Consider for a moment, a definition of yourself, in which YOU CANNOT CHANGE. You are absolutely changeless. You exist always the same, fixed, absolute, certain, permanent. Something that never alters, adjusts, transforms. Something incapable of becoming anything, losing anything, having anything taken away from it, or added. Just the same, always and forever, always existing, always being, always you. Same old you since you were created.

Then with this is idea it being IMPOSSIBLE to experience change, consider the contrast this produces to all the forms of suffering in the world. Someone doing something to you, being affected, upset, made to feel this way or that, moved by the wind, affected by the environment, threatened by the politicians and the warmongers, altered by sickness, pushed around by health concerns etc. All of it... all forms of CHANGE. All things which say "I can change you and you will change whether you like it or not."

What are you and where do you stand and how are you able to play any of these games if YOU CAN NEVER CHANGE? If you cannot be changed by anything, you are invulnerable, immortal, eternal. Always perfect, always strong, always beyond the reach of every kind of influence, every force, every attack, every threat to your nature. You cannot change, you have never changed. You remain as God created you and always will be the same. So can you believe you have been changed, caused, forced, yet again, to become something you can never be?

"You were NOT born to die. You CANNOT change, because your Function HAS been fixed by God." UrT29G4

"Can YOU see guilt where God KNOWS there is perfect innocence? You can DENY His knowledge, but you CANNOT change it." UrT13C8

"You cannot be ANYWHERE that God did not put you, and God created you as part of HIM. That is both WHERE you are and WHAT you are. This is COMPLETELY unalterable. It is total inclusion. You cannot change this now or ever. It is forever true. It is NOT a belief, but a fact." UrT6C6

"In the longer practice period, we will think about your reality and its wholly unchanged and unchangeable nature." UrW67L2

"Now He can remind the world of sinlessness, the one unchanged, unchangeable condition of all that God created." UrM19A2

"Your Self is radiant in this holy joy, unchanged, unchanging and unchangeable forever and forever." UrW190L6

"As God created you, you must remain unchangeable with transitory states by definition false. And that includes all shifts in feeling, alterations in conditions of the body and the mind, in all awareness and in all response." UrW152L5

"The Thought God holds of you is like a star, unchangeable in an eternal sky. So high in Heaven is it set that those outside of Heaven know not it is there. But still and white and lovely will it shine through all eternity. There was no time it was not there. No instant when its light grew dimmer or less perfect ever was. Who knows the Father knows this light, for He is the eternal sky which holds it safe, forever lifted up and anchored sure." UrT30D8

"Only what God creates is irreversible and unchangeable. What YOU have made can always be changed, because when you do not think LIKE God, you have not really thought at all. Delusional ideas are NOT thought, but you CAN think that you believe in them." UrT5G11

Which means, everything about God exists already, is complete already, is in perfect divine order, free of needs and problems, in divine health at all times, and absolutely always the same.

So when we're having a relationship with God, we might want to look at in which ways we're really treating God based on how God is, versus some idea of a 'changeable God'.

If God were changeable, you might be justified in, for example, asking Him to do something ... ie he hasn't done it already. Or, praying for something to be done which isn't his will. Or, believing that he doesn't have a desire to heal certain person due to sins. etc... various beliefs that arise out of the idea of a conditional, fickle God.

God has already accomplished everything because God already created. His creation is whole and complete already. He has already put into place everything that you really need, your ideal environment, the perfect conditions for your health, etc. He has also already established His laws and set up the 'mechanisms' by which you should live in alignment to His will.

So it's not so much a matter of, let's get God to bend to our conditions and do what we think hasn't been done yet. It's more like, let's accept what God has put in place and get into the role that He has chosen for us and act based on the laws he has already established and live in the way that He has already designed for us.

It's not that God is failing to give us a perfect life. But that's exactly what you're saying when you think that your life is a mess and isn't working out properly and needs correction. It's not because God has failed. God never fails. It's because we have resisted God's way, have resisted God's will, and want to have things be different. And it's also not that God isn't providing or giving or sharing, it's that we're not receiving. We're ignoring God and shutting out His help, it's not that He isn't helpful.

