PRESENCE of something unreal. The world ITSELF is not the PRESENCE of a world, is is only the seeming ABSENCE of heaven.

We are very used to labeling the things of this world as if they EXIST, have reality, are true and happening. So we might refer to someone's sickness as if it is the PRESENCE of a sickness. Or we might refer to a hateful or fearful feeling as the PRESENCE of hate or fear.

But this is a form of being deceived by illusions. Fear is not the presence of something, it's actually just the seeming LACK of love. Anything of the ego does not really exist and is only the ILLUSION of the absence of something real, appearing to be the presence of something unreal.

There is a major difference between the absence of something and the presence of something else. The absence of light seems to produce a dark shadow, but the shadow is the not the PRESENCE of darkness. If you point to it and say "its dark there" you are really mistaken. It's just an area where light is less. You could say, it is partly lit there.

Similarly someone who seems evil, is not evil. They are just lacking some love and sanity. They have a seemingly low level of love and sanity. They are trying to lack love, rather than to have the presence of unlove. The ego has come up with a whole set of terms for the opposites to real things and uses them profusely, but this obscures the fact that the absence of something IS NOT the presence of something else.

The whole world and everything in it is merely the LACK OF the presence of something real. Like a hole. You might say a hole in the ground is the "presence of" a hole, but a hole is nothing. It's a lack of earth. When the earth fills in where the hole was, where is the hole? It simple ceases to exist. Similarly when light illuminates a "dark" area, the area becomes flooded with light and the darkness does not exist.

We should reframe everything in terms of ONLY the seeming ABSENCE of something, rather than the presence of its opposite. Because as soon as you believe that there is a PRESENCE of the opposite of real things, you give reality TO the unreal and you make illusions real and you fall for deceptions.

Giving "life" to things that don't really exist, suggesting they are a "something" when in fact all it is is a lack of a real something, produces EGO. It's a way to suggest that darkness actually can CAUSE light to go away, or that the world has REPLACED heaven, or that bodies don't NEED minds, or that death has power OVER life. As soon as you suggest that anything in the illusory world is a SOMETHING that "exists in its own right", you are deceived by illusions.

Flipping from "its a lack of light" to "its a real darkness that exists on its own", is what makes darkness seem real, and have power, and a will of its own, and its own existence. This is what gives the WORLD a seeming existence in our mind. THIS is ego.

This is the belief that illusions are not illusions, or that a lack of love is ACTUAL sin, or that a lack of life is REAL sickness. As if darkness, and sin and attack and sickness and death are ACTUAL THINGS which have EXISTENCE of their own and ARE THERE, fighting against the truth. That they are ASSERTIONS of evil, expressions of death, and actual PRESENCES of real things opposite to God's creation.

Believing this about ANYTHING in this world is being DECEIVED by it and failing to recognize the world IS NOTHING in and of itself. It is ONLY the illusion of the absence of God. And if God were permitted to be PRESENT, his light would shine away the world, his life would raise the dead, his love would replace all fear, and his Kingdom would replace the planet. Earth is ONLY the illusion of the ABSENCE of the Kingdom.

So let's re-frame the world in much more accurate terms.

The world is not the presence of a world, it's just the seeming absence of God's world.

Sickness is not the presence of a sickness, it' just the seeming absence of health and life.

Hell is not the presence of real hell, it's just the seeming absence of heaven.

Bodies are not the presence of actual bodies, they are just an illusion of the seeming absence of spirit.

Attack is not the presence of an attack, it's just the seeming absence of healing and wholeness.

Fear is not the presence of terror, it's just the seeming lack of love's presence.

Guilt is not really the presence of actual guilt, it's a lack of recognition of innocence.

Sin is not really a real sin, it's just the seeming absence of sinlessness and invulnerability.

Death is not really death or the presence of death, it's nothing more than the illusion of a lack of life.

The important thing to realize is that when the PRESENCE of something REAL is supplied, when the light comes and shines in a dark room, when life is given to the dead, the true things REPLACE the seemingly dark things, the true things CAUSE the dark things to go away, and the illusory things SIMPLY VANISH INTO THIN AIR when the LACK they were based on is filled.

And we must also recognize that the things we say "have an existence" but which really are just the LACK OF the existence of something real, do not have any POWER or WILL or ABILITY to deny, resist, prevent, or overpower, the return of the PRESENCE of real things. When the light comes it DOES shine away all darkness and darkness CANNOT remain. The darkness's presence ENTIRELY DEPENDS on light being absent, and when the light comes, it CANNOT STAY. Because it WAS ONLY the lack of light, NOT the presence of darkness.

We can say that the ENTIRE CONTENT of the spacetime continuum, including earth and all galaxies and bodies, all illusions of suffering, are ENTIRELY ONLY the seeming ABSENCE of something real. The absence of GOD. That is all they are. They are illusions of what it looks like when GOD IS MISSING. But they are not the PRESENCE OF an opposite to God. The planet is not a planet, it is the ABSENCE of a world. Death is not death, it is only the ABSENCE of life. When life comes, there is resurrection!

"Miracles supply a lack."

The light comes, darkness vanishes.

When love comes, fear vanishes.

When life comes, death vanishes.

When heaven comes, hell vanishes.

When health comes, sickness vanishes.

When wholeness comes, attack vanishes.

When innocence comes, guilt vanishes.

When immortality comes, sin vanishes.

The world is only an ILLUSION of a world "existing", "happening", "being something", "doing something". It is NOT those things. Believing it IS those things is false perception and it being deceived by illusions. Recognizing it is ONLY THE LACK OF something, taking on an appearance of the "presence of" something different to what is lacking, that you recognize illusions are ONLY illusions. And this sets you on the path to their undoing. In fact Jesus says this is the ONLY way you can correct your mind.

