Everything about the ego appears to present one way that you can win, and one way that you can lose. It always suggests there's some way to get away with something, to escape the effects of something. To be the victor, to get without giving or give without getting. To be free of problems which still exist, or to find a kind of loophole where, if you just play this game the right way, with skill and education and careful selection, then you'll escape from suffering and find salvation.

Of course it's a bullshit lie.

This world is setup with duality, in which there appear to be "opposites". This is because this world is made from the idea of "an opposite to love" or an opposite to heaven or God. "Earth and heaven are opposites in every way."

It therefore contains opposites. And those opposites *seem* to always be far distant from each other, having nothing in common with each other. Did you fall for that by the way? To the observer, we are blinded by "form", especially given how forms all appears to look different and unalike. Who would suspect an apple and an orange ARE the same thing.

But this is a vast illusion.

The whole point of these oppositions and differences is to get you to believe that there IS a difference, between choosing one thing or choosing another. That some choices are better than others. That if you take this side or that side you will be safer or richer or more successful or less threatened or happier or more spiritual or whatever.

It's a trap folks!

It's a trap because no matter which side you choose, no matter which option, no matter which pill the red one or the blue one, no matter which side of a war you take, no matter who seems to win or lose, no matter how clever you are or how intelligent or how successful you are at navigating the world and making "the best stuff happen", you are LOSING.

You always lose whenever you take any side, whenever you buy into the illusion of differences, whenever you think there is one thing you want in this world more than another. Whether it be that you adore the puppies and kittens and cute babies, moreso than the ugly dogs and cats and old people. Or whether it's that you like your state's teams to win and for the others to fail. Or whether it's that you are right in an argument and the other person is a loser. Or whether you are filthy rich or filthy poor.

ALL of these options are designed to get you to do one thing and one thing only.

To settle for some PART of the world, at the exclusion of the rest, so that you will make that part special (special love) and reject the rest (special hate).

The sole purpose of this to the ego, which has absolutely no concern for whether you choose A or B, is that you choose at all. That you differentiate between illusions. That you become selective and that you want to accept only some thing and not others. That you will take a side and be against something else.

The result of this "choosing between illusions" is that you choose separation. You emphasize the ways that one illusory form is better or worse than another. And this drives a rift inbetween the two. It makes one thing look like a horrible attacking enemy, and another look like a glorious savior or hero.

So we're left with the rather uncomfortable truth, that everything in this world has been designed by the ego to be a losing situation no matter what you choose. No matter which side you're on, or who wins or loses, you still lose. You lose because as soon as you believe the illusion of separations and differences and appearances and forms, you are buying into the ego. And that's an instant loss.

Whether you prefer sunsets or sunrises, the ego has some news for you. Whether you like cats more than dogs or democrats vs republicans, it doesn't matter. If you believe in the difference that appears to distinguish them as opposite to or not the same as each other, you are buying into the ego. And that means you are believing that accepting only part of the whole is better than accepting the whole. So now you've gone from wholeness to partiality, and that's a reduction in how much you there is left, so you just destroyed yourself.

The sorry fact is, this world was set up so that there is NOTHING here that's going to save you. And if you choose any of it, ANY of it at all, you will suffer. This is the deep meaning behind "this world holds nothing that I want". It's also why happy sunsets and kittens are just as much an ego temptation to want to keep some things and not others, to keep you in the dream, and to keep you from wanting God.

Could this world offer you anything that you want, if the TRUE CHOICE is not between crappy bullshit ego substance A, and crappy bullshit ego substance B.... but rather, between ALL of the crap, and God? That's the only real choice you can make. Do I want a world of opposites where nothing is wholly satisfying and you are guaranteed to lose because everything is a compromise/tradeoff, or do you want wholeness and fullness and satisfaction and completeness, with nothing missing and everything welcomed equally?

"Beyond this world there is a world that I want."

"No one can fail who seeks to reach the truth."

"This world holds nothing that I want."

"M-13.4. God's teachers can have no regret on giving up the pleasures of the world. 2 Is it a sacrifice to give up pain? 3 Does an adult resent the giving up of children's toys? 4 Does one whose vision has already glimpsed the face of Christ look back with longing on a slaughter house? 5 No one who has escaped the world and all its ills looks back on it with condemnation. 6 Yet he must rejoice that he is free of all the sacrifice its values would demand of him. 7 To them he sacrifices all his peace. 8 To them he sacrifices all his freedom. 9 And to possess them must he sacrifice his hope of Heaven and remembrance of his Father's Love. 10 Who in his sane mind chooses nothing as a substitute for everything?"

"The miracle-worker begins by PERCEIVING light, and translates HIS perception into sureness by continually extending it, and ACCEPTING ITS ACKNOWLEDGMENT. Its EFFECTS assure him IT IS THERE. The therapist does not heal; he LETS HEALING BE. HE can point to darkness, but he CANNOT bring light OF HIMSELF, for light is NOT of him. But being FOR him, it MUST be for his patient.

The Holy Spirit is the ONLY therapist. He makes healing PERFECTLY clear in ANY situation in which He is the Guide. The human therapist can only LET HIM FULFILL HIS FUNCTION. He needs no help for this. He WILL tell you EXACTLY what to do, to help ANYONE He sends to you FOR help, and will speak to him through you, IF YOU DO NOT INTERFERE. Remember that you ARE choosing a guide for helping, and the wrong choice will NOT help. But remember also that THE RIGHT ONE WILL. Trust Him, for help is His function, and He is of God.

As you awaken other minds TO Him through HIM, and not yourself, you will understand that you are not obeying the laws of this world, but that the laws you ARE obeying WORK. "The good is what works" is a sound though insufficient statement. ONLY the good CAN work. Nothing else works at all. This course is a guide to behavior. Being a very direct and very simple learning situation, it provides the guide who tells you what to do. If you do it, you will SEE that it works. Its RESULTS are more convincing than its words. THEY will convince you that the words are true."

When you are willing to step aside and let the holy spirit work through you, making sure not to interfere, or to even think you need to be the one who makes something happen, this open conduit is a channel through which HE can express healing miracles. As soon as your ego takes over and tries to interfere by trying to "be the one" who is causing the healing, it interrupts the process. Similarly by actively stepping back and allowing and letting go, the Holy Spirit can best utilize your body to heal through.

