The trend I see in ACIM is an unequivocal all-or-nothing "siding with God". A total commitment to his reality, truth, laws, and thought system. Being of God and not of this world.
If you imagine that this world doesn't exist at all, you live in heaven, you are identified with spirit, you are one with all brothers in Christ, you know yourself as God created you, and you have nothing that God hasn't given, then this is the natural state we are trying to return to.
But that also means, not believing a single thing about this world, having no identification with the body at all, not believing that sickness even EXISTS yet alone is happening, not believing that death is even POSSIBLE yet alone is happening, being not deceived by anything you see or anything the body senses, regarding yourself experientially as not being bound by the laws of physics whatsoever, and generally recognizing that there isn't even a world here!
It's a total complete shifting of allegiance and reality and location and identity to God's system, to such an extent that you completely forget about this world. You see yourself as under no laws but God's laws, created by His will, with our will in total alignment and agreement with his rather than having a separate will. Creating with God, extending perfect unconditional universal love to everyone equally, in relationship with everyone simultaneously.
Not to mention the ability to work miracles all the time naturally. For example, there is a guy in Europe who was called Bruno Groenig that worked a ton of miracles, and believed that not only did sickness not exist at all, but that it was also unwise to even speak of it. And because he believed ONLY in health and wholeness, he miraculously healed many people.
This is the goal that we're striving for. And we may not be able to relate to it, because right now we're probably somewhere in-between - committed to ego, sickness, suffering, fear, guilt and death. We think we are in a body in space time. We think stuff is really happening. We think we have real problems. That we can't escape and have no power.
We think the people we see as bodies have real sicknesses and that sickness and death are realities that exist. That we can suffer real loss and be deprived and unhappy. That we are still victims stuck in a prison world trying to find the way out, while being inundated with the ego's false advertising campaign.
So it seems a bit of a tall order to completely get out of all this, and I'm sure you recognize this too - a sense that there's still so much to seemingly do in order to get yourself into a state of being TOTALLY sided with God ONLY. In which ONLY God's truth is true and NOTHING else is true. In which you achieve the resurrection and ASSERT ONLY LIFE, with no trace of death or the belief in death whatsoever.
To live it and experience it, to see from it, to act based on it. Yet this is what we need to do - to completely give ourselves over to God in EVERY way, in EVERY area of life. To completely uproot our entire belief system about our life here and not for a second give this world even the slightest sense of belief or value. Only then are we ready to go home to heaven and to God.
"This is a very simple course. Perhaps you do not feel that a course which, in the end, teaches nothing more than that only reality is true is necessary. BUT DO YOU BELIEVE IT?"
"What God did not give you has no power over you, and the attraction of love for love remains irresistible."
"The world does nothing to him. He only thought it did. Nor does he do anything to the world, because he was mistaken about what it was. Herein is the release from guilt and sickness both, for they are one. Yet to accept this release, the insignificance of the body must be an acceptable idea."
"Here again is the paradox often referred to in the course. To say, "Of myself I can do nothing" is to gain all power. And yet it is but a seeming paradox. As God created you, you have all power. The image you made of yourself has none."
"Here is the perfect statement of my freedom. I am under no laws but God's. I am constantly tempted to make up other laws, and give them power over me. I suffer only because of my belief in them. They have no real effect on me at all. I am perfectly free of the effects of all laws save God's. And His are the laws of freedom."
"Loss is not loss when properly perceived. Pain is impossible. There is no grief with any cause at all and suffering of any kind is nothing but a dream. Such is the truth, at first to be but said, and then repeated many times, and next to be accepted as but partly true, with many reservations, then to be considered seriously more and more, and finally accepted as the truth."
"Miracles make time and tide wait for all men. They can heal the sick and raise the dead because man himself made both death and taxes, and can abolish both."
"The resurrection is the denial of death, being the assertion of life. Thus is all the thinking of the world reversed entirely. Life is now recognized as salvation, and pain and misery of any kind perceived as hell. Love is no longer feared but gladly welcomed. Idols have disappeared, and the remembrance of God shines unimpeded across the world. Christ's face is seen in every living thing, and nothing is held in darkness apart from the light of forgiveness. There is no sorrow still upon the earth. The joy of Heaven has come upon it."
"Thus does the miracle undo all things the world attests can never BE undone. And hopelessness and death MUST disappear before the ancient clarion call of life. This call has power FAR beyond the weak and miserable cry of death and guilt. The ancient Calling of the Father to His Son, and of the Son unto his own, will yet be the last trumpet that the world will ever hear. Brother, there is no death. And this you learn when you but wish to show your brother that you had no hurt of him. He thinks your blood is on his hands, and so he stands condemned. But it is given you to SHOW him, by your healing, that his guilt is but the fabric of a senseless dream."
Here's something that may be very difficult to own up to. If you are upset by anything in the world, it is because you have attacked the world. And usually when you are upset, it is because you perceive someone else did the attacking. And then you recoil and despise the attack, and it affects you, and you become upset. And this all covers up the fact that you are attacking. Sin seems outside of you, not in your mind.
You see, you cannot see attack unless you attack. If someone seems to murder someone in front of your face, most people would be horrified. But that's the ego being horrified, about what the ego has done. The reaction has to be fake, because if you knew the truth you'd know nothing has really happened, would laugh at it, and raise the dead. Nothing real can be threatened. There is no death. You're just seeing a dream.
What's very hard to confess to or even be aware of, is that the only reason you are upset by a murder is because there is part of your mind that believes in murder, and is murderous. It reminds you of that, and triggers that in you. You are horrified by your OWN belief about YOURSELF. It reflects what you think is going to happen to you, and what you are doing to yourself. Otherwise you would dismiss it in an instant.
You might say, well, I'm a really loving person and I absolutely would never want to hurt anyone. I advocate for love and can only love. BUT, when someone gets murdered in front of my face, I may freak out. Why? How is that possible? It's only possible because I make it real, I believe it's true, and I value it. I see what I value, and value what I believe in. So I believe in the murder, and its horrors just reflect what I believe I deserve, because of my belief in sin being real, which I am perceiving outside of me.
There HAS TO BE something in my mind that is made of sin, in order for me to react to the "sinful behavior" of others. Otherwise I would be absolutely unmoved by this illusion. So on the one hand I'm claiming to be love/loving, but these events prove my love is conditional, and that means I MUST be in denial. Invulnerability is a characteristic of innocence and holiness, not reacting with ego emotional trauma. A peace that passes all understanding. The immovable rock of sanity.
So we have to be really, REALLY honest with ourselves. Are we REALLY loving, if we are so easily shaken by sin? Are we really awake, if we are still affected by the world we see? Something is incomplete if there is even a slight trace of upset. If we have any reaction other than love, we are in the ego. To the Holy Spirit, all things call for love, not fear.
