Some important reminders and notes about why you are here and what your true calling is. I use this as a clarifying reminder to myself when I often forget...
Being the light of the world - your true calling - your true mission and purpose - the meaning of your life - what you really want to do in life:
You have been chosen to represent God
Be in the position of having awakened, and therefore are looking down on the world from a wiser higher place, and therefore see all others need help to awaken
The great crusade which Jesus calls us to embark on, as active workers, that awakening is not complete while one soul sleeps, and that lack of love in others is intolerable.
The crusade is the atonement, which is the long-term total plan for the complete awakening of ALL souls
You have a special function to play in the atonement which only you can play, which means not only you can awaken yourself, but also that you will be specifically guided what to do and where to go etc
Choosing to represent the truth and be in truth makes you a spiritual LEADER and not a follower, and therefore your role is to lead others not follow them, unless they are truly your teacher or guide
Teachers attract the students who are ready for their teaching, to impart the greater light they have to those who temporarily have less
Jesus will send you the people that he wants you to perform miracles for and you have the capability to do so, and exercising this ability is the expression of Him
The disciples were instructed to go out and be physicians and heal the sick, as well as healing themselves
Jesus asks us to DO something to correct the error, not just learn about it
Jesus asks us not to be content until the whole world has joined us in our awakened perception
It is an invitation to everyone to wake up and return to God, this is the curriculum - learning the truth, so teachers of the curriculum (teachers of God) teach the truth and help others awaken
Teaching is by example and demonstration and doesn’t just mean ‘passively being a light’ that has no power or effect
We’ve disowned ourselves, disassociated from who we are, given away our power, and projected responsibility for everything outside of ourselves as ego. We need to take that all back and reclaim who we really are. And that means helping everyone else to do so also, because if it applies to us it has to apply to them too since we are all One
Being loving means offering love which heals and sheds light on suffering and undoes ego and restores health and awakens minds and brings God’s sons back to Him, which we are to help in the process of
It is natural to want to help others when you are aware that you are love, when you are not absorbed with your own ego mind’s control, and are therefore free and available to serve - to serve God and our brothers, rather than the ego, because then your hands are empty (come unto God with empty hands) and that means "sign me up God!", I'm available.
Miracles intervene for holiness of ourselves and our brothers and are expressions of love to our brothers meaning we need to extend that love to them and help them.
You are the light of the world. You are its salvation.
Reviewig references to "universe", it is clear that not only did God create A universe, that universe is in fact the ONE SON which is the SONSHIP IN HEAVEN. It does not comprise space or time or the contents of the material world, which is a lower-order reality. It is all beyond the body, beyond the sun and stars, beyond the earth and all galaxies. It is beyond even space and time.
Many on earth refer to the universe as the container of the galaxies. This is not accurate and is just an earth-bound scientific view. The universe per ACIM is heaven itself, beyond space and time, beyond all form, all planets, solar systems and galaxies. Even beyond spacetime itself, which is part of the belief in separation imposed UPON the universe. And the universe is nothing BUT the Son of God - the creation of heaven and it co-creations, sharing eternal life and having nothing whatsoever to do with planet Earth.
Associating "universe" with "heaven" or sonship is actually a much clearer distinction than the horrendous confusion about the term "world." The universe is heaven, in its original and unseparated condition. In the separation, we MADE space and time, in an attempt to be OUTSIDE the universe/heaven/sonship. This resulted in perception. True perception can reflect heaven's universe, but to be fully IN the universe you have to "leave" spacetime and return to your natural state in God. "To be without a body is to be in your natural state."
"the Lord of Sinlessness conceives us as His Son, a universe of Thought completing Him.""
"My Self is ruler of the universe"
"My Self, Which rules the universe, is but Your Will in perfect union with my own"
"No one but is my brother. I am blessed with oneness with the universe and God, my Father, One Creator of the Whole that is my Self, forever One with me."
"There are no beginnings and no endings in God, Whose Universe is Himself. Can you exclude yourself from the Universe, or from God, Who IS the Universe?"
"The laws of the universe do not permit contradiction. What holds for God holds for you."
"There IS no end to God and His Son, for we ARE the universe."
"every heart throughout the universe forever sings as one"
"For, unless the universe were joined in YOU, it would be APART FROM God, and to be without Him IS to be without meaning."
"The light that joins you shines throughout the universe. "
"See in him God's creation. For in him his Father waits for your acknowledgment that He created YOU as part of Him. Without you, there would be a lack in God, a Heaven incomplete, a Son without a Father. There could be no universe, and no reality."
"for there is nothing in the universe unlike itself" "Think not HE wills to bind you, Who has made you co-creator of the universe along with Him."
