When I read in the course that anger is an attempt to make someone guilty, I didn't at first relate to it. I had to stop and look at what happens, what I'm doing, when I get angry toward someone.

And that didn't typically happen all that often, but when it did I noticed it was true, what I was basically doing was trying to reinforce "how guilty" someone was. I was trying to MAKE them be guilty.

In anger there's this attempt to amplify the "guiltiness" of someone. And it's not even really tied to what they appeared to do or the severity of it. We could just be going to town raging at them way beyond what anything calls for. Probably convinced that whatever "sin" they committed is the REASON WHY the anger is justified.

But then the second insight is that in order to make someone BECOME guilty, we actually have to put guilt ONTO them. A guilt that they do not have initially. Where does that guilt come from? We actually provide it ourselves, and hurl it towards them through projection.

So then we see that anger is really "what it feels like" when you are hurling guilt. The whole intensity of it, the enforcement of it, the sense of righteousness, the pushing and forcing, it's all designed to "hurl" and "transmit" guilt onto the person.

But then this also gives rise to a third insight, that if we are hurling guilt at people, and it's not their guilt, then we must be reaching inside of ourselves and finding some guilt there, in order to have something to hurl. So that means... drumroll... we're really the ones that we think are guilty.

In addition this means that the "reasons why" we claim we're being justified in anger are false - it's not because of what someone else did, we're angry because of what we believe WE did. We are accusing them of our own sin and guilt, so that we can try to make ourselves feel better and deflect attention away from the darkness within. This is why anger is never justified and you are never upset for the reason you think.

So if we're the guilty ones, it basically means we're angry at ourselves and have attacked ourselves first. And if we hadn't done this, if we hadn't manufactured a whole stockpile of guilt, we'd have nothing to hurl at other people. We wouldn't be able to FIND other people to be guilty of anything.

This then leads to the fourth insight, that if we were to undo all of our guilt within ourselves, we would never have to even lift a finger to try to find others innocent. We'd automatically be innocent within, and would look out from this innocence upon others and find them innocent also. We'd never be angry, never project blame, and would just be happy all the time.

"I am never upset for the reason I think." UrW5

"ALL anger is nothing more than an attempt to MAKE SOMEONE FEEL GUILTY, and this attempt is the ONLY basis which the ego accepts for special relationships. Guilt is the only need the ego has, and, as long as you identify WITH it, guilt will remain ATTRACTIVE to you." UrT15H10

"Anger is NEVER justified. Attack has NO foundation. It is here escape from fear begins, and will be made complete. Here is the real world given in exchange for dreams of terror. For it is on this forgiveness rests, AND IS BUT NATURAL." URT10G1

Denial denies that the truth is true.

Denial attempts to make something else be true, which is false.

Denial is a lie.

Denial is essentially the only ego device. It is another word for separation - the attempt to make the truth go away, to get rid of God, to kill of God's Son, to go unconscious.

You have to own up to and admit to everything, and that is an act of surrender. To stop denying the truth is to surrender or give up the ego position of fighting against it.

In the example of someone who has committed a crime but who is denying that they did it, until they are willing to surrender and stop hiding from the truth, they will maintain denial as a defense. To give up that denial is to admit the truth, which means surrendering to Authority. In the world this usually means the authority of others over them, to decide their fate, but psychologically is means surrendering to the Authority of God, which is a blessing.

Denial then is an authority problem, where you are attempting to have authority over the truth by redefining what it is and making it be something it is not. It's your ego's attempt to assert itself and make itself valid. To surrender to the truth, to God, is the undoing of the authority problem, the relinquishment of the ego, and is a rejoining of mind in wholeness.

To put down denial is to open up to God, to receive love, to accept reality, and to return to sanity. It means admitting that there is nothing you can do to make the truth be something it isn't, and to gladly accept it and welcome it as it is. That doesn't mean accepting that the world is real or that things in the world really are happening. That's not the truth. It means accepting that this world doesn't exist because God did not create it, and being untrue means there is no reason to be upset about it.

You cannot change the fact you live forever. You cannot undo eternal life, because it is immortality. Spirit is in a state of grace forever and has never changed. But you can deny it. You can pretend it is not true. You can try to avoid it, you can make-believe it isn't real, and you can weave illusions to try to make it seems like it isn't true. You can try to invent death and make death seem to happen. But you cannot kill what God created. Death isn't real and it never will be.

To die is to deny Real Life, and death is just a state of heavily denying what the truth is. Death therefore cannot be the truth, and must be reversible if you are willing to surrender the illusion of lies. Death, being denial, cannot be considered a true state, a final state, a whole state. It requires considerable effort to maintain, and cannot last. Like all things made without God, it has a limit to what it can seem to do. That is why the Spirit escapes it, and why we then have more lifetimes.

You can deny the truth up and down and left and right and pretend to be something you are not and try to die in every way imaginable, pretending you deserve it and make-believing it is justified, but it is always a state of lies. You simply are not being honest. The honest truth is that God has created you eternal and you cannot die and this world does not exist. So, what is there to be concerned about? Why pretend you are vulnerable? Why attempt to make out that you can be attacked? You are immortal spirit.

Here's something that is very radical to many people. And this will sound crazy and ridiculous. But here is a fact.

