You can see this in stores, where people are standing looking at several shelves filled with basically the same product, wondering which one to pick. And this is also me ;-)

In ego metaphysical terms, what's happening is the ego presents a vast variety of FORMS, each of which presents the ILLUSION that these forms are unique and different. They distinguish themselves as being unrelated to and distinct from each other.

So instead of, you know, going to get the one headache pill, you go and have to wade through 5 different brands each of which has like 10 variations and subtleties, which you were not expecting.

So you enter into confusion. If it's true that these objects are unique and different, then this suggests a great degree of fragmentation. And in order to understand what you're faced with, your mind is going to be in so much conflict, trying to discern or balance the subtle differences as if they are important.

The more ego problems you are given, and the more they seem to present distinctly different options, the more you get lost in trying to find MEANING. Meaning only really comes from oneness, so the more fragmentation there is, the less sense it makes.

It's like being faced with a complicated puzzle, which your mind just doesn't know how to deal with. It scrambles your brain. You are completely befuddled trying to find 'clarity' or 'confidence' or 'certainty' in the face of so many conflicting viewpoints.

So commercialism, in this way, is the ego's way to get people to believe in separate problems. And the more options and choices and 'freedom of choice' there is, the LESS certain you become.

Stores are filled with thousands of brands, millions of products, all vying for attention, trying to prove to you that they are what you want and need, when you really need God. It is a huge ego distraction.

Commercialism and ever increasing choices builds up the ILLUSION that different forms have a different value, or different content. Like, exactly how many different varieties of something does anyone really need?

I work at a company that sells a certain type of product, and there are like over 30,000 products being sold, and honestly, for most people, you would've seen all the majorly 'unique' options within about 50 products.

Take a look at Amazon, millions upon millions of products. Each time I go on there, I can browse for ages and not find anything I want. I'm not too picky ;-)

Anyway, the whole point is, is not to get you to find exactly the perfect item that you really really want....it's to get you so conditioned to think that this is what you want that you end up NOT FINDING ANYTHING. It is another part of "seek and do not find".

Holy Relationships occur when a person recognizes that the other does absolutely nothing to them, nether good nor bad, neither beneficial or harmful, neither special or hurtful.

In specialness, you believe the other DOES things to you, causes you to feel a certain way, pleases you, attracts you, helps you, loves you for you, etc. But along with that they will hurt you, offend you, annoy you, attack you and reject you.

It's always a package deal, because to be at the effect of another you MUST be in the victim mindset even if those effects are something you think you want. You will select someone as special who SEEMS to give you as much of what you want as possible, and as little of what you don't want, but the illusion is that they MUST give you both if you are to be at the effect of them.

If they can do anything to you at all, if you are to "receive" from them "against your will", so that you can be changed by them and affected by them, you are a victim, regardless of whether it seems like a positive desirable effect or a negative hurtful effect.

You do not want to be at the effect of others whatsoever. To do so means you are vulnerable and attackable and dependant and in the ego thought system.

You are meant to be invulnerable, completely causal, never affected by anything, and certainly not at the effect of someone else, no matter how special they seem to be.

If you are to relate to the person in a holy way, you must be whole and complete in yourself, not trying to have them complete you or make up for your lack or do stuff for or to you that you can't do yourself.

It's okay to be with someone and to have support and encouragement and to learn lessons together, etc, which can take a lot of time. That's why you come together, to learn how to love yourself (lol). But the unraveling of that specialness will be the lesson you need to learn, and it may be upsetting at first as the specialness comes into question.

One way or another, special relatioships can turn into holy relationships by the undoing of the "relationship" based in the ego, which is really NOT a relationship. You are not communicating or relating to someone, really, unless you are whole and coming from love. There is a fiction of communication and sharing but its based on mutual hallucinations and private worlds.

Real communication and real relationship and real sharing can only ever be based on love, because only love can be shared. An absence of love is an absence of sharing and is isolation. You can have a special relationship and believe that you are so profoundly affected by another person, yet in actual fact be completely isolated from them and not really genuinely joining with them at all.

To relate from holiness you need to relate to yourself with holiness, and to God with holiness. Then you can relate to the other's holiness and join with their mind. Joined minds are real relationships. Love is the only connection. This is why the Holy Spirit, who is love, is the "highest communication medium", being completely open to share and extend love.

Going into a questioning mode, in which you ask yourself, should I do this or shouldn't I.... is actually a movement into fear.

As soon as you're in this mode of perception, there is no way you're going to settle on a peaceful decision.

You'll think that deciding one way will bring you peace, except that.. you can't get the other way out of your mind. And then you think if you decide the other way, maybe that will bring you what you want, except that, the first solution still seems to have something about it that the other doesn't.

Always in this mode of fear, it is a mode of duality, where your mind is split in two and you can't "make up" your mind - because you HAVE 'made up' a mind - an ego mind, which is now trying to rectify the fact that it has to deal with two different and unrelated options.