So it's like, we have this natural role, a 'function', which God has set in place, to be the Holy Son of God, and to be free of all illusions and all ego, and to live forever, carrying out His will and extending His kingdom. And if we're not doing that, it's because we have chosen not to, and therefore what can we expect but to meet with problems? The fact is, our ego self wants to have its own separate existence with its own rules and laws and power and do all this without God and expect it to go well. Life doesn't work smoothly without God.

So it's really a matter, what it comes down to, in the undoing of the authority problem (trying to have authority over God rather than accept and extend His authority), whether you are willing to BE what God has intended you to be, or whether you still want to be something else. Whether you want to be governed by laws of sickness and chaos and death, which you made, or whether you want to be under no laws but God's - the laws of eternal life.

Holy Relationships occur when a person recognizes that the other does absolutely nothing to them, nether good nor bad, neither beneficial or harmful, neither special or hurtful.

In specialness, you believe the other DOES things to you, causes you to feel a certain way, pleases you, attracts you, helps you, loves you for you, etc. But along with that they will hurt you, offend you, annoy you, attack you and reject you.

It's always a package deal, because to be at the effect of another you MUST be in the victim mindset even if those effects are something you think you want. You will select someone as special who SEEMS to give you as much of what you want as possible, and as little of what you don't want, but the illusion is that they MUST give you both if you are to be at the effect of them.

If they can do anything to you at all, if you are to "receive" from them "against your will", so that you can be changed by them and affected by them, you are a victim, regardless of whether it seems like a positive desirable effect or a negative hurtful effect.

You do not want to be at the effect of others whatsoever. To do so means you are vulnerable and attackable and dependant and in the ego thought system.

You are meant to be invulnerable, completely causal, never affected by anything, and certainly not at the effect of someone else, no matter how special they seem to be.

If you are to relate to the person in a holy way, you must be whole and complete in yourself, not trying to have them complete you or make up for your lack or do stuff for or to you that you can't do yourself.

It's okay to be with someone and to have support and encouragement and to learn lessons together, etc, which can take a lot of time. That's why you come together, to learn how to love yourself (lol). But the unraveling of that specialness will be the lesson you need to learn, and it may be upsetting at first as the specialness comes into question.

One way or another, special relatioships can turn into holy relationships by the undoing of the "relationship" based in the ego, which is really NOT a relationship. You are not communicating or relating to someone, really, unless you are whole and coming from love. There is a fiction of communication and sharing but its based on mutual hallucinations and private worlds.

Real communication and real relationship and real sharing can only ever be based on love, because only love can be shared. An absence of love is an absence of sharing and is isolation. You can have a special relationship and believe that you are so profoundly affected by another person, yet in actual fact be completely isolated from them and not really genuinely joining with them at all.

To relate from holiness you need to relate to yourself with holiness, and to God with holiness. Then you can relate to the other's holiness and join with their mind. Joined minds are real relationships. Love is the only connection. This is why the Holy Spirit, who is love, is the "highest communication medium", being completely open to share and extend love.

It is not possible to see bodies as equal. I know there is a strong movement in society towards trying to see all body types, shapes, sizes, persuasions, as equal. However, this is insane.

If you take the attempt to see all bodies as equal to its logical conclusion, it MUST mean that ALL bodies, all body types, all shapes and sizes, BECOME COMPLETELY IRRELEVANT to who or what a person is. And that means recognizing that people ARE NOT BODIES AT ALL.

The body is ITSELF an attack, and a misrepresentation of a person. A person is a spirit, not a body. The body and its differences automatically conflict with the differences of other bodies. If my body is one shape or color and yours is another, this IS an attack. It is an attempt to assert that we are not the same.

You cannot keep the bodies and pretend there is equality. You cannot keep the differences and pretend there is no difference. It is denial to say that several different body types are all equally lovable. There would not BE different types in love. Love does not SEE differences. It looks past the differences entirely, and ignores them.