Anything that seems to happen in this world is taking place in a dream, has NO REAL CONSEQUENCES, and does not cause anything to really happen. Ever!

Mind... "It dreams of time; an interval in which what seems to happen (ANYTHING YOU DO) never has occurred, the changes wrought (sins you commit) are substance-less, and all events (every consequence you seem to cause, ANYTHING that occurs) are nowhere."

Sin occurs in this world, through the body. "The world of bodies is the world of sin, for only if there were a body is sin possible."

And this means, any SIN that you committed here, through your body, anything you DID TO SOMEONE, anything that you "hurt", any damage you inflicted, anything you CAUSED here, any mistakes you made, any names you called people, any arguments you had, any attacks you perpetrated, anything murderous you committed, any crime, any hateful relationship, any accusation, ALL OF IT... HAS NOT HAPPENED IN REALITY.

This leads to a simple fact, relating to your HEALING. A REQUIREMENT for healing, remembering that only the ATONEMENT can be said to truly CURE you of this sense of "I sinned"....

YOU WILL NOT be able to LET GO of WHAT YOU DID IN SPACETIME, UNTIL you are able to recognize, believe, and accept, that you DID NOT DO what you think you did.

This truth flies in the face of everything that your senses are telling you. It flies in the face of all evidence, all proof, all consequences. It flies in the face of the ramifications, fallout, consequences, chain reactions, effects, and all outcomes that seemed to be set in motion "because of what you did".

It literally means that you MUST DENY, WITH TRUTH, that you DID what you think you did. You MUST DENY all of the consequences and all "proof". This is where it becomes radical and seemingly ridiculously crazy, because in order to accept the ATONEMENT truth that THERE IS NO SIN, or that NOTHING HAPPENED, you HAVE to IGNORE all of this so-called "evidence".

In fact, you have to get your mind to the point where you recognize that "what you did" (sin) in space and time, in the past, or what you are doing now, IS NOT HAPPENING and DID NOT HAPPEN IN REALITY. Because this world IS NOT REALITY. This world has to BE not reality, IN ORDER FOR the atonement to be true. Because you can't be accepting that what bodies do is REAL and expect to escape from sin. It's impossible!

You MUST not believe in anything that has happened in this world otherwise EVERYTHING that "has happened" is the literal unquestionable, irreversible sinful truth. If bodies and what bodies DO is real or has any truth in it, it CANNOT be undone. If bodily activities have REAL consequences, real effects, the body is CAUSAL. Which makes sin real. Anything the body does is effectively sin, even breathing. It must be recognized as NOT REAL otherwise sin becomes real.

The body and its sins were the entire device by which we TRIED TO MAKE SIN REAL. We made bodies in order to have something to attack WITH. Bodies attacking bodies, sinning against bodies. We made bodies in order to try to prove that SINS HAPPEN. That sins produce PROOF and EVIDENCE that "something happened". Something you can look at with the body, and point to with the body's finger, and label as "THAT EVIDENCE PROVES THERE WAS A SIN". The world's entire "legal" system is based on this lie.

So it's very radical but until you can get to the point where you recognize and correctly frame your DEEDS as "DID NOT OCCUR IN REALITY"... that NOTHING REAL was threatened, that reality has not been hurt or damaged or caused BY you, you will find that you CANNOT LET GO. You won't be able to let go of a feeling of guilt, inferiority, unworthiness, shame, fear etc. In fact, until this is accepted fully and completely we cannot let go of death.

The atonement CURES. FULLY! It literally ERASES all trace of sin and death and makes them IMPOSSIBLE. And "only atonement can be said to cure." It is a REAL CURE, because it uproots the ENTIRE "event" that you think happened. It recognized, AS FORGIVENESS, that what you think you did YOU DID NOT DO, IT DID NOT HAPPEN, IT WAS NOT REAL, IT DID NOT TAKE PLACE IN REALITY, YOU DID NOT SIN AND THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES. And therefore, you MUST STILL BE INNOCENT.

This leads to the recognition, and acceptance, and allowance, that GOD STILL FINDS YOU INNOCENT, and therefore that God still loves you! That you ACCEPT GOD'S TRUTH. You will ONLY be able accept the love of God by accepting that you have NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG. Any belief that you sinned, you will hold as PROOF that you CANNOT BE LOVED because you find yourself unworthy of love, because you are not innocent enough. You will reason that God DOES NOT, SHOULD NOT, AND CANNOT love you, because you "really did sin". And "real sin" IS a belief in unforgiveness. Not merely the belief that you DID something, but also the belief that IT CANNOT BE UNDONE.

**MIRACLES** are the movement towards forgiveness, as atonement, which UNDOES what the world of sin testifies can never be undone. This DIRECTLY ties into the fact that you MUST DEMONSTRATE THE ABSENCE OF PROOF OF SIN in order to TRULY believe and live the truth that you did not cause sinful effects. TRUE forgiveness heals the mind, AND ERASES THE EVIDENCE. Proof that "it happened" cannot remain. In the acceptance that you DID NOT DO what you think you did, you are setting in motion the UNDOING of the consequences. The Holy Spirit HAS the power to undo ALL the consequences of your sinful decisions if you will let him.

