We need to learn to not believe anything we see in this world.
We must learn it is all FALSE. Nothing more than an illusion that isn’t really there, is completely powerless, and cannot resist your undivided will.
We must stop seeing people as bodies.
We must learn to overlook ALL FORMS, because they are deceptive illusions, images of lies which the ego made to cover up the truth.
We must walk around this world as though this world is not even here.
We must IGNORE every sign and signal which suggests that the ego’s "laws" are in effect and that they have real power.
We must learn to completely OVERLOOK absolutely every deceiving appearance, including all sickness (which is fake), all suffering (which is fake), all victimhood (which is fake), and even death (which is fake).
This is quite an unusual state to exist in. Being in a world but not of it. Being here and showing up as a miracle worker, BUT not believing anything you see. Not listening to any ego lies. Not believing the sob story of victims. Not believing the reasons people have for why they are sick. Not believing anything that isn’t OF GOD!
If it’s not aligned with God and God’s Will, and if it is not absolutely TRUE, then it is FALSE!
In this way, we BRING the truth, the light, the love, the power, and the will of God, TO those who falsely believe they "need help", and so shine upon them and HEAL THEM through the MIRACLE WORKING POWER OF LOVE.
Love overlooks all illusions of sickness and suffering because love is *forgiving*. It is not confused about what is real and what is an illusion.
As a miracle worker, YOU must learn to distinguish clearly what is reality and what is illusion. If you are thinking that someone‘s sickness is real, you have lessons to learn. Once you have learned that all sickness is a LIE, and there is no such thing as "real sin", you will be able to say as Jesus did many times, "all your sins are forgiven", because all of your OWN sins have been overlooked as false.
Love then becomes extraordinarily powerful. It can heal anything. There is nothing your holiness cannot do. Your willingness to fixate only on God’s truth and to NOT BELEIVE the ego’s truth at all, makes you extremely powerful. All of the ego’s laws are NOTHING to you. They are all entirely illusions, just puffs of smoke. So EASILY you will be able to bend them to your will, to bring healing to the sick, to restore sight and hearing to those in need, to raise the dead, and to move mountains, LITERALLY.
Love is all you need. Love is the power. And that means, you must accept the atonement for yourself so that you can be open to loving to such a high and truly unconditional degree. Unconditional love knows no orders of difficulty. You are UNLIMITED in what you can do.
A tree ... well.... at first a seed, is planted, and there is husk and germ, and then there is sprout, and now leaves, and a stem, and then a trunk with bark, and then flowers are emerging with petals and pollen, and now the emergence of apples with sweetness, and then there is a seed forming in the apple, and the apple falls to the ground, and now there is a seed again which could become a new tree, and on it goes.
So the question then is, what is this thing? Is it a seed? Well, temporarily, but it turns into something else. Is it a tree? Well not entirely, it was a seed at one point. Is it an apple? For a while, but it used to be bark and petals. So what is this thing? What is this so-called organism that just keeps on changing?
Really the whole cycle of what we call life is a temporary mix of things shifting and changing, as though to say, it has no permanent truth. It is never always something, it's always turning into something else. It shifts and changes, and so says it is one thing one moment and another the next. Another word for that is a lie, or untruth. A physical lie.
There is really no absolute truth of this shapeshifting "lifeform", it's one thing one minute and then you come back some days later and it's become something else. It is partly something, but not wholly anything. Bits of parts sprouting here, other parts sprouting there, at first buds and leaves, then flowers and fruits, who knows what it even is.
This is the transient cyclic undependable uncertain (fear) constantly shifting deceptive dishonest delusional system of the physical world. It has no fixed truth, and it presents one thing as true one moment and changes it's "mind" the next. It has no permanent identity, no absolute anything, nothing dependable, nothing reliable, you can't even trust it.
