In God's Kingdom, each individual being is also all of the other beings. There is a shared oneness. Everyone is everyone.
"One brother is all brothers. Every mind contains all minds. Such is the truth." "The Sonship is your soul."
Each brother or Son of God actually IS the other brothers, while still being multiple brothers. It is correct to then say, you are the whole sonship. And also, that other person you know, they are also the whole sonship. And everyone in the world, is the whole sonship. And each one of them individually, is each other, as the whole sonship. This is the natural arrangement of the family of God, where every child of God is one with all other children of God.
"We are the Kingdom, WE, the Sons of God."
In the physical world however, bodies were constructed as separation devices. Their purpose was to SPLIT OFF each child of God and prevent them from being one with each other. The body then acts like a prison cell with walls, keeping the whole rest of the sonship out, and locking you inside in isolation. This denies that you share ANYTHING with anyone, and asserts that there is NO oneness.
To enter into the bodily state, you enter into the ego thought system of sin and death. And the body is an expression of the idea of sin and death. "The body is clearly a device for separation"
"The body is the ego's idol; the belief in sin made flesh, and then projected outward. This produces what SEEMS to be a wall of flesh AROUND the mind, keeping it prisoner in a tiny spot of space and time, beholden unto death, and given but an instant in which to sigh and grieve and die in honor of its master."
Once you're in a body, or have identified with a body, or see yourself as less than the whole sonship in any way, you confine yourself to a little tiny speck in space and time, wrapped and trapped in a body, kept apart from everyone else.
This makes you feel alone, and also as though you are the only person inhabiting your body. And everyone else's bodies are only their own bodies, and no-one shares bodies. And indeed there are vast distances between bodies, to ensure they never meet. And even when the two bodies meet, the two people are still alone and separate and do not really touch each other, inside-to-inside.
Such was the physical world made and arranged, so that bodies would act as separation devices to keep everyone apart. To exclude and isolate and make everyone seem different and unequal. The body was designed to always be different, unfamiliar, unalike, and unrecognizable. Such that they turn all brothers into seeming strangers.
Essentially bodies are expressions of the idea of having NO RELATIONSHIPS with others, no connection, no sharing, and no communication. You can't be related to something you're different from.
"Everything the ego perceives is a separate whole, without the relationships that imply BEING."
"You cannot enter into REAL relationship with ANY of God's Sons, unless you love them all, and EQUALLY."
"If you single out PART of the Sonship for your love, you are imposing guilt on ALL your relationships, and MAKING them unreal."
You see a body that you don't remember and you think you never met them before, even though all brothers are part of God's original family. And then it seems like you have to "get to know" people, as if you are starting out with no knowledge of them and have no clue who they are. You ask their name and where they are from and what they do, only because you've been estranged from them for so long you don't even know anything about them.
"It is only the awareness of the body that makes love seem limited. For the body IS a limit on love. The belief in limited love was its origin, and it was MADE to limit the UNlimited. Think not that this is merely allegorical; for it was made to limit YOU."
This is incredibly unnatural. This is the opposite of the nature of the sonship and the reality of heaven. Everyone's unity, everyone's shared nature, everyone's oneness, the fact the each son of God is all sons of God and the one son of God is hidden completely by bodies. Bodies pull the sonship apart and confine them in containment and limitation, isolate them away from each other and don't allow them to share anything.
This was the original intended purpose of the body, to produce slavery to the ego, to worship and exalt the very prison that keeps you bound, and to anchor you in spacetime so that you'll die along with it.
"What could the purpose of the body Be BUT specialness? And it is this that makes it frail and helpless in its own defense. It was CONCEIVED to make YOU frail and helpless. The goal of separation is its curse."
If you look at society in general you'll see that this is a prevalent experience. Everywhere you look there are expressions of individuality in the sense that, each person is their body, and is not another body. The law of the land looks to what one body does to another. You are held responsible for your body's actions, but not those of others. And everyone thinks in terms of "only me".
My house, my car, my food, my television shows, my toys, my bed, my kitchen, my toilet, my day, my life, my separate isolated experience, my unique loneliness, my exclusive specialness, my self-interests, my my me me my my me me. This is the selfishness of the ego thought system, physicalized as bodies. Bodies designed to prevent the sons of God from recognizing or sharing with each other.
We can, however, re-purpose the prisons that the we made in the separation, and use them to help us to transcend the prisons. We can use the body to increase communication, and that doesn't mean to increase talking it means to extend the mind beyond the body's limits and beyond limits of "a solitary identity", beyond exclusion and specialness, to a much broader inclusiveness of everyone.
We can use the body for a higher purpose, but note that the body IS STILL a prison no matter how you use it. It will always be a limit on love. It will always confine and separate and have limited senses. It cannot ever see reality through its eyes and it will not ever enter heaven. So we should be careful to think the body can turn into a physicalization of the freedom of spirit, or that it can be truly holy. But it can serve a holier purpose, within the limits of what it is capable of.
To transcend the body is the body's higher purpose. To use the body to learn that you are not a body. To use the body to render the body unnecessary. To use the very device of separation against itself, so that we move past the body's limits. In this view the body actually is recognized as having NO FUNCTION.