To set yourself free from GUILT, you MUST accept the CURE of the atonement. You must accept that you DID NOT SIN. Not that you "did something but it wasn't sinful". But rather that you WERE MISTAKEN TO BELIEVE THAT YOU DID IT AT ALL! Yes, this means you must accept that it did not really OCCUR. That any "occurrence" was A DREAM. It was an ILLUSION of a sin "happening". It did NOT HAPPEN in reality and so did not really happen at all. What your BODY told you HAPPENED was a LIE! This requires you to QUESTION even your OWN EVIDENCE, even your MEMORY, even lingering "physical proof", that seems to "tell you" that you really DID do something that you can't deny.

YOU MUST DENY THAT SIN HAPPENED. Sin is impossible! You must deny that you ever DID anything here at all. We are ONLY dreaming of a made up fantasy world in which MADE UP FANTASY STUFF seems to happen. NONE of it is really happening. NO ONE IS GUILTY. NO ONE HAS **EVER** SINNED. All sin is an illusion and a lie. EVERYONE IS PERMANENTLY INNOCENT. Accepting that is the ONLY way to become WILLING TO LET THE SIN GO, because only by recognizing it WAS NOT REALLY SIN will you ALLOW yourself to forgive yourself.

Accepting your innocence is your goal and it will HEAL YOU and set you FREE FROM ALL SUFFERING. This is why accepting atonement is your number one responsibility. It is the only act that FINALLY WORKS. ONLY accepting atonement can truly CURE YOU! It has the power to undo sin and death and restore your IMMORTALITY.

YOU ARE INNOCENT AND HOLY FOREVER. GOD CREATED YOU INNOCENT AND HOLY FOREVER. Accepting that this is TRUE, CURES the separation.

"Thus does the miracle undo all things the world attests can never BE undone (anything you DID!). And ***hopelessness and death MUST disappear*** before the ancient clarion call of life. This call has power FAR beyond the weak and miserable cry of death and guilt. The ancient Calling of the Father to His Son, and of the Son unto his own, will yet be the last trumpet that the world will ever hear. Brother, there is no death. And this you learn when you but wish to ***show your brother that you had no hurt of him***. He thinks your blood is on his hands, and so he stands condemned. But it is given you to ***SHOW him, by your healing***, that his guilt is but the fabric of a senseless dream."

"***Forgiveness recognizes what you thought your brother did to you has not occurred*** (HAS NOT OCCURRED!!!). It does not pardon sins and make them real. It sees ***there was no sin*** (YOU DID NOT DO ANYTHING EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU DID!!!) And in this view are all your sins forgiven. What is sin except a false idea about God's Son? Forgiveness merely sees its falsity, and therefore lets it go. What then is free to take its place is now the Will of God."

"I must have decided wrongly, because I am not at peace.

I made the decision myself, but I can also decide otherwise.

I want to decide otherwise, because I want to be at peace.

I do not feel guilty, because ***the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him***.

I choose to let Him, by allowing Him to decide for God for me."

A tree ... well.... at first a seed, is planted, and there is husk and germ, and then there is sprout, and now leaves, and a stem, and then a trunk with bark, and then flowers are emerging with petals and pollen, and now the emergence of apples with sweetness, and then there is a seed forming in the apple, and the apple falls to the ground, and now there is a seed again which could become a new tree, and on it goes.

So the question then is, what is this thing? Is it a seed? Well, temporarily, but it turns into something else. Is it a tree? Well not entirely, it was a seed at one point. Is it an apple? For a while, but it used to be bark and petals. So what is this thing? What is this so-called organism that just keeps on changing?

Really the whole cycle of what we call life is a temporary mix of things shifting and changing, as though to say, it has no permanent truth. It is never always something, it's always turning into something else. It shifts and changes, and so says it is one thing one moment and another the next. Another word for that is a lie, or untruth. A physical lie.

There is really no absolute truth of this shapeshifting "lifeform", it's one thing one minute and then you come back some days later and it's become something else. It is partly something, but not wholly anything. Bits of parts sprouting here, other parts sprouting there, at first buds and leaves, then flowers and fruits, who knows what it even is.

This is the transient cyclic undependable uncertain (fear) constantly shifting deceptive dishonest delusional system of the physical world. It has no fixed truth, and it presents one thing as true one moment and changes it's "mind" the next. It has no permanent identity, no absolute anything, nothing dependable, nothing reliable, you can't even trust it.

Such a world symbolises the ego thought system, full of illusions, deceptions, lies, shiftings and changes, nothing ever truly dependable or reliable. Always uncertain, an entire system of fear, always uncertain as to what it is or will be, impossible to depend on, undecided in its insanity, committed to nothing, incapable of being. And as physical objects it has become PHYSICAL FEAR. A physical lie, shifting before your eyes. And who knows what it is or was or ever will be next.

The world is a physical version of insanity. A mind solidified into concrete and walls. All its workings the laws of madness. Its entire system one of total uncertainty and deception. An illusion of a world, driven by insanity and rooted in lies. Not one single part of it is eternal or true.

"The world is the symbol of fear."

""A meaningless world engenders fear."

The totally insane engenders fear because it is completely undependable, and offers no grounds for trust. Nothing in madness is dependable. It holds out no safety and no hope. But such a world is not real. I have given it the illusion of reality, and have suffered from my belief in it. Now I choose to withdraw this belief, and place my trust in reality. In choosing this, I will escape all the effects of the world of fear because I am acknowledging that it does not exist."