Such a world symbolises the ego thought system, full of illusions, deceptions, lies, shiftings and changes, nothing ever truly dependable or reliable. Always uncertain, an entire system of fear, always uncertain as to what it is or will be, impossible to depend on, undecided in its insanity, committed to nothing, incapable of being. And as physical objects it has become PHYSICAL FEAR. A physical lie, shifting before your eyes. And who knows what it is or was or ever will be next.
The world is a physical version of insanity. A mind solidified into concrete and walls. All its workings the laws of madness. Its entire system one of total uncertainty and deception. An illusion of a world, driven by insanity and rooted in lies. Not one single part of it is eternal or true.
"The world is the symbol of fear."
""A meaningless world engenders fear."
The totally insane engenders fear because it is completely undependable, and offers no grounds for trust. Nothing in madness is dependable. It holds out no safety and no hope. But such a world is not real. I have given it the illusion of reality, and have suffered from my belief in it. Now I choose to withdraw this belief, and place my trust in reality. In choosing this, I will escape all the effects of the world of fear because I am acknowledging that it does not exist."
"The world you see is the delusional system of those made mad by guilt. Look carefully at this world, and you will realize that this is so. For this world is the symbol of punishment, and all the laws which seem to govern it are the laws of death."
We do not recognize an illusion when we see one. Since birth we've been looking at this world believing it's real. It seems real enough. But "there is nothing so blinding as perception of form."
The problem is, we don't have something MORE real to compare it to. There is no frame of reference to evaluate it or contrast it. If you could see something truly real, it would frame this world AS an illusion, it's illusory nature would become obvious, and you would be able to tell that this world is clearly false and unreal. But you have to have a sense of what true and real things are like in order to be able to compare and contrast, that this illusion is opposite to that.
Think for a moment then about reality, about God, about Heaven, about the nature and quality of infinite immortal being. Contemplate what God is like. The eternal nature, the endlessness, the freedom from sickness and death, the inability to create anything less than perfection. Then ask yourself, is this thing you are looking at, THAT? Does it match up? Does it correlate? Does it seem like something God would create, something immortal, unlimited, perfect, beautiful and pure?
"The world you see is an illusion of a world. God did not create it, for what He creates must be eternal as Himself. Yet there is nothing in the world you see that will endure forever. Some things will last in time a little while longer than others. But the time will come when all things visible will have an end."
With something to compare it to, it becomes more obvious that the things of this world, the stuff you've been looking at since birth, MUST BE an illusion. It must be something manufactured, artificial, pretend, fake, unreal, deceptive. It cannot really exist. There is no cancer in God. There is no insanity in God. There is no dog shit in God. There is no crying in God. There is no attack in God. There is no fear or threat or danger in God. Can this appearance of sin and attack exist WITHIN God's perfect being? Not even slightly. So what is it you're looking at?
It has to be something that is not really there. It has to be a lie, an illusion, a deception and a temptation to believe in something unreal. It's some kind of hallucination. It's make believe fairytale dreaming. It can't exist. It can't really be there at all. It seems to be but it's not. It is really nothing, pretending to be something. The impossible, pretending to be possible. It can't exist in God. It has no real cause. It hasn't been created. Remind yourself of this, and it will become clearer and more RECOGNIZED, that what you're seeing is an ILLUSION, some kind of invented puff of smoke masquerading as something else. It can't be real. It can't exist. It's not there. It's gone.
"Illusions recognized must disappear."
There is only God and His Kingdom. "Only the creations of light are real."
The way Jesus describes the separation from God, there's a huge laundry list of aspects to this "state" that we've entered. The whole entire ego thought system and all its contents, has been given many labels by Jesus. Labels which simultaneously apply to all of it.
He describes the separation as a "detour into fear" for example. He describes that any state where there's even a slight lack of love, as a state of sin. He describes the whole of spacetime as the idea of death, in that "without the idea of death there is no world" - an entire dream of death. He describes that any state less than wholeness will induce sickness and disease.
He also equates sickness with the denial of God. He equates sin with insanity. All forms of unforgiveness ie judgement come into it. All physical sensory states of false perception. Every conceivable form of attack and murder, war and destruction. ALL of it applies to the WHOLE system. Even though it may appear that all these things are *separate things* unrelated to each other.