"Your brother's body is as little use to you as it is to him. When it is used ONLY as the Holy Spirit teaches, it has no function. For minds NEED not the body to communicate. The sight that SEES the body, has no use which serves the purpose of a holy relationship."
In effect, the body and its limits needs to get out of the way. In fact a holy relationship should be a way of actually relating BEYOND the body, transcending its limits, mind-to-mind, soul-to-soul, and physicality shouldn't even enter into and need not even be a part of the relationship. The mind needs to learn to extend through the body to join with other minds, beyond their bodies. So that we can recognize again our shared oneness. This is why "miracles unite you with your brother."
"Learning must lead BEYOND the body to the re-establishment of the power of the mind IN it. This can be accomplished ONLY if the mind EXTENDS to other minds, and does not ARREST ITSELF in its extension. The arrest of the mind's extension is the cause of all illness, because ONLY EXTENSION IS THE MIND's FUNCTION. Block this, and you have blocked health because you have BLOCKED THE MIND's JOY."
Our challenge then is to learn how to ignore the body's imposed limits, transcend its boundaries through transcendental vision, move the mind through and beyond it to join with other minds, overlook all physical objects of spacetime which were designed to keep everyone separate, and rejoin the sonship. Not just to return to being a member of the collective mind, but to learn to recognize YOU ARE EVERYONE, and NOT just this one little tiny body self.
"Nothing the body's eyes seem to see can be anything but a form of temptation, since this was the purpose of the body itself. Yet we have learned that the Holy Spirit has another use for all the illusions you have made, and therefore He sees another purpose in them. To the Holy Spirit, the world is a place where you learn to forgive yourself what you think of as your sins. In this perception, the physical appearance of temptation becomes the spiritual recognition of salvation."
"Yet what makes them God's teachers is their recognition of the proper purpose of the body. As they advance in their profession, they become more and more certain that the body's function is but to let God's Voice speak through it to human ears. And these ears will carry to the mind of the hearer messages which are not of this world, and the mind will understand because of their Source."
"Everyone can use his body best by enlarging man's perception, so he can see the real VISION. THIS VISION is invisible to the physical eye. The ultimate purpose of the body is to render itself unnecessary. Learning to do this is the only real reason for its creation (the only re-purposing of it after it was made)."
"For everyone is seeking to escape from the prison he has made"
"You ARE the Kingdom of Heaven, but you have let the belief in darkness enter your minds, and so you need a new light."
"The Kingdom of Heaven IS you."
In Heaven, God's thought system entails profound sharing. Each part of the system contains the whole of the system. It is holographic. This is how God thinks.
"The recognition of the part as whole, and of the whole in every part, is perfectly natural. For it is the way God thinks, and what is natural to Him is natural to you."
"The whole power of God's son lies in all of us, but not in any of us alone. God would not have us be alone because God does not will to be alone."
"Every altar to God is part of your Soul, because the Light He created is One with Him."
"One brother is all brothers. Every mind contains all minds, for everyone mind is one. Such is the truth."
"Every part is a container of the whole."
In that system, each child God created as a whole, producing multiple wholes, SHARES the whole of creation. That means, you have total access to *everything*, to experience it fully as if it were your own, while simultaneously EVERY other child is doing the same.
The key principle of Heaven, and Creation, is sharing. And so multiple children of God SHARE one mind, and that one mind is the "one son of God". Yet there are many children. Sharing is like "overlapping", literally co-existing in the same space. Your mind is plugged into the whole like how your computer is plugged into the internet and shares the internet with everyone else.
Before the separation idea there were ALREADY multiple individuals. There were already multiple children, who were so UN-SELFISH, that they were willing to SHARE everything with everyone. No-one wanted to be special or to have exclusive access to anything. Everyone was willing to ALLOW all of the others to share everything, themselves, and all that exists. It is the total absence of ownership. It is communal.
When the separation idea occurred, these pre-existing, eternally existing beings, decided to try to seek special favor from God. The idea was that they wanted to have something EXCLUSIVE, just for them, which the others did not have. They wanted to be SPECIAL. They wanted God to give them something which ONLY they had, and which others lacked. They wanted to be better than others. They wanted to be SELFISH. They wanted to find a way to shut out everyone else, to NOT SHARE ANYTHING, and to have something to call "just my own".
This produced a state in which souls, who were many prior to this, surrounded themselves with walls and barricades to try to "shut out" and EXCLUDE, "access", which all other souls had shared with them up to that point. Because even your own soul is something to be shared, you tried to not allow yourself to be shared WITH others. You put up a fence around your mind, to serve two functions: to keep them out, and to keep you in. This way you could fence off a tiny part of yourself and regard it as "exclusively mine", and stop everyone else from SHARING it directly.
In so doing, you withdrew from the collective shared experience of the sonship, you STOPPED SHARING, you went off into a corner and pouted by yourself, you attacked God and your brothers to try to keep them from sharing with you, and you created this illusion that you occupy a little space where NO OTHERS share with you, some kind of autonomous self-owned, self-run, isolated, personal PIECE of the whole, that you wanted to call your own SPECIAL self.
"Everything the ego perceives is a separate whole, without the relationships that imply sharing."
