"Enlightenment is but a recognition, not a change at all." UrW188L1

Enlightenment is merely you recognizing "the facts" and recognizing that they are true. And accepting them, because they are so obvious. No more confusion or deception or lies, just reality. How are things really, what exists, what are you really?

"no-one can be angry at a fact" UrM18A4

Just the facts. What is true. What is real. What is actual.

Where are you, what are you, what exists, what doesn't. Just you recognizing it, seeing it, realising it.

There's no attack upon the ego or the world in this because they are recognised as not existing, nothing you really have to do to deal with them, and it's very simple. When they're seen for the nothingness they are they are just nothing to you.

You just acknowledge how things really are. That's all.

Everything is in its proper perspective and place. You see clearly that there is no world. That you are squarely in God, only the kingdom exists, and you are immortal.

"Others find it in experience that is not of this world, which shows them that the world does not exist because what they behold must be the truth, and yet it clearly contradicts the world." UrW132L7

It's like, you finally get a look at what you actually are without any clothes or disguises or denial. Just a good hard look at the truth of you. You know yourself as you really are.

The truth is that only God and his creation exists, of which you are a part, and nothing unreal exists. If you could just purely recognize that fact you'd be enlightened.

It's like just sort of seeing "what is". No more deception, confusion, delusion, wishful thinking, denial, trying to convince yourself of lies, trying to turn yourself into something you're not etc.

If you could go to reality right now and take a look in the light as to what is true - what's really there, you'd just see that there's God and his kingdom - your brothers, you and your creations, angels etc. ... this all exists, its what you are ... and .. .there is no spacetime. The world is recognised as totally false, unreal, untrue, nothing.

So you're done. Just looking at the simple facts. Acceptance of reality, recognition of the truth. Not some conceptual truth - factual experienced truth. What is. What is not.

Not much different than when you go somewhere to visit some people and you arrive and they're there and you're there and the place is there and that's all there is to it.

Enlightenment is just you coming home to live in God in total honesty and willingness and acceptance.

For many years I have thought that there are kind of 3 states. There is false perception, then true perception, then heaven. And this is kind of true, and some aspects of ACIM support this.

However, what there really is are just two states. Heaven and hell, reality and illusions. Life and death. Knowledge and Perception.When we think about true perception it's easy to think of it as a state in and of itself. But we need to remember we're talking about PERCEIVING. And that means it's much more to do with "looking at" something.

If you ask yourself, what does false perception LOOK AT, it really kind of looks AT itself. Because false perception IS an internalized, isolated, exclusive state, where perception feeds upon itself and is blinded by form. It does not really see anything, and it cannot see reality. It is selfish and self-deceptive. It's like an obsession with itself, a closed perception that does not see.

When you then look at what the course says about true perception, it's much more to do with NOT dwelling on itself. NOT dwelling on the body. Looking BEYOND illusion. Overlooking. Seeing past. And there is a great deal of evidence that it entails an ability to literally SEE reality. To see God, Christ, the Sonship, perfection, etc, which are IN heaven.

The more I look into it the more it makes sense. Perception is about "what you look at" or how you look at it. Yes you have states of mind - for example wrong mindendess (or closed mindedness) produces false perception. While open mindedness or miracle/right mindedness produces true perception. But from these seeming "states" or the states from which perception EMITS, perception itself LOOKS and is a form of vision. So it needs something to look AT. So let's say...

False perception LOOKS AT HELL.

True perception LOOKS AT HEAVEN.

While there seem to be two "states of mind" within dreaming, ie wrong-mindedness and right-mindedness, really when it comes to perception there is either "the inability to see reality' (per the body which cannot really see reality), and the vision of christ which can see christ. "Love looks upon love" etc.

If wrong mindedness CAUSES perceptual blindness and an inability to see PAST the illusions of falseness itself, right mindedness CAUSES vision and an ability to see PAST illusions. The only thing that is BEYOND illusions, is GODS KINGDOM.

This seems to in many cases line up with what the course says and in its wording, as to how "the real world" is a PERCEPTION OF THE KINGDOM. That the innocence can see God. That perception can even see "the real world" (heaven) under the holy spirit's guidance. That you can see the face of christ, who is in heaven. etc.