Yet sometimes we split the world into two things. There are perceived behaviors which are "okay and loving" and other behaviors "which are evil". This is the result of a split mind looking at the world. And when the loving things happen we think, ok, that's love, I'm doing that, so I'm loving. Then when the unholy things happen we think, that's NOT love. But instead of recognizing it as a meaningless illusion we recoil in horror and pass blame and point a finger and make the person wrong. Because we're not really whole in our love. It's not unconditional.
If I derive my sense of happiness from what happens "to me" or what happens "in the world", then I am easily robbed of happiness when anything goes wrong. And there are plenty of things that will go wrong. Invulnerability and love can only come about by becoming CAUSE, not effect. By recognizing that you are NOT at the effect of the world, in ANY of its forms, any events, or when anything happens. If I want to be actively loving in this world, it can't be that I ditch love at a moment's notice when something alarming seems to occur. That's special love, and too much fear. Fear does not enter where it is not welcome, and fear is its denial.
And so it's possible to have special love for the world, which means that you value bodies and the planet and want to keep it and want to have "loving behavior" and so on, but without overlooking these illusions and without being consistent. Some actions are then considered acceptable, others are considered evil and are despised. That is not love. That's judgementalism. That's fake spirituality. That's the ego trying to spiritualize an illusion and make it real. It takes many forms, sometimes things such as "not eating meat", or "hating murderers", or trying to focus solely on "the positive", or wearing "spiritual clothes".
That is denial. It is the two-facedness of the ego. The ego is especially good at taking sides and making out that one "way" is right and one way is wrong. Still continuing to be affected by the world is a certain sign of unforgiveness. Forgiveness overlooks the world which is why it causes you not to take anything seriously in it, recognizing it is not real. This can be difficult to learn because many things in the world SEEM evil or unloving. But you can't have a life where you are "loving sometimes" and call it loving. You have to learn to realize that the unloving, hateful, vengeful things are NOT THAT, and see through them to the truth.
This is a course in Cause, not effect. The world is not a cause. Believing it causes anything produces effects in you and makes you sick. To suffer with upset or horror when bad things happen is sickness. To blame the bad things for causing it is sickness. To not realize what you did to yourself to make yourself experience upset, is sickness. A Course in Miracles isn't about putting on a nice facade of persona all the time and "looking loving", and then taking off the love and going into fear or judgement when the situation changes.
Beware of illusions of love. Real, genuine, deep love is unconditional in its application, sees ALL things in this world as unreal, recognizing NOTHING can change what it is, and has NO effects from worldly events. To love is not to take sides or to judge or to hate sinners. To love is to recognize the Christ in each is the only truth and all the rest is bullshit. "For you would not react at all to figures in a dream you knew YOU were dreaming."
"The secret of salvation is but this: That YOU are doing this UNTO YOURSELF. No matter what the form of the attack, this STILL is true. Whoever takes the role of enemy and of attacker, STILL is this the truth. Whatever seems to be the cause of any pain and suffering you feel, this is STILL true. For you would not react at all to figures in a dream you knew that YOU were dreaming. Let them be as hateful and as vicious as they may, they COULD have no effect on you, unless you failed to recognize it is YOUR dream. This single lesson learned will set you free from suffering, WHATEVER form it takes."
You can either be in a state of total forgiveness, or you are in a state of judgementalism.
In forgiveness, judgement is given to the Holy Spirit who has full access to all knowledge and can judge correctly. His only judgement is that there is no sin anywhere and everyone is innocent. Or to put it another way, he repurposes judgement to judge that nothing is judged.
If you fail to be in a forgiving state, you will enter into ego, into its thought system, and into limitation. You will then attempt to judge separately from the Holy Spirit, and will do so on the basis that separation is true.
This will lead to incorrect judgements, limited judgements, condemnation and accusation of sin, projection of guilt, labelling and categorising, and a general judgey attacky harsh attitude.
This judgment always concludes falsely because it's not based on wholeness so cannot see the whole truth. It is a mistaken form of judgement, in which we think we know - or have an opinion about - everything we see. We then turn into critics who are never satisfied and nothing is acceptable to us.
We then actually use judgement as an attack and a defence. It becomes a wall of interpretation in between you and everything you see, and a way to keep things away from you.
It's then used as a way to not join, and to keep your distance from things. It has a feeling of a withdrawing and avoiding and rejecting and not wanting.
As it becomes stronger you can notice that it is in fact hate and is not loving. So you form a rift, a barrier of hate, around yourself, to keep the world and reality and other people at a distance.
Judgmentalism twists everything it sees in an effort to frame it how you would prefer it be, or how you judge it to be. You form images in your mind overlaid on top of what you see, based on these judgements, and relate to the images instead of the thing itself.
This means that you're not really welcoming reality or truth as it is, and you are not really seeing, or engaging, or joining, or really looking and registering what is there. Instead you are pulling away in disgust and hate and unwillingness, and relating to your judgements as if they are real and true.
We are doing this all the time, if we're not being forgiving, and it actually removes us from direct immediate reality. It takes us out of the present, and puts us in the past psychologically. The ego's judgements are designed to keep God away from you.
The ego in us is very critical and accusatory, bitter and angry, unloving and unkind, labelling things as wrong, judging as guilty, condemning and finding things wrong, tearing things down and separating things out, disagreeing and disapproving and offering an opinion about everything. This is judgementalism.
If you will suspend judgement and decide you are not going to judge in any way, you may notice your awareness opening up, and you look more directly at things without any sense of attacking them or having something to say about them.
As you stop judging, you become more present, and it feels like you have more direct awareness and are paying fuller attention. You see things more for how they are and not for what you were making of them, and they in fact become more interesting and beautiful.
To see without judgement is to see with the eyes of Christ, which looks upon everything while remaining still and not having all this mental activity of evaluation and analysis and labelling and so on.
This forgiving state of mind just looks without hurling something at what it's looking at. The problem we really have is that we do not recognize how much and when we are judging, and it's pretty much all the time.
We also may not recognize that there is an alternative, a way of seeing that isn't riddled with judgements, defensiveness, accusation or attack. Try just looking at something without having anything to say about it at all in your mind. Just see it quietly.
"An unforgiving thought is one which makes a judgment that it will not raise to doubt, although it is untrue. The mind is closed, and will not be released. The thought protects projection, tightening its chains, so that distortions are more veiled and more obscure; less easily accessible to doubt, and further kept from reason. What can come between a fixed projection and the aim that it has chosen as its needed goal?"
"Forgiveness, on the other hand, is still, and quietly does nothing. It offends no aspect of reality, nor seeks to twist it to appearance that it likes. It merely looks and waits and judges not. He who would not forgive must judge, for he must justify his failure to forgive. But he who would forgive himself must learn to welcome truth exactly as it is."