Doing this made you "alone". By trying to not share with anyone else, you stopped the RELATIONSHIPS that come with sharing, you closed the doors on your mind, you prevented access, and you said to the rest of the sonship "stay away, this is my castle and you can't come in." So then you find yourself pulling away from infinity, narrowing down, confining, withdrawing, isolating, imprisoning yourself, into a small tiny area of littleness, and that manifests as the condensing of thought into a BODY. A human body. Which is "a device for separation."
This body will then represent the idea that because you HAVE something exclusive that your BROTHERS do not have, you are now DIFFERENT to them. And this is also why every body is NOT THE SAME, on purpose. It's the idea of being UNLIKE anyone else, not equal, and unlike God. The body keeps all of creation OUT, and traps you IN, so that you can pretend there is some part of existence that is EXCLUSIVELY YOURS.
*THIS*.... is what it means, to have a separate self. It's got NOTHING to do with you being a self or not. It's got nothing to do with the fact that God created MANY SONS prior to the separation, which will CONTINUE after the atonement. It's got nothing to do with you being an individual. It's ONLY got to do with you attempting to NOT SHARE ANYTHING, within a realm where the total sharing of eveything is completely natural for all beings.
"The ego is the idea of selfishness. The soul is the idea of self-fullness."
So by trying to be SELFISH, in the midsts of a SHARED COMMUNITY, to stop communion, to stop communication, to take up arms against your brother, to PUSH OTHERS AWAY, and to try to EJECT them from your own shared experience, so that all that seems to be LEFT is you, THAT is the ego. That is what it means to be "separate". That is the separation IDEA. That's what the course means BY separation.
"Separation", as a word or term, does NOT MEAN, "there are many". It does NOT MEAN, "The presence of multiple brothers is an ego idea." It does NOT MEAN "there can only be one son." The fact there are many WHOLES who are HOLY, is NOT a problem whatsoever in reality. It is NATURAL. It's is God's Will. That you have a self, an individuality, is NATURAL. This has NOTHING to do with the tiny mad idea or separation from God. The separation is ONLY to do with you trying to STOP SHARING, in a realm where sharing is totally natural, prevalent, and something that everyone is doing.
It is not the creation of "a separate self", as if there was NO SELF before. You already HAD a self prior to the separation. The separation from God has NOTHING WHATSOEVER to do with the invention or creation of "a self", or multiple selves. The separation ONLY has to do with your *RELATIONSHIP* to others, your willingness NOT TO SHARE WITH THEM, and your attempt to EVICT THEM from sharing with you, so that all you end up with is YOUR SELF, in isolation, sharing with no-one. That's what the separation from God is all about.
The reversal of the separation from God will reconnect you to the sonship, restore your willingness to share everything with everyone that exists forever, join your mind back to other people's minds, make you willing to share your SELF with others and theirs with you, and to return to this state of Oneness, in which there is ONE MIND, but MULTIPLE BEINGS. Many souls, who are all alike and who share *everything* with each other without a single ounce of selfishness or possessiveness. THAT is heaven. That is natural. The end of separation and ego is NOT the annihilation of God's children, OR the end of your brothers.
So the separation from God merely means the rejection of a shared experience, and the attempt to bring an end to sharing, so that you can claim exclusive rights to some little piece of the whole that you don't want to share with others.
Having a separate self merely means your ACTUAL self is trying to pretend that it no longer SHARES anything with others, and so is "outside of" the shared communal experience AS IF it were "separate from it".
The ego, as the separate self, is nothing other than the rejection of the fact that you are PART OF everyone and are part of the WHOLE, as a SELFISH attempt to OWN part of the whole and call it your own, at the expense of others. It's your attempt to BLOCK ACCESS to your mind, from other minds, so that you SEEM not to be part of the whole anymore. When the ego ends, you simply stop being selfish and LEARN TO SHARE AGAIN. That's not the end of your SELF, ever. You in fact REGAIN more of yourself than you even have now, you expand your self, and you return to the WHOLE of yourself. "The soul is the idea of self-fullness."
So when we're talking about there being many sons in heaven, or many children, or "separate beings", we're NOT in any way talking about anything unnatural or against God's will. We're not even talking about the ego, or the separation idea, or the tiny mad idea. It's not until the MANY REAL BEINGS, the MANY PERMANENT BROTHERS, trying to compete with each other and vie for attention and be SPECIAL, that we start talking about the descent into ego, and the making of an illusory experience of "being separate". To be cut off in a body is to be ALONE, having disallowed anyone else to SHARE YOU. That's all it means to "be a separate self." A seeming outsider or stranger, cut off from the rest and having no relationships with anyone.
God's creation is perfectly natural containing multiple wholes, multiple individuals, multiple selves, multiple brothers, multiple beings, multiple minds. Because they all are willing to SHARE unconditionally and 100% with each other, coexisting in a communal state of total joining and freedom. It's only when someone starts trying to be special or selfish that we run into a problem. The end of the ego is the end of isolation, the end of exclusion, the end of selfishness, and a return to STILL EXISTING but SHARING EVERYTHING with everyone forever. The regaining of your natural inheritance, which is all of Heaven and all beings.
"We have also emphasized that man, insofar as the term relates to Soul, has not only been fully Created, but also has been created perfect. There is no emptiness in him."
"There can be no disinherited parts of the sonship, for God is whole, and all his extensions are like him."
"For in your part lies ALL of it, without which no part is complete, nor is the whole completed without your part."