That means that everything in the ego thought system is a state of fear, death, sickness, judgement, false perception, confusion, insanity, sin, murder, evil, unreality, war, conflict, suffering, denial etc.
What this then tells you about the true nature of fear, is that when you are afraid, you're not just having a small emotion of fear. You're actually "doing the whole system".
You're being entirely ego. And it's a total package deal, in which you are doing all the other aspects of the separation as well. Fear is an attack, fear is denial, fear is conflict, fear is insanity, fear is sin, fear is death, fear is sickness, fear is deception, etc.
If you also consider the split mind, given that Jesus also refers to the separation as a matter of dissociation, going into a dissociated state means one part of your mind is seemingly cut off from the other. This happens in fear. In fear you believe that you are a victim and not a victimizer, that something is happening to you against your will, and you're not the cause of it. It's a state of projection and blame. Fingers are pointed anywhere other than yourself, so that you're totally out of touch with the fact you're threatening yourself.
All special relationships are affected by fear as well. There is mistrust, inequality, and idol worship, all of which inspire a sense of fear that the other person will take away what you lack. Or even the fear that you've given them the right to do something to you. To be special is to be at war, which means to be conflicted, therefore uncertain, therefore afraid. The entire fall of man is a fall into fear - a detour into fear.
(re leaving the garden of eden, being cast out of heaven) "There is, however, considerable clarification of this concept, which must be understood before the real meaning of the "detour into fear" can be fully comprehended. "
We need to understand how and why fear is not just fear on its own, separate from guilt, or separate from death, or separate from sin. We need to RECOGNIZE that ALL the attributes of the ego ALL go together. You can't be participating in one without the other. Fear is actually death. Fear is actually sin. Fear is actually every possible aspect of the ego system rolled into one. Just as death is sin and war is murder and blame is guilt and insanity is judgement.
When you are afraid, you are not "just afraid", helpless and weak and unvinvolved, or cut off from the other ego aspects. You must also be being unloving, attacking, murderous, blameful, judgemental, hurtful, guilty, deceptive, confused, insane, sinful, etc.
Eventually we have to realize that all aspects of the ego system are ONE system, one idea, one problem, one state, calling for one solution. To not be deceived by the idea that you can be participating in only a little part of the system and not the whole thing. All illusions of the separations between these different things are not true. The entire ego, the whole separation idea, is rolled into every part of it. It is all the same.
Real innocence is invulnerable. It is strong. It needs no defense. It cannot be attacked. It has immortality. It is pure. Sinless. Guiltless. Fearless. It is powerful. Truthful. Honest. Nothing happens to true innocence against its will. True innocence can work miracles. It is love and peace and has no enemies.
The ego's version of innocence is vulnerable. It is weak. It needs constant defense. It is deceptive. It is a lie. It lays the groundwork for finding others to be the one who sinned. When someone attacks this "set up" of vulnerability, it is the perfect trap to facilitate justified anger. It makes us victims, open to attack and unable to defend ourselves from death.
Bodies in the world were made by the ego to be the ego's picture of fake innocence. A body which can be weak, small, vulnerable, attackable, seemingly minding its own business only to be assaulted un-asked-for by sinful enemies, the belief in which creates a wonderful opportunity to get rid of sin.
The ego's version of innocence is a guilt trap, a way to make sure we are passive, powerless, helpless and hopeless. To the ego, being innocent is being deserving of attack. It believes the innocent are sinful and therefore deserve punishment. And then when punishment is given, enacted by the fake-innocent themselves upon themselves, it simultaneously claims it did not deserve it, to justify revenge. It plays both sides of victim and victimizer roles.
Fake innocence is denial. It portrays oneself as anything other than the obvious "one who sinned". It is a deflecting maneuver, designed to make guilt unconscious and deflect absolutely all possible signs that we were the one to attack God. It is a facade, a coverup, a persona, painting a picture of ourselves as having not wanted to sin at all, all the while keeping the belief that we really wanted to sin hidden in the mind.