"The Holy Spirit does not teach your mind to be critical of other minds, because He does not want you to teach your errors and LEARN THEM YOURSELVES. He would hardly be consistent if He allowed you to STRENGTHEN what you must learn to avoid. In the mind of the THINKER, then, He IS judgmental, but only in order to unify it so IT CAN perceive WITHOUT judgment. This enables the mind to TEACH without judgment and therefore learn to BE without judgment."
"How can His Son AWAKEN from the dream? It is a dream of judgment. So must he judge NOT, and he WILL waken. For the dream will seem to last while he is PART of it. Judge not, for he who judges WILL have need of idols, which will hold the judgment off from resting on himself. Nor CAN he know the Self he has condemned. Judge not, because you make yourself a PART of evil dreams, where idols are your "true" identity, and your salvation from the judgment laid, in terror and in guilt, upon yourself. All figures in the dream are idols, made to save you FROM the dream. Yet they are PART of what they have been made to save you FROM."
Let's make it clear now, that the Holy Spirit has SUPERNATURAL POWERS.
Through the Holy Spirit, any act of healing or correction is possible on any level, including what we call the physical body level.
There are many things in ACIM which many people don't believe can be literal because it seems to be so radical and unbelievable to the ego, way outside your comfort zone, and just too 'unreal' to seem real.
But the Holy Spirit is not a metaphor. He is not just some Course lingo for some fiction aspect of an imaginary trinity that doesn't really exist in Oneness.
Also, by the way, Jesus had supernatural powers because of the Holy Spirit.
Turning water into wine, is not a metaphor. Healing the blind and sick and deaf is not a metaphor. Raising the dead is not a metaphor. Turning a stick into a snake and back is not a metaphor. The resurrection from the cross is not a metaphor. Multiplying some fish and bread to feed 5000 people is not a metaphor.
These are not just conveniently dismissed and put into a nice tidy box just to fit into our nice protected little ego frameworks of how much truth is acceptable.
ACIM says "I do not feel guilty, because the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him. I choose to let Him, by allowing Him to decide for God for me."
Now. Get this. When you surrender, a lot, with a genuine willingness to admit to the truth and to let go, this opens the door for the Holy Spirit to come in. He can then join with you, and He then also has access to your mind, your feelings, your energy, and your body, and also to various aspects of events and situations in your life.
If you think the Holy Spirit is inactive, passive, just an observer, or just a lifeless metaphor - some fictional concept that makes it easier to grasp metaphysics, think again.
The Holy Spirit is God's ANSWER to the separation. The answer to the ENTIRE separation. Not just an answer like some piece of information. He is an experiential answer, the actual correction OF the problem. He has the power to undo the entire universe. He has the power to correct all problems. He has the power to reverse all sickness and suffering and signs of disease on any level. He has the capability to perform MIRACLES.
Now, when you surrender a lot and relax and INVITE HIM IN, and are genuinely open to allowing Him to work in you, He can and WILL come into you. "Holy Spirit, come", is a very simple invitation. And if you are genuinely open to this, He will enter your mind/emotions/body and start to do healing on you. He can remove stuff for you. He can cancel out negative feelings. He can heal physical sickness. He can correct the body in any way needed. And this has nothing to do with the pros, cons, rights or wrongs or whether it is okay or not to heal the body. Fuck that. He just does it, ok? Get over yourself.
Now. Willingness plays into this, therefore, because if you are not willing to surrender your ego activities, you are not allowing Him to decide for God for you. And another way to put that is, if you are in control and won't let go, He can't help you. But if you DO let go, then He has access and can help you. And you will find as you develop a relationship with Him, that he can quite literally heal you, correct you, and restore you, not just on a level of thoughts or mind, but on all levels - mental, emotional, physical. It is ultimately irrelevant whether these levels a actually REAL or not, and we know that these things are still illusions, but nevertheless He can, does, and WILL bring about healing on any level if you are willing.
Again, this is only possible because He is NOT a metaphor. He is not just some concept to make it easy to explain the Course. He is not a principle. He is an intelligence, a power, a spiritual presence. He is an aspect of God, for Heaven's sake, having been created by God as the answer to ALL illusions. And there is nothing He cannot do to correct or change them for any reason. If there were anything He could not do to alter illusions, the Son of God would be trapped in hell forever with no way to go Home. And fortunately for us that's not the case.
Holy Spirit is here not just as a friend and comforter but as your healer, guide, mentor, and liberator. You don't have to just struggle through this on your own trying to have the proper thoughts or the right perceptions. You need to surrender and get into some serious teamwork. Let Him help you. Let Him do the work of directly correcting you... supernaturally... not just like, oh well, you know that's not the right answer, 3 points off.... try again. It's more like.... you will experience a supernatural electrical power flowing through you that literally purges you of all of the "consequences of your wrong decision". Mental, emotional, physical, it doesn't matter.
Miracles, my friends. Miracles.
I never really knew how much my 'mind' seems to think that it has an answer about everything. It can't seem to shut up. I am completely addicted to the belief that "thinking equals knowing". And it's becoming apparent that it will come up with an answer even if it has really no grounds for knowing. And it will share that answer like it's some kind of fact. I go around clucking like a chicken making all these mental noises and thinking that I'm actually speaking truth, when in fact all of the things that come out are just stories and ego-based comments. I'm some kind of babbling idiot.
All of these activities seem to make up a 'me' that I really thought was aware and speaking truth. But everything coming from my ego mind is deception and illusion. In every way possible, my mind is constantly attempting to seek for the truth outside of it, and separate from where truth is.
I realize more and more, that God is the ONLY location of truth. The ego quite literally is running around this world believing 'it' knows everything, when in fact it knows absolutely nothing. It thinks it knows what is true, but it absolutely doesn't know any truth at all because truth is GOD!
The ego is not a faculty of knowing and the ego mind is NOT CAPABLE of knowing anything. All it can do is imagine and think and believe that it can obtain and hold the truth. Yet it is not a faculty of connection to Truth (capital T). It is not a device that can even perceive what the truth really is. It is obsessed with finding partial answers in amongst an absolute minefield of fragmented possibilities, seeking deeply to have the 'intelligence' to 'solve' apparent problems by delving into them even deeper, which makes them worse, and which turns into an exasperatingly frustrating experience of loss and failure.
It relies completely on analysis of the situation. In other words, it has already made everything seem real and now goes into detail trying to explain 'why' whatever is happening is happening. And as it digs for this answer in a swampland of confusion, it always comes up empty handed. It never finds any sense of absolute certainty, although instead it comes up with what it thinks is certainty, which is really, honestly, not complete certainty. And no matter how many times I take this trip with it, even if it comes up with what the world would think of as 'the' answer, it STILL is not the answer.