"Though every aspect IS the whole, you cannot KNOW this, until you see that every aspect is the same, perceived in the same light, and therefore one."
"I cannot see in darkness but in light"
"God is the light in which I see."
"Eternity will shine away the world."
"The world will disappear in light."
In ACIM there is a theme of the relationship of light and dark. We're simply told light dispels darkness, and that really there is no such thing as darkness. Darkness is a label for the illusion of a "lack of light". Essentially this means there is either light or a lack of light, and darkness isn't "a real thing". It's similar to saying there is love or a lack of love, but there isn't real evil. This is forgiving because it recognizes either love or a call for love and doesn't regard the "lack of love" as a state that's real or "actually evil."
That said, when we dreamed of death and made a world, which includes Earth, and all bodies, we made these things by pretending there is a lack of light. And this absence of light seems to show up as darkness, as if to say it is "made of darkness". As soon as you switch from realizing there is only light or its lack, to believing that the lack of light is itself something which can CAUSE light to go away, you start to believe that the darkness is real and that "darkness can hide." It's the belief that darkness has power, is evil, is real, and is capable of forcing light to be dispelled. It's nothing other than the mistaken belief in sin - a dark thought being able to attack the light of God. It's a level confused idea.
In truth, since there is only light or its illusion of absence, when light is supplied, the illusion of the lack of light disappears. Miracles supply a lack. Once the "lack of light" is overcome by supplying the light, and the light is present, there simply is no lack of light any more and so "the darkness" simply vanishes. In the presence of light there is no darkness. That which seemed to be "made of darkness" is really just light's seeming absence, and now that light has arrived, that which was "made of darkness" must be shone away and disappear. It really was only an illusion of darkness seeming to exist, when in fact it was nothing. Darkness isn't real.
For example, when clouds block the sun from shining, and the sun is still shining beyond the clouds, the underside of the clouds seem to become dark because it now seems as if the clouds have the power to block the light. The clouds are symbolic of the idea that darkness has power over the light and can prevent light from extending. Blocks to awareness do the same thing. But the fact is that the clouds only become dark because of the seeming illusion of an absence of light, not because clouds are inherently dark. They are made of transparent water. When light shines upon them, they are not dark at all. They are seen IN the light WITH light and this light thus dispels the belief that "the clouds are dark". Darkness is an illusion.
Similarly with shadows, a shadow is merely the illusion of an absence of light. When light shines onto the area which was "in shadow", the shadow disappears. Light always has power over darkness EVEN in this dream world. Whenever the light comes, darkness simply vanishes and whatever evil figures seemed to be made of darkness, absolutely cease to be. It has no protest, it has no power, it has no way to prevent itself from being shone away. Darkness has no defense against the light. It simply disappears because it wasn't really a thing in its own right, it was just the absence of light. Once the absence of God is supplied, once love is given to those who lack the love, the absence of love is restored to love and all seeming illusions and manifestations of darkness simply disappear. Light corrects the darkness by showing that there is no darkness, just as atonement shows there is no sin.
Light has power over darkness because there is no REAL opposite to light. Darkness is not reality. Light is reality. Darkness, as the opposite to light, is just an illusion of darkness and so the light always has power over it. Light is permanently true and unchangeable. Darkness is a temporary illusion that what is permanent is not permanent. Darkness is a lie, a deception. It doesn't really exist.
The world, which we made, with bodies, are all made out of darkness. They are the "absence of light" attempting to be maintained by minds that are trying to believe light is not present. And so they are trying withhold their light in order to stop the shining in order to make it seem like there is a "hole" in the light where light has become absent, where heaven has turned into hell. And then it becomes easy to believe, the seeming lack of light - which is showing up as darkness - is actually a "real darkness", as if the darkness itself is a thing in its own right, with a power and a will and a causality and capable of causing light to go away. Like since when did darkness ever have the ability to resist light? But while we believe there is a world here, we are believing that darkness has power over light. We're looking at nothing but an illusion of light's seeming absence, not real darkness. When light is allowed to shine and enter, light's absence is corrected and there is now no darkness for the world to be made of.
Given also that the world and bodies are all "made of darkness" or are the illusion of light's absence, when the light comes, those things will be shone away. When we are no longer interested in making illusions or playing with this idea that we can cause the light to be harmed or affected and caused to leave by our dark powers, we will simply allow light to shine and it WILL shine away the world and the body. They must be shone away because they are ONLY the illusion of the absence of light. When the light comes, the world has to disappear. All shadows must disappear. The body must disappear. They cannot coexist with the light because they are founded entirely on light's absence. Any more than the ego, which is darkness, can go into the light and keep its darkness. This is why that which is "made of darkness" cannot enter the light or have any ability to attack God's Kingdom.
This is also why "a forgiven world cannot last." If you forgive the world you are shining a light ONTO the world, illuminating it, and thereby SHINING IT AWAY, because it is made of light's absence and when the light comes the absence is corrected and undone, light replaces darkness, and so the world which was the illusion of light being absent, is shone away and undone. This is why ACIM says that "the world will disappear in light" and "the world will spin into the nothingness from which it came". You cannot forgive a world, shine light onto it, see it in light, and expect it to stay IF it is not made of light. And this world, Earth, is not made of light - it is the idea of sin which is the idea of darkness being able to hide or block the light of Heaven. As soon as there is light, there is no world. This is also why there are no worlds or bodies in Heaven - darkness does not exist there and these things are completely "made of" darkness. The illusion that there is no light. They were made to block the light. They cannot enter or be in the light and maintain their state of darkness, thus they cannot exist at all.