"The world you see is the delusional system of those made mad by guilt. Look carefully at this world, and you will realize that this is so. For this world is the symbol of punishment, and all the laws which seem to govern it are the laws of death."

"For the present IS forgiveness." UrT17D11

This was an eye-opener for me, that you have to be IN THE PRESENT in order to be forgiving. Not only that, but the state of mind that you're in when you're in the present, truly, without a past, is the forgiving state of mind.

There present is where you have no grievances, because all grievances are to do with the past. What someone did or didn't do in the past, past hurts, old arguments, unforgiven conflicts, things which "happened" - past tense. Without a past you cannot have grievances. This is why "the miracle" and the vision of christ ONLY exist in the present.

This also means that when you move into the present, you have to have let go of the past, and brushed it off, and dropped it. So if you had grievances toward a person, you would have to be willing to completely let that go and "forgive" them ie no longer hold it against them as a sin. Because sin is always in the past, along with guilt, and the ego. Only if THERE IS NO PAST is your brother forgiven.

Without a past you see people as they are now, without any history of faults and failures and offences. Being fully and squarely in the present moment of time, with no concern for the future or the past, that's where you find the light. It's where you find the real world, because it means you're taking a look at "reality as it is now", rather than disappearing off into a dream of memory. True accurate perception requires total present attention.

I don't think I've ever heard anyone saying or teaching that forgiveness has to take place in the present moment. And this doesn't mean that when you "do your forgivenesses" you are doing them now in the present. We are not in the present, typically, most of the time, or when we're reciting lessons or quotes or trying to apply the course. Most of the time we're lost in he past and giving lip service to the STATE of forgiveness.

To really forgive, just as Jesus says that miracles are seen in light and the light is in the present and miracles heal only in the present, your mind has to let go of the whole of the past. In fact it has to let go of time, past and future, to experience a holy instant. Being in the "now" is the only way to be actually freed from all forms of suffering, which are always rooted in the past.

You can't really be forgiving toward someone if you still believe they did something, which doesn't just mean writing off what they did and keeping the idea of time. It means actually getting out of time, out of the past, realising the past doesn't even exist, and being in the present. In the present you are taking a fresh new look at a person, immediately and without a history.

"The miracle enables you to see your brother WITHOUT his past, and so perceive him as born again. His errors ARE all past, and by perceiving him WITHOUT them, you are RELEASING him. And since his past is yours, you SHARE in this release. Let no dark cloud out of YOUR past obscure him from you, for truth lies ONLY in the present, and you WILL find it if you seek it there. You have looked for it where it is NOT, and therefore have not found it. Learn, then, to seek it where it IS, and it WILL dawn on eyes that see. Your past was made in anger, and if you use it to ATTACK the present you will NOT SEE the freedom that the present holds. Judgment and condemnation are BEHIND you, and unless you bring them WITH you, you WILL see that you are free of them." UrT12F5

To be in the present is to be forgiving. You can't have any sense of a record of sins people committed, unless you are focused on the past. When you focus on the past you're not really seeing anything at all because you're looking at something that is not there anymore. And so you lose vision. You regain vision, sight, Christ vision, in the light of the present, when you are here now, aligned with the always-now of eternity.

One of the things about letting go, is to do with willingness. I realised it's about what you "want". If there is a wanting, a desire, it drives you to an attachment.

If you then want something, but can't have it, you'll experience emotional upset, grief and loss. If the thing you want has seemingly gone away, but you still want it, you'll suffer.

For me, for example, my wife has gone from the physical, but there are parts of me that still want her to be here in a body. The part that doesn't want to "let go" or can't figure out what to let go of, is the part that is already committed to pursuing what it wants, and is so into making what it wants "be there" that it is blind to its own ambition.

The part of me that wants the person to be present, wants the relationship, wants the specialness etc, is the part that isn't letting go. After all, you really only hold onto stuff that you want. And it's not easy to let go of "wanting" a person.

So now I find there is a contradiction between what I want and what I "can have". I still want something that isn't available. And that produces a sense of loss and emotional upset.

So what we have to let go of isn't so much the thing itself, but the wanting of the thing. The wanting is a form of control and attachment. What that leads to is having to realise that the wanting is a choice. I have chosen to want something. And as I continue to choose it, coupled with its unavailability, it is making me suffer.

And what that leads to is realising that at some point I have to choose to want something else. Or to stop wanting entirely, if that's possible. And that means choosing away from what I was choosing.

That's not easy to want to choose away from something you are attached to with special love and bodily value, when the rest of oneself is saying that it wants to keep it going. It's like having to deliberately decide to leave a relationship that you see no reason to leave, which isn't easy.

But as usual, what it amounts to is that, if I am suffering, I am doing to it to myself. "I must have chosen wrongly because I'm not at peace."

My wife, in her wisdom, and in our brief discussions mind-to-mind now, has been quite brutally honest and blunt about things. She is far ahead of me on this. She's told me that "we had our time" and, with regards to our marriage, "all those chains are broken now." I attempted to wear her wedding ring around my neck and she told me quite firmly to "take it off". She knows that these are forms of trying to stay attached to specialness.

It's a bit hard to accept that, and not take it as a rejection to the ego, almost seeming as if she doesn't "want me" anymore. But the higher soul perspective is much more detached, much more unconditional in its love, and much more shared. We're all supposed to love everyone, and exclusivity is of the ego.