"The ego does not perceive sin as a lack of love. It perceives it as a POSITIVE ACT OF ASSAULT. This is an interpretation which is necessary to its survival, because as soon as YOU regard it as a LACK, you will automatically attempt to remedy the situation. And you will also succeed. The ego regards this as doom, but YOU must learn to regard it as freedom."

"The emptiness engendered by fear should be replaced by love, because love and ***its absence*** (fear) are in the same dimension, and correction cannot be undertaken except WITHIN a dimension. Otherwise, there has been a confusion of levels."

If you believe you are part of a dream, made of dream stuff, you can be attacked. If you recognize yourself as the dreamer of the dream, outside the dream like the container in which the dream is taking place - the mind - then you cannot be attacked.

"If you let your mind harbor attack thoughts, yield to judgement or make plans against uncertainties to come, you have again misplaced yourself, and made a bodily identity which will attack the body, for the mind is sick."

The dream of death, space and time, the world of sin, is all taking place in thought. If you identify WITH this thought, you shift your sense of "who and what I am" away from "that which thinks" to "the thought itself". Away from mind to the dream.

To do this requires that you deny what you are. To deny your soul. Doing this invents perception, and doing it a lot pushes you towards false perception. Here, you believe that since you are a dream, or part of a dream, or made of dream-stuff, the dream ITSELF must be your creator.

This now begins the process of believing that you are at the effect of the world. If you are identified with or as something IN the dream, then you are now vulnerable to anything that seems to take place in the dream. And anything that happens to dream stuff, you will believe is happening to you.

"You are immortal and you cannot die. But you can confuse yourself with things that do."

By confusing your SELF, with dream figures, ie by believing you are a body, and by extension actually believing that you ARE THIS WORLD ("The world is perception"), you position yourself at the EFFECT of the dream, and introduce all manner of suffering into your experience.

If your identity is something OUTSIDE OF space and time, something BEYOND the body, something more encompassing than the dream world itself... if you are the MIND that is dreaming it, or even better, the soul that is using the mind to dream it, then you are FAR BEYOND the reaches of the dream itself.

"You are safe in God, dreaming of exile"

"The Kingdom of God is perfectly protected. Nothing can prevail against it."

"Nothing can prevail against a son of God who commends his spirit into the hands of God."

"For you would not react at all to figures in a dream you knew that YOU were dreaming. Let them be as hateful and as vicious as they may, they COULD have no effect on you, unless you failed to recognize it is YOUR dream."

Believing that you ARE a part of the dream, lands you directly onto the battlefield. The dream is the battlefield. If you are a body, and "the body is a dream", then you will believe that you are fundamentally unsafe, because the body is exposed and susceptible and attackable and limited, in the midst of a harsh and hostile world full of danger.

"Today's idea will eventually overcome completely the sense of loneliness and abandonment which all the separated ones experience. Depression is an inevitable consequence of separation. So are anxiety, worry, a deep sense of helplessness, misery, suffering and intense fear of loss. The separated ones have invented many "cures" for what they believe to be "the ills of the world." But the one thing they do not do is to question the reality of the problem. Yet its effects cannot be cured because it is not real."

Anyone believing they are a body cannot truly feel safe. They must live in fear. To believe you ARE a body requires that you believe you ARE the dream. And to believe you ARE the dream requires you to believe you are at the EFFECT of the dream or dreamer. That you are defined by it. And that means the dream is the cause of you. And being able to cause you with an alien will is an instant threat to your peace.

It can never be, that you can say, "Look at me, I'm a man, I am fearless". And it can never be, that you can say, "Look at me, I am a fierce and powerful woman". By identifying AS a body or a gender identity, or the attributes of the flesh, or the size and shape of its form, or its abilities, you are literally positioning yourself as a target for attack. And this belief in attack is inherent to seeing yourself AS a portion of a dream, and it is your own mind that is doing the attacking because it believes in being affected.

You cannot be "an invulnerable man" or "a bullet-proof woman". But you can be an immortal spirit, a soul, a child of God, who temporarily utilizes the dream body for a higher purpose, and therefore infuses it with life and protection. But this is a miraculous supernatural act, in which a power NOT OF THIS WORLD, from outside the dream (holy spirit), is used to OVERRIDE the physical laws of the dream.

It all hinges around the simple question of identity. Who or what are you? What are you identified WITH and AS? What is your NATURE? Are you made of illusions? Are you a reality? Are you something in space and time? Are you eternal and timeless? And this really boils down to the question or, where did you GET your identity from? Where did your TRUEST NATURE come from?

The answer to that comes down to, who is your father? Or who created you? What is your source? How did you come to exist? Because in that question lies all the facts about THEIR nature, and WHAT they could do in your creation, and WHAT you INHERITED from them. And if the ego is your daddy, then you are a mortal temporary limited fictional character in a spacetime of hell. But if God is your daddy, then you are immortal and permanent and can never be affected by dreams.

"The ego IS therefore a confusion in identification, which never had a consistent model, and never developed consistently. It is the distorted product of the misapplication of the laws of God by distorted minds, which are misusing their own power."

"We said before that YOU are the will of God. His will is not an idle wish, and your identification with His Will is not optional because it is what you are."

"All these things are cherished to ensure a body identification. They are songs of praise to the ego. Do not put your faith in the worthless. It will not sustain you."

"In his complete identification with the Christ, the perfect Son of God, His one creation and His happiness, forever like Himself and One with Him, Jesus became what all of you must be."

"Now are we one in shared Identity, with God our Father as our only Source, and everything created part of us."

"The Son of God is my identity."