"He is immortal as his Father. What he is cannot be changed. He is the only thing in all the universe that MUST be One"
"Given to HIM, the universe is yours."
"The universe beyond the sun and stars, and all the thoughts of which you can conceive, belong to you."
"Your relationships are with the universe. And this universe, being of God, is far beyond the petty sum of all the separate bodies YOU perceive."
"Today's idea places you in charge of the universe, where you belong because of who you are."
"At one with God and with the universe, we go our way rejoicing, with the thought that God Himself goes everywhere with us." "The universe consists of nothing but the Son of God who calls upon his Father."
"Decide but to accept your rightful place as co-creator of the universe, and all you think you made will disappear."
"The universe within you stands with you together. And Heaven looks with love on what is joined in it, along with its Creator."
"Give him but what he has, remembering God gave Himself to BOTH of you in equal love, that both might share the universe with Him Who chose that love could never be divided and kept separate from what it IS and must forever be."
"You have the right to all the universe; to perfect peace, complete deliverance from ALL effects of sin, and to the life eternal, joyous, and complete in EVERY way, as God appointed for His holy Son."
"Forgiveness might be called a kind of happy fiction; a way in which the unknowing can bridge the gap between their perception and the truth. They cannot go directly from perception to knowledge because they do not think it is their will to do so."
So forgiveness bridges the gap between FALSE perception and KNOWLEDGE, by producing a temporary intermediate state between the two which SYMBOLIZES knowledge closely enough to make the transition to it easier.
But if you think about it, forgiveness entails you giving meaning to everything you see, just as unforgiveness does. You project in order to perceive. So in effect, you have to "decide", somewhat randomly, that you're going to just choose to love the world. And by loving it, you push love onto it, and see that love in it. Not that it's really there. Any more than when you push hatred and guilt onto it it's seen in it but it's not really there.
"Earth can reflect heaven or hell and always as you wish."
So it seems like this decision as to what you will perceive is really quite arbitrary. It's not really based on anything. It's almost like saying that you just wake up one day and decide that, for a change of pace, today you're going to love things instead of hate them. Like, the fact that you love things isn't based on what the thing is, but on what you are deciding to project.
So it's like you have to take the world, which is neutral, and just spontaneously decide you're going to love it, in spite of itself, just because you choose to do so. Not because it deserves it or is made of love or anything dependent on it. Just some internal decision that you're going to adopt a certain attitude towards yourself and everything you see.
Essentially this means that forgiveness is a kind of fiction or a lie, something that you're sort of making up as you go along. You're just choosing to be more loving, of your free will. You could just as easily choose to be hateful. Perhaps this is why Jesus also calls it a "happy fiction". Put in another way, a kind of "happy make-believe" or "a happy lie." A lie which seems to symbolize truth.
Sometimes that's what it feels like, trying to forgive stuff. It's like we're asked to just be loving just for the heck of it. Just randomly. Yesterday you were hating, today try being loving. Then tomorrow you can hate again. After all this is all about giving everything all the meaning it has. As Jesus says, the world has no meaning of its own and your mind must give it meaning.
It kind of feels to me somewhat "unfounded" to forgive anything, just on the basis that it's actually a CHOICE. It's something you have to choose to do. Just as you choose to suffer. You have to choose to be forgiving, choose to not attack, choose to not make guilty. Sort of, just for the fun of it.
Of course there's a higher purpose here in that a more forgiving attitude aligns your perception closer to God and his laws, which also brings more happiness, which you may hopefully prefer. But everyone is still free to choose what they want. I guess the moral of the story is that you are not forced to have to forgive, everyone is free to choose as they wish - always as they wish. And becoming forgiving is actually a deliberate act that you're going to have to just decide and commit to, just because you want to, or because you see it as something you prefer.
The idea of your persona is that it rejects everything you don't like, keeping only the good stuff.
If you get really good at using your persona, you will get really brutal at cutting out things which seem even remotely bad.
Eventually you'll be trying to be SO good and perfect, that there will be practically nothing left to relegate to your 'bad' category. Like you hear people saying, "nothing is ever good enough for them" - a sign of a lack of self acceptance.
And if that carries on, there will be nothing left to get rid of, you will cease to exist. Death.
So you can see, the persona, which seems all sweet and nice and special and important, glowing with a false innocence, is in fact the ego's wish to destroy you, piece by piece, by gradually stripping off more and more parts of you and relegating them to hell, in the pursuit of 'being a God'. And along the way it will complement you on how fantastic your 'good bits' are, even though your 'good bits' are soon to come under scrutiny.
The persona attacks everything that is contrary to what it wants to keep. And its eventual mission is the total removal of absolutely everything that could be conceived of as less than absolutely perfect. It thinks that by doing this, what you'll end up with is some kind of totally 'perfect self'. The perfect ego, a shining glory, the jewel in the crown.