There is still no sense of completion in the search, no sense of complete acceptance, no sense of finding a truth which encompasses everything so fully that there is no doubt left. It is quite literally incapable of finding such a Total Truth within the realm of partial ideas, partially perceived distorted perceptions, false ideas, cleverly imagined possibilities, carefully explained analysis or any other approach to trying to find truth IN the illusion. All the time this ego mind has been looking for truth outside of it, in everything and everywhere other than in God, believing it is actually POSSIBLE to find truth outside of itself.
All of this activity is geared towards a completely impractical waste of time, to always avoid a real solution or answer, to avoid healing, to ignore God and to shut out the correction which would undo the perception of there being a problem in the first place. The ego is absolutely not interested in truly solving any problems whatsoever, or of really succeeding at finding 'the' answer that gives a satisfying and acceptable explanation for 'what is' (i.e. it is not interested in accepting God). It is only interested in dissecting and studying them deeply, wearing a hat which says "worlds best problem solver" on it. It seeks and does not find, all of the time.
It constantly fails to find a real answer, anywhere, about anything, in spite of the fact that it fervently believes it CAN find an answer, which makes it an obsession. And since the answer can never be found, going looking for it (seeking) always comes up empty handed, frustrated, lost and confused, obsessed over why there 'should' be an answer, and simply not letting go of the total absorption with its own reliance on itself.
Absolutely every ego activity, thought, behavior and process, entirely stems from this ... insane search, which is absolutely guaranteed to fail, because the very thing that would actually conclude the search and bring an answer is the very thing which would inherently UNDO the entire ego. God is the answer and God is the only truth. God is the only place where you will experience a sense of wholeness or completion or a sense of peace at having 'found' something which actually completely SOLVES all problems. And the problem is only solved by rejoining and being one with God/Holy Spirit, which the ego has absolutely no interest in.
The ego would have to SURRENDER, which means stopping searching, stopping seeking, stopping looking for, stopping figuring out, stopping imagining outcomes, stopping trying to control the situation, stopping giving energy to fruitless pointless conceptualizing and storytelling, stopping running away from God, and stopping believing in separation in all its forms. The ego mind is only even in a state of doing things 'on its own' BECAUSE OF the separation from God which gave birth to it. The separation from God was a separation from truth, answers, facts, reality and peace of mind. For the ego to believe it can find any of these things is insanity.
It seems to want to now be in the driver's seat, in charge of running the show, playing God, depending on its own prowess and utilizing its own separate intelligence and intellect to solve aaaaaaaaaall of the problems that have arisen because of its own seeming existence. How can the ego solve its own existence when IT is the problem it's trying to solve? How can it be free of a problem when its attempt to solve it creates it? How can it pursue the truth where it is not, expecting to find it, and have any hope of doing so?
The only truth is God. The only answer is love. The only response to any situation is love. The only sane practical solution is to extend God. The only response to the world is unconditional love. The only practical and wise response to any problem is to HEAL IT NOW through the miracle. And the only way for the problems to all 'go away' is for the EGO to go away. It is our very own ego self, our intellectual mind, our reliance on our separate faculties, and our intent to never surrender to actually ASK GOD FOR THE ANSWER, that ensures we will just keep spinning our wheels in suffering.
The ego will never be the truth. It will never find the truth. It cannot know the truth. And it is not the truth. The ego is FALSE. Your ego self is false.
Your TRUE SELF is in God. The truth is in God. And who you really are is in God. The answer to every problem is in God. The end of suffering is in God. The practical application of healing and correction that truly ANSWERS all problems is in God. And God is all there is.
We are responsible for creating this world, not God.
We are responsible for creating our bodies and everything that seems to happen here.
This entire universe would not exist AT ALL if it were not for Sons of God dreaming it.
Prior to this dreaming there was no universe here. This universe only does and only is what we imagine it to be and what we've made it to be.
We are the ones who manifest and materialize sick bodies. We are the ones who cause bodies to age and die. We are the ones who have invented everything that ever happens in this world.
However.
What happens very often in this world is that we get this idea... I want to be more at peace, I want to be happier, I want to be more spiritual, I want to not care so much about wars, etc.
But where do you go? How do you "get away from" this stuff? When it still seems real to you, when you are still in unconscious denial about putting it out there in the first place, what is your ego solution?
The only solution you have is to create a PRETEND HEAVEN in the midst of hell. To back yourself into a nice cozy little corner and pretend to yourself that you are happy and at peace.
The result of this is a kind of separation which occurs, between you and the world. A separation of causality. It's almost an attempt to disown what you made. It's also a disownership of the fact that YOU are putting this stuff out there.
So if your body is sick, and you decide, well, I'm going to be at peace with this. You are not. You are going to try to pretend that you're okay with it. Maybe to some degree feel more accepting about it. But if that sickness remains, something is not right in your head.
Or like, you are heading towards death, and because you think that this is inevitable and natural and there's nothing you can do about it (yah right), you start to prepare yourself for "accepting" the idea that it's going to happen.
Essentially what you are doing is trying to talk yourself into seeing ego bullshit illusions, appearing real, as if they are heavenly and acceptable. You're trying to pretend that it's totally okay with you if you are still sick and suffering, as a kind of coping mechanism. But these coping mechanisms are ego coping mechanism which not only do not work, they do not fix anything, they simply resign to tolerating suffering and keep the inevitable plan of death waiting in the wings.
Becoming at peace with bullshit manifestations, sicknesses which demonstrate your mind is warped, and death which demonstrates you do not believe in God, is not going to ultimately set you free from hell, nor is it capable of bringing you lasting peace.
There are profound numbers of people in this world who believe that this kind of "spiritual escape" within this "real" world is actually spirituality. It's like, if you can just skew your perception in just the right way, you can see it in such a way that it seems tolerable to you. This is all to do with the ego trying to become comfortable with, accepting of, and having no intention of undoing, the demonstration of attack that it wants to keep.
So you have entire religions who practice things like meditation and such in an attempt to transcend the bullshit, to get to a place of non-duality, where they are okay with "whatever happens". This falls short of waking up from the dream. It keeps you stuck in reincarnation. And it perpetuates death.
People will also believe that their mind is separate from their body and "I am not a body I am free", therefore concluding that I'm not supposed to be a body and the body is not my self and therefore I should kind of ignore whatever the body is doing. This is crap. This is denial. You are putting the body there, in whatever condition it shows up, on purpose, and for a reason. To then put it on a shelf and pretend that you are not the one who made it, not the one who maintains its sickness, and not the one who makes it die, is denial.