The exciting challenge we have is to really realize that the Holy Spirit IS HERE as a HEALER AND THERAPIST, and we are supposed to seriously LET HIM fulfill that function , to let HIM do profound things through you, to get out of the way and be nothing more than a conduit through which he performs HIS miracles of healing.

That’s a very different role and function than believing that healing originates with your egoic forcefulness. And it can take a while to learn to stop trying AT ALL and allow and TRUST him to do the miracle. This doesn’t mean "not doing anything at all", you still have to participate. He needs to use your body to move THROUGH to reach others. But HE is the one with the power to cause things to happen, so our job is to be willing to LET HIM do the profound healing work THROUGH us.

This means, standing there with your hands on someone, plugged into the Holy Spirit, trusting him, allowing HIM to do stuff through your body, and recognizing you are doing NOTHING to interfere with HIS expertise. HE knows how to heal anything. YOU DO NOT. You haven’t the first clue how to repair a body. So you don’t be the healer. You just be a doorway through which a true healer moves through you. You let HIM do the work.

This is humbling because it means giving up all effort to BE the one who heals someone. Ironically, paradoxically, when you stop trying to use your ego to heal, trying to force it to happen, and failing, and you give up that entire desire and identity, you are then willing to surrender enough to ALLOW HIM to perform miracles through you.

This means dropping the spiritualized ego, the hero, the performer, the savior,the rescuer, the fixer, the resister, and getting rid of all ego attempts to be a miracle worker. To try doing it yourself and to fail at it, so that you can open up the door to a supernatural power not of this world, and not of you. In a way, you be a miracle worker by letting HIM be the miracle worker.

"BUT DO NOT INTERFERE. The power set in you, in whom the Holy Spirit's goal has been established, is so far beyond your little conception of the infinite, that you have no idea how great the strength that goes with you."

"The holy do not interfere with truth."

"Purification is of God alone (the Holy Spirit), and THEREFORE for you. Rather than seek to prepare YOURSELF for Him, try to think thus:

"I, who am host to God, AM worthy of Him.

He Who ESTABLISHED His dwelling-place in me created it as He would have it be.

It is not needful that I make it ready for Him, but only that I DO NOT INTERFERE with His plan to RESTORE to me my own AWARENESS of my readiness, which is eternal.

I need ADD nothing to His plan.

But to RECEIVE it, I MUST be willing NOT to substitute my own, IN PLACE of it.""

"We thank You, Father, for Your guarantee of only happy outcomes in the end. Help us not interfere, and so delay the happy endings You have promised us for every problem that we can perceive; for every trial we think we still must meet.""

"What the Holy Spirit enables you to do is clearly not of this world."

"The Holy Spirit is the MECHANISM of miracles." (He does them!)

"You cannot see the Holy Spirit, but you can see His manifestations. And unless you do, you will not realize He is there. Miracles are His witnesses, and speak for his Presence. What you cannot see becomes real to you only through the witnesses who speak for it. For you can be AWARE of what you cannot see, and it can become compellingly real to you, as its presence becomes manifest THROUGH you. Do His work, for you SHARE in His function. As your function in Heaven is creation, so your function on earth is healing. God shares His function with you in Heaven, and the Holy Spirit shares His with you on earth."

This is the title of ACIM lesson 125. The essence here is to realize that everything you give, you receive, because giving and receiving are one. Per the golden rule, whatever you "do to another", you literally and directly and personally do to yourself. Anything at all that comes out of you, goes back into you.

This is the law of God, and it is inescapable. But it seems to be very difficult to recognize this law is in effect. It seems possible that you do something to another and experience none of the consequences. That somehow there is a separation between what applies to the giver and the receiver.

The body in particular makes it seem possible to do something to another while escaping the effects. One body can seem to hurt another, and yet come away with no apparent harm. This violates the law of God and seems to suggest the golden rule does not apply. But the laws of God always apply.

If you were aware that anything you do is done to BOTH yourself and others, you would be very careful in choosing what to do. If when you poked another's body, you felt a poke of your own body, you would hesitate to poke them. If you attacked their body and immediately felt the hurt and impact and effects of the attack, you would instantly recoil and reconsider your actions.

If it were impossible for you to do something to another without it also being done instantly to you, you would realize that you cannot do anything harmful without hurting yourself. You would literally find it insane to suggest that you WON'T be hurt when you hurt someone else. You would know this is not true, and that you are guaranteed to suffer when you inflict suffering.

The motivation this gives you then is the clear sanity that, in order to be happy and loved, your only option is to give happiness and love to others. If for an instant you choose to give hurt or to make guilty, you know that you will instantly feel awful and would be quick to stop yourself. If the very dagger with which you attempt to pierce the heart of a brother literally sticks into your own body, you would stop in your tracks.

In truth, when you are more aware of reality, you actually are in touch with this law. It may not appear to apply at the physical level, but it does apply at the level of mind. Any seeming psychological state of attack which you think you project onto another, you do not escape. Any angry attempt to make another guilty reinforces your guilt. Any desire to be murderous and hurtful threatens you and instills fear.

v There IS no escape from the golden rule. The ego counsels that you can easily escape it, even that you can commit the most horrendous attack and come away without remorse or damage. That you can get away with murder. But the only way you would seem to convince yourself that you've done this, is to be in denial.

It requires you to separate yourself off, dis-associate from your brother, form a separate identity which is different and at war, believe that your brother is in no way part of yourself, isolate and imprison yourself in the body, and then perhaps be convinced that your actions won't hurt you. Only by severing yourself from the sonship could you possibly convince yourself that this would work, but at the cost of making you imprisoned and alone.

In truth, your real nature is that you are one with all others. That we are all joined together in sharing as a single family of equality. I am you and you are me and we are each other.

"One brother is all brothers. Every mind contains all minds, for every mind is one. Such is the truth."

Everyone is everyone. We are each individually the whole sonship. Everyone else is a part of your self. Not one single thing can occur against a single individual without it happening to the whole. When one suffers, the whole suffers, because the whole is in every part. We have a holographic relationship and this is the will of God.

The fact is then that if we fall into the ego delusion that we are separate from each other, we will then automatically believe that we can indeed attack without being attacked. And so begins the spiral down the slippery slope to hell in which you believe and then perceive that you are justified in murder, capable of revenge, and can get away with it unaffected. This state of mind itself is mental illness, suffering, self-attack, self-abuse, and self-destructive.