So again I come back to, false perception being like living in a prison cell inside a room with no windows. And true perception is like living in a glass greenhouse where you can see THROUGH the walls and see the outside environment (heaven). The PERCEPTION OF the real world - the perception OF heaven, using perception TO see, is still an illusion. "The real world still is but a dream"... BUT, it IS a perception ABOUT heaven - reality. And it is so close to true sight that it makes crossing over to reality easy. It's like window-shopping then going inside the store.

I don't really see anything that contradicts this model. In fact I see MORE contradictions in the model that true perception is "cut off from heaven" completely. As though, we're hiding inside a completely dark room the whole time with NO ACCESS whatsoever to reality, and only upon leaving the room AFTER true perception do we experience even a hint of God. This seems to fly in the face of so much of what the course says, about you bringing light to the world, a reflection of heaven on earth, how earth can reflect heaven's light, how the light of heaven can shine into the world, how love of God can shine into the world, etc. Heaven clearly LEAKS INTO the dream realm through its radiance. That's how you be the light of the world.

I am finding that this simpler model of "two states", heaven and hell, or reality and illusions, makes things a lot SIMPLER to deal with. We can just look to "what is true in reality" versus "illusions which are false". Or look to God's laws and the nature of the soul, versus the laws of the world and the nature of the ego. It's a much easier comparison, between opposites.

We can also then see that forgiveness really is about overlooking illusions entirely, looking BEYOND them, and there's nothing beyond them but reality. So forgiveness, ie atonement as acceptance of truth, is really about reaching out to heaven from WITHIN the dream. Sitting in the dream with goggles on, looking out beyond the walls of spacetime, to heaven... which is truly "the real world". A reality.

This also then makes more sense in terms of how the course says that God gave the real world to his son.... if the real world is a state in the middle of two other states, it would imply god created the real world to be a permanent creation, which it cannot be.

The quesiton then becomes much easier to think about. Are you aligning with God, or with ego? With life or with death? With light or darkness? With truth or lies? And as you APPRAOCH total alignment with truth you are still within the realm of perception, up until the end, when you cross over into heaven completely. This is akin to walking towards the transparent walls, then passing through the door into the reality of the kingdom beyond.

It's then not so much to do with trying to aim to enter a state of forgiveness or atonement, but that you want to become ABLE TO SEE REALITY, to see past this world to the Kingdom. This also reveals that "it its impossible to see two worlds" and "beyond this world there is a world I want" ties into wanting the Kingdom, or at least a perception of it, NOT some kind of pretend "in-between" state. An inbetween state has no meaning of its own and is logically unsupported. It means nothing other than to say it LOOKS AT one of two opposites. There is either the Kingdom or not the Kingdom, there is nothing else.

"The fear of healing arises in the end from an unwillingness to accept the unequivocal fact that healing is necessary. The fear arises because of the necessary willingness to look at what man has done to himself."

Jesus tells us ..... we do not want to ADMIT .... that we NEED healing. Because if we admit to it, it seems like it's REAL, and therefore it seems frightening.

But if you can't admit that you are in a position where you NEED healing, you also can't acknowledge that indeed healing is called for and be open to receiving it.

So then the fear of "being in need of healing" becomes a fear of healing itself.

Again this goes back to more fucking DENIAL. ie by denying that you HAVE actually done something to hurt yourself, or that something has happened that you do not want, you are AVOIDING (bypassing) the fact that it HAS occurred.

We do the same thing with this whole world. As Jesus says, the separation HAS occurred, and denying this is a very unworthy use of denial. We are NOT supposed to be denying that the separation has occurred because we are IN the state of it happening. Or at least the strong believing of it. And so it DOES seem real to us. And because of that we DO NEED atonement, we DO NEED healing, we DO NEED correction.

And that means admitting that we've fucked up somehow, and that we're going to have to actually do something about it to change our minds, heal our perceptions, undo errors, etc. There is in effect work to be done, and DENYING IT does not get the work done. Instead it results in a state of denial and spiritual bypassing "cus it never happened."

We need to stop pretending that the world isn't right in front of our faces. So long as we are in a body the world is real to us. And we're going to have to deal with it.

If we can't admit that we've put ourselves into a precarious position, we're not going to be seeing the NEED for a solution. And we DO NEED healing. Denying "the wound" is not the solution to healing the wound. It's just avoidance of admitting that it's even there, while keeping it.

Burying your head in the spiritual sandpit won't get you out of hell.