By perceiving differences, you are fixating on the appearance that one option has something about it that the other does not, and these differences are what MAKE the two options seem like two distinct options. And yet, as soon as you see this and try to deal with it, you cannot possibly see any kind of certainty, truth, clarity, obviousness or lack of confusion.

There is no sane way to choose between these two different paths, at least not from within a position of choosing. When you're weighing up your options, what you're really doing is trying to decide whether to accept what's missing about one of the two things, versus whats missing about the other. And the fact that they are both incomplete, can only leave you uncertain and unconvinced.

The only way out of this confusion, which masquerades as very careful decision making - on your own, in isolation - but really is a movement AWAY from decision and certainty, is to entirely STOP this whole deception of choosing between things. When you are questioning what to do, you are questioning YOURSELF, and throwing yourself into fear and confusion needlessly. "My attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability." - ACIM

There is no way you can choose between things, because that requires separation and rejection and you will never be able to experience certainty or peace while separation is operating.

The only way to peace is to entirely step back out of the 'split' between options, to back off from being in a position of trying to know, or trying to figure out. You even need to get past the illusion that a decision even needs to be made, because the sense of NEED has entirely come from the very same FEAR that you have entered into, which has CAUSED you to think that you have to decide something in the first place. "Let my recognize my problems have been solved." - ACIM

You have to RECOGNIZE that what you are trying to do is impossible, and that's why you will be confused and frustrated. You need to see this deception for what it is - not two clear-cut choices, but a device for indecision, fear, egocentric control, and trying to know everything on your own.

You can't know everything when your mind is split. So when you are in this decision-making mode of selecting between things, you are not only choosing which of two things is "better", you're also choosing which of two IDENTITIES you want to associate with. And that means you are literally putting your SELF into one of two boxes.

Once you're inside boxes, or are attempting to hide in boxes in the name of getting out of a box, you can no longer see clearly and won't be able to feel the sense of relief and peace that comes from being OUTSIDE the box.

So really there is absolutely no way that your ego (split mind) can make a decision on its own and be certain or happy with it. Either you struggle and seek for truth in only one part of existence and not another, causing you to be inherently insane, or you stop trying to decide on your own.

Decisions can still be made from a vantage point outside of this split mind, where you join with Holy Spirit and see the whole situation as one, recognizing the temptation of the illusion of deciding for yourself and ceasing to enter into it. Then Holy Spirit can share His light and freedom with you, to instill a knowing, inspiration or guidance - a peace-based decision - which you CAN trust and feel certain about.

As Jesus says in the Course, seek not to make decisions about doing something you do not want to do, because it will only make you afraid.

You need to learn to notice when you've slipped into a "I don't know if I should" mode, or a "what should I do" mode, or a "I can't decide mode", which pretends to be decision-making, because it means you've gone into the ego split mind and cannot possibly decide anything. You are AFRAID, and for no real reason.

Questions are doubts. They are not real questions. This is why the tiny mad idea was a movement AWAY from knowing and truth, towards "questioning truth", i.e. entering into fear and doubt, in an attempt to pretend that you're looking for an answer, while using that excuse as a cover-up for actually moving AWAY from the answer.

Ego questions do not lead you to truth. They lead you to more illusions, and you will never find happiness or peace of mind there.

So stop yourself if you notice you're being indecisive. No matter what your ego mind says - for or against certain options - do not listen to ANY of the arguments or cases for or against anything. They are all deceptions, because the overall deception is you believing that you NEED to decide at all.

You only think you need to decide when you've become afraid, and really then you're in a state of fear, trying to decide something in order to gain relief from fear, but every effort to do so will just make you more afraid.

Imagine all the wonderful things you will actually achieve and 'do' and feel good about and act fearlessly on, when you're moving and flowing with Holy Spirit's truth and trust and awareness, instead of trying to be "sure" about what "you" need to do with "your" life.

What you will realize eventually, as is dawning on me now, is that maybe there isn't even a decision to be made, and maybe moving into decision-making is actually just fear and undermining yourself with your ego, and you need to stop doing THAT, because that is the real problem here, not what option to choose.

I thank Jesus for this clarification today, and for reminding me when I am questioning whether I'm doing the right thing, thinking that this means I have to decide all over again what to do, I need to recognize the real problem - I've entered into fear and have attacked myself, and that's the only reason I seem to be separated from truth. To return to truth I do not NEED to make this illusory decision, I need to stop listening to my own bullshit.

I've been through a lot of crap in which I've had to deal with medical issues for my wife. She's been close to death's door a couple of times. I had to literally decide whether to continue her life or not, and she's been on life-support twice.

But what I personally went through was a confrontation with the idea of death and its inevitability, and an intense ego challenge as to whether to believe it or not. I had to decide whether to side against death and seek for life. To decide whether there was a real alternative and possibility. It wasn't about her, it was about whether I believed that death is the only option or not.