The simple truth then is that everything you give, you are included in the receipt of. Anything you do, you do to yourself. Anything you give or radiate or share or express, is being expressed toward you as well. It may seem on the physical level that something has to leave and travel and be sacrificed and lost, in order to be given or done to another, but in truth you always keep what you

give, because sharing is reality and not separation. To receive what you give is the golden rule and the inescapable law of God. It is functioning even when you don't believe it is functioning. It is functioning when you believe you are getting away with separating yourself off from receiving. It is also the secret of salvation, in the recognition that if you are suffering, you must have done this to yourself. You must have given suffering and then received it, believing that you would escape the receipt.

If you are suffering, you have attempted to attack the sonship. Not just yourself, but everyone. But just as every attack thought, and attitude, angry guilt-mongering, or outright violence, is always an attempt to give yourself death. It makes you unhappy to make others unhappy. It hurts you to hurt them. You cannot escape this. Anything you do to attempt to destroy a son of God will have self-inflicted repercussions. And as such, if you are not at peace, you must have made a wrong decision.

To find salvation therefore we have to learn the simplicity of lesson 125 - that at all times, what I am giving I am receiving. If I do not like what I am experiencing, I must recognize I have chosen it and have given it, and have therefore received it. And I have done this to myself. I must be mistaken if I have given myself suffering, and I made the decision myself, but I want to choose otherwise because I want to be at peace.

This is all tied together. It is the one law of God that everything is always shared, everyone is always included, and you will never escape the consequences of your giving. If want to stop suffering, learn to stop making others suffer. If you want to be happy, give happiness. If you want to feel loved, learn to love. You will heal as you let the Holy Spirit teach you to heal. And you will find God in your brother as you learn that your brother is a part of your shared identity in Christ.

A belief in separation takes place within your own mind. Your own mind becomes divided. A portion of your will goes into one part and the rest into another. Eventually this forms the conscious self and the unconscious self.

Separation leads to a splitting out of cause from effect, receiving from giving, and other from self. But because it splits the will, it results in two opposing wills which do not see things the same way.

"Being in two minds" means having an ego mind - a divided mind at war with itself. It must produce indecision and an inability to resolve conflict. It in fact must produce conflict, because one part of will is acting to cancel out the other. This creates a standoff, or a stalemate, or a situation of simultaneous push and pull.

The result of two wills acting against one another in opposite directions is that they will cancel the effects of each other and create a paralysis. One will tries to move in a given direction, the other will stops it. The other will tries to move in a given direction, the first will stops it. Nothing happens.

With two opposing wills trying to operate at the same time, there must conflict - an inner war with yourself. You will thwart everything you try to express. This conflict is literally the same thing as insanity, because the single whole mind is attempting to achieve two opposite and incompatible goals at the same time. It produces impossibility - which is the opposite of the possible. Miracles are another name for possibility. And with God, all things are possible.

When you are in this world and are in two minds, ie you have an ego and therefore two wills, you are literally against yourself. You are experiencing self attack. Your will and ambitions will be thwarted, sabotaged and undermined. You will become "stuck", ineffective, powerless and frozen.

Ultimately this leads to fear which will stop you in your tracks. Fear is a state of intensely experiencing separation between yourself and yourself, where one part of you seems like you and the rest seems like a separate enemy. Fear is paralyzing. It puts a freeze on action, it strips both parts of mind of all power, collapses the power of will and is an attempt to extinguish yourself.

No wonder then that when your mind is split, you cannot manifest miracles, you cannot see yourself as sharing God's power, you do not see yourself as causal, and every time you try to even perform a miracle it becomes thwarted and nothing seems to happen. You get used to this mode of being un-mraculous, believing it is normal to have no power over anything.

The only reason you can't make objects move, raise the dead, heal the sick, levitate or whatever else, is because your mind and heart is not WHOLE, with a single focus or goal. It is divided against itself. You try to cause stuff to happen, but the rest of you tries to stop it.

A simple example is that you attempt to produce a miracle but you "ask" for something to change, you fear that it won't change, you have doubt about seeing results, you look to form to change to see if something worked, and generally undermine yourself. You waver. You lose sight of the truth. You listen to other people's doubts and buy into the appearance that it isn't working. You listen to the ego. And this basically cancels your efforts.

But you'll think that all of these things are happening against your will or that you're really trying hard to make this miracle happen. PART of you is. ONE of your wills is. But you have another separated will - part 2 - which you are still actually USING, albeit largely unconsciously, to sabotage your efforts.

Your belief in fear splits your will. Your belief in a lack of authority splits your will. Your belief in not being completely causal, or not having power over anything, splits your mind. If your mind becomes split like this, you are literally working against yourself. One hand is reaching to express a miracle, the other quickly wrestles with it and stops it. Not physically, but in your mind and perception.

To work miracles requires an allegiance to the truth, and a loyalty and clarity about staying true to it no matter what illusions present. Holding fast regardless of things appearing to not work, or even if they seem to become worse. Is it the truth? No. But if you take it in and make it real, that's you using the other half of your will against yourself.

The only reason that a miracle won't happen, effectively, is because you stopped being causal and turned yourself into an effect. You paralyzed yourself - dis-empowered yourself. It is your false perceptions which strip you of your sharing of God's power. You can't work miracles when you're divided against yourself and thus God. It's like asking God to stop flowing. It means you do not really know what you want, and uncertainty does not produce the certainty of God's power.

Another way of saying that is that when your mind/will is split, you are asking for two things at once, which is like asking for nothing clearly at all. So you get nothing, or you "mis-create", and end up with effects that you don't think you asked for.

When you "ask" by focusing on only one thing, wholly and clearly, it must be given you. Therefore realize if the only thing stopping your miracles was your own divided will, once your will, mind and heart are whole, you will not stop yourself, and no-one else has any power to do so either. Anything is possible.

Being so used to having a split will, which renders us practically powerless and inept, we are not accustomed to being solely causal. We are not used to the power of the mind when it is expresses in one direction, with one intention, one focus, one belief, one thought, one love. We are not accustomed to giving and receiving being one. And we are not used to having so much authority over illusions.

The mind has massive creative power. It never stops being creative, Jesus says. It's just that we keep using it against itself and thus keep mis-creating, producing effects which conflict with part of what we asked for, or we create things which attack ourselves, or things which seem unwanted or a mistake. There are no mistakes. You ARE getting what you're asking for, it's just that you keep asking from a confused state of not really knowing what you want.