We are not meant to find yet another way to KEEP the body and make it "spiritual". This is our ego's attempt to spiritualize the body and pretend that it is holy and worthy and special. All that does is stroke the ego. While anyone is represented as NOT IDENTICAL, there is no equality. Physical bodies are automatically devices for separation. If you SEE ONE, you are separate.

You must learn to look past bodies entirely, because the body actually BLINDS YOU and hides from your sight what the person actually IS. Behind the body, which SEEMS like a picture of a "person" with a face, there is a hidden being, a spirit being, whose body BLOCKS you from seeing them. If you see the body SURFACE and do not see past it to the spiritual being inside, you are NOT seeing the person.

To be enamored with someone's body is NOT spirituality. To put the body on a pedestal, to defend it, or to worship it, is NOT spirituality. Bodies are not supposed to be there. People, children of God, are all absolutely perfectly equal in their mind and heart, as God created them ALL in his own likeness, and they are all identical. Identical children. Anything which looks like it is DIFFERENT, is NOT the person.

So we can't really say, a black person and a white person, or a male or a female, or a gay or a straight, or anything else that relates to THE BODY, and equate that with THE PERSON. If you do that, if you associate the person with their body, you are attacking them. To be identified with a body is to be confused about who you are, and about who other people are. People are not bodies. You are not a body. It is not your self. You are deceived by what your own body's eyes tell you about other people's bodies. Bodies do not SEE the spirit. They were made NOT to see the spirit. It's a trap.

The requirement to eat and get food is built into spacetime, did you know that? If space is the idea that something is "over here and not over there", then the thing over here lacks what is over there. This makes all of spacetime fundamentally lack based. Which means that everything that relies on it, which is all physical matter, every atom, is in some way lacking and deficient. Everything thus depends on something other than itself to attempt to become whole or sustained.

This lays the ground rules for what later becomes "feeding". Taking something outside of something to try to replenish what is lacking. And because of the ego's laws, if you take something from somewhere in order to address a lack, there is no increase, and only decrease, and now that thing is forced to lack "against its will". So if I take the apple from the tree the tree is now lacking an apple, and I have impoverished it.

If I take an animals body it no longer has its body. If I take water from the fountain it now lacks some water. Everywhere in this world this is true, with absolutely no regard for the form or type of object. And the act of "getting" from "others" is a murderous, attacking act, because it's an attempt to deprive them and to diminish what they have and to steal it away for your own selfish reasons. And so every single atom in spacetime is fundamentally, scientifically selfish.

The system of massive dependency later becomes what people call an ecosystem. An inter-dependent system where stuff consumes other stuff, selectively, and so it seems some things are "more ok" than other things. That's just part of the hierarchy of illusions. There are no special separate laws for animals versus plants versus microbes. It's all governed by the same ego laws of physics which are fundamentally selfish and murderous. This is why this is a cruel world that God did not create.

It's impossible to not be murderous if you do anything in this world physically. "The world of bodies is the world of sin." Best you can do is let Holy Spirit use the body and inform you of what to select, but this is not on a basis of being able to spiritualize or avoid the fact of what is happening here based on ego's laws. If you were truly operating under holy laws, God's laws, and no other, you would manifest food out of thin air, symbolizing the laws of increase of God, so that nothing is deprived or made to lack at your expense.

That is the ONLY way not to be murderous, by breaking the ego's laws entirely and bypassing them. This is why Jesus materialized food to feed people. You can justify and spiritualize a breakdown of objects into categories and give some special rules and other different rules if you want, suggesting some items are more sacred than others so you should avoid eating them, but that's a fragmenting and separation-based illusion of harmlessness, trying to be harmless to some parts of the world of death so as to justify why its okay to harm other parts. "The world was made that problems (like this) could not be escaped."

Only in God's Kingdom or under God's laws is there the possibility of true harmlessness.

"The problem which everyone MUST decide is the fundamental question of his own authorship. All fear comes ultimately, and sometimes by way of very devious routes, from the denial of Authorship."