This awakened in me a reversal, a 180-degree turn, pointing away from the direction of death towards eternal life. It awakened a much greater awareness of the Holy Spirit, who has the goal of eternal life. And it made me ever more cognizant of our immortal nature as given by God.

At first it seemed my challenge was to just deal with life-threatening sickness and to go through the stress of it all. Trying to make it go away and stop it like most people would. But what later evolved was a questioning of sickness itself. Having to decide whether to believe in sickness and death or not. Everyone was buying into death and giving me messages of hopelessness and I had to decide whether to believe it.

If I were to continue believing death was inevitable and unavoidable I would have no remaining faith in life. But if I were to question whether death is the only option, it would open me up to entertaining the idea that I should refuse death and turn away from it. I would have to deny and refuse to accept the naysayers and the doubters and those who expertly believed in death's inevitability.

It wasn't really that my wife was going through life-support scenarios and having to play out all the possible "what could be the worst thing to happen" in my mind. It was more that this was actually a spiritual lesson in which I had to make a firm commitment. Was I going to seek for her resurrection or not? Did I want eternal life or not? Did I support miracles or not? Was I really going to get real and LIVE the teaching and be a miracle worker or was I just going to lay down and let death have its day?

When the Holy Spirit told me in the midsts of this drama, "resurrect her", it was immediately clear what the purpose of all this was. When I sought Jesus's counsel and he told me in no uncertain terms that I must not terminate her life, I knew I was being steered towards miracles. And I had to somehow find the strength and determination to find another way.

Instead of therefore simply "going through" another nightmarish experience, or regarding it as pointless, or seeing it as something to be avoided at all costs, what was really playing out was a spiritual lesson in which I had to decide whether to side with life or death. And by that I don't just mean normal life in a temporary body but eternal immortal life. Was I going to believe in a miraculous resurrection that flies in the fact of everything everyone is telling me, or was I going to just fall into a hole and let death happen.

Well. As it turned out I did decide to side with life, and this has since been catapulting me into far greater vigilance and clarity. I see now that instead of just going through a hellish experience that I would try to avoid, it instead became a huge turning point. I had to bring into question whether death could happen, what life would be like, and even whether she was even really sick at all. Was I going to allow her to remain sick or was I going to challenge even her on her own sickness? Was I going to insist that she not be sick?

This is where resurrection entered my mind as a real alternative and as a possibility. And this is where I made a giant leap forward. I now recognize that I must in fact NOT BELIEVE IN SICKNESS AT ALL. I have had to come to realize that even my wife's sicknesses are fake. I've had to realize that she in her mind is deceiving herself and "playing a game of death". I've had to come to recognize HER immortal self which cannot BE sick, and I've had to start siding with her immortality OVER her mortality.

This has in fact given me tremendous clarity now because, the more I dwell on immortality the more clear it becomes that anything ELSE is not true. How can a person be sick if they are immortal? How can appearances of suffering exist if they are IMPOSSIBLE in God? How can a person's signs of death be true if God created that person to live forever? I am now holding this up in my mind and comparing and reminding myself and her, that she cannot BE sick, the sickness is a lie, and SHE IS NOT SICK. I was not able to so fully commit to this or be convinced by it before this confrontation with death.

How else am I to truly be in support of life, as God defines it, than to question all sickness and death? I've even had to question it in those closest to me. I've had to decide to side with the real life in the soul within each person, on their behalf, and for them, even if they don't believe in it, and even if they are actively trying to work against it. I can be of NO HELP at all unless I can stand up for God's truth, and I can have NO HOPE at all unless there is a REAL possibility of an alternative to death. There is an increasing POWER in me now which is pushing death and sickness aside.

My whole focus is now shifting to resurrection, to life, to support, to healing, to the assertion of life, the cancelling of sickness and death, the withdrawal of power and attention from sickness, the clarifying that people are not even bodies, the utter refusal to accept that someone can even BE sick, and the clear recognition that all sickness is a lie.

Even if this entails recognizing that a loved one is lying, and even if it entails not believing my own eyes, and even if it means having to not be tempted by appearances of death because part of me believed sickness and death WERE possible, and therefore I was torn and confused. I was not clear on whether I sided with life or death and was in the muddy territory of wavering back and forth. Not firmly committed to life or its opposite.

For me now it's not merely a matter of trying to struggle through life and avoid sicknesses and try to stave off death as long as possible. I am now actively MOVING TOWARD ETERNAL LIFE. Moving in the opposite direction to the ego's goal of death. Focusing on and strengthening the idea of immortality, unchangeability, invulnerability and permanence. Attuning to the immortal soul within myself, and in others. Looking for the life and the truth and the light. Seeing miracles in light and as light.