Bodies were projected in order to deny guilt, and guilt was made in order to deny sin, and sin way made in order to deny God.
Bodies which are born and which seem to be innocent in the ways that the ego describes innocent, are not innocent. They are decoys. They are facades designed specifically to deceive and distract and deflect attention away from the sin in the mind which has been made unconscious. They work tremendously well, because for the ego, its main symbol of innocence within its dream is the perfect hiding place for hidden hates and secret sins.
True innocence is invulnerable. It is powerful. It cannot be hurt. It is immortal. It needs no protection or defense. It needs nothing to look after it. It has no dependency on external guardians to keep it safe. It needs nothing from the world to sustain it. It cannot be attacked and it cannot sin and therefore it is utterly free of every illusion of sickness and death. Real innocence brings the peace of God.
There is no real evil in God's reality so it does not really exist.
But evil is an illusion of something being true that isn't. It's what you get when reality is confused with illusions, and the truth is confused with what is false. Everything becomes switched around. You mistake an illusory thing for a real thing. You think stuff is happening that isn't. You think you can do things that you can't. And you become very confused.
The end result of the whole ego thought system, of its whole process of descent into hell, is total confusion.
"The Kingdom is the result of premises, as much as this world is. You HAVE carried the ego's reasoning to its logical conclusion, which is TOTAL CONFUSION ABOUT EVERYTHING. "
When you are totally confused about everything, you have completely mis-identified what everything is. You have no clue what is really real any more. You have no idea of what to trust. There is no sense of actual truth, no sense of reality or sanity. There's a total breakdown of all sense and reason.
A person in this state is essentially highly insane, highly confused, hallucinating, completely out of their mind, and now believes that everything is what it is not. For example death is now seen as eternal life. Heaven is believed to be hell and hell is heaven. Sickness is saving your life. Murder is seen as justified forgiveness. Attack is considered deserved. Hate is now love. And you believe you will find peace by dying.
Such a state of mind is truly what we might call evil. It isn't real evil or absolute evil. But it has all the hallmarks. It's so twisted and backwards. And if a person is close to this state, they WILL likely act in what we call evil ways.
There is such confusion and insanity that the person is likely to become murderous, but at the same time as believing they are not even remotely murderous. They are likely to attack on a whim, become vicious, and vengeful. They will attempt to tempt everyone. They will be deceptive and full of lies. They will undermine and sabotage. They will happily sin against anything. They will celebrate the sacrifice of innocence and life. And they will become lost in the body.
They will think they are the body and develop very twisted special relationships, which ultimately become sick and muderous. They will use people, control people, imprison people and kill people, but not because they think this is what they are doing, they will think they are saving them, helping them, or are justified because of what the person is doing to them. They see themselves as justified victims who are not even remotely victimizing, but yet are victimizers. They may even think they are saving everyone by destroying others.
This is what we call evil or "satanic". It's simply the backwards and totally confused failure to recognize reality and truth. It's the opposite of being close to God. And it signifies such mental illness that love is blotted out. It is a dark and twisted state of mind, resulting in literal states of what we would commonly call mental illness and insanity. And in this state of mind a person seeks to destroy in order to save.
There is so much separation from others that the person is cut off and special, lacking all empathy and sense of connection, lacking all joining, alone and isolated. There is no sharing. There is internal competition between all those who are in a similar boat, because they all want to be special and to be God and have power over everything else. It's everyone for themselves, in a free-for-all of selfishness and conflict. It's a state of war and a state of self attack.
We would consider this "evil" because a person in this state would indeed come across as corrupt, deceptive, untrustworthy, dangerous, sinful, indulgent, selfish, vengeful, and all the qualities that you might associate with some kind of "devil". This so-called "devil" is simply a state of being very confused about what is true.