It should be clear that the only ambition the ego really has is to get rid of you. The only purpose of the persona is to slice you up and separate you out and throw large chunks in the trash. What it keeps, it temporarily exalts like some kind of hero or savior or idol. But slowly it continues to find flaws in that idol, demanding even more vigorous 'purification' and sacrifice.
It says, well, if you give this up, and give that up, you'll be better off. It tells you you don't need all of what is, you only need the special good bits. But it doesn't tell you what happens if you take that to its ultimate goal. Keep going, and there will be nothing left of you. You'll live in a world where everything and everyone seems like your enemy, you are totally cut off and alone, depressed and frightened and weak, barely recognizing that you even exist, BUT .... drumroll... you'll have your perfect little fake self. Yay. And then you'll die alone.
So you can see... as you dabble even a little bit in being dishonest, inauthentic, not yourself, or trying to manipulate reality to get some kind of special value, special attention, special love... you're basically buying into a death trap. The temptation is you will indeed seem to get some special love, but.... it calls for a sacrifice. You've got to give up an arm and a leg for it. And then it's still not enough.
This is the promise the ego has for you. Go along with its plan for salvation, seem to achieve some kind of fake goal, or seem to find some kind of fake trophy, or seem to present yourself as some kind of ruler of the universe, and, in return, all of the rest of what you really are will be suppressed and attacked and gotten rid of.
Ultimately, the ego's perfectionism guarantees that NOTHING is acceptable. And sooner or later this will become apparent. Until you wake up and realize there has to be a better way.
You don't need a persona. You don't need an ego. You have God.
Forgiveness is a constant state of knowing there is nothing to forgive. God is "forgiving" but only in the sense that He knows there is nothing to forgive. Forgiveness is more of a sustaining of the truth, an extension of love and a clarity about what is true.
If you have a forgiving attitude it means you overlook errors because you do not make them and recognize they do not exist. You are forgiving because by looking with forgiveness you shine a kind and gentle light on all that you see, acknowledging its innocence and yours.
It's when you fail to be forgiving that you enter into making illusions, perceiving guilt, and are calling for punishment.
God's attitude is that you are always innocent. Holy Spirit's attitude is the same. Holy Spirit is always forgiving. If there is anything you think you've done wrong, it is forgivable. Forgiveness extends from unconditional love and recognizes you have not really done anything at all. That is why forgiveness is a key part of the atonement principle - there is nothing to forgive because nothing has happened.
When we do fail to be forgiving, we enter into a state of judgement in an attempt to explain why we are not forgiving. If I can judge another and condemn them, this is my attempt to explain that I did not forgive because clearly the other person is in error and this calls for me to righteously judge them.
"He who would not forgive must judge to justify his failure to forgive." - ACIM
What I need to then do is stop and recognize that I am not being forgiving, and that I need to get back to a forgiving, overlooking attitude, which recognizes innocence and acknowledges the atonement. This doesn't necessarily refer to the `process` that we seem to go through to get TO a forgiving state of mind. When we're in the forgiving state of mind - Holy Spirit - all is forgiven already. But if I'm in a state of condemnation, I need help to get my mind to stop this and to resume forgiveness.
We call it forgiveness when we undo these illusions and when we work on correction of thought and adjustment of perception. But such corrections are only there for the sake of getting mind back to a state of constant pure permanent forgiveness. Forgiveness isn't therefore something you 'do' its a way of being in love. The curriculum of returning to a forgiving attitude is just that, an illusory path of corrections of the mistakes that we're making in our forgiveness.
Some call it practice - to practice forgiveness, in order to learn what forgiveness really is. Or moreso, to unlearn what forgiveness is not. But it isn't practice that produces forgiveness - the light of truth is already established by God and it is His unconditional love that is constantly forgiving through us. We share in that. Our so called 'application' of ACIM principles is more to do with undoing the ways in which we have failed at forgiveness, removing blocks to the awareness that all is forgiven already, so that we can be restored to a constant state of pure forgiving.
Once we reach that complete awareness of forgiveness, and join with Holy Spirit fully, we will cease to make errors such as judgements and will recognize there is nothing left 'to forgive' because forgiveness is complete. And this forgiveness is a protection because it pro-actively fore-gives in order not to enter into error of judgement. So long as you stick with Holy Spirit and see as He sees, you're good to go.
All is forgiven because nothing has happened to assail the Kingdom of God and nothing ever will. This is good news.