"To you the miracle CANNOT seem natural, because what you have done to hurt your minds, has made THEM so UNnatural that they do not remember what is natural to them. And when you are TOLD about it, you cannot UNDERSTAND it."

"You do NOT know, because the journey into darkness has been long and cruel, and you have gone deep into it."

The ego in you will cleverly point out just how much you are "being ego", in an attempt to compel you to want to "get rid of the ego".

Once you fall for this trick, you will be not only reinforcing the belief that you are not spiritual enough, but will also add to this unspirituality by adding force and attack and sacrifice to your life. You'll "should yourself" and guilt yourself for being guilty.

Feeling bad because you feel bad. Feeling guilty because you feel guilty. Criticizing yourself for being too critical. Attacking yourself for attacking. Demanding you be a better person for not being good enough. These are all ego traps.

The way out is to not believe what the ego is saying is true. Is it true that you are being too guilty, too unworthy, too ego? Is it true that what you are doing is not spiritual? Is it true that you are so behind in your forgiveness? Is it true that you haven't done enough of the workbook today? Is it true that you've been buying into the ego again in a big way? Is it true that you're not where you're supposed to be? Is it true that you are behaving in an ego way and must stop immediately? All ego temptations.

The ego loves to play the role of "spirit in charge" or "teacher of the course" or "spiritual police" or "enforcer of spiritual ways". The ego will always pretend to be separate from itself and to stand apart from itself, so that it can stand in judgement of itself and hand out rules and regulations against itself for how it needs to get into line and conform. It will even do this in the name of being "more spiritual", based on the assertion you are not spiritual already.

It will put on a disguise to pretend it is `not the ego` and then hand down some kind of sentence for how `the rest of the ego` needs to stop being ego. You wouldn't think of this because you're so used to the idea that what one person does to another has no effect on themselves. But the ego's entire mechanism is SELF-ATTACK, and it will happily stand over itself and destroy itself and attack itself in the name of attempting to improve itself. It tells you to get rid of the ego, with vigor, so that you will attack the ego and try to chop it out of your life... all the while enforcing the ego and keeping it.

So when it is telling you to get rid of ego... beware... its a trap, especially if it is making a big deal about just how awful the ego is and how wrong it is to have one.

We have allowed ourselves to LEARN what we think the truth is, based on how the physical world seems to function.

We think that there are causes out there which have effects on other things.

We think that the world is able to harm us, do things to us, and that events just happen to use against our will.

We've learned a great deal from the appearance of this world, and we think that this world is actually real and that, therefore, we need to learn the truth from it.

We have mis-learned. Our assumption that this world is reality has led us to take on board so many mistaken ideas, mistaken ways of functioning, mistaken ways of deciding how relationships should work, mistaken forms of idol worship and possession and loss and gain.

So many things we've taken away from our exposure to this world, thinking that it is showing us a world of truth. We think this world is actually objectively real and that how it appears is completely normal, natural, obvious and clear.

It is not.

This world is vast illusion. It is extremely deceptive. It is showing you something which is impossible. It is a depiction of an idea of being separate from God and what it would seem to be like if that were possible, even though it is not possible.

This world shows you people who are suffering, people who are sick, people who are affected, people who are victimized, and people who die. That isn't truth. There is no truth to learn from that, other than that it is not true.

So we've been hanging out in this place a lot and just taking for granted everything we see as though it is factual reality, that there is not any kind of illusion happening, that things are as they seem to be, and that we can take everything at face value.

Big mistake.

We need to therefore UNLEARN everything we have tough ourselves to be true based on what we've witnessed here, because it has been nothing but an exercise in opposition to truth.

There is a truth elsewhere, in God's reality, which is not of this world. It does not function as this world functions. The laws are not the same. The rules are different. There is no attack or sickness or victimhood or violence or death in God's world. Things are not born, only later to die. Things do not come and go. Stuff does not happen out of the blue. Events don't just happen to you. It's an entirely different 'world' from which to learn the nature of the truth.

So we have been taught extremely poorly in this world, made to believe that it contains all kinds of truth, made to digest vast volumes of information about how it "really works" and what it means and how it functions. Taught how to relate to it and what to see in it and how to use it. And yet, it is all an illusion. All of that education was a lie.

There is no world here. Hello!