I am now heavily flying in the face of the entire world, going against everything everyone says and believes, rejecting the "nature" of this world's nature, against the grain, being unlike the world and unlike the body, refusing to accept death and refusing to allow others to remain in self deceptive states of suffering. I am having to be UNPOPULAR in order to do this and to NOT side with the mass opinions of others. I will now assert only the life-affirming and HEALING attitude of resurrection and miracles. The strength of siding with God and with the Holy Spirit, and the utter refusal to fall into traps of temptation.

Only the immortal is real. Only the unchangeable is real. Only the invulnerable is real. Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing real can be attacked or made sick. Nothing real can die. This is the only truth. There is ONLY LIFE, there is no death. Death is the world's biggest lie and I will no longer lie to myself or to others that mortality is natural or acceptable. It is the FIRM CONVICTION that there is only life, that raises the dead, and I WILL see miracles.

"Do not allow your brother to be sick, for if he is, have YOU abandoned him to his own dream, by SHARING it with him."

Christianity makes sense. It makes logical sense. The structure of its metaphysics is consistent, albeit mistaken. But here's a secret... everyone who has an ego believes the Christian doctrine, because it's really a doctrine base on the ego's thought system and the ego made it.

For example, it depends on the idea that this world is real, that you do real things in this world, and that if you do the "wrong" real things then that's a sin.

This basis alone is enough for all of the rest of it to spring forth consistently.

For example, if this world is real and sin is real, then you will start trying to identify what is a sin and what isn't. You'll separate out "good and bad". This immediately produces the notion of good and evil. Some things are considered not sins so they are good, and other things are considered sins so they are evil.

Just the mere of act of existing in a dualistic right/wrong world where real stuff happens and some of is it not right, automatically implies that evil exists. Therefore the doctrine now becomes that you should choose only the good stuff and reject the bad stuff.

This actually isn't really just a Christian perspective. It's really the belief of the EGO, and anyone who has a persona and shadow is participating in the battle of good vs evil. If you believe that some aspects of this world are good and some are not, or that some behaviors are good and some are not, you are believing in a separation between good and evil. It means the good stuff is being spiritualized, is being made special, is given extra value, and is seen as acceptable. The bad stuff is seen as unspiritual, valueless, and unacceptable.

So it's not just Christianity that believes in this dynamic. Anyone with an ego believes in this dynamic, even members of other religions if they believe this world is real and that some of the things in it are more spiritual than others.

This goes on to imply that in order to be spiritual, you must only do the good acceptable things, you must keep your behavior in-line, and you must not "sin". If you do sinful things, you will be guilty of sin and be justified in being punished. It would then only seem "right" to punish the sin and condemn the sinner.

This leads to the idea of God, or the interpretation of God, as someone who judges whether you've been sinful or not, and how he then decides based on that whether you are worthy of heaven/love, or whether you need to be punished in hell. So automatically it creates the belief in heaven and hell as the extremes of sin vs not sin.

Anyone who believes that sins are real, Christian or otherwise, actually does believe in heaven vs hell, and good vs evil. They must, because believing in real sin automatically implies these things. Its a package deal.

So if now God is only going to approve of you if you are "good" and do not do the things which are considered sins, and if God's disapproval is going to land you in hell and punishment, it gives you a pretty good motivation to be "good". So then you focus on that, believing that the more good you become the less evil you become. Makes sense right?

This also then implies that if you DO sin, then you need some kind of special pardon if you're going to be seen as acceptable. Therefore you will need to be forgiven by God or Jesus, and if they decide not to forgive you but to condemn you, then you're on your way to hell. This produces such a huge amount of fear relating to whether you are going to be acceptable or not, whether you can be forgiven, and even the possibility of going to a "real hell" is already a nightmare.

To believe that sin is real automatically leads to believing that hell is real. If sin is evil then obviously sinning produces evil and, you know, there's a "place" where evil then seems to exist, and we call that hell. This belief in real sin produces therefore the belief in "real hell", and just believing that hell is real, alone, is enough to frighten the pants off you. It is not so much that the church itself attempts to use this idea to scare you into conformity and control, although that might've happened to some degree.

The ego doesn't need the church to accomplish this. Anyone who believes sin is real will automatically haunt themselves with this belief that a "real evil" could not only attack and threaten and tempt them, but that they themselves could therefore be vulnerable or susceptible to becoming part of that evil, and wind up in hell, suffering and being damned from love forever. Nasty business. All it takes is an ego.

Also then if God is in a position of having to judge between sinners and the innocent, that now turns God into a judger and and a conditional lover. He will only love IF you behave yourself, and if you don't, He will be the one to send you to hell. The amount of fear produced by reacting to this notion, alone, is horrifying, not to mention that it implies that God is fickle and incapable of unconditional love, and so cannot be trusted.

The idea that you might not be accepted or loved, is deeply upsetting. IF God were like this, which he would HAVE to be if sin and evil are real, you're going to be clinging to the edge of your seat until "judgement day" hoping that you've got some chance in hell of not being sent into the pit.