Holy Spirit is performing perfect forgiveness all the time. He is 'forgiving' all the time. This doesn't so much mean he is constantly beavering around trying to fix stuff and undo stuff. He isn't MAKING errors, so there is nothing to un-make. He gives ahead of the need for correction, so that correction already 'is'. He is already correct, and he fore-gives (gives first) in order to be protected FROM making mistakes.
Only a failure to fore-give means you have withheld the truth and therefore have projected an error, and therefore will perceive an error seeming to be real, and it will attack you, and you will try to attack it back to make it go away.
Clearly we need to get back to the kind of way of 'perceiving' that Holy Spirit is a constant example of, so that the presence of the errors we are making will cease. What we need to 'undo' is our failure to forgive, our error-making or errors in judgement. If we're seeing something incorrectly we will see something in need of correction. So how do you get to where something incorrect is corrected? You stop seeing incorrectly.
The process of transitioning from our failure to forgive, to 'being forgiving always', is what we usually think of as our 'forgiveness process', but really it is a PROCESS of correction, which LEADS TO a forgiving attitude. Forgiveness looks back upon what has been corrected and perceives that it is forgiven, because it is perceived forgivingly. Forgiveness is a CONSTANT STATE, not a one-off event.
Although Holy Spirit is constantly 'forgiving', as in has a forgiving attitude, this forgiving attitude ENSURES there is nothing to forgive. Forgiveness is pro-active. It is a state of grace and innocence from which errors are not made or seen. Once you make errors, you make errors seem real, and you do need correction because forgiveness has failed and you've entered into a false judgement. But when no errors are being made, you are 'fore-giving' all the time.
So it seems like another paradox that the ego struggles to understand. When you are fore-giving, there is nothing to forgive BECAUSE of the forgiving attitude. But when you fail to fore-give, you CREATE stuff that needs to be forgiven. It needs forgiveness then in the sense that you need to RETURN to forgiveness in order to dispel it, which MUST mean moving PAST the error to return back to where forgiveness IS.
Thus forgiveness OVERLOOKS the error in order to recognize that it does not exist and is not continuing to be made. When you fail to overlook, you look AT, and this is what the error is - a failure to extend love by stopping it. Love that has been stopped becomes 'form', including the body. Once love overlooks the body in forgiveness, it no longer MAKES the body real (the body is an error), and thus undoes it, having no need for it.
For a mind that is used to everything proceeding backwards and in the form of ego thoughts and counter-attacks and reactions, it can be hard at first to grasp how to 'un-do' rather than 'do'. Forgiveness isn't something you do TO errors, it's something you do INSTEAD of errors, so that you can be RESTORED to a forgiving mind where the error doesn't exist.
God shares the forgiving attitude of the Holy Spirit. This doesn't as such mean that God forgives, because there is nothing to forgive and God does not condemn. Yet God IS 'forgiving' in the sense of being 'fore-giving' because if he failed to be forgiving he would enter into condemnation (of himself) and all would be lost. In this sense, God forgives you for having NOT REALLY DONE any of the things you think you did in error and mistake, because He knows that they have not happened. Your belief that they have is your failure to forgive and he does not share this mistake.
Fortunately, because God IS fore-giving, this ensures there is always a forgiving home to return to, where error/dreams/bodies/worlds do not exist, and where we are always completely loved unconditionally. Forgiveness calls for overlooking all errors all of the time with absolutely no single moment of 'dwelling on' them to ponder how they demand punishment. Forgiveness relinquishes the need for punishment of any kind, including death, because in forgiveness you are innocent, holy and error-free forever.
"Father, I come to You through Him Who is Your Son and my true Self as well. Amen."
"To be alive and not to know yourself is to believe that you are really dead. For what is life except to be yourself, and what but you can be alive instead?"
"The sudden EXPANSION of the self that takes place with your DESIRE for it, is the irresistible appeal the holy instant holds. It calls to you to be yourself, within its safe embrace."
It's really just a matter of, are you really being your true self, or are you pretending to be something you're not?
If you're pretending, you're people-pleasing. That means you're putting on a persona. The persona is a fake mask, sometimes the "face of innocence", which tries to show people what you want them to see, or what you think will manipulate them into giving you the love and attention and validation that you yearn for as a result of hating your real self.
But even though the pleasing of others might please them, and maybe elicit some of the positive responses that you think you need, it's not really you that gets validated. It's the fake mask of a self that you put over the top of you. People like your little fake self but you only hold it up because you think people will hate and judge and reject the real you.
The truth though is that you yourself are hating and judging and rejecting the real you, by putting on this false image of yourself. While you try to be what you think other people want, and what will make them want you, you simultaneously hide and bury who you actually are.
It also prevents anyone from really loving you for who you are. Which means that even if you can get people to adore your fake presentation, it's still not you that they adore. And you constantly have to bend over backwards, walk on eggshells, hide yourself, stuff your feelings and avoid being seen, just to get some scraps of external love.