Thing is, what could we be in "want" of, except something we lack. And who can lack when they are immortal. And what could be wanted except things that aren't real to begin with, and were never real. it gets pretty deep.

No-one wants to let go of what they believe is real, because whatever you value you allow into your mind and it becomes real to you. To let go of illusory things they have to be recognised as having not been real to begin with. An unreal relationship with an unreal body in an unreal world.

"And while you see more VALUE in sleeping than in waking, you will NOT let go of it."

"You do NOT recognize that love has come, because you have not yet let go of ALL the barriers you hold against EACH OTHER."

"I must let it go by realizing that it has no meaning, so that vision may take its place."

"For what you think is real YOU WANT, and will NOT let it go."

"To overlook nothingness is merely to judge it correctly, and because of your ability to evaluate it truly, to LET IT GO."

"You groped but feebly in the dust and found each other's hand, uncertain whether to let it go, or to take hold on life so long forgotten."

"Forgive the past and let it go, for it IS gone."

"No-one would choose to let go what he believes has value."

"Light cannot enter darkness, when a mind BELIEVES in darkness, and will not let it go."

"Everyone should love everyone."

"You cannot enter into REAL relationships with ANY of God's Sons, unless you love them all, and EQUALLY. Love is not special. If you single out PART of the Sonship for your love, you are imposing guilt on ALL your relationships, and MAKING them unreal."

This is a clear message from Jesus. Each one of us needs to get to the point where we love *everyone*, literally. Not a single exception, not a single "type of person", not a single reason why we can't love someone.

Regardless of what political party, regardless of criminal history, regardless of sins committed, regardless of what color or sexual orientation their body is, no matter their personality, no matter how they behave or what their voice sounds like or what foods they like or what team they support.

This is unconditional love. Love without exceptions. Love without special conditions.

If you are a man, a straight man, are you willing to fully love all other men? Including gay men?

If you are in an exclusive marriage, are you willing to love EVERYONE as much as you love your spouse?

Will you love your children as much as your husband?

Can you love all of the neighbors that you disapprove of?

Can you love all celebrities, political leaders, groups, corporations, the military, all war mongers, hitler?

Wherever there are reasons not to, there are reasons not to love yourself. Wherever there is some limit on WHY you cannot love them, there is a limit on why you cannot love yourself. If you cannot be willing to fully express love to every single one of God's children equally and fully, there is a limitation placed on how much love you are willing to receive. Which means you do not love yourself either.

Special relationships are especially prone to exclusion. That one special person, who is better than all others, your favorite, whom you love the most, such that no-one else compares, and everyone else sucks. Can you find the same love everywhere you go, regardless of whether that special person exists?

Can you love another man's wife as much as you love your own?

Can you love another woman's husband?

We're not talking here about having sex with them or getting into an orgy. We're talking about non-physical spirit-based extensions of love through the heart.

There can be no enemies if you want peace. There can be no-one identified as "not worthy of love" if you are to be worthy of love. You can't maintain that someone is wrong or sinful or undeserving. You can't keep separating off one group of people to spiritualize them at the expense of putting another group down.

Jesus loves EVERYONE EQUALLY. Every single person on or off the planet. All the children of God. When there isn't full total willingness to love everyone equally, there is a resistance to loving ANY of them fully. This is why Jesus says if you do not love them ALL fully and equally, you do not really love ANY of them.

If you have a special person or family member that you feel you love a great deal, but you do not love every other person to the same extent, you DO NOT love that special person fully. The love you withhold, the unhealed grievances, the special hate you have for others, must detract from how loving you can be towards a special person. To love that special person fully, you HAVE to love everyone fully. It's the only way that works. In case you didn't notice, you cannot love and hate at the same time.

For those who want to return to Heaven, to God, to unconditional reality without limits, all such grievances must be relinquished. All specialness has to be questioned. All exclusivity has to be transcended. Whether you choose to spend extra time or attention with certain people still, that's up to you. Holy Spirit wants to turn your special relations into holy ones. But to be holy, what applies to that one person must apply to all, including you.

You cannot love others if you do not love ourself. You are also included in this. To have enemies is to be at war with yourself. You cannot get away with it. Maintain enemies and you are not at peace, seeing yourself as under attack. Only when every single person is your friend are you free from this. And to do that you have to be a friend to yourself. You have to be willing to love yourself and receive love from God. When you do, you can then give or extend it. You must be included in this because love is a state of SHARING. It belongs to everyone.

If you see yourself as being victimised in any way, mistreated, not respected, attacked, hurt, threatened, judged, abused, terrorised, not recognised, hated, left out, invalidated, accused, misrepresented, subject to racism or sexism or homophobia, in any other way somehow slighted or offended by anyone OTHER than yourself, they your ego has formed a FACE OF INNOCENCE, and you ARE in heavy denial!

This face of innocence is a facade the ego wears to DENY AND COVER UP the internal guilt, to hide itself from itself in self-hate. The internal guilt is denied, so that it is not even recognised as existing at all within you, and is then projected. It is then seen IN AND AS everyone else other than oneself. It then appears that everyone but yourself is doing something TO YOU against your will that is un-asked for and undeserved.