And the person in this state is VERY mistaken. And remember that mistakes are not sins, they are errors, which call for forgiveness, not punishment. Which means that evil must be forgiven. It must be recognized as a call for love. It must be recognized as a state that needs healing and is just a state of denial, confusion, fear, uncertainty, loneliness, desperation, loss and unconsciousness. The evil person needs love as much as anyone does, and is perhaps even more in need than most.
People who are confused, who thus believe in separation from God, and in sin and death and guilt and fear, are "evil". But they are not REALLY evil, because this evil is nothing more than being very mistaken. These people have mental illness and need correction. They are calling out for love. Which is why God has provided Love in response to heal them and guide them back to sanity. They believe they are really evil, but they aren't. They believe they are sinful monsters, but they aren't.
Everyone deserves forgiveness no matter how evil they may appear to be, because everyone is still a child of God whose REALITY is still perfect innocence and truth. "The ego" is just another word for the idea of "the devil". It's not a real entity, or anything other than a label for insanity. When someone is possessed of the devil they are merely confused and are in the ego.
These mental illnesses were misunderstood and labeled as "devils". The ego in people CAN become very "evil" and vicious, totally backwards and deranged. It can be very twisted. Look at the murderous infectious shit it's done in the world. But it isn't real and it can be undone.
Those who are mentally ill therefore are trying to be evil, in an evil dream. They also want to possess and take from everyone else what they think they lack, being in a state of emptiness and desperation. They see scarcity and danger and fear everywhere, and try to destroy others to take from them what they think is theirs.
They would try to "possess your soul", or have you trade in your soul in some kind of bargain. And ultimately they would call for sacrifice in an offering to a false God that wants even its followers to die. They worship false idols and participate in meaningless magical rituals which attempt to curse and destroy and control. They hide in the darkness and remain in denial, unwilling to look at their belief in their own sinfulness.
They see themselves as innocent and just, yet they are bitter and corrupt. And they cannot remember what love is or who the really are. To them, God and love have become enemies to be destroyed, mistreated, unwanted and undeserved. The Holy Spirit becomes a threat, Jesus is seen as evil, and God Himself is considered blasphemous.
This is nothing but a dream of insanity, in a world made by those driven mad by guilt. There is no real guilt and no world and no evil. Only the good exists. Only God's Kingdom is true.
Here is what Jesus says:
"The "devil" is a frightening concept because he seems to be extremely powerful and extremely active. He is perceived as a force in combat with God, battling Him for possession of His creations. The devil deceives by lies, and builds kingdoms in which everything is in direct opposition to God. Yet he attracts men rather than repels them, and they are willing to "sell" him their souls in return for gifts of no real worth. This makes absolutely no sense."
"The mind can make the belief in separation very real and very fearful, and this belief is the "devil." It is powerful, active, destructive and clearly in opposition to God, because it literally denies His Fatherhood. Look at your life and see what the devil has made. But realize that this making will surely dissolve in the light of truth, because its foundation is a lie. Your creation by God is the only Foundation that cannot be shaken, because the light is in it. Your starting point is truth, and you must return to your Beginning. Much has been seen since then, but nothing has really happened. Your Self is still in peace, even though your mind is in conflict. You have not yet gone back far enough, and that is why you become so fearful. As you approach the Beginning, you feel the fear of the destruction of your thought system upon you as if it were the fear of death. There is no death, but there is a belief in death."
We need to learn to stop treating fear like it's just some kind of natural phenomenon, or a normal response, or some aspect of a biological flight-or-fight mechanism, or something that protects us from danger, or any of the other bullshit explanations for fear.
We actually need to question what fear is doing and why it is doing it, and where it's really coming from. It's all too easy to simply "be afraid", to experience the fear, without any kind of questioning of whether the fear is natural or needed or well founded.
Fear is the opposite of love. You can't be loving when you're afraid. Which would you rather be, loving or afraid? Which one is a more truth-filled experience?