Another aspect to this is that by being unwilling to look within and to let people know that you have "defiled yourself", you also become unable to recognize the limitations of others. This produces false grandiose expectations that other people will be perfect toward you, because your persona is only willing to acknowledge what appears to be "good and acceptable". By only wanting to admit to that in yourself, in denial of the darkness, you become unable to see the darkness of others.
This then leads to an inability to acknowledge that other people are unloving, will never love you due to their chosen limits, that they can't give you what you want, cannot appease or validate you, and that they don't really want you because of their own egos. This harsh seeming truth lies hidden behind attempts to only find appealing "surface" signals that look as if nothing is wrong. It's an illusion of peace and acceptable and love that blinds you and covers over the deeper truth that things are not okay in you OR in them, and that therefore they can't save you from your self attack.
Often this all starts in childhood, seemingly, when the parents are not totally unconditionally loving, coupled with the physically-induced belief that you as a baby depend on the whole world to look after you. It sets up a dependency and an expectation that you will get everything from your parents or from the world. And if the world is not forthcoming with total love and validation, you'll feel empty and lost and alone, which will then compel you to overcompensate by busting a gut to try to get some response out of it/them, but it's like sucking blood from a stone. The broken saviours can't rescue you from your self destruction.
The less you can get the love from the world the more desperate you become, trying to suck up to it, putting yourself beneath it as though you are worthless, acting like a slave, hating yourself, castrating yourself and whipping yourself, trying to diminish who you are in order to only be what you think other people want you to be. And all this is a form of bargaining, trying to create a deal in which if you will let other people use you for their own selfish needs and wants, then you might at least get a little bit of something in return. So then you become a willing doormat with low self-esteem. Punish me please, thank you.
When you are not willing to confess to being broken, exposing the darkness and allowing others to see that you are not perfect, it makes it impossible for you to recognize that other people are imperfect also. Imagining that your ego is perfect and the your persona is without flaw, you other people as artificially flawless, which ignores their limitations and sets up huge expectations for them to serve you. And then they can't, and then there's anger and disappointment.
Only when you become willing to look at the dark stuff and let the light shine on it, will that same light illuminate the darkness of others, revealing their calls for love and their limitations. And this will bring an end to the external dependency, desperation for love, and the unwillingness to be your real self. And yet, paradoxically, by confessing to your "secret sins and hidden hates", which are not true of you anyway, it shines a light on them and dispels them. This reveals the real you, which has no faults or problems or weaknesses to be solved or defended against.
All of these disguises and facades and dishonesties and ways of not being yourself have to be undone. It means being willing to be exposed. And that means being willing to let people see and be aware of the various ways that you think you're defective. Your flaws, your sicknesses, your limitations, your faults, your bad attitudes, your off-days, the fact that things are sucking right now and you don't want to keep hiding it. That also leads to a willingness to be seen to be broken in public, crying and emoting and being upset around people and letting them know that no, you're not doing okay today, you're having a shit time of it.
But this exposure begins to let the truth in, admits the truth, and sheds light on what's going on. And actually this means that you're starting to step out into the light and let God see you. It means you're stopping hiding, no longer willing to be a fake self, wanting to be true to yourself. And you'll find that in fact your real self is profoundly strong and powerful and capable of remaining centred and peaceful no matter what is happening outside, if you'll only stay true to it and not keep abandoning yourself.
The more you are willing to be seen and heard, faults and all, crappy days and all, depression and anxiety and sickness and terrible attitudes and all, the more you're letting the healing come in. It means you're dropping your defences and lowering your walls and learning to trust yourself. It takes some courage to stand up and be seen. To tell people that you're not doing well. To own up to anything that's going on with you instead of just putting on a smile and pretending life is all roses. But this ownership is exactly what you need to own your true self, your real life, and your whole mind. Your sanity and freedom depends on it.
To know yourself, to be yourself, to trust yourself, to love yourself, to let yourself exist and be seen, to find peace from not having to modify who you are constantly, having a single unconditional response of love to everything, and meeting your brothers on this firm footing of reality and truth is our ultimate goal. Because God exists in the light and if we want to go home to God we have to expose ourselves fully. And in that exposure we are completely protected and safe. It is only the darkness that haunts us. And light always dispels darkness.
"It is only in darkness and in ignorance that you perceive the frightening, and you shrink away from it to further darkness."
"The steady brilliance of this light remains, and leads you out of darkness, nor will you be able to forget the way again."
"Everyone here has entered darkness, yet no-one has entered it alone. Nor need he stay more than an instant. For he has come with Heaven's help within him, ready to lead him OUT of darkness into light at ANY time."