It's not easy to recognize the need for forgiveness. It's not easy to realize that you're even being unforgiving. It's not easy to notice that the way you're experiencing a situation or problem is you falling for some illusion. And it's not easy to see that you even have "another way" to deal with this.

The ego has been our faithful companion for a long long time. Almost every interaction with this physical world has been according to its perceptions. It has shown us an interpretation of everything that happens, making it seem real and true, and showing us a world where everything goes wrong.

And our use of the ego to respond to this broken world, has to be to use more ego to try to fix it. To solve problems. To correct people. To wrestle with what's happening. To just assume that what APPEARS to happen is real and fixed and irreversible, even though it's not.

And then we come to a sort of middle ground where people say, well, you should just accept what is, stop resisting, stop fighting it, let stuff happen etc. Yes, it's a stepping stone.

But ultimately, that's not the end of the story. That's sort of like saying, I've made my bed now I will lie in it. Or, I invented a prison, now instead of fighting with the prison I will just stay imprisoned and try to see the good in it. Or it's okay to die.

No.

When we're accepting illusions and are still inside illusions and are still responding to the world through the ego viewpoint that things are going wrong and problems are real and people are supposed to be suffering, that's not awakening. Its a form of rationalization.

We are meant to recognize that NOTHING in this world is real or true. This world itself is an illusion. It doesn't even exist. It is not happening. Nothing has gone wrong. Nobody is REALLY doing anything that they seem to be doing. We're meant to not take ANY of it seriously. We're not meant to believe our eyes and take things as though they're factually happening. We're NOT meant to just 'accept' the world.

We're meant to completely DENY the illusion of a world. We're meant to UNDO the world. We're meant to OVERLOOK the world. We're meant to recognize that this world IS AN ILLUSION not a reality. We're meant to RECOGNIZE that only what God has created - only his design - is true and real and valid. And if that is not being expressed here, then MIRACLES are called for.

Divine health. Perfect abundance. Immediate supply. Instantaneous travel. Absolute worthiness. Eternal life. If THAT is not happening, something has gone wrong, because THAT comes from love and miracles come from love and if miracles are not happening, love is not happening, then something has gone wrong.

I have almost as much trouble figuring out how to forgive something now as I did years ago when I started the Course.

When the ego comes up with some problem, it seems to be just as confusing and just as obscuring and distracting. I still seem to have to 'start out' the forgiveness process in a state of blindness and ego allegiance and in the midst of a learning difficulty.

Each time a new lesson comes along, you can bet it's just as 'new' to me as lessons that I learned a long time ago. As the next layer of the onion pops into my awareness, it's just as confounding and unobvious and difficult to deal with as the last one was to begin with. Its a new challenge. A new deception. And when this is happening, it seems that everything I have supposedly 'learned' about ACIM is thrown out the window and I can't even remember how to do a basic forgiveness.

This can make it seem as though I have made no progress whatsoever, because each time a new lesson pops up its back to square one. I can accumulate an intellectual understanding of the Course and evolve my grasp of the metaphysics over time, but when it really comes down to 'how well can I apply it', not a lot has progressed. I know I have gotten better 'skilled' at it if you will, but each challenge is still challenging.

I guess this is because there is simply a lot of 'work' to do, a lot of correction needed and a lot of stuff to sort out. The sorting out can take a long time, and just because you already sorted out 15 boxes of junk and 3 boxes of 'keepers' doesn't mean the next box of junk is any easier to decipher. Here I am, still shoveling shit.

Its not glamorous. It's not what the ego wants or expects, preferring to 'make a constant upward climb' in really noticeable ways. It's not something the ego can master like, some course you can take where you master a module and move on. You're having to constantly reapply the same learning and find ways, in seemingly very real new situations, how to transfer your learning to this new scenario. It's always difficult. And the ego is always resisting doing it just as much if not more than before. It's an ongoing struggle.

Someday I presume the pile of shit will reach the bottom and there won't be any more shit to shovel. Till then, you gotta keep on digging your way out and finding that extra ounce of willingness and extre desire to open up to Holy Spirit and develop more trust. It does get better over time, but it never fails to amaze me how each new lesson is just as much as hassle as the last. There's a lot of layers to the ego onion.

Very often, Jesus would say to me, "it's fine". And I would be like, "how is this fine?" I would be upset about something, there'd be some physical medical issue to deal with, some seeming tragic loss, something going wrong. How can it be fine? Then my wife died and once again he was like "this is good", "it's fine". And again I was challenged to try to be open to accepting this, somehow.