This projection of guilt and ego frames you as an innocent victim of it in OTHER people, which in turn justifies an angry counter-response - since you see yourself as doing absolutely nothing wrong at all, which points a further finger - a second layer of projection - designed to hide the first, to further reinforce the ways that other people have obviously sinned, been guilty, committed evil acts, failed to live up to standards, or any other way that they are defective.

The "mask" of innocence is worn as a face psychologically, really a disguise, as part of the ego. And it is especially part of the spiritualised ego. Having denied that oneself believes oneself to be guilty - which is still an ongoing internal belief - on sees oneself as "not guilty", and thus innocent. But this is a fake innocence covering up a persistent guilt. The guilt is then projected onto others and associated with them, as though attached to them and part of them.

It is particularly viciously reinforced by an increased level of anger and resentment, as a REACTION to what is now perceived as something other people are doing to you and not you doing to them. The more you feel justified in anger the more you project even more separation and increase the sense of dis-association between you and the guilt. This is designed to make sure it seems that you have nothing to do with the guilt, and it is entirely associated with someone other than yourself. The more this is believed the more unconscious you become as a helpless victim.

What this entails really is self attack, which began long before the projection of guilt. Self and self innocence were denied, producing an accusation against oneself as an attack upon oneself. This is a denial of self as God created you. This is an opinion of oneself - an ego view of oneself - that is far short of the divine holy self that God created you as.

This vicious self-attack produces guilt, inferiority, judgement, self-hate, and various other forms of self destructive behaviour. This is DENIED, which makes it seem largely unconscious or at least disowned and "not part of me". And the result of this is projection. It is given away in order to try to make it not be a part of oneself, or within one's mind. It is seen as "outside" the mind, external to the self (body perimeter), as though literally someone other than oneself, seen as an inherent built-in permanent PART OF someone else. And now it is THEY who are guilty and full of sin.

The result of this is then the formation of a face - a facade - a persona - a cover-up face of innocence, which sees itself AS innocent, but with fake innocence. This fake innocence is shallow and is merely a smokescreen to hide the self-hate that is behind it. Thus self-denying person then believes they are doing no wrong, asking for no harm, doing nothing to hurt others, and are completely benevolent, yet conveniently also are experiencing being "unfairly treated" as a victim. And this of course, if it were true, means anger is completely justified and everyone else should die for THEIR sins against the innocence.

The fact is however that this still remains a SELF ATTACK, because the mind is still hating itself, still believes it is guilty, does not want to admit to this, is IN DENIAL, and refuses to even look at what is being denied. The unwillingness to look at the denied guilt is because of the belief that IT IS THERE, and that it is dark and real and terrible. And the ego DOES believe that you are full of sin. So instead of looking within, it looks without, to find the guilt there instead.

Once the guilt is denied and projected there forms an extremely long lists of all the sins, errors, guilts, mistakes, faults, weaknesses, defects, horrors, and various other forms of unholiness that are regarded as the truth about OTHER people, and not oneself. And THEIR guilt and sinfulness is kept apart from YOURS, so that you are in no way associated with it, and can maintain an illusion of being the innocent one.

Being subject to an incredibly long list of things other people are doing wrong, and thus attacked and victimised BY, is DESIRED AND CHOSEN, so that the face of innocence can be maintained. Even if it seem to hurt oneself to do so, and even if one has to be willing to BE victimised - or so it may appear on the surface - this is ACCEPTED as the natural cost of being able to find someone else to be the fall guy for the guilt.

We even in the extremes are willing to be attacked, hurt, made to be sick, destroyed and killed off, if it will mean that someone ELSE can be accused of sin. And then we can say, "brother by your hand I die." This means that we literally are willing to suffer, be sick, and die, if it means the sick body can accuse someone ELSE of causing it to be the way it is, so that the mind can be exonerated of the sin IT believes it has committed against self, others and God.

But not for an instant does the guilt leave your own mind, not for an instant does your mind truly become healed of it, not for an instant do you escape what is being denied, not for an instant do your accusations of other people's wrongfulness NOT target you, not for an instant do you escape the murderous consequences, and not for an instant do you get away with NOT being hurt by the projections. Yet alone the fact that you then hurt yourself through other people due to the way that you see them as causing you to be hurt, which you want.

Ultimately this means that this whole mechanism is STILL a way of attacking and destroying yourself, of hurting yourself, and that you are doing this to yourself. This is the secret of salvation. Recognizing that it is YOU who is accusing yourself of guilt, it is YOU who is projecting the guilt, it is YOU who is in denial, it is YOU who does not want to admit to wearing a face of innocence, it is YOU who wants to be a victim, and it is YOU who keeps using people to attack yourself. And not once do you really WANT it to stop, because that would mean having to be more honest, stop scapegoating, look within at the guilt, and undo it. Those who are dissatisfied with OTHERS, are incredibly dissatisfied with THEMSELVES.

"Only the self-accused condemn."

"You but accuse your brother of your own sins."

"Projection will ALWAYS hurt you. It reinforces your belief in your own split mind, and its ONLY purpose is to KEEP THE SEPARATION GOING. It is solely a device of the ego to make you feel DIFFERENT from your brothers and separated FROM them. The ego justifies this on the wholly spurious grounds that it makes you seem better than they are, thus obscuring equality WITH them still further."