This world does not keep ticking over on its own. It is not self-propelled. It does not have a will or a mind of its own. It does not cause anything on its own. And it is nothing but an effect. That means somewhere someone is dreaming this world and making shit happen. On purpose. So there is something faulty about that person's belief system.
To demonstrate sickness is an attack. To demonstrate death is an attack. To demonstrate suffering of any kind is an attack. To have attack thoughts, ego thoughts, thoughts of enemies, thoughts of victimhood, or any kind of ego emotional reactions, is an attack.
These things ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO STAY. If you are waking up from this dream, then you are supposed to stop producing these "symptoms". You are meant to demonstrate that you TRULY BELIEVE in God's good nature, to such an extent, that you will ACT based on what you believe and SHOW everyone what the truth is. This is what demonstrations of miracles are for.
There are no angry thoughts in a loving mind. There are no ego thoughts in a loving mind. There is no sickness in the mind or body of an awakened master. There is no death for those who have chosen immortality, not at the bodily level or at the spirit level. Trying to tolerate these things, accept these things, put up with these things, make these things okay, justify these things, rationalize these things, or make these things out to "not matter because I am at peace" is a delusion, and symptomatic of a mind which still believes in separation from God.
NO ONE in their right mind would demonstrate that you can be hurt, that you are broken, that you can be sick, or that you can die. It is insanity to do so. These things are not something we're meant to escape from into some kind of mental state that appears to be okay with them happening. We are meant to not only realize they are illusions and not real, but to ALSO DISAPPEAR THEM. Illusions recognized MUST disappear, and that means, if they are sticking around when we're claiming to be enlightened, there is ego lurking somewhere.
Beware that the ego has an idea of heaven on earth which is not the same thing as heaven on earth, which is really a fake illusion of heaven on earth, in which you become comfortable or are seemingly not at war with people or you aren't having bad things happen right now or your mind seems relatively peaceful. You don't need to do mental gymnastics in order to be at peace. You simply need to be natural, God-given, the way God created you. It is effortless. And all else follows. Health, happiness, abundance, miracles.
"There is no death. The son of God is free." does not mean the Son of God is okay with the body dying. It means THERE IS NO DEATH because the Son of God does not choose to cause death, and therefore DEATH IS IMPOSSIBLE.
In A Course in Miracles, Jesus speaks of the face of innocence. This is an aspect of the ego identity which tends to side with "positivity" and "being good" and "people pleasing" and trying to portray itself as innocent, harmless, even weak and frail. This face of innocence is "the innocent victim", and sides with victims. The illusion of innocence is there to cover up secret hidden desires to attack and victimize. And the innocent face is a way to pretend you are not the cause of anything that happens.
In psychological terms the face of innocence is what we also call "the persona". It's part of the split mind. It's a device we use to only accept that which appears to be acceptable, positive, good, desirable, etc. But it also acts like a knife, splitting the mind and rejecting parts that it finds not good enough. It is in fact a way that the mind attacks itself by identifying aspects which are unacceptable and dissociating from them. This places them into the "shadow" behind walls of denial (blocks to awareness). It is perfectionistic, because it always asserts that you are not perfect enough.
Jesus: "The concept of the self the world would teach is not the thing that it appears to be. For it is made to serve two purposes, but one of which the mind can recognize. The first presents the face of innocence, the aspect acted ON. It is this face that smiles and charms and even seems to love. It searches for companions, and it looks at times with pity on the suffering, and sometimes offers solace. It believes that it is good, within an evil world. This aspect can grow angry, for the world is wicked, and unable to provide the love and shelter innocence deserves. And so this face is often wet with tears, at the injustices the world accords to those who would be generous and good."
"This aspect NEVER makes the first attack. But every day a hundred little things make small assaults upon its innocence, provoking it to irritation, and at last to open insult and abuse."
He goes on to describe how this face of innocence covers up a terrible secret. That behind this "special love" there is "special hate". Underlying the face of innocence and the innocent victim, is an attack and judgement and condemnation. And in it, others stand accused of sinning against you. The face becomes a way to portray oneself as "at the effect of the world", such that if it appears to be the innocent party, then others must stand accused at the slightest provocation. It is a device for scapegoating.
"Beneath the face of innocence there is a lesson that the concept of the self was made to teach. It is a lesson in a terrible displacement, and a fear so devastating that the face which smiles above it must forever look away, lest it perceive the treachery it hides. The lesson teaches this; "I am the thing you made of me, and as you look on me you stand condemned, because of what I am." On this conception of the self the world smiles with approval, for it guarantees the pathways of the world are safely kept, and those who walk on them will not escape."
Behind the innocent face therefore, there is a hidden accusation that others are sinful, and the face is held up as a mask ready to "receive" their attack, like a trap. The face is easily offended and easily upset by the world and the acts of others, as it was designed to be. It is produced by the condemnation of oneself, the partitioning off of parts of self as "evil", hiding this from ones own awareness (in the shadow) and then projecting it onto others. Thus behind the face of innocence there is judgement and condemnation, unforgiveness and victimization of others.
"Here is the central lesson that ensures your brother is condemned eternally. For what YOU are has now become his sin. For this is no forgiveness possible. No longer does it matter what he does, for your accusing finger points to him, unwavering and deadly in its aim. It points to you as well, but this is kept still deeper in the mists below the face of innocence. And in these shrouded vaults are all his sins and yours preserved, and kept in darkness, where they cannot be perceived as errors, which the light would surely show. "
False innocence is not real innocence. It's a mask that people wear to pretend to be spiritual or holier than thou. It is not authentic and isn't your self. It's a disguise, designed to make you look like the innocent one so that you are not identified as the source of guilt. Always the ego takes steps to DENY what it does, to deny your soul, to deny even that you sinned, to deny that you are even guilty, resulting in the production of a facade which hides your own guilt from you. You will then "look" innocent but only in appearance, and no-one would suspect you are the one who is attacking.
The persona and the shadow - the accepted parts of self and the rejected parts of self, are the two halves of the split mind. You keep the rejected parts in darkness because, if they were brought into the light, you would see that the mind is one, not two. And this would heal and undo the split, removing both the persona and the shadow. And it is this the persona avoids at all costs.
"Dissociation is a distorted process of thinking, whereby two systems of belief, which CANNOT coexist, are BOTH MAINTAINED. It HAS BEEN recognized that, if they were BROUGHT TOGETHER, their joint acceptance WOULD become impossible. But, if one is kept in darkness FROM THE OTHER, their SEPARATION seems to keep them both alive, and equal in their reality. Their JOINING thus becomes the source of fear, for, if they meet, acceptance MUST be withdrawn from one of them."