This is why eternity will eventually shine away the world. The world, its forms, its bodies, which are all lack of light, will become filled with light so much that the light will dispel the lack of light, and so all of the forms will be shone away entirely. They will leave absolutely no trace in their going because they were always illusions of darkness or light's absence. Temporarily, the world may seem to become a shining reflection of Heaven or to be so filled with light ("I am the light of the world") that it seems heaven-like... but only temporarily, in a transition from dark to light, because when enough light has shone upon it, it will be so infused with light its darkness simply MUST vanish. When the light becomes brilliant, intense, powerful and full, there is nowhere for darkness to exist or hide, and all things "made of darkness" will vanish as if they never existed. The world will be healed away.
So long as forms and objects are maintained, there is a protest against light and an attempt to block it. Physical objects are blocks to the light just as they are blocks to awareness. They are made of the idea of sin, the suggestion that darkness can block the light and have power over the light. This is why "to see a sinless body is impossible" - you cannot look upon sin unless you are sinful and when you are purely innocent you can see nothing but light. And this is why you cannot truly be 100% in the light of heaven, while having a body.
The light (of the great rays for example) will literally fill the void where the body was pretending to exist, and replace it, filling up the gap with light, since the body is nothing but the illusion that there is a lack of light or a block to light. The body is what a lack of light "looks like", something dark and an obstacle to light seemingly capable of obscuring it. And since the body blocks light, it also blocks the mind and awareness of truth and atonement. "The body is a limit" "The body cannot stay." So long as the body is present at all, it is blocking light or demonstrating that darkness still exists.
There are no obstacles to light in the living world of light, which is Heaven. There are no bodies, forms, objects, walls, or anything that can keep light from being absolutely infinite and intensely brilliant everywhere. There is nowhere "lacking light" for the body to seem to exist. There is only light everywhere.
"Nothing there but shines and shines forever."
"Only the creations of light are real."
The only real feelings are those whose nature is in alignment with God's, and which apply to and are shared with everyone equally, openly and freely. These include love, joy, happiness, peace. There are other feelings, which arise in and of the ego, such as guilt, fear, grief, loss, unhappiness, sadness, gratification, loneliness, abandonment, unworthiness, etc.
In every case, all of the ego emotions are two-faced, because they are all happening in a split mind. On the surface they all appear to be something we are familiar with, but there is always an aspect to them which is doing exactly the opposite from what it appears. This is because they are all illusions, and illusions are deceptive.
In fear, we may on the surface experience a sense of "I don't want this", "I wish this would go away", "leave me alone", "I'm not safe and want to be" etc. But if you look more honestly you'll notice these are all attack thoughts. "I want you to go away" is a murderous idea. "I wish this would stop" is an attempt to destroy. "I hope this doesn't happen" is an attempt to withdraw freedom and to imprison through control.
Fear can be particularly slippery and deceptive because it is quite far down the chain of ego delusions, not far short of punishment and death. It can feel like a total powerlessness, a desire not to cause any harm, a kind of innocence and vulnerability. But at the same time, it is all of these things because it's a state of intense attack, picturing others as sinful and powerful, believing in threat and danger, and making attack very real. Fear is an attempt to choose to be hurt, while claiming not to want it or to cause it.
In grief, we will feel heavy emotions of loss and separation. These feel terrible and say things on the surface such as "I wish they weren't gone", "I want them back", "why did they leave", "there has been a real loss". But if you then look more honestly you'll notice, these are all attempts to make a person body identified, to anchor them in the illusory world, to drag them back into hell.
The grief asserts that the person as a body was real, and this real thing was valued, and now this real thing is really lost through separation (death). And how awful that is. Except that its real assertion is to attempt to commit the person to death, body imprisonment, isolation, special relationships and keeping the illusion of real bodies going. Nothing real is ever lost. But grief quite often includes anger at the person for leaving, which is a belief in real separation and an attack idea.
Unworthiness is another lie we may experience. It seems to suggest a sense of not deserving God's love. Of having sinned or committed some crime, proving that you should not be loved or forgiven. But God is always loving unconditionally. So it is not God who is claiming you are unworthy.
Which means you are claiming it, for a reason. And the ego's reason is to keep God's love at arms length. So while on the surface it seems to say "I wish God would love me" "I don't deserve God to love me", it really says "I want God not to love me and will stay in my pity and not accept my worthiness." It's an attempt to push love away, which is vengeance. The victim mentality always feels sorry for itself while secretly being vicious.
Guilt is yet more bullshit. The guilty feel like they are remorseful and regret committing a sin. The guilt feels like a wish that you hadn't done something, that you really did do it, and should be guilty for doing it. But the guilt does not ever question whether or not what you did was a real sin, or that is really happened. It just assumes sin occurred, locks it in, makes sure the belief in sin will never be undone, and that you "should" automatically be guilty.