"Then I lose myself in my Identity, and recognize that Christ is but my Self."

"The step I take today, my Father, is my sure release from idle dreams of sin. Your altar stands serene and undefiled. It is the holy altar to my Self, and there I find my true Identity."

"You I choose, and my Identity along with You. Your Son would be Himself, and know You as his Father and Creator and his Love."

"Long ago we said this course will teach you what you are, restoring to you your identity. And we have already learned that this identity is shared."

"The idea for today presents a very different view of yourself. By establishing your Source it establishes your Identity, and it describes you as you must really be in truth."

"His brothers share his name, and thus are they united in a bond to which they turn for their identity."

"They do not realize that, to deny God, is to deny their own identity, and in this sense, the wages of sin IS death."

"Choose once again what you would have him be, remembering that every choice you make establishes your own identity as you will see it, and believe it IS."

"But there is need for help beyond yourself as you are circumscribed by false beliefs of your Identity, which God alone established in reality."

"I am not an illusion but a reality."

"Atonement heals with certainty, and cures all sickness."

"The body can be healed as an effect of true forgiveness. Only that can give remembrance of immortality, which is the gift of holiness and love."

Sounds like we need to get a handle on this atonement and forgiveness business because Jesus is claiming it can cure ALL sickness, whether it be mind or body. Sickness is actually rooted in guilt. It's a form of punishment and vengeance.

"Sickness is but a "little" death; a form of vengeance not yet total."

"Sickness where guilt is absent cannot come, for it is but another form of guilt."

When there is sickness, it's really that the mind is sick. A sick mind believes it is guilty. It sees itself guilty because it believes it has really sinned. Its guilt demands punishment and projects attack which attacks the body.

"But sickness is not of the body, but OF THE MIND. ALL forms of DISfunction are merely signs that the mind has split, and does not accept a UNIFIED PURPOSE."

"Sickness is anger taken out upon the body, so that IT will suffer pain." "and made a bodily identity which will attack the body, for the mind is sick."

"Unless the mind BELIEVES the body is ACTUALLY acting out ITS fantasies, it will attack the body by INCREASING the projection of its guilt upon it."

"A broken body shows the mind has NOT been healed."

"The guiltless mind cannot suffer. Being sane, it heals the body because IT has been healed. The sane mind cannot conceive of illness, because it cannot conceive of attacking anything or anyone."

Clearly there is a theme here that physical sickness is a form of guilt resulting from a sick mind. When there is guilt in the mind, the mind conceives of "sickness" and attacks the body with it. The body becomes sick, taking on the form of physical symptoms. And when the mind is guiltless the body becomes healthy because the mind believes in healing, harmlessness and life.

"The Holy Spirit KNOWS that ALL Salvation is escape from guilt."

"It (mind) will be healed of all the sickly wishes that it tried to authorize the body to obey. Now is the body healed because the source of sickness has been opened to relief."

"(Atonement) It takes away the guilt that makes the sickness possible. And that is cure indeed. For sickness now is gone, with nothing left to which it can return."

"There is no place where holiness is not, and nowhere sin and sickness can abide. This is the thought that cures."

"We will not be misled today by what appears to us as sick. We go beyond appearances today, and reach the source of healing from which nothing is exempt."

And we are reminded again that THE HOLY SPIRIT is the healer and the cure. "We will be still and listen for the Voice of healing which will cure all ills as one, restoring saneness to the Son of God. No voice but This can cure."

"Atonement heals with certainty, and cures all sickness. For the mind which understands that sickness can be nothing but a dream is not deceived by forms the dream may take. Sickness where guilt is absent cannot come, for it is but another form of guilt. Atonement does not heal the sick, for that is not a cure. It takes away the guilt that makes the sickness possible. And that is cure indeed. For sickness now is gone, with nothing left to which it can return."

To be clear, sickness is IMPOSSIBLE without guilt. Guilt IS sickness. The sickness of the body - illness, disease, damage, death, is all a form of guilt projected out as a shadow to disguise the guilt in the mind. "Guilt remains the only thing that hides the Father, FOR GUILT IS THE ATTACK UPON HIS SON."

"Minds ARE joined; bodies are not. Only by assigning to the mind the properties OF THE BODY, does separation SEEM to be possible. And it is MIND that seems to be fragmented and private and ALONE. Its guilt, which KEEPS it separate, is projected to the body, which suffers and dies, BECAUSE IT IS ATTACKED to hold the separation in the mind, and let it NOT KNOW its unity."

By associating a person with a body, believing the appearance of flesh and bones is "them", identifying them as physical, and thus making physical sickness a real and blinding deception, the body is confused with the mind. If the body is the mind then the body can cause sickness, which is level confusion and magic.

Thus to heal, the body must not be thought of as that which is truly sick. The body must not be thought of as the person. And the appearance of sickness must be recognized as an illusion covering up the mind's guilt. It's the guilt in the mind that is producing all physical symptoms. The mind is trying to destroy the body, having confused the body for the mind/self, as an attempt to destroy God's son.

In a sense, the notion of someone being "sick", is another way of saying "there's something wrong with you". Like when you accuse someone of "being sick" because of some disgust you have about what they're doing. The physical sickness is an accusation of guilt and corruption, or being dysfunctional and evil, a condemnation and an accusation of sin.

This is why the body is an effect or symbol of the mind, and its really the mind that is causing the body to die. This is why the body itself doesn't really "need" healing because it is just portraying the mind's sickness, and in and of itself is nothing but an image, faithful to its user and his/her intentions. Heal the mind of its guilt and the body MUST follow.

"The body needs NO healing. But the mind that thinks it IS a body is sick indeed! And it is here that Christ sets forth the remedy. His PURPOSE folds the body in His light, and fills it with the holiness that shines from HIM."