And if you think you are not condemning yourself and it is only others that are condemning you, you ESPECIALLY are doing this. Your denial can be very strong and it can make it seem like you are not doing anything wrong AT ALL, that you have never chosen or provoked the slightest attack, and it is entirely everyone ELSE on your list of sins that has failed to measure up to God's standards.

Admitting to all this takes a greater willingness to be honest, to stop attacking yourself, to stop hating yourself, to stop projecting blame onto others, to stop believing that other people are the guilty ones, to stop judging others as the ones with egos, and to be far deeper in the willingness to look at WHAT YOU ARE DENYING. Because only by admitting that you are denying how much YOU hate yourself, are you going to ever stop finding a thousand ways to encourage others to hate you FOR you.

Projection of guilt simply keeps the separation going, and the ego absolutely loves that, as it hides behind its wall of "I'm completely innocent, I'm not doing anything to myself." You are trying to destroy yourself. Look at that! And stop doing it.

"The concept of the self the world would teach is not the thing that it appears to be. For it is made to serve two purposes, but one of which the mind can recognize. The first presents the face of innocence, the aspect acted ON. It is this face that smiles and charms and even seems to love. It searches for companions, and it looks at times with pity on the suffering, and sometimes offers solace. It believes that it is good, within an evil world. This aspect can grow angry, for the world is wicked, and unable to provide the love and shelter innocence deserves. And so this face is often wet with tears, at the injustices the world accords to those who would be generous and good.

This aspect NEVER makes the first attack. But every day a hundred little things make small assaults upon its innocence, provoking it to irritation, and at last to open insult and abuse. The face of innocence the concept of the self so proudly wears can tolerate attack in self-defense, for is it not a well-known fact the world deals harshly with defenseless innocence? No-one who makes a picture of himself omits this face, for he has need of it. The other side he does not want to see. But it is here the learning of the world has set its sights. For it is here the world's reality is set, to see to it the idol lasts.

Beneath the face of innocence there is a lesson that the concept of the self was made to teach. It is a lesson in a terrible displacement, and a fear so devastating that the face which smiles above it must forever look away, lest it perceive the treachery it hides. The lesson teaches this; "I am the thing you made of me, and as you look on me you stand condemned, because of what I am." On this conception of the self the world smiles with approval, for it guarantees the pathways of the world are safely kept, and those who walk on them will not escape.

Here is the central lesson that ensures your brother is condemned eternally. For what YOU are has now become his sin. For this is no forgiveness possible. No longer does it matter what he does, for your accusing finger points to him, unwavering and deadly in its aim. It points to you as well, but this is kept still deeper in the mists below the face of innocence. And in these shrouded vaults are all his sins and yours preserved, and kept in darkness, where they cannot be perceived as errors, which the light would surely show. You can be neither BLAMED for what you are, nor can you CHANGE the things it makes you do. And you are each the symbol of your sins to one another, silently, and yet with ceaseless urgency condemning still your brother for the hated thing you are.

That you are what your brother made of you seems most unlikely. Even if he did, who gave the face of innocence to you? Is this YOUR contribution? Who is, then, the "you" who made it? And who is deceived by all your goodness, and attacks it so? Let us forget the concept's foolishness, and merely think of this; there are two parts to what you think yourself to be. If one was generated by your brother, who was there to make the other? And from whom must something be kept hidden? If the world be evil, there is still no need to hide what YOU are made of. Who is there to see? And what but is attacked could NEED defense?"

"Loss is not loss when properly perceived."

"For the separation is only the DENIAL of union, and, correctly interpreted, attests to your eternal knowledge that union is true."

"denial DEPENDS on the real belief in what is denied for its OWN existence."

You can gain some interesting insight here. Jesus is saying that when you deny something, you're really saying that you believe the thing still exists, but at the same time you are saying it doesn't. Denial isn't a state of TOTAL commitment to the belief that the thing is gone, it is only a partial and contradictory belief that the thing is not there - all the while still believing in it.

If for example you deny that God exists, you're really saying that you believe God exists on the other side of the denial, but you just don't want to admit to it. To deny God is to hide from the truth, and the truth cannot actually be changed or undone. It is always there, and always the same. Denial is only pretence, and an attempt to block awareness of the thing being there. But you must believe it is THERE, otherwise you wouldn't bother even using denial at all. And in truth, denying it ATTESTS to the belief in it.

As such denial when properly recognized, is literally saying "I believe in the existence of the thing that I am denying." And this recognition would suggest to you that there is no point in denying its existence, because you're really not denying it.

Similarly in the statement about loss, when you believe you are experiencing a loss, you MUST also be experiencing a belief that the thing you've lost IS STILL THERE. You cannot experience a sense of loss of something of value, unless you STILL value it. And in fact it is precisely because you DO value it and BELIEVE IN IT, that you are feeling a sense of "the loss of it".

This then tells you that even in the loss, the loss is not "only loss" or "pure loss". It is a mixed and conflicted state, a contradictory ego state, in which you are simultaneously saying "I have lost something" at the same time as "I believe in that something existing." If it exists, it is not lost. Only the notion that it has stopped existing can produce a sense of loss. But even in the loss, you're implying that it exists, so IS NOT lost.