I see now that the reason that "it's fine", no matter what happens, is because there is a bigger picture. There is a journey that the soul goes through across multiple lifetimes. The soul is immortal and cannot be truly hurt or lost or damaged. It certainly can never die or be sick. So that radically changes the perspective on what physical matters really mean or whether they're fine or not. Souls use bodies for a purpose, and that is all.

Everything is "fine" because nothing can really hurt who we really are, and we're just using this world as a temporary classroom to learn lessons. Sometimes we leave the classroom and then return at another time, in another body, with other people, in another place with another life. It's all fine. It's even fine if the person seems to die. How can it really be wrong or a fault or something bad if it's part of the soul's journey, even what they want, even chosen, and even part of a much bigger plan of salvation? Death doesn't mean anything good or bad, it is meaningless.

Recognizing the sheer reach of the soul on its journey through many lifetimes, its involvement in multiple serious relationships, having multiple bodies, experiencing many locations and families, many sets of parents, many lovers, many children, many conflicts, etc, it's a vast and deep and far-reaching story. Souls come and go many times with many relationships.

The much longer-term purpose is that the soul wants to reunite with God and awaken from the dream permanently, and to that end it will practically be willing to experience anything and everything if it helps toward that goal. No matter what it looks like. That puts a very different perspective on whether the things that happen, the disabilities we have, the limitations, the hardships, are really "wrong" or whether they are for a bigger purpose that we consent to. And we must remember the soul itself can never be hurt.

We only think that something is wrong when we have a special-relationship kind of viewpoint. Our ego becomes invested in this world, in bodies, in physical relations, and identifying as a human body. And then all manner of self-interest arises, attachment to other bodies, wanting to avoid death at all costs, an entire culture built around bodily living etc.

But death really is just an exit from the world as the soul carries on and continues its much, much longer path toward God. In fact death can be a liberating event for many because it represents escape from physical suffering. It is only the "dying" and being trapped in a body while it malfunctions that seems to bring suffering. As the body appears to degrade and suffer and die it seems the person does also, but in truth nothing changes the soul. Only the mind needs changing.

When Jesus tells me enthusiastically that it's "good" that a person has died, or "its fine" that someone has gone through a sickness, or "okay" that someone has had an amputation, I trust it to mean that in the really, really big picture it really is fine. Jesus was telling me it was fine when the doctors wanted to chop half her leg off. I couldn't grasp it whatsoever, but I see now it really was no big deal, as far as the soul is concerned. Who cares about bodies anyway?

Yes it seems like temporary setbacks, as the world judges it. It seems like a horrible suffering and an awful tragedy, as the world judges it. Sometimes it seems completely unfair and horrifying and terrifying, as the world judges it. All revolving around trying to keep people bodily identified and staying in this world for as long as possible. But there is a much higher purpose, a much longer-term goal, and a much deeper willingness at work. And being here for a long time isn't even that important when you're a multi-dimensional, multi-lifetime being.

I once had a dream where I seemed to go through a tremendously long obstacle course. It was fraught with difficulty and cuts and scrapes and bushes and barbed wire and mud and all kinds of upsetting scenarios. It seemed to go on forever. It was like a long and hard struggle, seemingly filled with suffering and difficulty, and by the time it was done I was pretty much exhausted and traumatized.

But then I came out into a clearing, and a guide or angel was there. And I asked, why did I have to go through all that? Because it seemed pointless and cruel and stupid. And the answer was in the form of a question - "what purpose might there be that you would be willing to go through all that, if it meant that you could achieve a goal?" And I thought for a moment and realized, that if the goal were the return to God, and if I needed lessons and challenges to get me there, then I would be willing to go through just about anything in order to attain that ultimate prize, the ultimate reunion with my creator. Even if it meant what the world would think of as horrendous suffering.

That's the perspective of the soul - a willingness to endure hardships and seeming limitations and even sickness and death if it means, potentially, the opportunity for learning, growth, for developing holy relationships, and for ultimately awakening from the whole dream. Nothing happens without a reason or a purpose. And it's all designed to carefully, and consensually, lead us toward the end game of reunion with God.