"And nothing that the body says or does but makes HIM manifest. To those who know Him not it carries Him, in gentleness and love, to heal their minds."

"Use it to bring the Word of God to those who have It not, and the body becomes holy. Because it is holy it cannot be sick, nor can it die."

"With THIS as purpose IS the body healed. It is NOT used to witness to the dream of separation and disease. Nor is it idly blamed for what it did not do. It serves to help the HEALING of God's Son, and, for THIS purpose, it cannot BE sick."

"Perhaps you do not realize that this removes the limits you had placed upon the body by the purposes you gave to it. As these are laid aside, the strength the body has will always be enough to serve all truly useful purposes. The body's health is fully guaranteed because it is not limited by time, by weather or fatigue, by food and drink, or any laws you made it serve before. You need do nothing now to make it well, for sickness has become impossible."

"I have forgotten what I really am,

For I mistook my body for myself.

Sickness is a defense against the truth,

But I am not a body. And my mind

Cannot attack. So I can not be sick."

Something just popped into my mind on our lovely walk home from the cafe.... there are different LEVELS of forgiveness.

The dream was created through this process:

Separation idea > sin > guilt > fear of punishment > death.

At each of these 'stages' there are different kinds of perceptions and choices being made for different reasons. When we're in the world faced with something that seems upsetting, it's usually an experience somewhere between the last two stages - fear and death. When we apply forgiveness, we tend to work on undoing the projections of fear, and perhaps if we dig deeper we undo some of the projections of guilt as well.

But what I found myself noticing was, I don't often get even deeper into the undoing of sin, or deeper than that - the undoing of the idea of separation.

The idea of separation entails our CHOICE to be separate from God, which was a disowning of responsibility and a desire to be different. If I am to take 100% responsibility for what I've chosen, realizing I've only done this to myself, I have to take my forgiveness ALL the way to that original 'source point' in my mind - the decision to die - to be opposite of Life.

So if I'm mainly caught up in forgiving projections and blame, that's helpful but it's maybe confined to some of the 'lower levels' or more external levels of the mind. I need to go deeper. I need to get to where I can see that I CHOSE everything about this because I wanted to be separate. That's the 'root cause' in my mind. I need to admit that I wanted to deny God and wanted to be dead. That's the pivotal point. To get there I need to make sure I am undoing the layers of fear and guilt but also the layer of a belief in sin and come to realize that this is ALL something I chose to do to myself.

Undoing fear: Seems fairly simple, recognizing we're choosing to be afraid and are projecting causes for it outside of ourselves. I can take that back. But I might still believe someone is guilty, maybe myself.

Undoing guilt: I need to now see that I'm not guilty, or at least that guilt is stemming from a sense of sin. I'm afraid because I feel guilty. Well, I need to get past feeling guilty. And as I get past it I'm going to confront a deeper level - a sense of having sinned. The reason WHY I'm guilty. And that deeper level is going to seem even MORE upsetting to admit to. Layers of fear and guilt are weaker than the layer of sin, which is also weaker than the layer of separation. These surface layers were made to cover up the deeper layers and make them more palatable.

Undoing sin: Now I'm aware that I believe I really did something bad, that it cannot be healed, that it cannot be undone or reversed. Something I'm ashamed of and guilty for. Something that supposedly 'happened'. I need to undo that and get past this perception that it's permanent, unhealable, irreversible and has had a real serious effect. This is digging into the depths of 'what I've done' and the root of my guilt. And this should lead me to ask, why did I sin in the first place? It seems like I as I progress here I should be finding out that I am more innocent, but so far it seems I'm more to blame. But I'm moving past it. It's difficult to admit to guilt, but even harder to admit to sin. The ego says, see, you shouldn't have looked at the guilt because now you've uncovered a deeper darker layer of horror. But we can move past this - we have to. Because underneath the idea that 'we really did this' (sin) is an even darker idea - that we WANTED to be separate.

Undoing separation: Sin can only arise out of some kind of separation idea, which actually is a CHOICE and DECISION to be separate. I must've wanted to sin. I must've wanted to do this, to be sinful. So underneath the sin is a choice. It's the awareness that I DID THIS TO MYSELF ON PURPOSE, for a reason. And what is that reason? Why would I separate? I have to own up to this. I wanted to be separate because I wanted to deny that God exists so that I could have an ego. I wanted to be different. I wanted to be not loved. I wanted to die. If I can't get all the way to seeing that I made this choice, then I am not going to truly be ready to COMPLETELY RELINQUISH it. I need to admit to all of the sorrow that came from this choice, and that the choice was mine. Nobody else was to blame. No-one did this to me. I wanted it. And now I'm realizing it hasn't worked - because sin hasn't really worked - and I'm not guilty, and don't need to be afraid or get punished. I'd rather be happy. I might as well give up, surrender this choice, and CHOOSE AGAIN.

And it's at that point that you actually fully let go of the decision for separation, which dissolves the ego and unifies you with God.

So as I forgive now I plan to remind myself of this - exactly how deep am I willing to go in forgiving? Am I just giving up surface projections or am I willing to get all the way to the CORE IDEA - the death wish - the decision to be without God? And am I willing to let that go. Having let go of all the projections and blame and consequences of ALL the other levels, I should be ready to squarely admit to and own up to this decision, and subsequently choose differently. I'd rather choose Holy Spirit's truth at this point and join with His version of the truth and ACCEPT GOD instead of trying to deny God. ACCEPTING GOD is ACCEPTING THE ATONEMENT.