"The light of guiltlessness shines guilt away because, when they are BROUGHT TOGETHER, the truth of one MUST make the falsity of its OPPOSITE perfectly clear. "
"WHAT DO YOU WANT? Light or darkness, knowledge or ignorance are yours, but not both. Opposites must be brought together, and not kept apart. For their separation is only in your mind, and they are reconciled by union, as YOU are. In union, everything that is not real MUST disappear, for truth IS union. As darkness disappears in light, so ignorance fades away when knowledge dawns."
God and the ego work in completely opposite ways, but we are so used to how the ego works that even our prayers function according to the ego's laws, we ask for ego with the ego, and receive the ego, and therefore it seems our prayer was not answered.
The ego says, there is a problem here now, and I want help to fix it. In so doing, the ego makes the problem real, turns it into an enemy, then wants to fight to remove it. This produces NO ACTION, because it is a stalemate. You can't be both holding onto something and wanting to be free of it at the same time. A split will, willing two things at once, is a divided will, which is unwillingness, and produces NO RESULTS.
So when you pray with the ego, you first have believed you've got a serious problem and now you turn to God and ask, please heal this for me. It will not work. Indeed you can beg and plead. That especially will not work. The more that you believe this problem exists, the more you are actually asking to keep it.
Regardless of your words, regardless of your motives, expressing the belief behind the words that "I have this giant problem", says to God, "I want to have this giant problem and I'm going to keep believing in it, so don't take it away." Essentially, ALL PRAYERS ARE ALWAYS ANSWERED. So when you are asking and you are praying, "please fix my big problem", you are literally actually praying, "I believe in this big problem so I value it so I want it so let me have it"
And so God GRANTS that and accepts and allows it, because He does not want to take away from you YOUR free will (which He gave all souls) to choose to want to suffer, if you want to. The fact however that all prayers are answered ALSO tells us that IF YOU ASK CORRECTLY, you CAN AND WILL be given what you ask for, so you need to be clear about what you are ACTUALLY asking. Are you asking with "my illusions are real" - ego, asking for more ego - or are you AFFIRMING and BEING AWARE OF what you ALREADY HAVE, as given by God already, as the joyful experience of manifest perfection?
So the ego's dynamic always boils down to this simple structure. You believe the problem exists now or is like a wall blocking your way to the future. You believe it is real, and seek for power to rise against it, as if to overpower it and destroy it forcefully. This is absolutely not the way God operates. It is totally opposite. God doesn't fight with imaginary problems.
God is present. God knows there are no real problems now. He knows that only His Creation/Kingdom is real and present right now, and nothing unreal exists. God knows that everything is already healed and perfect and that there never has been a problem. He does not see problems in the future, nor does He see problems that "exist now" that need to be fixed in the next moment. He does not think in terms of time. He does not make problems real to then address them. He does not even really acknowledge that there is a problem at all. God simply EXPRESSES PERFECTION at all times, establishing the presence of perfection pro-actively rather than ever having to deal with its absence.
This attitude correlates to the law of forgiveness, which is that forgiveness recognizes that there IS NO SIN and therefore all the sins are forgiven, all the consequences do not exist, and there is only perfection (innocence, health, happiness etc). Forgiveness expresses - ie extends - the present reality and truth of God only. It does not look for stuff to forgive, it does not make errors real, and it does not move into judgement. It does not attack and it does not really "do" anything, recognizing that there is nothing that need be done, because no problems exist.
Therefore, in order to receive God's "help" with healing something, you need to get totally out of the ego's way of "asking because I need it", and get into God's way of "expressing so that I have no needs". YOU need to be a conduit through which God's healing flows and expresses, as though you are sitting in Heaven WITH God and He is shining and extending love through you. This puts you at the SOURCE of the healing, not as the end recipient as such. This is because healing must be GIVEN, in order to be received, and vice versa. YOU have to become the giver of the miracle in order to receive it. YOU must PARTICIPATE in the function of providing the miracle from above, and not just sit there like a potato waiting for God to fix you passively.
It also means you need to think about "the problem" in an entirely different way. You must look at all of the ways that you are thinking about the problem with the ego - the belief that the problem is real, the belief in how it was caused outside of you, the belief in how severe it is, the belief in it being "not healed yet", the belief that healing is "in the future", the belief that you "do not want it" (a lie), the belief that you did not choose it, and the belief that it even exists. These are all FALSE ideas, which actually BLOCK God's help, even if they masquerade as attempts to attract God's help.
"I really suck bad, help me", is not a question asking for help. It's a statement asserting how much you do not accept or want love. It is not ever a matter of whether God is providing love and perfection or not. He is ALWAYS HEALING and ALWAYS EXPRESSING PERFECTION. It is YOU who are not being willing to truly receive and acknowledge it, and that is the only problem standing in the way of complete healing. You threw heaven away, now you must reclaim it.
So how you work with God, goes more like this.. and this can seem "backwards" to the ego so there's a bit of a knack to it. You need to collapse and let go of every single belief that suggests you have a problem at all. All of these beliefs are attempts to keep it, and God will not take it from you while you value it. God honors your freedom. So you have to be WILLING to GENUINELY let go of all of this story and drama you've INVENTED about why this thing exists, why it is still present, and why it has a power preventing it from being let go. Wipe the slate clean of the entire story about what is causing this thing to be present.
Then you need to get to where you recognize and affirm and accept that this thing DOES NOT EXIST. It is NOT happening, there is NOT a sickness, there is NOT suffering, there is NO REALITY to this problem, it is NOT real, it has NO truth in it, it has NO power, etc. This is TRUTH! It is truth because, in truth, ONLY God's Kingdom exists, only what is real (perfection, happiness, health) exists here now, and all other things are LIES - illusions which are not true. There is NO SUCH THING as "real sickness" or "real guilt" or "real sin" or "real death." If you want the thing to go away, you need to RECOGNIZE THAT IT IS ALREADY GONE and was never really there to begin with. To really believe that and thus perceive it.
Then, you are getting yourself out of the bullshit victim story and into a position of power, a position of responsibility, a position of willingness, a position of acceptance of truth, and an openness to RECEIVING.
This is the key part. You need to acknowledge and be greateful for GOD HAVING ALREADY GIVEN what you thought you needed or lacked. So that in essence, you do NOT lack it OR NEED IT any more, because God HAS already provided. That means, acknowledging that God has ALREADY GIVEN the healing for this thing, and that IT IS ALREADY HEALED. This confirmation that it is healed already, means that the healing must've already been GIVEN, the healing must have already been RECEIVED, and therefore almost as though the healing was "in the past", not in the future. ie, you are NOW experiencing God's perfection in your life with no trace of problems whatsoever.