What happens when you cause and you do not stop yourself? You create. That's what produces miracles, manifestations, signs, healings, wonders, etc. Jesus was masterful at this, coming from such a state of pure love that He could express all of God's power, undivided, certain, with great authority, and there was nothing He could not do. You can be this way also.

I asked Holy Spirit how better to produce miracles. He said, "be truth." Truth is absolute. All or nothing. Commitment. Certainty. Confidence. Authority. Power.

"Forgiveness recognizes what you thought your brother did to you HAS NOT OCCURRED. It does not pardon sins and make them real. It sees there was no sin. And in that view are all your sins forgiven. What is sin, except a false idea about God's Son? Forgiveness merely sees its falsity, and therefore lets it go. What then is free to take its place is now the Will of God.

An unforgiving thought is one which makes a judgment that it will not raise to doubt, although it is not true. The mind is closed, and will not be released. .......

Forgiveness, on the other hand, is still, and quietly does nothing. It offends no aspect of reality, nor seeks to twist it to appearances it likes. It merely looks, and waits, and judges not. He who would not forgive must judge, for he must justify his failure to forgive. But he who would forgive himself must learn to welcome truth exactly as it is.

Do nothing, then, and let forgiveness show you what to do, through Him Who is your Guide, your Savior and Protector, strong in hope, and certain of your ultimate success. He has forgiven you already, for such is His function, given Him by God. Now must you share His function, and forgive whom He has saved, whose sinlessness He sees, and whom He honors as the Son of God."

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Notice that forgiveness is a state of mind in which there is nothing to forgive. It isn't so much a "doing". It is still and looks and judges not. It doesn't say, "well, I see a bunch of unforgiven or unforgiveable stuff over there, I have to do a forgiveness."

Forgiveness is only forgiveness when it is complete. It is the same thing as the state of atonement in which nothing real has happened. It's the state of mind of the Holy Spirit with perfect correct perception and a clear vision of and acceptance of God's truth.

This truth exists kind of on an entirely other "level" of mind, which you need to find your way to become aware of. When you are IN that mind, you are forgiving, as in, have a forgiving attitude, and see no wrong. The steps you take to get TO that mind, are NOT forgiveness itself. They are steps of undoing false perceptions and beginning to take back the errors that you made. Judgements. Your unforgiving attitude.

Transitioning from an unforgiving, judging, condemning attitude, to one of forgiveness, seems like a process, with a practical application of principles and various corrections that are needed. But that process isn't itself forgiveness, because forgiveness is the FINAL state you get to when the process of complete. It's the restored state of mind which has a forgiving attitude and sees that there is nothing TO forgive, because real sin has not happened. The steps you take to get there, are a process of purification.

I never really understood this until recently. I always believed that if I was taking some steps to forgive people, or later to forgive myself, ie taking back projection and so on, that I was "doing forgiveness". To a degree I was taking steps TOWARD forgiveness. But I also noticed that I did not always take it all the way to the atonement. And since forgiveness IS the atonement, as a state of mind, I clearly was not reaching all the way to that state of mind. And so, effectively, I was only really doing the first PARTS of the undoing of judgement, and not taking it all the way to complete forgiveness.

Still, it was practice, and it was part of the process of learning what forgiveness is, and how to reach it. Forgiveness truly sees, experientially, that there IS nothing to forgive. So if I'm in the mode of "I need to forgive this", that isn't actually forgiveness. I need to get OUT of the mode of believing that there is something unforgiven, because that is contrary to what forgiveness sees. That's still judgement. A partial forgiveness, as a mix of judgement and attempted correction, which ALSO is the spiritual ego which attempts to keep some part of judgement real while trying to undo it.

Until we can take our process of purification all the way to the atonement and to the mind of forgiveness, where we can accept the truth that there is no real sin and nothing has happened, we have not really completed a full forgiveness. And if we stop short of that each time, if we don't completely undo all of the perceptual errors that fall short of the atonement, then we're still in a state of judgement. We haven't fully uprooted the problem, and so it will "grow back" over time. A belief that sin is real will keep producing more guilt, which will produce more fear and punishment and death. It has to be COMPLETELY uprooted by accepting the truth of the atonement.

Over time I think we gradually chisel away at it and perhaps become more willing to take the process further. And especially early on we might simply not be able to go deeper with this because maybe all we can do is grasp at sometimes taking back projections of guilt and taking on some ownership. And our mind might be so cluttered with ego that it takes quite a long time to keep chipping away at that mindset to be able to more quickly and consistently see that that's what we're doing.

Then it takes yet more time to chisel away at the belief that we ourselves are guilty or sinful, before getting close to what forgiveness really is. Simply because or thought system is so filled with ego that a lot of confusion and delusion has to be undone before you can even catch your first glimpse of the atonement. Not that we're doing anything wrong. It's just a learning process. But we do need to make sure that we're at some point going to fully embrace what the atonement says, in order to truly achieve forgiveness.

When you can get your awareness to where you understand, see, accept, believe, and are experiencing, a state of mind in which you know there IS nothing to forgive because there has not been any real sin and nothing can have really happened, only then are you accepting the atonement and being truly forgiving. Seeing that you HAVE NOT sinned at all, that your innocence has NOT been corrupted, that God's love has always been present for you, and that you ARE still worthy of it because you and others have not separated from God at all, that's the "peak" of the forgiveness "process".

The recognition that forgiveness is already DONE, accomplished, and complete, BECAUSE nothing ever happened in reality and truth that requires forgiving.

"Forgiveness recognizes what you thought your brother did to you HAS NOT OCCURRED" - ACIM --- it has not occurred because the world is not REAL, and everything you ever thought had gone wrong was JUST an illusion and nothing more. Nothing has really happened, there is no real sin, you are STILL innocent in God's eyes, and are worthy of His love.

Going into a questioning mode, in which you ask yourself, should I do this or shouldn't I.... is actually a movement into fear.

As soon as you're in this mode of perception, there is no way you're going to settle on a peaceful decision.

You'll think that deciding one way will bring you peace, except that.. you can't get the other way out of your mind. And then you think if you decide the other way, maybe that will bring you what you want, except that, the first solution still seems to have something about it that the other doesn't.

Always in this mode of fear, it is a mode of duality, where your mind is split in two and you can't "make up" your mind - because you HAVE 'made up' a mind - an ego mind, which is now trying to rectify the fact that it has to deal with two different and unrelated options.