Again this is not just a Christian viewpoint, to be fair, it is the viewpoint that underlies EVERYONE who has an ego. Almost everyone on the planet has bought into this entire thought system as a complete package. Believe in even just one PART of it and you must automatically believe in the rest of it, because it all ties together perfectly logically and leads to all of the other implications.

If you are a A Course in Miracles student, or a Hindu, or a Buddhist or whatever, or an Atheist, if you believe the physical world is real and that it contains good and bad, YOU DO BELIEVE IN HELL, SIN, A JUDGEMENTAL GOD, SACRIFICE, THREAT OF DAMNATION, SUFFERING AND DEATH. If you think you don't, and you have an ego, you're in denial.

In order for you NOT to believe any of this thought system, or any of the parts of it, there MUST be a decision on your part not to believe at least one PART of it. For example, if you were to believe that sin is not real, this AUTOMATICALLY IMPLIES that the entire rest of the ego thought system, the entire rest of "christianity", is false.

If sin is not real, there is no good and bad or right and wrong, things appearing to happen are just illusions, God is unconditionally loving and nonjudgmental, there is no real evil, there in no hell, and you are One with God in Heaven forever. And that's all an automatic logical conclusion that is part of the package deal you get when you believe that sin is not real.

You could also say, I do not believe the world is real. That too will put a pin in the entire ego thought system based on good vs evil, and will completely undermine every part of it. If the world is not real and God did not create it then there is also no real evil and no sin or death and no hell to speak of, and nothing that seems to happen here can prove that you are sinful or guilty, therefore you are already eternally forgiven.

So it's really down to the thought system, and its logical consistency. The ego's thought system is responsible for creating Christianity, it is responsible for creating all political parties, it is responsible for creating all wars and conflicts, it is responsible for creating all belief in sin and evil and hell, it is responsible for all suffering, all sickness, and all death, regardless of what form the belief system seems to take or how it's structured or what side you're on.

What A Course in Miracles is trying to teach is that the entire ego thought system and ALL of its contents, IS NOT TRUE. And that means, since truth=reality, it is not REAL. This doesn't throw Jesus Christ out the window, in fact, because Jesus wrote ACIM and He is teaching us through it the "correction" of not only Christianity's interpretation of reality, but also the entire ego's, which includes far more. It's trying to show us the way out, the truth and the light, and the correct interpretation of what is happening here.

It's teaching us that the world is not real, sin is not real, sickness is not real, death is not real, it's all an ego illusion. God is unconditionally loving, forgiveness is universal and permanent, and only love is real.

Sometimes I want to be a healer. I want to be the one that helps or fixes or heals someone. But in this there is an authority problem. I seem to believe that I must be the 'source' of this healing, or that I must do something of myself. Even if I am perhaps involving Holy Spirit in this effort, it'll still be as though I'm trying to get Him to do what I think needs to be done.

Recently I've been in a situation where someone was sick and I could not do anything whatsoever to help it. I tried. A lot. But nothing worked. At all. This was a lesson. It showed me that I cannot do anything on my own and it also inspired me to seek out 'supernatural' and Spirit-driven possibilities. And it was important to see this, even though it was painful. Without recognizing I can't do anything by myself, I would just keep trying and not be willing to surrender.

The truth now has become clear. God is the one who wants to heal. And the healing might come through me for others. But the purpose of the healing is for others, from God to them, and really I am meant to just be a channel/conduit/facilitator. I need to get my authority-problem ego out of the way and act as a bridge.

It's not me that does the healing. It's God/Holy Spirit/Jesus. And therefore, because they are involved, I need to respectfully ask them for their input and help since, after all, maybe they don't want to heal someone or maybe it isn't an appropriate miracle. Jesus does warn that miracles should not be "under conscious control" and that we should not perform them "indiscriminately", since this may lead to ineffective sporadic outcomes or inappropriate side-effects.

I believe this now to mean that I should get my conscious-controlling ego out of the way and be working WITH God/Holy Spirit/Jesus rather than have them working for me. I do not need to be the one who decides whether healing will take place or not, I just need to show up and offer my openness to connect to God and extend His healing.

This really is just a matter of clarity, putting things in their proper perspective. And it is really a hard lesson to learn that God is the one with the Authority and I am just here to extend HIS Creation. My ego wants to be in control, or to be the hero, or the fixer/savior, but IT cannot do anything that works. Love is the motivating force behind miracles, no wishes or guilt or projected dysfunction or making sickness real and then trying to 'correct' it. It is still my function to see others as not sick and not sinful, so that I can allow God's love to bridge the gap and connect with them. This is all so different to how my ego fundamentally wants to function. It is the reversal of the authority problem, which takes a great deal of surrender.