The ego puts all healing into the future, keeping it hidden behind a gap or brick wall which separates you from it. God places all healing in the past, because God's creation was ALREADY PERFECT before time began. You need to acknowledge the pre-existing already-established perfection of God's creation, and ITS PRESENCE NOW. So you focus not on... I have a problem now and its not fixed yet. You focus on, the situation NOW (here and now present) is that HEALING HAS ARRIVED and HEALTH IS PRESENT and CORRECTNESS IS HERE and EVERYTHING IS ALREADY PERFECT.
This acknowledgement of perfection does NOT mean the way that the ego would use it, which is to say, well, stuff is still broken and unhealed and I'm still going to die but "I'm at peace with it". Bullshit. That's the ego trying to justify death by making it out to be acceptable. It is not acceptable. Instead, acknowledge WITH THANKS, that God HAS GIVEN a miracle, and YOU HAVE RECEIVED IT ALREADY. It is here now! You are already enjoying the absence of problems. You are focused on what God has given and what you have extended from God, rather than what seemed to lack, because the only problem you need correct is the sense that God is absent or that He failed to give perfection.
By focusing on being grateful to God for you having ALREADY BEEN HEALED, and health being your PRESENT condition, you automatically open up the gateway to RECEIVE a flood of healing power from God. This is how you "unlock" access to Heaven's help, by aligning with it and putting yourself in its shoes and expressing how IT would express, believing what IT would believe, perceiving how IT would perceive, and acknowledging what is real in the way that IT would acknowledge it right now.
By saying, thank you God for having already healed this, and actually BELIEVING IT, accepting it as true, and thus EXPERIENCING IT, you are not only inviting God's presence (which will heal and manifest Heaven in you) but you are also saying "I HAVE received from you God", which... if for any reason you have not seemingly "yet" received, will now trigger a grand receiving.
It seems almost backwards, because you have to acknowledge receipt seemingly "before" it seems to have been given. You assert that you have NOW what you seem "not to have" so that it comes to you! You be grateful for what you WANT, as if you HAVE IT, so that it comes to you!
There is a line in the bible which says this: "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."
The believing in the receipt of it is VITAL and key. If you do not believe you HAVE IT NOW, it WILL NOT COME. In other words, you need to focus on expressing belief NOW in what it is that you want your "condition" to be, instead of even giving ANY attention to "what you do not want" or what you seem to have that you want to change. Get all of your attention off of trying to deal with what seems to be manifest now that you don't prefer, and put all of your attention on what you are RECEIVING FROM GOD, acknowledging its receipt, IN ORDER TO welcome it into the present and receive it HERE AND NOW.
This is totally backwards from how you would pray with the ego. It is totally the opposite of how the ego asks for things. It puts the receiving ahead of the giving, so that the giving flows, rather than focusing on lack first and then asking for it to be filled. This is how God functions.
You cannot be in a pity party feeling sorry for yourself about how much of a victim you are and expect God to bail you out. By doing that you are putting yourself into the role of NOT receiving, by focusing on God's absence, creating a distance between where you are at now and what you think you want in the future. This is no different than avoiding the Holy Instant. This is also what the Course means when it says "miracles are by believers, for believers", because YOU have do YOUR PART of the work to believe in what God is wanting to share with you, in order to receive it, otherwise your disbelief will reject the miracles.
If you want God's help - remembering also the Biblical teaching that "God helps those who help themselves" - you MUST be willing to fulfill the ROLE and FUNCTION of forgiveness and being the light of the world and acknowledging and receiving God's pre-existing abundance and perfection. You can't be saying, "I can't fix this" and then asking God to do the work "for you". You need to LINE UP with the way God functions and thinks, get yourself into the HELPING mode of GIVING, acknowledge receipt and welcome love, so that you are PART OF THE ATONEMENT.
You don't just go to God and pray and say, "hey, my life sucks, fix it". You have to stop believing your life sucks otherwise God can't help. And once you stop believing your life sucks, it would SEEM then that you do not NEED God's help because your life doesn't seem to suck any more, right? Which seems pointless. But it's not. It is the prerequisite for you RECEIVING God's help to clean up the mess of your previously sucky life, by ALLOWING Him to help.
"He will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision IF I WILL LET HIM." If you are not truly willing to allow and receive that help, you are blocking Him, and He will honor your free will. Holy Spirit CAN HEAL ANYTHING if you allow it, but you MUST be willing. You can't be in a victimy state of unwillingness, resistance, fear and making problems real, if you want help. You need to show some willingness to go TOWARD GOD, to melt the separation, to undo the ego beliefs and to put yourself back into your proper FUNCTION as outward extender of love, IN ORDER that you can HAVE what you are GIVING. "To have all, give all to all."
God's healing has to be shared, it has to be received in order to be given, and it has to be given in order to be received. It is not something you can get in isolation just for yourself, it entails a willingness that you accept it is TRUE FOR EVERYONE. If you deserve it, so does everyone, because you no longer believe in undeservedness. It's almost like "be the change you want to see in the world." Be the healing that you want to receive from God. "I will heal as I let Him teach me to heal" literally says this... if I become willing to be PART OF the healing flow, then I will receive healing myself as well as become able to extend it.
So focus on God having already given full perfection and healing NOW and since forever, recognize its PRESENCE, get your attention totally off the illusion of a "real problem", and find gratitude which opens you to RECEIVE and manifest Heaven on Earth. It is here now! Do you want to focus on your problem and be right about it being real, or do you want to be happy? God already gave perfection in Eternity and in Heaven, and we already resisted it and threw it away with illusions of problems to come between us. Get rid of these illusions and acknowledge and demonstrate the presence of the Kingdom here and now!
An interesting insight I had is that what we see as causing us, we literally take to mean it is causing us to exist. If we are the effect of it, we are whatever it decides we are.
When we are caused by God, we are forever an effect of God. Whatever God wills us to be we are that. God has total authority and privilege in this and we have absolutely no say in it.
Fortunately God's idea of us and what he wants us to be is very loving and beautiful, and so we are created and "forced to be" perfect happy immortal beings forever.
But if you switch your idea of what causes you to anything else, anything of the world, the body, the ego, thoughts, emotions, beliefs, a similar thing happens. Your SELF is once again defined by it.
So let's say the world does something to "you", someone attacks your body or something, you might see it as not changing YOU but maybe changing your body or causing upsetting feelings. But you assume that YOU are still you.
However, this can't be true, because if you perceive that these external things are CAUSING you at all, you MUST believe you are their effect. YOU, your self, your identity, is the effect of them. And they have the power to change you, alter you, upset you, affect you, modify you according to their will.
This is part of how the mind shifts its IDENTITY from being identified with spirit/Christ to identifying with other things like the the ego or body. When we try to become one with these things, or we give them power, or we see ourselves as caused BY them, our very sense of SELF actually changes.