When properly perceived and recognized then, loss is actually saying "I have not lost what I think I've lost." The loss is a contradictory self-defeating unfounded and false claim, in the same way as denial is a false claim. If you could recognize loss is NOT loss but rather the conviction that the thing IS THERE, you would not be able to be so committed to the attempt to only lose and not gain.

Jesus is suggesting then that there is a way out of all of our denials, all of our blocks to awareness, all of our senses of loss and lack and deprivation. If we can just 'reframe' it correctly and see the WHOLE of what we're doing, instead of thinking that we're ONLY in a state of loss or denial without an active belief in its opposite, then this could actually give us liberation. There would be no point feeling a sense of loss if it is recognized as contradicting the fact that you believe in what you've lost - and so it can't be lost because you believe it exists, even if you also believe it doesn't.

Denial then is only partly a belief in something not existing - a relative belief, not an absolute one. And similarly loss is only a relative belief that something is lost, and not an absolute loss. It is partly a belief in loss, but driven by also the belief in the presence of the thing, or person, or whatever. Correctly recognized, these states of denial and ego suffering are conflicted, two-faced, contradictory, self-cancelling, and not actually doing what they claim to be doing.

To think you can belief in loss without believing in gain is delusional. To think you can believe in denial without also believing in the thing you're denying, is delusional. You might as well just drop the denial and sense of lack and embrace the fact that you believe the thing still exists in its entirety, and be free of the suffering induced by trying to believe otherwise.

Perhaps then the real 'cause' of suffering is not denial or loss, but the conflicted state of mind which can't seem to commit fully either way to loss or gain, to presence or lack, to existence or non-existence. And really it is believing in BOTH at the same time, which is producing CONFLICT. And that conflict is experienced as suffering. It isn't "being opposite to what's true" that makes you suffer, it's the SPLIT MIND that is experiencing a war between the existence of opposite things.

"Belief does not require vigilance UNLESS it is conflicted."

"You're doing this undo yourself."? No way!!!

The ego objects to the secret of salvation. "I CAN'T be doing this to myself! There's no way I'm causing or choosing this! I don't want this, I didn't ask for this, I didn't do anything to make this happen."

Of course the ego thinks this because this IS the defense that is covering up the awareness that you are all powerful. That you chose and caused.

See, ego equates responsibility with guilt and it has absolutely no notion that you can be responsible WITHOUT being guilty. It sees responsibility as "where the blame lies", who is guilty, who sinned, who did it.

It doesn't WANT to be open to the idea that you could take responsibility and be INNOCENT. And so it has a lot of defences and denials and resistance to this idea.

When you start taking responsibility the ego is going to come in and say that you are guilty because of this. So you're going to have to learn to separate out the responsibility from the accusation.

It can really challenge you to be willing to consider that you might actually be choosing what you are experiencing. It means you're going to have to let everyone off the hook and not hate them. It means you can't be a victim, you can't be unfairly treated, you can't be being misrepresented or not heard or accused.

The ego sees taking responsibility as on par with admitting to a crime that's going to send you to prison. It does not want to do it. It sees confession of truth as totally against your best interests. It's like admitting to being a guilty sinner, tapping into your deepest hidden hurts and sense of regret and guilt and shame.

Who wants to admit to being the cause of something awful, or some suffering, or something unpleasant even? But this is what we're going to have to do. The ego has been judge and jury and has decided that the only way you can have the power to do anything is by having the power to be a guilty suffering attacker.

This is why it's a bit challenging, admitting to the truth. You suspect that you sinned, you suspect you're guilty, you don't even want to look at it in case it's true. Or it seemed true when you last looked at it, so you hid from it and vowed to keep it hidden.

But the truth is that you cannot suffer unless you choose to do so. And that's easy to say but a lot harder to totally own. It means you're going to have to look at and question how you might have actually done this. How you chose. The power of your decision. How you decided and the purpose you were trying to serve in your deciding. Why you wanted to suffer. Why you wanted sickness. Why you wanted pain and misery.

Probably you'll feel that the reason for this self-attack was some kind of horrible sin that you committed long ago, maybe an ancient sin, you know, like trying to kill God? Which you believe is true. So you're going to have to confront that at some point to find a path through so that you can get to where you are responsible without the guilt. Where responsibility can mean a verdict of freedom.

We are quite averse to admitting to what we think we've done because we don't want to. And we've become used to projecting it rather than owning it, because owning it feels like shit. But we are not being asked to own up to something terrible that we did, we're being asked to own up to having NOT DONE ANYTHING.

But the road to freedom requires the total acceptance of total responsibility. Without ANY sin or guilt entering into it. When responsibility is polished clean of all guilt, it simply means you are still as God created you, pure and clean, innocent and sinless. And cause for celebration.

"Loudly the ego tells you NOT to look inward, for if you do, your eyes will light on sin, and God will strike you blind. This you believe, and so you do NOT look. Yet this is NOT the ego's hidden fear, nor YOURS who serve it. Loudly indeed the ego claims it IS. TOO loudly and TOO often. For underneath this constant shout and frantic proclamation, the ego is NOT certain it is so. Beneath your fear to look within because of sin is yet ANOTHER fear, and one which makes the ego tremble. What if you looked within, and saw NO sin? This "fearful" question is one the ego NEVER asks. And you who ask it now ARE "threatening" the ego's whole defensive system too seriously for it to bother to PRETEND it is your friend."