By perceiving differences, you are fixating on the appearance that one option has something about it that the other does not, and these differences are what MAKE the two options seem like two distinct options. And yet, as soon as you see this and try to deal with it, you cannot possibly see any kind of certainty, truth, clarity, obviousness or lack of confusion.

There is no sane way to choose between these two different paths, at least not from within a position of choosing. When you're weighing up your options, what you're really doing is trying to decide whether to accept what's missing about one of the two things, versus whats missing about the other. And the fact that they are both incomplete, can only leave you uncertain and unconvinced.

The only way out of this confusion, which masquerades as very careful decision making - on your own, in isolation - but really is a movement AWAY from decision and certainty, is to entirely STOP this whole deception of choosing between things. When you are questioning what to do, you are questioning YOURSELF, and throwing yourself into fear and confusion needlessly. "My attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability." - ACIM

There is no way you can choose between things, because that requires separation and rejection and you will never be able to experience certainty or peace while separation is operating.

The only way to peace is to entirely step back out of the 'split' between options, to back off from being in a position of trying to know, or trying to figure out. You even need to get past the illusion that a decision even needs to be made, because the sense of NEED has entirely come from the very same FEAR that you have entered into, which has CAUSED you to think that you have to decide something in the first place. "Let my recognize my problems have been solved." - ACIM

You have to RECOGNIZE that what you are trying to do is impossible, and that's why you will be confused and frustrated. You need to see this deception for what it is - not two clear-cut choices, but a device for indecision, fear, egocentric control, and trying to know everything on your own.

You can't know everything when your mind is split. So when you are in this decision-making mode of selecting between things, you are not only choosing which of two things is "better", you're also choosing which of two IDENTITIES you want to associate with. And that means you are literally putting your SELF into one of two boxes.

Once you're inside boxes, or are attempting to hide in boxes in the name of getting out of a box, you can no longer see clearly and won't be able to feel the sense of relief and peace that comes from being OUTSIDE the box.

So really there is absolutely no way that your ego (split mind) can make a decision on its own and be certain or happy with it. Either you struggle and seek for truth in only one part of existence and not another, causing you to be inherently insane, or you stop trying to decide on your own.

Decisions can still be made from a vantage point outside of this split mind, where you join with Holy Spirit and see the whole situation as one, recognizing the temptation of the illusion of deciding for yourself and ceasing to enter into it. Then Holy Spirit can share His light and freedom with you, to instill a knowing, inspiration or guidance - a peace-based decision - which you CAN trust and feel certain about.

As Jesus says in the Course, seek not to make decisions about doing something you do not want to do, because it will only make you afraid.

You need to learn to notice when you've slipped into a "I don't know if I should" mode, or a "what should I do" mode, or a "I can't decide mode", which pretends to be decision-making, because it means you've gone into the ego split mind and cannot possibly decide anything. You are AFRAID, and for no real reason.

Questions are doubts. They are not real questions. This is why the tiny mad idea was a movement AWAY from knowing and truth, towards "questioning truth", i.e. entering into fear and doubt, in an attempt to pretend that you're looking for an answer, while using that excuse as a cover-up for actually moving AWAY from the answer.

Ego questions do not lead you to truth. They lead you to more illusions, and you will never find happiness or peace of mind there.

So stop yourself if you notice you're being indecisive. No matter what your ego mind says - for or against certain options - do not listen to ANY of the arguments or cases for or against anything. They are all deceptions, because the overall deception is you believing that you NEED to decide at all.

You only think you need to decide when you've become afraid, and really then you're in a state of fear, trying to decide something in order to gain relief from fear, but every effort to do so will just make you more afraid.

Imagine all the wonderful things you will actually achieve and 'do' and feel good about and act fearlessly on, when you're moving and flowing with Holy Spirit's truth and trust and awareness, instead of trying to be "sure" about what "you" need to do with "your" life.

What you will realize eventually, as is dawning on me now, is that maybe there isn't even a decision to be made, and maybe moving into decision-making is actually just fear and undermining yourself with your ego, and you need to stop doing THAT, because that is the real problem here, not what option to choose.

I thank Jesus for this clarification today, and for reminding me when I am questioning whether I'm doing the right thing, thinking that this means I have to decide all over again what to do, I need to recognize the real problem - I've entered into fear and have attacked myself, and that's the only reason I seem to be separated from truth. To return to truth I do not NEED to make this illusory decision, I need to stop listening to my own bullshit.

This morning Jesus told me to "listen". So I just lay there and focused on listening. My thoughts stopped. It was at times difficult to maintain extreme focus on listening intently, particularly without anything to listen "to". My mind kept getting lost agains in ego dreams and thinking. Then I'd come back to it.

Listening very intently stops all thoughts. It also makes you more present.

Then something else happened. Holy Spirit said, "receive". So while maintaining this listening state, I allowed myself to receive. This means, receiving without necessarily 'giving' anything. Allowing God to come to me. I immediately felt Holy Spirit's presence in my body which then proceeded to shake and stuff as Holy Spirit healed me. Each time I allowed myself to stop, listen, and receive, another wave came.

Here's why listening and receiving seem so alien to the ego, and why it stops ego thoughts.

Your mind in its natural state is supposed to receive everything from God. It is a receptive device. It's willingness to listen to everything God is sharing and to be open to it keeps it plugged into love. It is supposed to receive a constant broadcast of love, all the way into the deepest depths of the soul.

This is simple cause and effect. God is cause, God creates and sustains you forever, you are the effect of God and so it is completely natural for your soul to simply receive whatever God is creating you to be.

This openness to receive God, to allow God, puts the mind into its natural state of extension, where it receives input from God and then broadcasts it, like a repeater. It allows God to flow through it and express love outward, increasing the love and joy.

But in the separation idea, something happened.

Another way to think of separation is that we tried to unplug ourselves from God's input, to stop listening to His Voice, to stop receiving His love, and to run off with our hands over our ears trying not to acknowledge, allow or be open to receiving the truth. It was an attempt to shut out the 'cause' of ourselves and to pretend that we ourselves are our own cause.

This does something unnatural to the mind.

Without input coming from God, the mind starts 'inventing' inputs. It starts to dream. It makes stuff up. And since what it is making up is not love, all of this dreaming produces ego thoughts and forms. "All thoughts produce form at some level." So now instead of simply radiating silence, or peace, or love or joy, the mind starts making "noise". This noise takes the form of ego thinking.