"Coming out of the dark. I finally see the light now. It's shining on me. I know that love can save me." - Gloria Estephan
If you're carrying around some guilt about something you did wrong, you need to let that shit go.
How long are you supposed to suffer before it's enough suffering to make up for your sin? Do you want a bit more suffering? How much do you deserve?
10 years? 50 years? The rest of your life? Are you so worthless that you don't ever deserve forgiveness? When is it enough suffering that you're done? And what is going to happen when you decide its enough?
Your offering of 'being guilty' is supposedly your GIFT to the world, in an attempt to ATONE or "make up for" the mistake you made. You think that if you walk around feeling guilty about it, that you're appropriately ashamed, and you actually agree that you're supposed to be shameful.
You think this gift of guilt is actually a helpful offering, something that is called for or wanted by everyone else. You think if you remain guilty and carry around your sob story about how awful you are, that you're making up for what you did. And if you be guilty long enough, you "pay back" the suffering that you think you caused someone else.
This is bullshit. Offering guilt to the world to make up for something you did wrong is a DOUBLE OFFENSE. You not only did something wrong, but then you followed it up with this righteous self-punishment agenda where you punish yourself, on behalf of everyone else, to try to make up for it. Like, as if you can atone through suffering. And you think this is your gift to the world but all you've done is a) committed some sin, and then b) followed it up with a prolonged period of moping around acting like a guilty asshole, as if this is helping the situation. So now the world is not only hurt by you, but it's also got to put up with your guilty portrayal of yourself which, while seeming to be self-correcting, is actually just pulling everyone down even more.
How do you compare being guilty to being loving? How is being guilty for doing some wrong BETTER for other people than REPENTING FROM THIS SIN, receiving CORRECTION WITHOUT PUNISHMENT, and then being restored to being LOVING? When you are restored to being loving - which includes loving yourself - you now are in a far better position to actually 'atone', if you will, to make up for what you did. You can now offer a true gift of love and support. You can be more present. You can be more truly helpful and more attentive and available. You can't do that if you're carrying around a big heavy weight of guilt strapped to your ankle.
IT IS BETTER FOR EVERYONE if you forgive yourself and let yourself off the fucking hook, and give yourself a frickin' break, and say hey, I made this mistake, ok... it was a mistake, but it calls only for loving, unconditionally loving compassion and correction, so that I can correct my position to one of LOVE rather than one of being heavy weight of guilt around everyone else's ankles. I need to DROP the guilt and be freed from the burden of sin and shame, otherwise what USE am I to anyone else? How can I actually give anyone anything of TRUE value - true hope, true blessing, true understanding, true love, if I'm totally captivated by my own guilt?
We have to stop believing that guilt IS love. We have to stop offering guilt to everyone as if we're blessing them with it, and especially not taking guilty actions to try to 'make up for' doing something wrong. Guilt-driven actions are further attacks! We have to stop having this stupid ego-driven "guilty conscience" which we seem to think is our judge and jury and which governs and justifies us being punished for making mistakes. Each time we listen to it, it will always say, yup, you did something wrong, you guilty fucker, you deserve to die. That's it. That's how it works. It never says well, you made this mistake, because you were wrong about yourself, because you attacked yourself, and ended up projecting it onto other people as well, but really you deserve LOVE and love is all you need. So throw the guilty conscience away. It paralyzes your entire life and it's purely an ego device!
If you're feeling guilty, you need correction and love, not punishment and hate and shame. When are you going to drop your guilt? When have you suffered enough, needlessly (ALL suffering is needless except to use it to learn that you need not suffer because you're innocence)? When will you stop listening to everyone else's bullshit ego that says, yup, you gotta suffer a really long time you guilty asshole? When will you stop your own agenda of self destruction, for which you ARRANGED events to turn sour, so that you'd have an excuse to chastise yourself? And then it's like, oh, poor me, I guess I do deserve to suffer because I did something wrong, you're right, go ahead and destroy me. Its bullshit.
You need to stop making yourself guilty for every little fucking thing you do whether it's a mistake or not. And you need to drop all of the guilt that you have accumulated which enforces your STORY about WHY you are justified in not being loved by God (which is the secret purpose of your guilt-hood to begin with), and CHOOSE AGAIN to RECLAIM YOUR INNOCENCE. It's the best thing you can do for yourself, for everyone else, even for anyone that you might've harmed in a moment of confusion. The BEST thing you can do for everyone concerned is to RETURN TO LOVE. And this is the best thing you can do even for people you might've hurt because even if THEY can't forgive you continue to project THEIR guilt and hate onto you, you MUST choose innocence for yourself otherwise you're just making the whole situation worse.