So it seems that as we dig deeper, we uncover darker and more vicious levels of disaster. First it was palatable fear, then some tolerable guilt, but now it's serious sin and hate, and beneath that - a death wish, a desire to be without God on purpose. That's not easy to want to look at or to admit to. And it can seem like the worst thing you could possibly admit - that I wanted this suffering - I wanted to not be with God. I wanted to get rid of God. Or even as some describe it - a murderous thought - the desire to kill God's son. Pretty heavy stuff! We need to come to admit to this so that we choose differently. If I can't own up to having made this CHOICE then I'm not going to be able to UNDO that choice and choose God/Atonement instead. And if I don't, I will continue to die. It IS a life-or-death decision, although we must remember death is an illusion.

So the choice is up to us. Do we want to accept God again and allow Him to love us, or do we want to keep choosing suffering and despair and lack and destruction? It's up to us.

Trying to wake up from the ego while still having the ego is PAINFUL. We have identified ourselves AS the very ego that we're apparently trying to undo. And even as we take some small steps to undo it, we still retain much of it, and that means all the things we did 'to' it (as it perceives it), we will experience as being done to ourselves. That means we will take all of our attempts to wake up as slaps in the face, like being punched by the truth and attacked by the Holy Spirit.

I remember early on when working with the course especially, the feeling that the Course completely 'ignored' the existence of my ego self, and it sure as hell took that as a kind of huge slap in the face, like being ignored and unacknowledged. That produced suffering.

I also know that early on my understanding of course concepts was too ... unrefined, and full of holes, and too broad, so when I would apply some concepts I would grossly overshoot the mark and come to all kinds of conclusions which was not in alignment with the course. Those false conclusions and implications produced suffering. In particular I remember feeling like we had to 'give up' all of the things we have previously become interested in, like new-age stuff, a love of crystals, healing, various books etc, because - you know, if the world is not real then doesn't that mean we're not supposed to do any of this stuff? And so there was a lot of needless sacrifice, because we did not understand accurately enough.

It's kind of like we are attached to (identified with) this big lump of darkness and we're trying to rid ourselves of it, but at the same time, because we are doing basically both things at once - keeping it and tryin to remove it - we can't help but be in CONFLICT. Some people refer to it as "having feet in two canoes". One canoe seems to pull us one way, the other pulls us another. We want to wake up, but we sure as fuck don't. We want more truth, but we sure as fuck don't. We want to keep doing the Course, but we sure as fuck wish we would just stop the fucking thing. It's always like two steps forward, one step back, and we kind of can't help it.

If we could fully step out of the ego and stay out of it, we wouldn't have this problem. But the problem is we are very attached to it and still believe a lot of what it says. Push me, pull you. We yearn for truth in one direction, then the 'rest of us' pulls us in the other direction.

The ego interprets the truth as an attack. The ego sees the Holy Spirit as an enemy. It absolutely does not want to wake up, and the part of us aligned with it does not want to either. I mean, that's just honestly the case with most of us. We want it, but we don't. And every time we are exposed to some truth, part of us is like - oooo, ahhhh, I love this, I feel so light and happy, and then the other part of us which is holding on to ego is like. .. What the fuck are you doing man, that's totally bullshit, it's offensive, it's hurtful, there is no way you can accept that, you should get away from it.

This is the entire foundation for the 'ego rebound'. It is not just a simple backlash or retaliation. It is the parts of YOU that do not yet want to let go of the ego, even though there seem to be parts of you that do. It's the part of you that still believes you are a body. It's the part of you that truly believes that the ego is telling the truth and is your friend and savior. People DEFEND who they believe is their true savior with great vigor. The viciousness of the ego is entirely justified given how much it believes God is NOT the truth.

So as we take these steps toward awakening, we will continually experience that it is NOT what we want, and that exposing ourselves to light is literally killing us. And everything in us that believes the truth is NOT true, and that God is evil, and that Holy Spirit will destroy us (which can be a huge thing), will kick and scream and resist and run away and try to hide. It does this by RESISTING THE TRUTH. It is a resistance against awakening, but the ego sees it as a resistance against annihilation. To it, it is just self-preservation. It sees its motive as PROTECTION. It thinks it is completely justified and that stupid Holy Spirit should shut the hell up.

This resistance produces defenses, and its main defense is to try to make you even less awake by forcing extra unconsciousness onto you. It wants to dumb you down and numb you to the truth and pull you back into hell. It figures you are SAFER there. So the ego literally applies a kind of 'arrest' on the mind, a restraint, a contraction, a limitation, a blockage, as if you are literally trying to 'get away from' the truth and to withdraw from it into the body. These 'defenses' are what WE call 'sickness'. They are barricades against the truth. We think we NEED them because they are protecting us. We are just scared and confused and think that they serve us and that if we didn't have them, we'd be in danger. So there is no need to think of yourself as guilty for having sickness, it just means that you are confused about what the truth is and you currently are perceiving it as something you don't want. You could ONLY experience it as something you don't want if you are mistaken - ie still believing the ego's interpretation.

As the course says (quoted in earlier post) all sickness is the result of resisting awakening. We want to wake up, but we don't. And if we push ourselves to try to be awake too fast, i.e. before we are truly ready and willing (i.e. we can see clearly enough), we will dig in our heels and try to stop it from happening. That just means we need to take a break and go slower. It's ok to do so.

But the fact remains, trying to wake up is a minefield. We do not understand what it means, we resist it naturally, we think we need protection from it, we attack ourselves to defend ourselves from it, and we come to all kinds of misunderstandings which inflict pain and suffering in our lives. Waking up is therefore not exactly EASY, because we keep ping-ponging all over the place trying to settle on what the truth really is. It's a struggle. It's upsetting. It's painful. And we are bound to make a LOT of mistakes. But we will get there eventually.