It's one thing to become afraid and to think, well, I'm afraid "because of" a big long random list of outside influences that you think cause the fear. And to then be locked inside that perception with no apparent way out of it, since you believe that you are not the one who is choosing the fear at all.
But we can't do that. We have to bring fear into question, because fear is actually untruth. It is always a lie. There is never any good reason to be afraid. Fear is never justified. And fear is always a deceptive ego mechanism for making your situation worse.
We have to look at our "fearing" and take some responsibility for generating this condition. We have to be willing to admit that we are the ones who have actually created fear. We keep making it. We keep putting it in our experience. We keep choosing it. And we keep using it ON PURPOSE to play the part of victim so that we can get some side-benefits.
Fear allows us to disown responsibility. It allows us to seemingly shield ourselves from guilt. It lets us pretend that someone else is at fault. It allows us to label others as enemies and project guilt onto them. It lets us hide from God. It lets us have a separate identity that God did not create. And it allows us to pursue our 'dream' of being an individual. These are quite significant reasons for fear that we need to look at and own up to if we're to live a life without fear.
Is it possible to live with no fear? To be 100% fearless? Not like, some idiot that is over-confident and reckless and putting on a show of bravado while being secretly insecure... but the complete absence of all fear, and therefore, only the presence of unconditional love at all times? A love that is so certain and so secure that within it there can be no reason for fear? And no desire to choose it. Of course it is possible, as Jesus has demonstrated.
So don't think fear is just some natural biological or human thing. It's not. It's a state of mental illness. It is insanity. And it is a game that we keep playing with ourselves to pretend we're not who we are. There are some very sneaky reasons for having fear, and none of them are honest or truthful.
So when Jesus says "be not afraid", he isn't just saying, don't freak out when I appear out of nowhere, He's saying, stop choosing fear and recognize that love is the only reality. He's not telling us to be brave in the face of danger, he's telling us there IS no danger. And that any efforts we're making to go into fear without questioning it, are really a deception on our part. We don' need to be afraid because only love is real.
If ACIM is to be believed, and interpreted correctly, it is literally saying that this world is the OPPOSITE of what's real. And therefore it is completely unlike the nature of God's Kingdom. Indeed, unlike your real self.
"For this world IS the opposite of Heaven, having been made to BE its opposite. And EVERYTHING here takes a direction EXACTLY opposite to what is true."
"earth the other's sorry outcome which is Heaven's opposite in every way."
"This is the world of time, where all things end."
"Without the idea of death there is no world."
This presents a major challenge, because if the world is completely opposite to reality, truth, nature and eternal life, then every single thing in it is going to be doing things which are completely against who and what you are, against God's nature and will.
The Holy Spirit is now a spokesperson for the true nature of God's reality, and our own, and is here with us to help us to become heaven-like instead of earth-like. All of his motivation points towards eternal life rather than towards the world of mortality.
"The Holy Spirit uses logic as easily, and as well, as does the ego, except that HIS conclusions are NOT insane. They take a direction EXACTLY opposite, pointing as clearly to Heaven as the ego points to darkness and to death" "Nothing the world believes is true."
But if you'll think on this it's pretty crazy the contrast. Here we are in a world which seems very tangible and immense, and yet Jesus is saying that every single thing in it is opposite, upside-down, and backwards, from what is true. And that the body was made to deceive us into believing it is real. "The body is the instrument the mind made in its striving to deceive itself."
"Only the body makes the world seem real."
"The body is not the means by which the real world can be seen."
It would be much seemingly easier to just live a life in this world acting the way bodies act, interacting with objects, not questioning anything. Just taking everything to be verbatim as-it-is and not deceptive at all. Believing everything you see and hear.
Jesus's message is far more radical though, because if what he says is true, then fundamentally the entirety of space and time and all their contents, including all planets and galaxies, are completely false, unreal and untrue. "The only effort you need make, to give this world away in glad exchange for what you did NOT make is willingness to learn THE ONE YOU MADE IS FALSE."