You begin to see yourself kind of like through the eyes of this other thing, the thing you gave power to. However it's treating you, whatever it's doing to you, is redefining you. You now become the effect of it and your whole sense of identity repositions as a victim and a sufferer and that which is attacked and weakened.
When we look for things to forgive, we might say that a person did this or that to us, or something in the world is upsetting us. But it's not just that it does something to upset us, it does something to CHANGE us, and that literally changes our sense of who we are.
When you believe the world, which is your dream, is dreaming you, and it has power to affect you or change what you are, your sense of self shifts from an immortal being to a temporary mortal suffering entity. The mind shifts its view of itself as though it's now being caused BY the world, and loses track of the soul. As if what causes you CREATES you.
Who you see yourself as, the role you play, how you are positioned, who you are in the drama or story, all becomes defined BY the causes you perceive to be having an effect on you. This can happen even with emotions and thoughts where you start developing a sort of sense of being a suffering person who the emotions or thoughts are happening to.
To wake up from this we have to become clear that we're not only not affected by anything in the whole world, but that nothing in the world has any power to CHANGE us in any way. Otherwise it has the power to change our SELF, and convert our identity into something we're not. Even a slight upset emotion is a change in identity, a twinge of unhappiness, a minor fear, it's all going to change your view of what is true of you.
So we have to learn to stop making ourselves CAUSED BY anything other than God. Nothing in the world does ANYTHING to us. We are UNCHANGEABLE, and nothing anywhere can change us except for God - who has no intention of ever changing his mind about us. We have to let ourselves be only what he wants us to be, and accept the truth of ourselves, in order to recognize WHO we really are.
"You who perceive yourself as weak and frail, with futile hopes and devastated dreams, born but to die, to weep and suffer pain, hear this: All power is given you in earth and Heaven. There is nothing that you cannot do. You play the game of death, of being helpless, pitifully tied to dissolution in a world which shows no mercy to you." W191L9
"The world does nothing to him. He only thought it did. Nor does he do anything to the world, because he was mistaken about what it was. Herein is the release from guilt and sickness both, for they are one. Yet to accept this release, the insignificance of the body must be an acceptable idea." M6C3
"It is your thoughts alone that cause you pain. Nothing external to your mind can hurt or injure you in any way. There is no cause beyond yourself that can reach down and bring oppression. No one but yourself affects you. There is nothing in the world which has the power to make you ill or sad, or weak or frail. But it is you who have the power to dominate all things you see by merely recognizing what you are." URW190L5
"My Self is ruler of the universe. ... It is impossible that anything should come to me unbidden by myself. Even in this world, it is I who rule my destiny. What happens is what I desire. What does not occur is what I do not want to happen. This must I accept." UrW253
You have everything. God shared it with you.
But then the ego comes along and says, "you don't have that". It tells you, "you're lacking what God gave you. what he supposedly gave you is not HERE. so you'd better go look for it somewhere ELSE."
So then you start to SEEK. And this seeking is like running away from what God gave you. And what God gave you is inside you, so you're running away fromyourself.
As Jesus says, all forms of sickness are produced by seeking externally outside of yourself. What this means is, if you believe and assert that you do not already HAVE what God has given you, that's actually an ATTACK on your invulnerability. And that attack now means that you are attempting to believe that a) you are not as God created you (you are sick), b) you have lack and emptiness in you (death), and c) you will not find God by going within (separation).
Then you go off looking for... basically yourself, for God.... anywhere OTHER than where it is. The ego's made sure you believe its not in you, and you don't have it, and you are not yourself, and God is not in your mind, so now you look everywhere ELSE for it. You therefore are now looking "outside yourself", somewhere beyond your is-ness, to try to find what you think you lack.
And as you do this, you are compounding the belief that you are lacking, that you're empty, that God is not with you for some reason, that you don't have health, that you are less than whole, that you are diminished and void in some way. And all of those attack thoughts produce SICKNESS. They are like evil curses.
Then as you seek, looking everywhere but where you'll find God/Self, out in the world, or even in the body, you WILL NOT FIND IT. You've separated yourself from it, so now you are blind to it, and aware UNAWARE of its presence, so you literally do not see it. You will therefore keep hunting around in the dark, worried, afraid, desperate that you need to get this 'something' back, and yet you will not find it. The 'it' is not out there, beyond your Self. The 'it' as God is not separate from you, lost in some world somewhere.
So you will then "seek and not find". And you'll not find pretty hard. And especially if your believe in being lacking in some way is strong, e.g. unworthy, or imperfect, or flawed, or whatever, you will be compelled even more strongly to SEEK. And yet the harder you seek, where the 'it' is not, i.e. outside of you, the more you will fail to find it. And you'll grow really frustrated that you are coming up empty handed and being led on wild goosechases. But, if you're really steeped in this belief in how much you are lacking, you'll still have yet another attempt at finding it. You'll tell yourself you didn't look hard enough (because you're defective), and that can be a vicious circle.
So then you seek and fail and seek harder and fail harder and it gets really desperate and exasperating. You feel like you just can't find a solution. You go into panic. The ego has really got you in its grips. And the fact is, it's because you are looking for something you DID NOT EVEN REALLY LOSE in the first place, in a location that it does not exist. You need to QUESTION THE NEED TO SEEK, by questioning whether it is TRUE that you actually 'lack' in the way that you believe.
So what that then boils down to is, it's a matter of awareness. You have blocks to your awareness which hide from your awareness the presence of everything God already gave you. And if you had full awareness of everything God gave you, you would KNOW that you do not lack ANYTHING and that you have NO NEEDS. Thus no need to seek. The block to awareness is all the ways that the ego tells you, you are not ALREADY fully equipped, that you are not ALREADY complete and whole, that you are not ALREADY holy and perfect, or that you are not ALREADY WITH GOD.
Yes, you are already with God. You just have a block to awareness covering it up.
So we need to stop seeking. After all, people who find, stop seeking, right? You might think that means you have to seek first in order to find second? Well, what if you just find? What if you just accept that you are already in a state of having found yourself, and found God, and that you are in the presence of what you THOUGHT you were lacking? What if you question all of the 'lacking' belief? What if you undo all of the 'don't deserve it' and all of the 'not perfect enough' and all of the 'I'm not God's beloved child'? What will be REVEALED?
The truth!
The truth will set you free, or rather, you will be set free INTO the truth. The truth is, God already loves you, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, you are not lacking at all, you are worthy of unconditional love, you are totally 100% acceptable, you are perfectly innocent and HOLY, and you have absolutely NO REASON to be afraid. All fear stems from a sense of separation from God, i.e. something's gone wrong and now you have to seek. Stop it. No fear is needed, only celebration, that "I was lost and now I'm found". Cus when you're a seeker, you're a loser. When you stop seeking, you win, because then the ego loses.
"Be still and know that I am God." See.