When there are ego beliefs which say, there is some truth to something opposite to God's truth, you will not be willing, ready, or able, to accept atonement.

You'll want to accept it but there will be something in you which objects or nags or gives you a sense of suspiciousness, that something just isn't quite acceptable or true about God's truth. No matter how plainly clear God's truth is, how clearly presented, or how obvious, the ego STILL distorts perception and can't quite see it squarely, suspecting there is some kind of deception going on, which is its own.

This is why the ego ranges from suspicious to vicious. At best, it does not quite agree with God, and so has this in-built fear and doubt that makes it "not believe" what the truth is saying. This is because it believes something else and has loyalty to something else.

What needs to happen in your mind is that you undo ALL beliefs which are false or saying something out of accord with God's truth/will. Until you do that, you will not be willing to accept the truth.

So if you have a belief that you are afraid and fear is real or fear causes something or you can't stop the fear, there is no way you are going to be willing to accept God's truth. You won't be able to see that it makes perfect sense, or that there is no other reason NOT to accept it.

So then you have to look at the fear and recognize why its an illusion, recognize it as false, unfounded, non-causal, and the fact that it is actually an EFFECT of something deeper. Fear covers up guilt and makes guilt go unconscious, and is being caused BY guilt.

So you have to then dig out the guilt and make it conscious and then do the same thing. You have to come to recognize and accept that the guilt is not true, it's a lie, you're not really guilty, the guilt isn't causing anything, it's just an effect of a belief in sin. Guilt is denial of sin.

Same thing applies to sin, it has to be uprooted and examined, and its at this point that you are bringing into question whether something even happened at all. If the sin occurred "in reality" and thus this world is reality, then you can't let it go. But if you can recognize there is no sin because whatever seemed to happen was an illusion in a fictional world, you can recognize the sin did not happen in REALITY, only in a dream, and thus is not a "real sin". This allows you to let go of the belief that you are sinful.

Once you've got your mind and BELIEF to the place where you recognize that "it makes sense" to you, that you have not sinned in reality or against God, and therefore no REAL effects can have happened, it simply LOGICALLY justifies to you that you MUST therefore STILL BE INNOCENT.

You have to get to that point logically and in terms of it making sense to you, for you to believe that this is correct, accurate, and truthful. THEN, it is absolutely effortless for you to see that God's truth makes sense. That means, you will now be not only ABLE to accept it, but also WILLING to, simply because you don't see ANY other reason not to, and your reasoning (truth) has set you free of all the contrary opposing beliefs. You basically run out of excuses or beliefs as to "why you shouldn't".

This makes you able to accept, fully, and embrace, the atonement. The atonement means nothing happened, you are still as God created you, God still loves you, you did not DO anything at all in reality, there hasn't even been a real sin, you MUST still be innocent, and therefore you MUST BE WORTHY of God's love. This makes it possible for you to ACCEPT that God loves you and RECEIVE HIS LOVE. Acceptance is receiving. What you accept you will receive into your mind and it will be REALITY to you.

Your accepting of this truth without any objections or counter-arguments, allows you to RECEIVE LOVE, and therefore this is what it means to RECEIVE A MIRACLE. This reception also means, since you are willing to recognize that you are WORTHY of being loved, that you also recognize that EVERYONE is ALSO worthy of being loved.

So your willingness to receive atonement/truth/love entails the automatic extension of that worthiness to everyone. And this is also why your receipt of the atonement, the receiving of miracles, puts you in the position of BEING PART OF THE ATONEMENT ITSELF, and therefore you now have received miracles and CAN GIVE MIRACLES TO OTHERS. "You can only give the miracles you have received". To really RECEIVE a miracle requires acceptance and willingness to receive God's truth, even for a moment.

You then are an expresser of the atonement, of God's will and God's love, to others, to help others to also get to the atonement through miracles and correction and teaching. And this is your FUNCTION at that point. It is everyone's function to become part of Jesus's atonement plan and to then be an ACTIVE WORKER in the world helping to demonstrate the truth is true through miracle working. There is much "work to do" at that point, in the "Great Awakening" or "Great Crusade" as Jesus calls it.

So this can only happen for you when you are willing, ready, and able to accept the truth, to see that it makes sense to you and therefore to logically have no other reason NOT to. This is why all other opposing ego beliefs have to be let go first.

As a special final note, I want to make it clear that you do not have to undo ALL of the ego in order to accept "some" atonement, or to receive a miracle. "One moment of love without fear is all that is necessary that all this occur" even if fear returns afterwards (paraphrasing).

You can for example, if you are working on a specific issue, e.g. maybe you are forgiving a parent or an abuser or something, you can undo all beliefs surrounding it and go ALL the way to the atonement principle with it, accepting God's love. You WILL be able to experience SOME measure of love and worthiness, and will therefore be able to receive SOME healing. And this WILL give you a miracle, and you WILL become able to give this miracle to others at that point, even if you still have OTHER seemingly separate issues to undo. There are obviously some limits to this but the first time I did this Jesus told me, "you can perform miracles now."

The final atonement happens when you have basically atoned on ALL issues and have no ego left whatsoever.

Atonement is also the same thing as forgiveness, so when you are "applying forgiveness", you really SHOULD be taking it ALL the way to the atonement and accepting and receiving God's love at the end, otherwise you are not doing a COMPLETE forgiveness.

You always have free will. Your mind always has the power to change anything. Your thoughts influence the body and the world. You can change your relationships at any time. You are not tied down in a rollercoaster ride as a passive observer of some prerecorded movie.

That said, there is an atonement plan. Sometimes referred to as a "script". But beware this term, because a script is not a performance. It's an outline of arranged proposed situations and encounters and happenings which is still partly open-ended so that it's up to the individual actors how they operate within that loose framework.