So now on a daily basis, you have this task of literally questioning everything in the world, trying to recognize the world is an illusion, trying not to be deceived by everything the body shows you, trying not to identify with the body as your self, and basically denying and rejecting everything in spacetime.
That can seem very unnatural perhaps, to suggest you have to deny that the world is of God, and then deny everything about it, but Jesus does appear to be telling us to do this. That the only way out of suffering, sickness, misery and death, is to cancel out the entire seeming universe and believe none of it. That's a pretty tall order.
"This world you see MUST BE DENIED, for sight of it is costing you a different kind of vision."
Nevertheless, it's clear that this is what Jesus is instructing us to do. To exchange the belief that this world is founded on reality, for a recognition that it is nothing but a dream. A fiction of a world which is hallucinated and not really there at all. Nor does it comprise anything real or permanent or of God.
"What if you recognized this world is a hallucination? What if you REALLY understood you made it up? What if you realized that those who SEEM to walk about in it, to sin and die, attack and murder and destroy themselves, are WHOLLY unreal?"
The world is nothing. Not something, but nothing at all. It's not there. It's a pretend world, hiding the Kingdom of God. And there is nothing in the world worth keeping as a substitute for the real thing.
"Yet its nothingness IS your salvation"
"The world can ADD nothing to the power and the glory of God and His Holy Sons, but it CAN blind the Sons to the Father if they behold it. You cannot behold the world and know God. Only one is true."
"The world you see is an illusion of a world. God did not create it, for what He creates must be eternal as Himself. Yet there is nothing in the world you see that will endure forever. Some things will last in time a little while longer than others. But the time will come when all things visible will have an end."
"in that instant is the world forgot, with time forever ended as the world spins into nothingness from where it came."Usually we want to get rid of everything we do not like, everything that feels harmful, every fear, every upset, every ounce of grief or loss. We want to get rid of all our enemies and things that hurt.
But this is actually the ego in action. It wants to get rid of these things because there is a potential that these things might be used to wake you up.
So long as you're in the midst of a lesson, in which something seems to be against your will, you will have this sense of "I don't want this and it shouldn't be happening". This is the ego's reaction. It does not want you to use this opportunity for forgiveness. It does not want you to learn the lesson.
Not that the ego is arbitrarily against you. You made it and you asked it to do this for you. You wanted it to deflect you away from sources of healing, from anything that might trigger an awakening to truth. You wanted it to keep telling you that stuff isn't supposed to happen to you, and you wanted it to make you see things as if they are happening against your will. That way you could stay asleep.
But each time you try to 'get rid of' what you do not like, or be free of a lesson, or fix a problem, or make a bad person go away, or stop something from happening, you're really using ego denial. And you do this in the name of spirituality.
You think it is spiritual to have a life where there are no problems, where nothing is happening to you, where you have no enemies, where everything goes well, where people seem to just adore you, and where you aren't hurt or offended by anyone. I mean, as a goal that's great... That could be true of real spirituality, but the ego wants this goal WITHOUT awakening.
So that means, getting rid of all protagonists, all offenders, all enemies, and all threats. It tells you you shouldn't be afraid and that fear is a bad thing. It tells you not to be guilty. It even tells you you should be constantly happly or people-pleasing. These are all deceptive ways the ego gets you to NOT deal with your shit, and it forms a spiritualized ego.
When you are afraid, that's very good, because you are being confronted with the results of some belief that you have and it's coming into your awareness. This is a great opportunity. Instead of the fear hiding out in the back of your mind, it's being brought into awareness. You don't like it, for sure, but recognize it is an opportunity because now some normally hidden dark shit has come out into the open where you can take a look at it.
It's all about how you use things - whether you use it to deny your shit or use it to bring light to your shit and undo it. So you could take the fact you're scared as a great opportunity to look at WHY you are scared, rather than to just want the fear to go away. It's pretty normal to want the fear to go away, but it's not healthy. It is healthier to take a look at it with Holy Spirit and find out why you are afraid... What guilt is the fear based on? What's the deeper cause of it? Why do you want it? How's it serving you to keep you in the dark? Where is the so-called truth that surrounds the fear to make it seem justified? What is the real truth of this situation?