So ego thinking then is, in every case, an attempt to run away from God, to not listen to God, to not RECEIVE, and to instead try to give without receiving. This is because in the separation, ego separated giving from receiving. It actually is trying to give give give all the time (because it is sacrificial), but without receiving, because it wants deprivation and lack.

So the ego-driven mind is very good at making noise, broadcasting, giving without receiving, creating lack, inventing thoughts and dreams, and making illusions. It is all symptomatic of being unplugged from God and not receiving God as input.

So what happens is, if you focus on listening, ALL of your ego thoughts will go silent. Very automatically. You don't need to thought-watch or try to transcend them or stop them or whatever. They are only happening because the mind is not listening to God. So as you put all your focus on God, all your problems are solved and the mind automatically stops inventing stuff.

All of the ego's thoughts are mind wandering. And mind wandering means, allowing mind to take you away from yourself and away from God. This means going into ego thinking, making illusions, believing separation, and stopping receiving. If you did not "wander away" from yourself, ie yourself in God, you would not have any ego thoughts - OR any ego at all.

Essentially this is the ONLY meditation that works, because there is only one problem - separation from God, and only one solution, rejoining your mind with God and putting your mind back in service to spirit. ie being willing to receive God's will and extend it, rather than willing against it.

It is very easy and simple and very powerful. Just put all your attention on listening. Listening means you are shutting up and stopping making noise and being quiet and allowing something else to have it's say. It means you are willing to stop being the author of illusions, and to receive reality - what it wants to tell you it is rather than your ideas about it.

Whether you listen to sounds or not does not matter. But even if there are sounds and if you put all your focus on listening to them, that is helpful too. Not much different to transcendental meditation where you focus on one thing. But you don't even need something to focus on.

You are basically focusing on God. On allowing God to express to you, whereby you listen to that expression and thus receive it. Listening and receiving are the same thing. This is also how you get in touch with spiritual guidance.

"If you do not hear the voice for God it is because you do not choose to listen."

When you surrender and listen, and become open to receive, it can seem as if you are being selfish by ONLY receiving. But try it. Allow God to come to YOU, rather than you doing all the "seeking". "Be still, and know that I am God." Just allow yourself to receive God's love, let Him love you, let the love come to you, and simply absorb it. Without needing to express anything, nor even trying to extend it.

We have become SO used to not receiving that we think we're supposed to do something in order to earn or be entitled to something. You don't. God would love you regardless of whether you do anything. Just be still and listen and let yourself receive from God.

I think I posted about this a while ago and called it "God bathing"... like sunbathing, you just soak up God and receive the warmth. Like recharging a battery before use. It feels great to let yourself receive love. Especially to allow yourself to be loved without you having to do anything, recognizing you are worthy of that. It actually makes you feel VULNERABLE. Exposed to God. Allowing God into your innermost private areas. Soak up the love. It will heal you.

And, if you are willing, to receive God's love, you might also invite Holy Spirit to enter you at that time, and He really can go to town healing you. There are major miracles of healing waiting for you to receive if you will just surrender and be willing to let it come to you. This is also the key to abundance.

One time, I was exploring my relationship to the holy spirit and it occurred to me that perhaps I was misunderstanding by presuming he was "separate from me", since I always heard him as a separate voice. And this idea came to me that maybe he was not separate and that this separation between us wasn't there. This seemed harmless enough but this opened me up to the idea that I was now "exposed" to the holy spirit without any defenses or blocks or separations or walls, and my ego did not like that one bit.

The ego in me, which was playing with this idea but not really dropping the deeper walls, interpreted this to mean that the holy spirit had "access" to me (to my ego-identified self) and that this meant he could do anything to me and I would have no defense or way to stop it. I wasn't ready to accept this level of openness without the trust that's needed. I felt that if there was nothing to stop him, the fact he proves there is no ego would dissolve me and was therefore *perceived as* an attack or threat. Of course the holy spirit wasn't doing anything of the sort but that's how I interpreted it.

Instantly, within a split second, and without thinking of it at all, my mind attempted to push him away, or rather, to recoil. To distance myself from him by trying to increase the "gap" between us, trying to hide deeper in the body, and to try to go into denial/resistance/blockage to shut him out. The only defense really was the attempt to block my AWARENESS of him. This happened really quickly and I could really feel this recoil in fear. It's not something I "figured out" it's just something I did automatically. I saw the need for a defense to keep me (my ego self) "safe" from this threat of unity. I actually felt scared of what the holy spirit was going to do to me.

Within an hour, my head became congested, my ears started ringing, they became quite blocked, I was starting to get sinus drainage etc. This came on really quickly. Of course, I did not recognize that I had induced this myself, or chosen it. I was doing what is described here in "sickness is a defense against the truth":

"Sickness is not an accident. Like all defenses, it is an insane device for self-deception. And like all the rest, its purpose is to hide reality, attack it, change it, render it inept, distort it, twist it, or reduce it to a little pile of unassembled parts. The aim of all defenses is to keep the truth from being whole. The parts are seen as if each one were whole within itself.

Defenses are not unintentional, nor are they made without awareness. They are secret magic wands you wave when truth appears to threaten what you would believe. They seem to be unconscious but because of the rapidity with which you choose to use them. In that second, even less, in which the choice is made, you recognize exactly what you would attempt to do, and then proceed to think that it is done."

"Sickness is a decision. It is not a thing that happens to you quite unsought, which makes you weak and brings you suffering. It is a choice you make, a plan you lay when for an instant truth arises in your own deluded mind, and all your world appears to totter and prepare to fall. Now are you sick that truth may go away, and threaten your establishments no more."

So by the time the hour was up, my BODY was sick. I was not aware I'd caused it or the cause-effect relationship of the event with holy spirit versus what the body was doing. I just thought I was getting sick out of the blue. I started looking ELSEWHERE for causes, wondering if it was something I ate, something I contracted, some emotions coming up, whatever. I then proceeded to suffer with blocked ears, trouble hearing, ringing in the ears, headaches, sinus congestion, for the next couple of days. And you can bet not one single idea of what caused it was related to that event. In effect, the defense is put in place to shut OUT awareness and this blockage causes you to not be AWARE that you CHOSE the defense for this exact purpose to try to make the threat go away.

After a couple days of suffering - and my hearing issues were basically a symbolic representation of "I don't want to hear this truth", I started trying to figure out when it started. I realized that it started right around when I was having that interaction with the holy spirit. And then fortunately I remembered that it had frightened me. And so then I was able to put two and two together and realized that, or at least was open to the possibility, that maybe I had chosen this as a reaction to him. I also was not on "speaking terms" with the holy spirit at this point because I was feeling afraid and did not feel safe or trusting of him, so he hadn't been saying anything.