The "authority problem" is where, in heaven, you who are an effect of God and a co-cause of creation, attempt to turn around and CAUSE GOD, while also DENYING YOU ARE HIS EFFECT. You deny his fatherhood and causation of you, you reject everything he has therefore GIVEN you, and therefore ORPHAN yourself - "separate yourself off" from sharing everything with him, collapsing your oneness and trying to "go it alone."

You then proceed to try to AUTHOR YOURSELF, which leads to you trying to reinvent yourself and make a self (ego), while simultaneously believing you have not BEEN authored, and this begins the fear that you DO NOT EXIST - which is the basis of all fear.

"The dispute over authorship has left such uncertainty in the minds of man that some people have gone so far as to doubt whether they were ever created at all."

All fear is the fear of not existing - the fear of death - which is the same thing as the belief that you have not been created - that you have no source, and are therefore fundamentally UN-CAUSED, and not a co-cause, and so must be purely an effect/victim that is ceasing to exist.

AS you begin to open up to hand back to God HIS FUNCTION, in which you acknowledge that you share everything with him, what you have is what he has GIVEN you, you have nothing OTHER than what he has given you, he is your cause and creator and father, and you RECEIVE what he has given you by reclaiming your shared inheritance, you are once again acknowledging that God is the AUTHOR of you, and therefore the AUTHORITY in terms of causal power that has CREATED you. You as a creation are SECOND to him - his son, not his father.

Essentially this is a movement toward giving the role of God back to God, reinstating God as your creator, recognizing that you have BEEN created, allowing yourself to receive everything from God again, and to therefore recognize that you ARE LOVED, you are BEING given, and therefore your existence is being CAUSED BY something other than yourself. Which means that you do not establish or maintain or put in place the continuation of your existence - which you tried to do driven by the fear of death, but instead that God is the one who is causing you to exist FOREVER, and THEREFORE, you absolutely exist and will always exist. Which IS THE END OF FEAR - the reclamation of your GOD SUSTAINED immortality.

"The issue of authority is really a question of authorship. When an individual has a "authority problem," it is ALWAYS because he believes he is the author of himself"

"The authority problem remains the ONLY source of perceived conflict, because the ego was MADE out of the wish of God's Son to father HIM."

"The authority problem IS "the root of all evil."

"We spoke before of the authority problem as involving the concept of USURPING His power. The ego believes that this is what YOU did, because it believes it IS you. It follows, then, that if you identify WITH the ego, you MUST perceive yourself as guilty."

All of the course’s METAPHYSICS is based on perfectly clear, black and white, impeccable logical reasoning. REASON is the attribute of a sane mind. Through reason, you can literally SEE SENSE. What makes perfect sense is true.

"The opposite of love is fear, but what is all-encompassing can have no opposite."

(something which is everything, leaves no room for anything else, right? Something that takes up all the space leaves no room for an opposite. That’s perfectly logical)

"Noting real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists."

(if real things cannot be threatened, and ending existence requires threat/attack, then everything that produces non-existence must be unreal. That’s perfectly logical)

"If perfect love casts out fear, and if fear exists, then there is NOT perfect love. But only perfect love really exists. Therefore, if there is fear, it creates a state which does not exist."

(if there is fear, there is not love, ie there is a lack of love, because love’s presence casts out or shines away fear. Lights dispells darkness. This seems to suggest if darkness is present, light is not. Or if fear is present, love is not. But believing that is believing illusions. Only love exists, and love is all encompassing, so fearful states do not really exist. This is perfectly logical)

"You HAVE carried the ego's reasoning to its logical conclusion, which is TOTAL CONFUSION ABOUT EVERYTHING."

(believing that what is true is false, and that what is false is true, is total confusion about what is true and real. Ego is a state of total confusion. Which is inanity - believing illusions are real, believing lies are true, beliving the impossible is possible. This is perfectly logical)

"A sick body does not make any sense. It could not make any sense, since sickness is not what it is for."