It's a desire to be unforgivable, which is a self attack. Guilt actually protects the sin and keeps the belief in it going. So those who are guilty claim "I wish I didn't feel guilty" "I'm sorry for doing it", the honest fact is that the guilt asserts "I believe it did happen" "It was real" "I'm glad I sinned and I want to keep its consequences." And so the guilt is really fake guilt, a dishonest state of feeling.
We could go on and list more ego emotions but they are really all the same in their dynamics. All of them are various stages of denial and two-faced victimhood. All of them are deceptive and dishonest. All of them present a surface appearance which seems, consciously, to be "all there is to it", but have a deeper deception which lies beneath.
When you look at them in the bigger picture perspective, it becomes clearer that they are all literally forms of lying to oneself. None of them are genuine because none of them are whole states of mind. All of them are unfounded and unjustified. They represent a divided will, attempting to achieve two outcomes and pretending only to want one thing. They are all forms of attack and deliberately chosen for a purpose. And they all serve to further the descent into hell.
It can be difficult to recognize this and acknowledge it, but we must. We need to become clear about what these illusions are so that we can no longer be deceived by them, or attempt to use them or go into them in efforts to respond to problems. If we tried to kill God through sin and now are feeling guilty, we don't REALLY feel guilty. We wanted to do it and believe in it. We have to own the power of decision and responsibility for choosing otherwise the secret of salvation has exceptions, and that cannot be or we'd be stuck in hell.
We are free willed beings, which means that nothing happens against our will. Even our dreams of hell are chosen. All our suffering is a mistaken choice. All our sickness is a defense with a purpose. Nothing happens without our consent, not even death. No-one else is to blame. We are free to will whatever we want to happen, and nothing else happens without our will.
""My Self is ruler of the universe." - "It is impossible that anything should come to me unbidden by myself. Even in this world, it is I who rule my destiny. What happens is what I desire. What does not occur is what I do not want to happen. This must I accept."
God cannot be held accountable for why we feel guilty or shameful or unworthy. All attempts at dismay, grief, horror, upset and disturbance are not the unwanted victim roles that they seem to be. No-one else is causing any of our feelings, and the belief that they are is an ego state of false perception. There is ALWAYS more going on than meets the eye and there is always a use of free will to elect to suffer.
All of these fake feelings, indeed all forms of suffering and sickness and death, are simply expressions of an attempt to keep God away. They are excuses made up out of nowhere. They are asserts of denial.
They attempt to weave stories about "why" we cannot be with God or why we cannot accept atonement and forgiveness. They are attempts to portray our immortal selves as mortal and suffering. Everything about them is a lie. They are totally unfounded.
The fact is that there is no reason to be away from God and nothing keeping you from doing so. There is nothing to be afraid of. There is no sin to be guilty for. There is no real way for an immortal being to suffer because nothing real can be threatened. And therefore there is no REAL reason to feel anything other than the REAL feelings that you share with God.
All forms of ego feeling and thinking are attempts to invent completely made-up validations or justifications or rationalizations for why we aren't with God. And these are all self fulfilling. Our egotism says we are afraid of God, but we're not. There is no reason to be afraid of God. It has to be fake fear, and it's only being held onto to try to pretend we have a valid reason to stay in this state. This entire world is a lie we're telling not to accept the Kingdom.
If we were to admit that there is no sin, guilt, fear, unworthiness, suffering, sickness, death, misery, unhappiness, etc, what would happen? Without these defenses, where would we be and what would we be experiencing?
The attractiveness, loving nature, beauty and gentleness of God would lift us into his light and return us home to reality. The whole purpose of the ego is to try to claim we are not with God and to hold him at arms length, and to do that we need various devices that "prove why" we are not with him.
None of these ego emotions are true. None of them are what they seem to be. And all of them are simply made-up lies attempting to create reasons why we don't want to wake up. And none of these reasons have any real foundation whatsoever. If God does not feel this way, nor should we. If we feel this way, we seem not to be with God. But we want to feel otherwise and so are willing to accept correction.
"All forms of sickness even unto death are physical expressions of the fear of awakening."
"Sickness is an attempt to prove you can be hurt."
"You cannot be hurt unless you hurt yourself."
"No one dies without their own consent."
"Nothing except your thoughts can attack you. Nothing except your thoughts can make you think you are vulnerable. And nothing except your thoughts can prove to you this is not so."
"It is your thoughts alone that cause you pain. Nothing external to your mind can hurt or injure you in anyway. There is no cause beyond yourself that can reach down and bring oppression. No one but yourself affects you. There is nothing in the world that has the power to make you ill or sad, or weak or frail. But it is you who have the power to dominate all things you see by merely recognizing what you are."
"There is no world! This is the central thought the course attempts to teach."
Everything in the course culminates with the clear recognition of what is true, and what is false. What is real, and what is unreal. What exists, and what does not.
This includes the recognition that THERE IS NO WORLD. It does not exist. Recognizing this IS forgiveness. This is the mindset in which wrong-mindedness ends, and right-mindedness automatically transitions to one-mindedness.
Jesus tells us that we are to become aware of dreaming. What this means is we become aware that the world IS A DREAM. We recognize it as ONLY a dream. And therefore we are not deceived by it.
"The dream says otherwise, but who would put his faith in dreams once they are recognized for what they are? Awareness of dreaming is the real function of God's teachers. They watch the dream figures come and go, shift and change, suffer and die. Yet they are not deceived by what they see."