In course terms for example "those who are to meet will meet", because they have the POTENTIAL for a holy relationship, but may or may not use it for a holy relationship. People are brought together in ideal teaching/learning dynamics, to learn lessons and so on, but not so that they are forced or coerced or have no say in the matter. Everything is always consensual.

Now, consider that the course says "I place the future in the hands of God." And consider also that "those who are to meet will meet." Consider also that the time of your awakening is set, and the Holy Spirit gently orchestrates all events in order to lead to you eternal life. There is a curriculum, but the time you take it is up to you. There are also no accidents in salvation.

"What could you not accept, if you but knew that everything which happens, all events, past, present and to come, are gently planned by One Whose only purpose is your good?"

"Therefore, the plan includes very specific contacts to be made for each teacher of God. There are no accidents in salvation. Those who are to meet will meet, because together they have the potential for a holy relationship. They are ready for each other."

If you recognize that the Holy Spirit has a big-picture plan, and you WILL meet those that you are meant to meet, there is a DEGREE of predetermination in your future. Your life path and mission in this lifetime, your lessons that you agreed to before you incarnated, also play a part.

"Your passage through time and space is not random. You cannot but be in the right place at the right time. Such is the strength of God. Such are His gifts."

So through God's strength, and through the Holy Spirit's atonement plan, various things are "set" to occur, various encounters are going to happen, various people are going to be met, and you are going to arrive at certain lessons.

After all, imagine if it had been designed that you were meant to meet the love of your life and get married for a long term relationship .. but through some randomly chaotic pointless bullshit you did not meet that person and did not experience any of the lessons you were supposed to experience with that person. God doesn't leave things up to such chance when the relationship is carefully chosen as a perfect balance conducive to learning.

If it's in the plan for you to meet a person, you WILL meet them. The dream events will be arranged and manipulated by Holy Spirit and Jesus, even rearranging space and time, in order to make sure that the encounter happens. The dream is malleable and the world is not objectively real. It is easy for them to steer events, inspire thoughts, create impulses and inspirations, and directly alter the world, to nudge everything in its right direction so that the plan does happen.

This doesn't mean you're totally stuck or that you have to go along with something or that you will even necessarily learn from it if you choose not to. It doesn't mean your freedom is taken away or that you can't influence anything, or that even your thoughts are predestined to the extent that you have no power at all. You are always a willing participant, a student, who is simply going through an agreed-to obstacle course of consentual happenings so that you MIGHT make progress.

What this does mean then is that you should recognize that there are going to be some things happening in your future which are "planned". There are some people that you are going to meet. There are some events which are going to transpire. As though the universe itself is colluding to make sure things unfold as they are supposed to.

That being the case, if it's true that you are scheduled to meet certain people and do certain things and experience certain lessons, then you should relax and TRUST that this is for your highest good. You should "go with the flow" and recognize that you ARE always in the right place at the right time, and you are where God "wants" you to be. That you are being guided, prompted and gently manoeuvred by loving hands to put you in touch with the right encounters at the right time, for the purpose of atonement.

And in seeing this, you can then cease a lot of the egoic behaviours. Such as trying to plan everything, trying to figure out what to do, fantasizing about who you might meet or what they might be like, trying to make all decisions on your own, trying to predict what's going to happen, and trying to run the whole show yourself. You can put the future into the hands of God and let him orchestrate your life.

You have to therefore make room for God and for his plan, to not interfere with it, and instead to be a willing participant in the happenings. Going where you are directed, performing the miracles you are instructed to perform, learning the lessons that have been carefully designed for you, and so on.

It means letting go of all the tight control and fear and resistance against what's happening. You are where you are because you're supposed to be, and there are people you are going to meet whether you think you will or not. You can't mess this up, unless you want to interfere with it. And you are always free to procrastinate.

"Free will can temporize, and is capable of enormous procrastination."

So ultimately yes, there is a certain kind of destiny, a plan, a script, to help organize your life and passage through spacetime, for the highest purpose. But at no point are you forced against your freedom to have be stuck or having no wiggle room. There is always room for your own freedom to express itself. And indeed it is always up to you to determine what you make of it.

Ultimately this leads to the reawakening of your true freedom, your unlimited power, and at that point you don't need a script anymore. But you will be of service to spirit, following the will of God and doing the Holy Spirit's work in the world while it's needed.

"It is impossible that anything should come to me unbidden by myself. Even in this world, it is I who rule my destiny. What happens is what I desire. What does not occur is what I do not want to happen. This must I accept."

"For you can be AWARE of what you cannot see, and it can become compellingly real to you, as its presence becomes manifest THROUGH you. Do His work, for you SHARE in His function. As your function in Heaven is creation, so your function on earth is healing. God shares His function with you in Heaven, and the Holy Spirit shares HIS with you on earth."|

"I place the future in the hands of God."

"ALL miracles mean Life, and God is the giver of Life. He will direct you VERY specifically."

"Everyone who is sent to you is a patient of yours."

"And bring with you all those whom He has sent to you to care for as I care for you."

The sight used by the physical body, based on seeing photons, is not a forgiving sight. The body is completely 100% biased because it only ever says that things like itself exist. If the body can see itself, this registers as "bodies exist."

So now you have a sensory device which you might think is able to be objective, trying to use it to tell you whether something exists or not, but the dial on it is switched entirely to one side so that it only EVER reports that physical things exist.

In turn, it is 100% completely blind to anything real, anything of God, and any part of actual reality. It can only EVER say that the physical things it senses must be there to sense, and so they exist and are real and true. ie if you can see it, it's real.