(bodies are communication devices. Confusing their purpose and attacking them for you seeming to fail to communicate is insane. Thus sickness (attack upon the body) is nonsense. It’s implementing on false grounds as a defense against truth and against sense. No one in their right mind can be sick. This is perfectly logical)

Jesus goes on, and the course is littered with blatantly logical statements. If you can SEE the logic in them, behind the words, you are seeing the metaphysics. The metaphysics is totally flawless and not open to interpretation or opinion. There aren’t 1500 different versions of the LOGIC. There is only ONE. Otherwise you are making logical errors. And this is also why only the ONE truth is true.

Anyone reasoning correctly should have no option but to accept and admit and agree with it. Seeing sense means seeing the LOGIC. WHY it makes sense. This is why the atonement eventually becomes so obvious that it makes sense, is the only truth that makes sense, and nothing else makes any sense. When you can see why it is the only TRUTH, logically, reasonably, you will have no OPINION left to defend against it, and will submit yourself to God.

The atonement is the logical concluson of God providing a perfect answer to the mistaken logic of the separation. This is why it is a flawless response, making ascension absolutely inevitable. It makes perfect sense that God knows how to perfectly resolve the logical thinking ERRORS of his children.

Can the death of the planet Earth ever be God's will? Science can confirm that in a couple billion years, the sun will become so hot that it will boil all the oceans. All the water will turn to vapor producing a greenhouse effect which will make life on earth absolutely impossible. After several billion years, the sun is going to expand to a red giant so hot and so close to the earth that the atmosphere will evaporate into space and the earth will be roasted. It will be utterly impossible for any lifeforms to survive this.

So now you have to ask yourself, if this can possibly be God's will? Is it possible that Earth is a creation of God, part of his kingdom, made by his will, his absolute treasure, and have something like this happen? And if you think that something like this happening is IS okay, how can you justify that this is okay? Because you're now talking about the total destruction of the planet, every form of life being utterly obliterated, all human bodies being reduced to ash, all the oceans boiled to death, all the forests disintegrated, every single creature exterminated in pain and agony and screaming death and scorching fire, which rips them part from the outside in. Can God be held accountable for such an occurrence?

You see, some people studying ACIM believe that this is natural, it's okay, and that the only reason why this might seem "upsetting" is because you're not looking at it right. And that if you look at it right, you'll see that all this stuff CAN STILL HAPPEN, but you can see some kind of spiritual perfection in it such that you are utterly unphased by it and see it AS God's will and perfect kingdom. A fitting HOME for his son. But the truth is that once this event transpires in spacetime, the entire planet is going to be swallowed up by the sun. There isn't going to BE an earth. You won't be able to be in a human body. You won't have a life. And you won't have a perception to enamor it with.

There isn't going to be a world that you can "look at differently." There isn't going to be a version of the world seen with true perception. There isn't going to be a forgiven world or a real world or a saved world or a physical world of any kind. There isn't going to be a world which "is in truth really made of spirit". It won't be there, AT ALL, in any way, on any level. It will be utterly annihilated and erased from existence forever, scattered across the universe as little lumps of death.

Can you justify that such an occurrence and actual possibility and state is something God himself, a loving God, a protective God, a life-giving God, a God who can never die or produce death, a creative non-destructive God, a God who only ever upholds the complete cessation of all suffering, a God who wills that you be happy forever, a God who does not want any kind of cruelty to ever occur, could conceive of AND produce AND enforce AND CAUSE, such an event to happen? Don't forget to smile and be happy as God smashes you in the face with a star. Open your arms to receive its loving embrace!

Are you okay with that? Is there some way your mind can twist SO far into what you fantasize is a deep spiritual hyper-subtle perception, that reveals to you that such an event is utterly true to the nature of God? That such an event is beautiful and delightful and a shining symbol of God's mercy and innocence and harmlessness? Because you're got to make a really EXTREME stretch to try to pull off such a claim.

This isn't even't the most extreme torturous thing that can happen in this space. Your planet could get swallowed up and ripped apart by a black hole. Your planet could get irradiated by massive doses of life-killing radiation. Your planet could lose its star and go into a total freeze. Your planet could lose its atmosphere and become unbreathable. Your planet could collide with a massive asteroid and be blown apart into billions of pieces of death hurtling through space.