"Forgiving dreams are kind to everyone who figures in the dream. And so they bring the dreamer full release from dreams of fear."
Recognizing that the world is a dream, and NOT a reality, ties into the secret of salvation. The secret tells you that provided you do not mistake the dream for reality, you will not react to it. This is the SINGLE LESSON that the Holy Spirit teaches.
"For you would not react at all to figures in a dream you knew that YOU were dreaming. Let them be as hateful and as vicious as they may, they COULD have no effect on you, unless you failed to recognize it is YOUR dream. This single lesson learned will set you free from suffering, WHATEVER form it takes."
"The Holy Spirit will repeat this ONE inclusive lesson of deliverance, until it has been learned, REGARDLESS of the form of suffering that brings you pain. Whatever hurt you bring to Him, He will make answer with this very simple truth."
This means that you attain salvation by recognizing that the world is not real and does not exist. By recognizing it IS A DREAM, not a reality, you don't give it any credit, any truth, any reality, or any value. You know that you are dreaming it, but you are not deceived by it. And therefore you are not confused by notions that the dream is doing anything TO YOU, or that events are happening, or that sin is real, or that attack is occurring, or that anyone is really suffering.
The view that there is no world is like a KEY, which unlocks the door to heaven. It is not just information or some fact to learn. It is the atonement. It is forgiveness. It requires you to SEE and EXPERIENCE from a healed-mind vantage point, which sees that the world is only fiction and not real. And this places you OUTSIDE the dream. It puts you in a position of recognizing also:
"Only the truth is true, and nothing else is true."
and "Nothing unreal exists."
It's a clear distinction between what the real truth IS, and what it ISN'T. And therefore it frames the world in the light of truth, SHOWING that it is a false world and really is NOTHINGNESS. That there isn't even REALLY a world there. And in the cancelling of the world, the illusion is seen through, and disappears. And this leaves ONLY HEAVEN.
"Heaven is all that remains."
"Heaven remains your one alternative to the strange world you made."
"There is no life outside of heaven."
That there is no world, is an assertion that there IS ONLY HEAVEN. It is the resurrection because it is the assertion of life. It is sanity because it acknowledges only God's truth is true. And is salvation because in this awareness, you realize that ONLY GOD and His creation exists.
God is at peace because He knows that there is not really a world here. Nothing unreal exists. And since nothing unreal exists, nothing evil, dark, dangerous, harmful, bad, wrong, etc exists either. Thus there is no suffering, no sickness, no death, no guilt or fear or sin, and no space or time. And ALL THAT IS LEFT is the good, the immortal, the true and the holy. And this makes you feel very safe and happy.
Essentially this requires us to realize, fully, and to perceive, that this world we made IS NOTHING. It is made of nothingness, pretending to be something. When we are deceived by its illusion of existing, we are tempted to believe nothing exists. But when we see through it, we remember that nothingness does NOT exist, and so the world of nothingness does not exist.
"...as the world spins into the nothingness from which it came."
"The body is clearly a device for separation and therefore does not exist."
"At no time does the body exist."
The entire message is EXTREMELY PIVOTAL. The reason is to do with uprooting the ENTIRE PREMISE of the ENTIRE ego thought system, and that system IS this universe. All of space and time are the ego's system of thinking.
"Every system of thought must have a starting point. It begins with either a making or a creating, a difference we have already discussed."
God is the logical premise of truth, the original starting point of creation, and the origin from which all extension and expression happens. Creation is the logical outcome of his premise and truth. And everything that comes from Him is based on His nature.
In the separation, we attempted to REPLACE the premise of truth with a FALSE premise. The false premise was the belief that everything STARTS with the OPPOSITE TO GOD. The opposite of reality, eternal life, truth, happiness, love, health, wholeness, unlimitedness, etc. The assertion of the opposite to God is the ego and the world.
"Earth, heaven's opposite in every way."
"And EVERYTHING here takes a direction EXACTLY opposite to what is true."
The world is nothing other than the idea that what IS NOTHING, is something. What DOES NOT exist, exists. What CANNOT HAPPEN, is happening. What is IMPOSSIBLE, is possible. What is NOT alive, is alive. What IS alive, is dead. What IS false, is true. It is the negation of reality and the opposite to God.
Atonement is the clear recognition that the world IS NOT what it claims to be. IT IS false, it is non-existent, it is an illusion, it is not real, it is not happening, and it is entirely fictional. Recognizing this is awareness of dreaming, the clear true perception that nothing in the world is real. Remembering it is just a dream. And therefore having NO reaction TO it, remembering that IT IS NOT THERE.
Seeing this is to OVERLOOK the world, which is forgiveness, and is what shows you the forgiven world. "A world forgiven cannot last". To forgive the world is to NOT SEE IT. Because "forgiveness does not look upon bodies". Christ vision sees PAST and BEYOND the world. The world is a thin veil which becomes transparent and vanishes when reality is acknowledged AS real, and "illusions recognized must disappear."