And if we're sane about this, we have to say, that we should be ENCOURAGING all of our enemies and attackers and abusers and everyone else to BECOME LOVE, to be forgiven, to be recognized as innocent and to become OUR SAVIOR. This is the only way that our brother becomes our savior and Jesus speaks on this at great length in ACIM. You brother isn't going to be your savior if you can't WANT for them to be restored to a state of perfect innocence. And you can't BE a brother to someone if you're not willing to FORGIVE YOURSELF and ALLOW YOURSELF to be innocent. It's in everyone's best interests for anyone making a mistake to be healed and loved so that they can return to equality and unconditionality, otherwise they will ONLY drag down the entire brotherhood. It is counter productive to keep enemies as enemies because it only ensures that YOU are more likely to be attacked again. You can't remove attackers by punishing them, only be healing them. Rehab!
You're useless to the world when you're guilty. Stop it. Stop playing the "poor me, I'm guilty and unworthy, you better not love me" card. The secret purpose of this card is to have an EXCUSE for why God should not love you. Your failure to forgive yourself requires you to justify it with explanations for why you SHOULD suffer. "He who would not forgive must judge, to justify his failure to forgive" - ACIM. Stop justifying why you need to be guilty, for anything. YOU DESERVE COMPLETE FORGIVENESS.
You are God's creation. You are God's child. You are INNOCENT FOREVER. Stop putting yourself down and stop using other people to put you down, and stop using your stories about your mistakes to enforce why you should be stepped all over or why God can't possibly love you. You implicitly DESERVE ALL OF THE LOVE IN THE WORLD. Period. Unconditionally. Right now. Your guilt facade isn't helping anyone, least of all you.
Nobody really cares if you're guilty or ashamed or not. If they really want you to be guilty, THEY have a problem with making themselves guilty. That's their game which they are projecting onto you. Fuck em. You need to take back your power and stop being a deliberate victim about the mistakes you made. They are just mistakes. There is not a single mistake in all of the history of the world that calls for punishment. All mistakes are a CALL FOR LOVE. God is not holding a single thing against you. You cannot sin. You haven't sinned. You will never sin. You're just having a case of mental illness and thinking that you're sane when you're confused, and making mistakes in error because you've lost touch with the truth. That's all. Nobody is to blame for this. All you need is HEALING. That's all. Mistakes call for healing and restoration and for your RETURN TO UNION AND ACCEPTANCE with everyone else.
Take your life back. Everyone else can fuck off with their judgements and shaming. You deserve to be forgiven.
Denial is not inherently bad, it can be used to defend illusions against the truth, or to defend the truth against illusions. The proper use of denial is a powerful protective device and allows you side with and accept God's truth and reality, so that you no longer believe or are deceived by the lies of the ego.
We are encouraged to use denial in its proper form to protect our minds against ego illusions, suffering, guilt and even death. Resurrection itself is the denial of death. To deny anything not of God, is to accept only what IS of God.
Here are some quotes about the positive/proper uses of denial...
"Remember that what you deny you MUST have known. And if you can accept denial, YOU CAN ACCEPT ITS UNDOING."
"For this sight proves that you have exchanged your blindness for the seeing eyes of Christ; your mind has come to lay aside denial and accept the Thought of God as its inheritance."
"Miracles are merely the translation of denial into truth."
"Remember that knowledge PRECEDES denial, and that the separation was a descent from magnitude to littleness. And so the way back is to retrace the way to magnitude."
"To deny the denial of perfection is not so difficult as the denial of truth."
"This is the PROPER use of denial. It is not used to HIDE anything, but it IS used to correct error. It brings ALL error into the light, and since error and darkness are the same, it abolishes error automatically."
"True denial is a very powerful protective device. You can and should deny any belief that error can hurt you. This kind of denial is NOT a concealment device, but a correction device. The "Right Mind" of the mentally healthy DEPENDS on it."
"Denial of error is a very powerful defense of truth. We have slowly been shifting the emphasis from the negative to the positive use of denial. Remember, we have already stated that denial is not a purely negative device; it results in positive miscreation. That is the way the mentally ill DO employ it."
"But remember a very early thought of your own, "Never underestimate the power of denial." In the service of the "Right Mind", the denial of ERROR frees the mind and re-establishes the freedom of the will."
"My use of projection, which can also be yours, is NOT based on faulty denial. But it DOES involve the very powerful use of the denial of error."
"Denial should be directed only to error, and projection should be limited to truth. You should truly give as you have truly received. The Golden Rule can work effectively only on this basis."
"The weaker use of mis-projection is shown by my recognition that it can't REALLY be that way, which became possible as soon as denial was applied against error, NOT truth."