Its the same with feeling guilty, upset, angry, offended, whatever... Each time this stuff comes to your awareness it's a great opportunity to heal and undo. So don't try to hide this stuff away. Don't shove it back down or want to get rid of it or to avoid it. And don't blame people for triggering it off - they're trying to help you to look at the stuff you don't want to look at. You're better off dealing with it and then being done with it, rather than constantly hiding from it and feeling its torment in the back of your mind, only to keep resurfacing saying "please acknowledge me and recognize my message to help you grow, and please use me for awakening."
This is all great material. Great opportunities to make progress. It's hard work but it's worth it, and it's far better for you than to want to just keep making this stuff go away. You can be free of it permanently if you deal with it properly and heal it. Isn't that better?
"An unwilling will does not mean anything, because it is a contradiction in terms which actually leaves nothing. You can make yourself powerless only in a way that has NO MEANING AT ALL. When you think you are unwilling to will with God, you are not thinking. God's will IS thought. It cannot be contradicted by thought."
"And His Sons, who are like Him, cannot contradict themselves or Him. But their thought is so powerful that they can even imprison the mind of God's Son if they so choose. This choice does make the Son's function unknown TO HIM, but never to his Creator. And because it is not unknown to his Creator, it is forever knowable to him."
When we try to use our free will to will AGAINST free will, or in essence to "not use" your will, you attempt to be UN-willing. But this is a USE of will, and so makes no sense. It's more like, willing strongly that you don't will anything at all. It is a loss of will, and a loss of freedom. That is why it results eventually in the loss of the will to live (death).
What the ego and the world call free will, is actually a reduction in will, and an illusion of freedom. It's more like an opposition to will, a rogue or alien will, which in deceptive illusions SEEMS to will separate things, but in truth is not REALLY willing anything.
What SEEMS to be "independence" and autonomy separate from all others, held up like a hero, is really the absence of freedom, absence of self, and absence of life. The ego is not your self, it is the denial of your self, an unwillingness to be your living eternal self, which is why it resists life and induces the "death of you".
The illusion of conflicting and contradictory "wills" runs rampant in this world, but it is not really what free will looks like. IT's more like a bunch of prisoners who have imprisoned their will due to being unwilling to will like God. And in this world, being upside down and backwards, those who will the most "freely" are really the most unwilling to will with God.
This is why Jesus asks us to have a little (and later total) willingness. We need to move upwards into freedom, and into accord with God's will, so that we are willing freely. Or rather that we are willing anything at all. This is why in order to enter heaven, you have to be FULLY WILLING to do so. You cannot be forced there, because you ARE free, but in your "exile" you are resisting being free, using your free will to oppose your freedom. When you are ready, you will go home to God. And nothing will be able to stop you.
Unwillingness is really a state in which your will is being used to will against itself, and this means there is conflict in your willing. You are willing one thing, and opposing it at the same time. This can only CANCEL OUT the will's power and produce NO REAL EFFECTS. This in turn results in the mind seeming to "have no power to cause anything", which is why those who are unwilling have no miraculous power to heal or change the world.
When your will becomes undivided, and you are no longer willing against yourself, which is the secret of salvation, you become single-minded instead of split-minded, enter into miraculous power, and become unlimited and unopposed. Since you are no longer stopping yourself from exercising the power of God, there is NOTHING your holiness cannot do.
"No one comes to the atonement except willingly."
"God does not coerce."
"God commended His Spirit to you, and asks that you commend yours to Him."
"Nothing can prevail against our united wills because nothing can prevail against God's."
"Your will is free, and nothing can prevail against it."
"Nothing can prevail against a Son of God who commends his spirit into the Hands of his Father. 2 By doing this the mind awakens from its sleep and remembers its Creator. 3 All sense of separation disappears."