There is an atonement plan specifically designed by God to get us home efficiently and as gently as possible, but it does mean we're going to have to go through some challenges. There is an entire curriculum at work, many people that have to be encountered, many events which have to transpire. All designed carefully through the Holy Spirit to guide us home as quickly as we are willing. A hard life isn't a wasted life, it's a life used constructively for significant growth towards the final goal. Anything here can be used for the Holy Spirit's purposes.

"What could you not accept, if you but knew that everything which happens, all events, past, present and to come, are gently planned by One Whose only purpose is your good? Perhaps you have misunderstood His plan, for He would never offer pain to you. But your defenses did not let you see His loving blessing shine in every step you ever took. While you made plans for death, He led you gently to Eternal Life."

"All things are Lessons God would have me learn."

Just because you believe that you are not yet perfect, and are still trying to perfect yourself and attain some kind of 'better you', does not actually mean that you are not already perfect.

In fact, from God's vantage point, He has already finished creating you perfect. Your immortal spirit self, your true self, already exists and is already completely perfect and divine.

And in fact, God has already built into you an appropriate place for you to exist, an appropriate way for you to exist, and an appropriate way for you to express eternal life.

And that means, that you are literally already fully equipped with all of the tools that you need in order to perform miracles, in order to extend and express love, and in order to have perfect divine health.

God is not the one who is lacking and how has forgotten to give you what you need or who has denied you abilities as a miracle worker. You are the one who believes you are lacking and that you haven't been given what you have been given.

Your lack of awareness of the gift God has given you is what stands between you and your ... insight.. that you are perfectly capable and READY to express that gift to others.

You are already capable of miracles. You are already a divine physician. You just haven't realized it yet or uncovered it in yourself or developed trust in it.

God has shown up already for you. God already has your back. God already knows you. God already sees you as perfectly capable. And God has already given you an appointed 'role' as extender of the Kingdom.

You do not need to even be going back to God asking, what is my role, or please give me miracle abilities, or whatever. It's already built-in. You just aren't in touch with it and using it.

And you don't need to be going to God and saying, how do I deal with this stupid situation. God already has given His One Answer as Holy Spirit, you are already poised and pointed in the direction of being the savior of the world, you are already the light of the world, and you already share His power to command miracles of healing and correction. You just are out of touch with knowing that you are already fully prepared or how to wield the power that God has given you.

Step into the shoes that were designed for you to fill. God has already taken care of everything else.

You can see this in stores, where people are standing looking at several shelves filled with basically the same product, wondering which one to pick. And this is also me ;-)

In ego metaphysical terms, what's happening is the ego presents a vast variety of FORMS, each of which presents the ILLUSION that these forms are unique and different. They distinguish themselves as being unrelated to and distinct from each other.

So instead of, you know, going to get the one headache pill, you go and have to wade through 5 different brands each of which has like 10 variations and subtleties, which you were not expecting.

So you enter into confusion. If it's true that these objects are unique and different, then this suggests a great degree of fragmentation. And in order to understand what you're faced with, your mind is going to be in so much conflict, trying to discern or balance the subtle differences as if they are important.

The more ego problems you are given, and the more they seem to present distinctly different options, the more you get lost in trying to find MEANING. Meaning only really comes from oneness, so the more fragmentation there is, the less sense it makes.

It's like being faced with a complicated puzzle, which your mind just doesn't know how to deal with. It scrambles your brain. You are completely befuddled trying to find 'clarity' or 'confidence' or 'certainty' in the face of so many conflicting viewpoints.

So commercialism, in this way, is the ego's way to get people to believe in separate problems. And the more options and choices and 'freedom of choice' there is, the LESS certain you become.

Stores are filled with thousands of brands, millions of products, all vying for attention, trying to prove to you that they are what you want and need, when you really need God. It is a huge ego distraction.

Commercialism and ever increasing choices builds up the ILLUSION that different forms have a different value, or different content. Like, exactly how many different varieties of something does anyone really need?

I work at a company that sells a certain type of product, and there are like over 30,000 products being sold, and honestly, for most people, you would've seen all the majorly 'unique' options within about 50 products.

Take a look at Amazon, millions upon millions of products. Each time I go on there, I can browse for ages and not find anything I want. I'm not too picky ;-)

Anyway, the whole point is, is not to get you to find exactly the perfect item that you really really want....it's to get you so conditioned to think that this is what you want that you end up NOT FINDING ANYTHING. It is another part of "seek and do not find".