"Denial of fear, in human terms, is a strong defense"
"The miracle is ALWAYS a DENIAL of this error, and an affirmation of the truth. Only Right-Mindedness CAN create in a way that has any real effect."
"But denial is a defense, and so it is as capable of being used positively as it is of being used destructively. Used negatively, it WILL be destructive, because it will be used for attack. But in the service of the Holy Spirit, the law becomes as beneficent as all of the laws of God."
"Would you STRENGTHEN his denial of God, and thus lose sight of YOURSELF? Or would you remind him of his wholeness, and remember your Creator WITH him?"
"The ACCEPTANCE of peace is the denial of illusion, and sickness IS an illusion."
"The resurrection is the denial of death, being the assertion of life. Thus is all the thinking of the world reversed entirely."
"Your only calling here is to devote yourself, with active willingness, to the denial of guilt in ALL its forms."
"To accept yourself as He created you CANNOT be arrogant, because it is the DENIAL of arrogance. To accept your littleness IS arrogant, because it means that you believe that YOUR evaluation of yourself is TRUER THAN GOD's."
"What is One cannot be perceived as separate, and the denial of the separation IS the reinstatement of knowledge."
"It is denial of ILLUSIONS that calls on truth. For to deny illusions is to recognize that FEAR is meaningless."
"The perception of goodness is not knowledge, but the denial of the OPPOSITE of goodness enables you to perceive a condition in which opposites do not exist. And this IS the condition of knowledge."
One of the difficult things about trusting Holy Spirit is the idea of 'showing up' empty handed and not knowing what the heck to do, and yet things still working out 'in the moment'.
Usually our minds are filled with all kinds of predictive, planning thoughts which try to know, beforehand, what needs to be known in order to do whatever it is that needs to be done, at the time. And we won't budge if we don't know what's going to happen first, because we're afraid.
When Holy Spirit asks me to write my book for example, I hesitate with thoughts like "I don't know what to write" or "what will I write about". And then Holy Spirit will keep on reminding/suggesting, "book, book, book". And I will keep on protesting mentally, "what shall I do". What He really wants me to do is to just stop the mental chatter and sit down and start writing AND THEN in the moment, in the flow, in the spontaneous present, HE IS THERE, and He helps me write.
So then it ends up being, I didn't need to know, by myself, what to do beforehand, because by `just doing it` was an invitation to Spirit to join with me in the PRESENT and support me and help me spontaneously and unrehearsed.
Going to do something when you have to put aside all notion of knowing what it is you will do, and all plans, and all sense of "I can only do this IF I know what will do"... its very exposing. It makes me feel empty-handed and blindfolded and clueless. It doesn't exactly support a concept of ego confidence. It's more like, I have to `just do it` anyway with a tremendous call to have COURAGE and FAITH and TRUST.
So when Holy Spirit is urging you to do something, I think we have to remember to trust that He WILL be there in the moment with us and He WILL be helping us and he WILL be working through us. It's like you have to take the leap first AND THEN the wings appear. You act 'as if' you will have all the support in the world and then it shows up.
This is difficult to learn, because I'm so used to ... hah... being in control. Lol, (thanks HS for that insert). So used to being in the drivers seat and relying on prior learning (the past) and thinking (lol) that I can only do anything if it's been premeditated and planned out. This is an ongoing lesson for me and probably for many people, because the ego is basically the thing that comes between surrender/letting go and being too afraid to make a move when you can't yet see the safety net - a safety net that you don't even really NEED when Holy Spirit goes with you. "If you knew Who walks beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would be impossible" - ACIM
The ego doesn't understand how to put trust/faith/spirit first and to expect support from outside of itself. It doesn't know how to let itself be abundantly supported or to be included in a bigger plan not of its own making. Holy Spirit has a plan. But it calls for us to step OUT of our own plan and our own controls - letting go of controlling all outcomes - so that we can step into the spontaneous flow of Spirit directing us and moving through us and healing through us. Which reminds me of this wonderful ACIM quote:
"I am here only to be truly helpful.
I am here to represent Him Who sent me.
I do not have to worry about what to say or what to do,
because He Who sent me will direct me.
I am content to be wherever He wishes, knowing He goes there with me.
I will be healed as I let Him teach me to heal." - ACIM
To just show up, ready, willing, available, to be directed and used by Spirit, with no prior agenda, with perfect willingness and readiness, as an agent of God, without necessarily knowing or needing to know who/what/where/why/how ... that's what I/we need to get to. To go around doing God's will, working miracles, healing people, teaching and inspiring people, being moved by Spirit and supported in 'supernatural' ways. We need to learn to trust in Spirit's support and that, if we leap first, then we will find the power to fly.