I started to tentatively realize that I needed to get past this fear. I needed somehow to find a way to re-approach the holy spirit again, without being afraid, having some kind of TRUST, and to find a way to relate to him in terms of that openness to him without it MEANING that I was threatened or under attack. I needed a different way of looking at it so that I wouldn't misperceive our "unity" as a dangerous thing. So I became willing, and I started to try to deliberately trust and to take baby steps towards communicating with him again. And as I did, I was willing to put aside the fear that had been induced.

When I did this, I saw clearly that I had created this defense as a way to try to protect myself and out of fear. And since I could now be willing to more carefully trust the holy spirit and not fear him, it became obvious that I had NO MORE NEED for this protection. Like, it was okay to let down my guard.

Within an hour, all the symptoms vanished completely.

"Healing will flash across your open mind as peace and truth arise to take the place of war and vain imaginings. "

"There will be no dim figures from your dreams, nor their obscure and meaningless pursuits with double purposes insanely sought, remaining in your mind. It will be healed of all the sickly wishes that it tried to authorize the body to obey."

"Now is the body healed because the source of sickness has been opened to relief. "

"No-one can heal unless he understands what purpose sickness seems to serve. For then he understands as well its purpose has no meaning. Being causeless and without a meaningful intent of any kind, it cannot be at all. When this is seen, healing is automatic. It dispels this meaningless illusion by the same approach that carries all of them to truth, and merely leaves them there to disappear."

The secret of salvation tells you "you're doing this to yourself". ACIM also tells you "you but accuse your brother of your own sins." It also tells you that you "look within first" and then project outward, producing perception.

So the thing is, you START by attacking yourself first, accusing your self of sin. Then you look within. Then you project your own sin out. Then you find yourself in a situation where you seem to have to "forgive someone else", or at least begin the process of realizing it's not about them, taking back the projection, and then looking at why YOU are innocent.

But really most of the time we spend in undoing all this projected crap, it's not really even the original problem. The original problem is that we do not love ourselves. We attack ourselves. We have judged and condemned ourselves. We've believed ourselves to be unworthy of love and forgiveness. And it's only later that this becomes projected onto the world and other people, which produces a mess we have to then clean up before we can even home in on the real issue.

If you think about it, your only job then really involves the forgiving of YOUR SELF, which would automatically remove the need to project sin onto others in the first place. Your SELF ATTACK needs to be undone, in order to have no sin TO project. And if you are not experiencing love, it is because you have not forgiven YOUR SELF. You have blocks to the awareness of love's presence because you do not believe you deserve to be loved. You don't love other people because you hate yourself first.

Forgiveness is not really complete until you return to a state of love, whether it seems to be about another person or yourself. Only when you can love the person that was an enemy, are you fully done forgiving them, and now welcome them with open arms. If you do not love yourself, it's because you have not forgiven yourself fully. Which means that you have grievances against yourself. You have beliefs about your own sinfulness. You are convinced of your own unworthiness and are hurting yourself.

If you were to address this actual problem, this inner self hatred, this suicidal self-abuse, the secret sins and hidden hates, not even on a basis of feeling guilty about accusing your brother of it, it would clear everything up. Jesus says you don't have to seek for love, you just need to remove the barriers you've built against it. Those barriers are barriers against YOU, against loving yourself. They are within you. And it's only later that you project them as a hellish world in ways that interfere with your relationships.

You are the one who needs to forgive, and you are the one who needs to be forgiven. By yourself. You need to learn to stop unloving yourself. You need to find out all the ways that you do not love yourself or are unwilling to do so. And they will indicate all the ways that you do not want to love others because YOU do not believe YOU deserve to receive love. And then you need to undo that belief so that you can recognize your entitlement to love.

Miracles function by applying to both YOU AND another. And so your unwillingness or inability to love another is only evidence of your unwillingness to love yourself. You would have to love yourself at the same time as loving them, and so you do not love them, because to love them you'd have to love yourself. And so you hold back your love of others because you don't want to love yourself. You are unwilling to love yourself because you hate yourself. And Jesus tells us not to underestimate the sheer extent of this hatred.

Ultimately though, the key is, that by recognizing you do this attack to yourself, the secret of salvation can offer you a way out. By healing your relationship WITH YOURSELF, by allowing yourself to receive love, by loving your own self first, you will automatically see the world differently. You will see a forgiven world only because YOU are forgiven. You will see forgiven brothers only because YOU have forgiven yourself. You will see a reflection of God in the world ONLY because within you you have no sin and guilt and God (love) is accepted as present in your mind, and so is projected onto the world.

It seems incredibly simple when you get down to it. So much ego time is spent lost and confused and caught up in external problems and other people and dramas and all these projected forms of your own self attack, such that it makes it seem most of the time it's not even about you. But its ONLY YOU that needs to get healed FIRST, to accept atonement FOR YOUR SELF, so that you can in turn be available to heal and help others. To offer love to them, you have to have love to give, and you can't have love to give when you don't acknowledge your own lovability.

You don't even really need to deal with trying to "forgive others" or to "forgive the world" or to "be more loving toward people". What you really need to focus on is getting your self to be more loved, by YOU. To find out why your relationship WITH YOURSELF is broken. To find out why and where you hate yourself, how you are denying yourself, and why you don't want to admit to being God's beloved child. All the rest is an ego distraction and a form of denial, an attempt to pass the buck and make the problem be outside your mind so that your own self attack remains hidden.

When YOUR mind gets corrected, your PERCEPTION will get corrected too. "Perception is a RESULT, not a cause". Perception doesn't even need to be "worked on". There is a massive amount of distraction with people thinking that they have to fix and shift their perception. You cannot DIRECTLY shift perception because it is a SIDE EFFECT. Spiritual perception is a RESULT of fixing YOUR BELIEFS about YOURSELF. It's what you sense AFTER you have looked within and have projected your inner world outward. As a man thinketh, about himself, so does he perceive.

This is all an inside job. YOUR MIND has shit in it that needs healing. All the world related to your self and the healing of yourself is entirely within you. You can use holy relationships or guidance or whatever else help along the way but ultimately, simplifying it greatly, Jesus is just asking you to 1) get yourself back to love and 2) then you'll share that love with others automatically.