Once you do surrender and admit that you are powerless and cannot do anything alone, then you can at least become open-minded about the possibility that God can help FOR you, that Holy Spirit can do this FOR you, and that you don't even need to be the one to fix things. Let go and let God. The future is now more exciting, healing-wise, simply because I am aligning more with God and allowing His healing to flow, rather than getting in the way or interfering. It's a tough lesson to stop fixing or meddling or correcting or believing in sickness, all of which compels me to fight with sickness instead of stepping back to forgive, recognizing that reality that there IS no sickness or death because that is not God's truth.

"3 Forgiveness through the Holy Spirit lies simply in looking beyond error from the beginning, and thus keeping it unreal for you."

Forgiveness does not react to problems you think are real and then try to fix them. Forgiveness ensures THERE ARE NO PROBLEMS TO FIX.

Simple isn't it? What forgiveness means, is that you simply are "being forgiving". That you have a forgiving attitude. An attitude in which you see correctly, you do not make illusions, you do not separate, you do not attack, you do not judge, you do not make sin real, and you simply observe clearly that nothing has happened.

This awareness of truth simply shows you the proof that there is no ego, there is nothing to really undo, there is not even really anything to forgive.

Forgiveness should NOT be an attempt to "fix" or "undo" stuff which seems to really exist. The things which seem to exist, as ego stuff, are illusions of things existing. These perceptions have ONLY come about as a result of FAILING to be forgiving.

"He who would not forgive must judge, to justify his failure to forgive."

Forgiveness is fore-giveness. It is a willingness to give love fully, at all times. That is what makes for a forgiving attitude, versus being "unforgiving" ie attacking. By constantly emitting truth and love and light, a forgiving mind simply does not MAKE errors. That means it does not MAKE ego.

It is only when we slip into being unforgiving that we MAKE the ego at all, and then it seems to show up as something that seems real, but still isn't. Through being unforgiving, we weave dreams, fiction and illusions.

It is not really then that you need to DO anything about any of the errors that you make, any of the mistakenness, or anything to do with the ego at all. The ego is not the problem. The problem is that you stopped being forgiving. Or simply, that you tried to be separate from God. That's the only problem. So returning to being with God, to being forgiving, is the solution.

Forgiveness then is not a process as such. It is a permanent attribute of the Son of God. Even after the world disappears and you're back in full awareness of God, you will still be forgiving. God is permanently forgiving. This has absolutely nothing to do with whether there is anything TO forgive as such. God does not "forgiven you because you did stuff". It's not a pardon. He forgives you forever knowing that you cannot sin. And it is the "privilege of the forgiven to forgive" meaning those who are in a state of forgiveness having accepted atonement are PERMANENTLY forgiving.

Forgiveness is not a matter of... well.. something has gone wrong, or someone sinned, and now I have to DO something to clean up the mess. That is not forgiveness. That is "forgiveness to destroy." That has made the problem real and now is fighting with the problem to try to make it go away. And who hasn't attempted to use the Course to make bad stuff go away? Or to "forgive other people for what they did"? It doesn't work because that isn't the real problem.

It's not about tackling the error itself directly. The error is an indirect side-effect of moving away from a forgiving attitude. The problem is not the error. The problem is the sense of separation from love/forgivingness. Returning TO a state of pure forgivingness ie love is the ANSWER which automatically will undo and disappear any of the errors which were manifest. And that is miraculous.

We really need to learn not to fight with illusions, but instead to drop the belief that you NEED to fight with them at all, to recognize that they are not the problem, that they are not even real and do not exist, and thereby return TO a mindset of a forgiving attitude.

A fore-giving mind gives ahead of time to ENSURE that there is no error made, that perception remains true, and therefore that ego simply is not MADE at all. There being no ego and no error, there is nothing TO forgive. But rather, forgiveness MAINTAINS a state of "having nothing to forgive".

Therefore when forgiveness is "complete", it means that all things which seemed to need to be forgiven are now forgiven, and it is really only that you are being forgiving NOW (and peramenently) that those errors appear to not be showing up any more. They are not showing up because you are not MAKING them, rather than that you really tackled "real substance" of ego stuff and manipulated it through some process to transform it.

The ego does not need to be undone, because it does not really exist in the first place. Rather, we need to simply come to RECOGNIZE that it does not exist, by stepping out of judgement (unforgivingness) and back into a forgiving attitude. A forgiving attitude looks and sees that there IS no sin, there is no ego, there is no separation, there is no reality to sickness or death, and literally nothing has happened.

Forgiveness and atonement and salvation are all words for the same thing.

So how do you "DO" forgiveness? You really don't. If you are DOING "forgiveness" (as a process) it is because you believe there is something to forgive, which means you are actually being unforgiving, and therefore your doing of forgiveness is really an attack - an attempt to make a "real problem" change. But what you DO need to, or seem to need to "do", is to become clear that there IS NOT ANYTHING TO FORGIVE, by correctly perceiving, and thus correcting perceptual errors so that you do not see stuff AS real sin.