The body is completely biased because it uses its own senses to sense whether it itself exists. And it only ever reports "yes", that it exists, because it senses itself. This is obviously completely tainted information, 100% closed off, biased, and blind.

So basically anything that the body can sense, does not exist. But the body is only capable of saying that it does. It is 100% on the side of the physical, and validates the physical, and is squarely focused only on the physical. It is incapable of finding that the physical world is unreal, and it is not able to sense reality AT ALL.

"Only the body makes the world seem real." UrU5A5

"The body's eyes are therefore not the means by which the real world can be seen, for the illusions that they look upon must lead to more illusions of reality. And so they do." UrU5A2

"The body's eyes see ONLY form. They cannot see BEYOND what they were MADE to see. And they were made to look on error, and NOT see past it." UrT22D5

Literally, the physical body was made to NEVER see reality, to ONLY look upon error, and to COMPLETELY "believe" that everything it senses really exists. It is the perfect device for deception, for making sure you are completely stuck in unconsciousness, for making forgiveness impossible, and for proving that everything impossible is possible.

In effect, we made the body in an attempt to deceive ourselves COMPLETELY. And this makes the body 100% unforgiving. It cannot be objective, it cannot question whether the physical world is real, and it has absolutely no way to see actual reality. It is a "device for separation", NOT a device for oneness.

It is unforgiving in that, anything it sees is an illusion, and that illusion registers as 100% real. It sees illusions as reality and reality as an illusion. That is false perception. That is total insanity. That is total confusion. Sin is insanity, which is why the world of bodies is made of the idea of sin.

Anything that occurs in the physical world, which is "the world of sin", is regarded as a REAL SIN. Something happens, it registers as having happened, the body witnesses the physical proof that it happened, and regards this as irreversible truth. I can see it, I can touch it, I can smell it, taste it, hear it, it is RIGHT THERE, screams the body.

Physical sight, if it were believed without question, would result in the mind being completely convinced by death and destruction and sickness and suffering. Anything that occurs would be regarded as real and true. All physical causes and effects would prove separation is real. Every physical attack would be seen as real and undeniable, justifying revenge. There is no forgiveness there. It is the "battlefield."

Now, a lot of how you experience this illusory world depends entirely on the mind and its USE of the body, the mind's belief system or thought system, and whether it BUYS INTO the deception of the physical world. What MEANING it gives to the signals coming in from the body, whether it believes they are true or not.

If the mind thoroughly deceives itself by aligning its identity with the body, narrowing itself to the body, imprisoning itself in it, seeing itself as "separated off" by it, believing the body IS itself, and as such shutting out the mind, then the mind is going to become UNFORGIVING. In the extreme, this "nihilism" of believing that "the physical world is all there is" would produce a state of total insanity.

This is because physicality IS deception and believing in it means you are deceiving yourself, and deception is evil. Which essentially means that the physical world and the body are evil. Or at least were made in an attempt to be evil, to oppose the "good" of God. But whether it is experienced as hell-like or heaven-like depends on the mind's USE of it.

So basically the body itself presents a POTENTIAL which, in and of itself, is 100% wired for unforgiveness. But the mind can OVERRIDE this, by changing what it makes of the signals it receives from the body. The mind is responsible for whether it BELIEVES in what the body is showing it. And the mind HAS to be willing to categorize EVERYTHING the body senses as FALSE, if it is to be sane and forgiving.

"The body's eyes will continue to see differences, but the mind which has let itself be healed will no longer acknowledge them. There will be those who seem to be "sicker" than others, and the body's eyes will report their changed appearances as before. But the mind will put them all in one category - they are unreal."

As the mind moves towards God, therefore, it moves away from physical sight. It recognizes that everything the body senses is NOT TRUE. This means forgiveness is an assertion that the physical world IS NOT TRUE, which dismisses all deceptions and blame.

But mind can "use" the physical for a higher purpose, e,g, to help others who are in the physical world. But in the mind, it is not buying into, believing, or being deceived by, anything in the world.

What this ultimately means for FORGIVENESS, is that to be truly forgiving you have to NOT believe anything the body tells you, NOTHING that the physical world presents, and recognize it for the illusion it is. As we "practice" forgivenesses we are trying to get our minds to move into that higher "true perception", where we properly recognize the physical as FALSE. In its entirety.

It's then like the body is a sensor dipped into a completely false illusory unreal world, picking up signals about what's going on there, and reporting back, but the mind that looks AT these signals is not deceived by them, does not believe they are ultimately true, and recognizes their falsety. It can still USE the body's signals temporarily, e.g. such as when Jesus walks the Earth and can use the body to SEE the sick bodies, to offer help, but the healed mind does not BELIEVE anything it's witnessing here.

And that's because everything physical is unreal. And forgiving the physical causes it to cease to seem to exist, overriding the body's insistence that it does.

"God's teachers choose to look on dreams a while. It is a conscious choice. For they have learned that all choices are made consciously, with full awareness of their consequences. The dream says otherwise, but who would put his faith in dreams, once they are recognized for what they are? Awareness of dreaming is the real function of God's teachers. They watch the dream figures come and go, shift and change, suffer and die. Yet they are not deceived by what they see." UrM13A6

"Yet sights and sounds the body can perceive are meaningless. It cannot see nor hear. It does not know what seeing IS; what listening is FOR. It is as little able to perceive as it can judge, or understand, or know. Its eyes are blind, its ears are deaf. It can NOT think, and so it cannot HAVE effects." UrT28F4

"Sin gave the body eyes, for what is there the sinless would behold? What need have they of sights or sounds or touch? What would they hear or reach to grasp? What would they sense at all? To sense is not to know." UrW250W41