Some will say that all of these "ways" of looking at these "events" is entirely ego. That this is an ego interpretation of what's happening. And that if it were not for this viewpoint, if you were to just "look at it truly", you would see that all of these things are just absolutely divine, beautiful, wonderful. That they are God's holy benevolent will. That God WANTS planets to be blown apart on which the lifeforms are utterly helpless to stop it and experience extreme suffering as a result, not to mention being shafted to smithereens in a moment's notice. But apparently if you LOOK AT IT RIGHT, it's not a problem? If you look at it right, it's not suffering? If you look at it right, GOD IS LIKE THIS?

Can you live with that? Can you live with such a God? A God who makes worlds that reject and destroy and deny life, giving life only to take it away, establishing apparent beauty only to destroy it? Can you live with a God that establishes bodies through the illusion of childbirth only to have them killed off later? Is the only way you can "live with that" and be "at peace with that", to change how you look at it? And if you change how you look at earth being utterly destroyed by a solar cataclysm, are you now going to be looking at a spirit-earth, which God apparently created as the real earth, behind the physical appearance of the layer of earth, even though that ENTIRE earth has been blown up? It won't be there to look at!

If any of the things of spacetime exist at all in any way, God is cruel. Either God is cruel or God did not create them. You can't then say, well, the ego created the physical interpretation of what God created, because that now says that God did create "spiritual supernovas", and "spiritual black holes", and "spiritual explosions", and "spiritual war machines." Did God create a spirit-based machine gun? Did God conceive of and allow to exist in any way, a holy sanctioned divine completely non-destruction-based device which is capable of blowing other such created things apart at will? Is that the kind of God that you think God is like? Because there is no way that I will ever personally accept that kind of a definition of God, or a claim of his heavy-handed capabilities.

Anyone who thinks God is like that and would create such things, in any way, at any level, as physicalities or materials or ideas or thoughts or illusions or dreams of in ANY WAY, good luck to you, because you're insane. There is nooooo way that A Course in Miracles is teaching us that ANY OBJECT has spiritual reality. Its FORM does not change, just because you forgive it. Its shapes and its sizes do not change. Earth hasn't just suddenly doubled in size because of some forgiveness you did. Your ACIM book hasn't suddenly turned into a butterfly. The form and the laws of physics governing the form remain the same, even if you see in them a reflection of the laws of God. The laws of death and destruction will always be operating in order TO make the physical material things function, no matter how spiritual you are.

There is not a spiritual counterpart to a planet whose existence ENTIRELY depends on death. There isn't a better version of it. There isn't a spiritual ideal version of it. It is either planet of death, or not. Heaven does not contain a planet earth. Period. Earth is going to die, and it already is. If you stop calling it death, it doesn't change that fact. If you see it as lovely, it doesn't change that fact. It is still going to go through the motions of terrible destruction. And God would never have produced anything even remotely capable of such motions. Do you really think God would create something, anything, which can even SEEM to decay? That can change form? That can even be attacked and destroyed in any way?

Anything destructible is NOT OF GOD. And seeing it "as" destructible is NOT an option. It is its inherent nature. Destruction is not a misperception of creation.

The ego believes in oblivion. Not JUST the idea of being destroyed as in death, in which the body is disintegrated into pieces, but that such a thing is an irreversible ending beyond which there is no return. That you would die and then cease to exist, oblivious to life, forgotten, completely lost, totally annihilated. As though there is an actual ENDING that can take place, and you can get stuck in this ending and never return to a beginning. As though a rift or gap or separation so deep that there is no escape from it ever. And this idea of death produces loss, because it's the belief in a REAL END, a total STOPPING of all existence.

But even physical death does not attain this because death is just a change in form with some symbolism, and even the parts and materials of the body continue on. Death isn't enough in these terms for the ego, it wants more. It wants you to believe you can be TOTALLY ERADICATED from all existence, cast into nothingness, and NEVER RETURN to heaven. Especially never to give way to rebirth or continuation or a new beginning.