To get to that place does appear to require a process or a transition, in which you question what it is you think needs to be forgiven, and LEARN WHY IT DOES NOT. ie, to learn to see it correctly and not in a distorted way, so that you can RECOGNIZE it for what it is, realize it was not a real attack, there has not BEEN any real effects, the causes you thought were causes are not causes, and withdraw from it all sense of belief that it even exists or has happened at all, and therefore completely circumvent the ego's insistence that there is a "real problem" to deal with.

The Holy Spirit does not fight the ego because He knows there is no ego. The Holy Spirit reminds us that what we THINK we need to forgive, does not exist, and therefore it IS forgiven.

We do not need to forgive other people, because they have NOT done what we thought they did and they are NOT being the source of OUR unforgiveness. They do not need to change at all. And we ourselves are also not in need of any real change, only recognition. We have not done what we thought we had done. It's an illusion.

We must learn to recognize it is NOT REAL and therefore what we THOUGHT we had to "deal with" or to "forgive" or "overcome" or "prevent" really isn't even there in the first place. We're not seeing correctly because we are in error, and we are in error ONLY because we are not being forgiving. We've bought into some lies. Lies are not solved by attacking the lies, they are solved by TRUTH.

You are already forgiven and you are already purely forgiving. God created you to be permanently forgiving, SO THAT there would never arise any kind of error or thing TO forgive, given that everything was already seen correctly as perfectly innocent. Everything else is "unforgiveness", judgement, attack, and so-called "ego", which does not really exist at all.

The way Jesus describes the separation from God, there's a huge laundry list of aspects to this "state" that we've entered. The whole entire ego thought system and all its contents, has been given many labels by Jesus. Labels which simultaneously apply to all of it.

He describes the separation as a "detour into fear" for example. He describes that any state where there's even a slight lack of love, as a state of sin. He describes the whole of spacetime as the idea of death, in that "without the idea of death there is no world" - an entire dream of death. He describes that any state less than wholeness will induce sickness and disease.

He also equates sickness with the denial of God. He equates sin with insanity. All forms of unforgiveness ie judgement come into it. All physical sensory states of false perception. Every conceivable form of attack and murder, war and destruction. ALL of it applies to the WHOLE system. Even though it may appear that all these things are *separate things* unrelated to each other.

That means that everything in the ego thought system is a state of fear, death, sickness, judgement, false perception, confusion, insanity, sin, murder, evil, unreality, war, conflict, suffering, denial etc.

What this then tells you about the true nature of fear, is that when you are afraid, you're not just having a small emotion of fear. You're actually "doing the whole system".

You're being entirely ego. And it's a total package deal, in which you are doing all the other aspects of the separation as well. Fear is an attack, fear is denial, fear is conflict, fear is insanity, fear is sin, fear is death, fear is sickness, fear is deception, etc.

If you also consider the split mind, given that Jesus also refers to the separation as a matter of dissociation, going into a dissociated state means one part of your mind is seemingly cut off from the other. This happens in fear. In fear you believe that you are a victim and not a victimizer, that something is happening to you against your will, and you're not the cause of it. It's a state of projection and blame. Fingers are pointed anywhere other than yourself, so that you're totally out of touch with the fact you're threatening yourself.

All special relationships are affected by fear as well. There is mistrust, inequality, and idol worship, all of which inspire a sense of fear that the other person will take away what you lack. Or even the fear that you've given them the right to do something to you. To be special is to be at war, which means to be conflicted, therefore uncertain, therefore afraid. The entire fall of man is a fall into fear - a detour into fear.

(re leaving the garden of eden, being cast out of heaven) "There is, however, considerable clarification of this concept, which must be understood before the real meaning of the "detour into fear" can be fully comprehended. "

We need to understand how and why fear is not just fear on its own, separate from guilt, or separate from death, or separate from sin. We need to RECOGNIZE that ALL the attributes of the ego ALL go together. You can't be participating in one without the other. Fear is actually death. Fear is actually sin. Fear is actually every possible aspect of the ego system rolled into one. Just as death is sin and war is murder and blame is guilt and insanity is judgement.

When you are afraid, you are not "just afraid", helpless and weak and unvinvolved, or cut off from the other ego aspects. You must also be being unloving, attacking, murderous, blameful, judgemental, hurtful, guilty, deceptive, confused, insane, sinful, etc.

Eventually we have to realize that all aspects of the ego system are ONE system, one idea, one problem, one state, calling for one solution. To not be deceived by the idea that you can be participating in only a little part of the system and not the whole thing. All illusions of the separations between these different things are not true. The entire ego, the whole separation idea, is rolled into every part of it. It is all the same.

Here's a fairly easy meditation you can try. I call it 'being quiet'. You can use it to connect with and listen to Holy Spirit or Jesus.