Love goes out automatically because of its nature, and you don't even need to make it do that. It has its own function to do that. You just need to stop blocking it. And you do that by forgiving yourself for what YOU have not done. When you see your own sinlessness you'll see the sinlessness of your brother. When you see your own innocence you will see his. Once you do that, the rest will take care of itself. Seek the Kingdom of God within you and the whole world will be made forgiven.

The purpose of learning is to learn that there is nothing to learn. The purpose of change is to change the mind from its belief in change so that it recognises that we are changeless and have not changed. Learning is a strange somewhat paradoxical state. Before the separation it wasn't "needed", but technically in truth it's supposed to lead to a state where you realize you have no needs and therefore there is nothing to learn.

The recognition of identification with Christ realising that you have always been Christ and always will be and are Christ now and forever ... undoes the "need to learn". After all learning is supposed to END when you HAVE learned or attain the state of completion. But the fact is the learning itself does not produce the state of Christ. Learning is not about putting in place or accumulating knowledge, it is about uncovering knowledge and truth that God already put in place. Learning is not a cause. God put the state of Christ in place. The learning just takes you close to it so that you can realize you can drop the learning - and the course - and just be what you are.

It can take a lot of "traditional learning" to get to a point where you are willing to recognize and accept that you're already perfect and have no needs. Buddha for example went through a lot of hassle trying to starve himself and deprive himself in attempts to wake up, but then realised they essentially "didnt' work" and were themselves a hinderance, ie the learning was getting in the way of achievement, and once he recognized nothing worked he dropped it all and woke up to the Christ state in which he recognized (enlightenment) that he didn't really need any of that stuff because he was "already enlightened."

It is always the ego that drives us to "learn" due to its view that you are fundamentally lacking in some way and therefore have a NEED, and the need compels you to SEEK and do not find, by looking for what is missing everywhere other than where it seems to be missing. The truth is that you are not lacking or in need at all, and the sense of lack is itself a LIE or a false learning, something you taught yourself which is untrue. And this learning has to be UN-LEARNED, which is the un-doing of the atonement, in order to reveal the fact and truth that what you thought you needed to learn or acquire you ALREADY HAVE. And thus you have no real need to seek to find it.

In fact, having a "spiritual path" is a way of taking you away from yourself and away from the perfection you already have, in an attempt to find it through external saviours and idols and various other distractions. We seem to need paths and spiritual growth and becomings and learnings and accumulations and transformations and healing UNTIL the point at which we realize that we don't NEED it, and are already complete and finished and whole. And then we can drop it. But without the learning we might not get TO that state of recognizing it's not needed, due to the fact that we BELIEVE IN the "need" to learn at the moment.

What is healing but being restored to the recognition that there is nothing that needs healing because God already gave you wholeness? And what is forgiveness other than the recognition that there is nothing to forgive because there has been no sin in reality? And what is atonement but the recognition that everything is still as God created it and has not changed and has no need for fixing?

And so we "seem to need" a course in miracles or other paths to get to the point where it undoes itself. After all the whole point of the course is really ultimately to make itself unnecessary - as any good teacher would - which is also the real purpose of the body and all learning and also the world. They are just devices designed to point us in the right direction and when we ARRIVE here and now in the Christ present state reality we can be done with all this stuff and just be in heaven with God.

We don't really need the world, the body, space, time, perception, healing, miracles, teaching, learning, correction, undoing, or anything else. But we seem to need them to get TO the awareness that we don't need them. They are then simply signposts and devices which ultimately render themselves completely unnecessary.

They do not put the truth in place, they merely point toward it, so that we might one day suddenly remember what we always knew - only God's kingdom and reality are true and nothing else has ever gone wrong. You're not supposed to be stuck in a state of learning forever, or in a state of "doing the course" forever. You're supposed to graduate from learning and no longer need anything. Eventually you will drop the course when its purpose is complete.

"Why wait for Heaven? Those who seek the light are merely covering their eyes. The light is in them now. Enlightenment is but a recognition, not a change at all."

"The Garden of Eden, which is described as a literal garden in the Bible, was not originally an actual garden at all. It was merely a mental state of complete need-lack. Even in the literal account, it is noteworthy that the pre-Separation state was essentially one in which man needed nothing."

"Infinite patience calls upon infinite Love, and by producing results NOW renders time unnecessary."

"A miracle has thus the unique property of abolishing time by rendering the space of time it occupies unnecessary."

"The miracle is much like the body, in that both are learning aids which aim at facilitating a state in which they are unnecessary. When the Soul is finally in the original state of direct communication, neither the body nor the miracle serves any purpose."

"The physical world exists only because man can use it to correct his UNBELIEF, which placed him in it originally. As long as man KNEW he did not need anything, the whole device was unnecessary."

"The Holy Spirit interprets time's PURPOSE as rendering the need for it UNNECESSARY."

"Long ago we said that the Holy Spirit shares the goal of all good teachers, whose ultimate aim is to make themselves unnecessary, by teaching their pupils all they know."

"Vigilance DOES require effort, but only to teach you that effort ITSELF is unnecessary."

"The whole value of right perception lies in the inevitable judgment which it necessarily entails that it is UNNECESSARY."

"Healing was an ability which was lent to man after the Separation, before which it was completely unnecessary. Like all aspects of the space-time belief, healing ability is temporary."

"But, as we have said before, all teaching devices in the hands of good teachers are aimed at rendering themselves unnecessary."

"The ultimate purpose of the body is to render itself unnecessary. Learning to do this is the only real reason for its creation."

"This in no way contradicts the changelessness of mind as GOD created it. But YOU think that you HAVE changed it, as long as you learn through the ego. This DOES place you in a position of needing to learn a lesson which SEEMS contradictory: you must learn to change your mind ABOUT your mind. Only by this can you learn that it IS changeless."

"Simply do this: Be still and lay aside all thoughts of what you are and what God is; all concepts you have learned about the world; all images you hold about yourself. Empty your mind of everything it thinks is either true or false or good or bad; of every thought it judges worthy and all the ideas of which it is ashamed. Hold onto nothing. Do not bring with you one thought the past has taught, nor one belief you ever learned before from anything. Forget this world, forget this course, and come with wholly empty hands unto your God."

"When peace comes at last to those who wrestle with temptation, and fight against giving in to sin; when the light comes at last into the mind given to contemplation, or when the goal is finally achieved by anyone, it ALWAYS comes with just ONE happy realization, -- "I need do nothing."