Oblivion is the ego's idea of irreversible sin, a death so total that it draws a line in the sand and says, you're gone, you don't exist, and you will never exist again. That isn't what physical death demonstrates, because even the body's materials last in other forms and as energies.

The belief that death IS a total ending, that it is oblivion, and renders a person absolutely cancelled forever, is what gives rise to a sense of despair and loss and hopelessness - no hope of return. And it is this that the ego feeds on - a seeming inescapable nightmare with no way out.

But such things don't exist, and there is nowhere to go to be in oblivion, since nothing is nowhere, and even bodies exist more than this. So there is no death, and no ending, and no cancellation, and no total loss of anything, on any level, ever, physically or spiritually. Physical things just transform, they don't fully stop. And what God created, lives forever.

Dictionary: "The noun oblivion has several meanings, primarily describing a state of being forgotten, unaware, or destroyed. The word comes from the Latin oblivisci, meaning "to forget". "

ACIM: "While it is reasonably satisfied with you, as its reasoning goes, it offers you oblivion. When it becomes overtly savage, it offers you hell."

"The definition of reality is God's, not yours. HE created it, and He knows what it is. You who knew have forgotten. And unless He had given you a way to remember, you would have condemned yourselves to oblivion."

"Such is the ego's version of immortality. And it is THIS the ego's version of time supports. The ego teaches that Heaven is here and now, because the FUTURE is hell. Even when it attacks so savagely that it tries to take the life of someone who hears it temporarily as the ONLY voice, it speaks of hell even to him. For it tells him hell is HERE, and bids him leap from hell into oblivion. The only time the ego allows anyone to look upon, with some amount of equanimity is the PAST. And even then, its only value is that it is no more."

Last night I was talking with Jesus about letting go, and I was thinking the words "I need to surrender" ....and Jesus interjected and changed the word 'surrender' to "let go" .... so then I repeated the modified words. ... I need to let go, except Jesus again interjected and added on some words.... "trying to be God".

And then I was stunned. The realization that I was trying to be God seemed to 'fit' my ego exactly, not just sending me off on some other ego tangent or train of thought, but actually kind of 'disabling' my entire ego for a moment. I felt like I had absolutely no come-back, and no defense. It was true. I felt in myself not just a kind of mental unmasking of myself, but even right down into my torso, as if I've just been stripped bare of all defenses and could do nothing but be stunned from head to toe.

It seemed brilliant, on Jesus's part, to make this observation. The ego - my ego - our egos - really are trying to be God. Our attempt to separate ourselves off form God and to then have various characteristics that would normally be God's characteristics, but without Him, is TOTALLY us trying to be God.

I believe I am God when I am in charge, in control, or having dominion over the world. I believe I'm God by making myself right about things. I believe I'm God by making decisions on my own. I believe I'm God by believing that I know stuff and am informed enough to direct outcomes. I believe I'm God when I think this is 'my own life' and that I am the one who is in charge of it. But it seems more fundamental than this even. It runs to the ego's core.

The ego is literally trying to 'take over' and 'take away from God' everything that God is. It wants to take away God's power, God's fullness, God's mind, God's reality, God's thought system, God's heart, God's eternal life, everything. It wants God not to have it, which means a choice for death, but at the same time, it wants to have all of this for itself without any of the 'conditions' that come with these things - the conditions of Heaven. Or real responsibility.

So I am trying to be God. Holy shit. This doesn't just speak to one portion of 'my life' but to ALL of it. I need to let go of trying to be God. We all do. Can you feel how much of your ego self just 'drops away' when you say this?

I let go of trying to be God.

All the uptight tension and control and fear and attack and manipulation and engagement with stories just falls away when we admit this. And when we do let go of trying to do this... in surrender, and allow God to be God, and allow ourselves to be His creation (not the other way around), the authority problem melts with it.

The authority problem is us attempting to be God, which causes us to be at war with God, and in constant struggles. Letting go of trying to be the one who is God lets go of all of that role-play... it is a heavenly surrender.