Consider that your thoughts are actually audible, i.e. they are making sounds. If you can hear your thoughts, you are making sounds. And everyone else can hear your thoughts too, like being in a room having a conversation. I don't mean that there is a thought and there is a separate sound, I mean the thought IS the sound. We're so used to believing that all our thoughts are private that we let them run wild and unchecked, as though they impact nobody else. For the sake of this meditation, "there are no private thoughts!" - ACIM

Then imagine that you're in some place where, for whatever reason, you have to be very very quiet and not make any sound. Maybe you pretend you're in a library or a church or something. You don't have to picture anything particularly, you just need to know you need to be quiet - your audible thoughts need to be quietened down.

The main thing is simply 'being quiet' mentally, which basically means, not creating thoughts because they would disturb the peace. Since you know your thoughts are going to make sounds that are heard, and you need to be as quiet as possible, this simply compels you to focus on being quiet.

This isn't the same as thought control. You're not trying to stop thoughts once they've happened. You're just being quiet so that you do not make thoughts in the first place. And since your focus is on 'being quiet', that's enough to stop them arising. IF thoughts start to pop up you can bet you have 'failed' to be quiet because now your mind is chattering, and everyone can hear you! Shhhhhh!

I find this is easier for me than trying to be 'still', because stillness for me is too associated with lack of physical movement or not breathing and it just makes me become tense. I also find this easier than trying to focus on my breathing or breathing in a particular way or 'thought watching' and trying not to get caught up in thoughts. That's hard. Once thoughts are created they kind of have a mind of their own, because they are like little created beings with their own little bit of consciousness going off in random directions. Not making thoughts at all bypasses that. It's much easier to be quiet when there are no thoughts to deal with, than to try to clean up a noisy thought-mess after it's been triggered.

Once you've been doing this for al little while your mind should quieten down. In fact you should be able to 'be quiet' very quickly. I find this works far more effectively than other meditations I've tried.

While you're being quiet, take the opportunity then to calmly have a conversation with Holy Spirit or Jesus. Hearing them entails 'listening' which means not broadcasting your opinions and viewpoints, or your background 'processing' of what's being said. If you want to hear their voice, you need to stop your mental yacking and become receptive.Your thoughts ARE a conversation. And as the course says, the degree you will hear their voice is the degree that you're willing to listen.

Holy Spirit and Jesus are happy to talk to you if you will listen enough. Give it a try.

A. Sometimes ACIM says things like "God has not many Sons, but only One."

B. Sometimes ACIM says things like "We are the Sons of God Himself and therefore as holy as He is"

Which is true? A? B? or Both? Why does Jesus say BOTH that God has only one son, AND then say that he has many of them? Is Jesus a nut-job? Is he insane? Why isn't he making any SENSE? How are you going to RESOLVE THIS dilemma?

Who wrote these two statements? Jesus did. Do you trust Jesus? Do you accept his words? Is he telling the truth or is he a liar? Does he KNOW what the truth is? Is it possible he might know what the truth is MORE than you do, given his total access to everything in total awareness?

Well. You have TWO options of how you can deal with HIM writing two SEEMINGLY totally opposite statements, which by the way are both true, unless Jesus is an idiot. You can choose one of the following:

1) What Jesus wrote is true, and BOTH statements are true, and I will refuse to CHANGE IT, and I will not change the meaning of it, and I will not try to fit it into a different belief system, and I will not cut any of it out, and I will not deny it, and I will not attempt to distort the meaning, and I will not try to write it off, and I will not prefer one part over the other part, and I will not assign any of it to the ego, and I will not accept that it is a contradiction, and I will not view one statement as more true than the other, EVEN IF I CAN'T SEE HOW THATS POSSIBLE, because I TRUST that JESUS KNOWS WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT. Maybe I'll have FAITH in His word, and later I'll find a way to understand HOW its possible that both statements are true, accepting the WHOLE STORY that He has presented.

OR...

2) I will deny what he wrote, he must be mad, he doesn't know what he's talking about, I will only accept PART of what he has written, because I CANNOT SEE HOW its possible for BOTH of the statements to be true, so instead of accepting Jesus's word, and since I am better than Jesus because I'm arrogant and will not accept anything unless I can understand how it makes sense, I will REFUSE TO ACCEPT that both parts are true, and will insist that only one or the other is true, because that's the only way I can make sense of it, and I refuse to CHANGE MY BELIEFS, or to find a way to MAKE IT BE OKAY that both statements are true, because I am a stubborn ass ego that can't let go of a narrow closed minded point of view, or entertain the open-minded possibility that there might just be a WAY for BOTH of the statements to be simultaneously true, EVEN IF I can't get my head around it.

Now, which would you prefer?

Trust that Jesus knows and is telling the whole truth, or only accept HALF of what he says and sweep the other half under the carpet?