By changing the PREMISE of this world back to its ACTUAL premise, which is that the world is founded on a FALSE IMPOSSIBLE IDEA, rather than being confused that the world is founded on the truth and reality of God, this REFRAMES everything in the world. Even just remembering "this is just a dream" does this. It completely changes the MEANING of everything that happens. It completely INVALIDATES all notions of this being an ACTUALLY sinful, guilty, bad, wrong, dark, twisted, threatening, dangerous, suffering world. Because what everything IS is completely turned upside down when you realize it IS ONLY HAPPENING IN A DREAM.
There is no world.
There is no body.
There is no solar system.
There are no galaxies.
There is no space.
There is no time.
There is no sin.
There is no guilt.
There is nothing to fear.
There is no sickness.
There is no death.
There is no matter.
There is no universe.
There is no decay.
There is no malfunction.
There is no problem.
There is no attack.
There is no war.
There is no conflict.
There is no disease.
There is no history.
There is no ANYTHING THAT YOU CAN THINK OF THAT'S IN THIS WORLD.
Remembering there is no world, makes you feel instantly happy. This is the PROPER USE OF DENIAL. To deny the denial of the truth. Because there is no world, EVERY SINGLE THREAT that you believe in does not exist. ALL attacks are not happening. EVERY sickness is an illusion and no one is really sick. DEATH doesn't even exist. This SETS YOU FREE. And this is what ACIM is trying to teach us. To become COMPLETELY clear that there IS no world AT ALL, there never was, and only God's Kingdom remains as it always has. The recognition of this is enlightenment, and this is how you awaken to Heaven.
"W-pI.132.6. But it is pride that argues you have come into a world quite separate from yourself, impervious to what you think, and quite apart from what you chance to think it is. 2 There is no world! 3 This is the central thought the course attempts to teach. 4 Not everyone is ready to accept it, and each one must go as far as he can let himself be led along the road to truth. 5 He will return and go still farther, or perhaps step back a while and then return again.
W-pI.132.7. But healing is the gift of those who are prepared to learn there is no world, and can accept the lesson now. 2 Their readiness will bring the lesson to them in some form which they can understand and recognize. 3 Some see it suddenly on point of death, and rise to teach it. 4 Others find it in experience that is not of this world, which shows them that the world does not exist because what they behold must be the truth, and yet it clearly contradicts the world.
W-pI.132.8. And some will find it in this course, and in the exercises that we do today. 2 Today's idea is true because the world does not exist. 3 And if it is indeed your own imagining, then you can loose it from all things you ever thought it was by merely changing all the thoughts that gave it these appearances. 4 The sick are healed as you let go all thoughts of sickness, and the dead arise when you let thoughts of life replace all thoughts you ever held of death."
In ACIM there is a very strong theme, based on the Golden Rule, which describes a dynamic we are all supposed to adopt. It's the idea that giving and receiving are one.
"giving and receiving are the same" UrW225
In fact, that entire phrase appears SIX times in the course.
It is the backbone of the Golden Rule, which is a law of God, that what you do unto another YOU directly DO unto yourself. And this is on the basis that your brother - other people - are a PART OF YOU. And therefore, what you do to them, you literally are doing to the part of you that is SHARED with them.
But think about this for a moment, because it really makes NO SENSE AT ALL. Jesus presents it with what appears to be a nice voodoo-sounding phrase, which is laden with impossibilities:
"Therefore, His teaching begins with the lesson: To HAVE, GIVE all TO ALL." UrT6F13
How on earth, can you give everything, to everyone, and still HAVE everything? This defies normal logic, does it not? It does not make sense. Ask anyone in the world how this is possible, they will probably be stumped. It seems totally false.
If I give you my dinner, I will not have my dinner. If I give you my car, I will not have the car. If I give you my money, I will not have the money. HOW can it MAKE SENSE, to say that if I give you everything, I will HAVE IT ALL? Or even worse, that I'm supposed to give what I have ***TO EVERYONE***? How is that even possible?
If you are savvy and paying attention, you should conclude that these kinds of statements MAKE NO SENSE AT ALL. They seem absolutely nonsense. They are totally out of line with what we experience in the world. How can they be true?
The big thing is... Jesus seems to be telling us that it is not only POSSIBLE, but the true law of God, that things which seem impossible to us are the ONLY possibility. That there is some WEIRD way by which something that makes absolutely no sense, IS in fact the truth.
He is telling us that we're supposed to "love others as ourselves" - as we would love ourselves, and knowing that they ARE a part of ourselves. How can this make any sense though? And be careful not to go into denial here and just PRETEND that "you believe it" because it sounds all magical and spiritual.
It seems ONLY to make sense to say that whatever I GIVE, I WILL LOSE. Yes? Have you ever experienced otherwise? Anything you have ever given you have lost. You have had to compromise. You have never been able to keep what you have given to anyone. Why is Jesus telling you that it is some kind of divine law or dynamic or way of relating to others that you're supposed to adopt? What nonsense!
"A miracle is a service. It is the maximal service that one soul can render another. It is a way of loving your neighbor as yourself. The doer recognizes his own and his neighbor's inestimable value simultaneously." UrT1B18A
The thing is.. .. God's truth and laws are nothing like the laws of this world, or the dynamics of ego relationships, or the way by which physical objects interact and relate. What SEEMS to make sense to us here, is in truth absolutely nonsense. And that which SEEMS to be absolutely nonsense, is in fact the truth.
Now... that's a REALLY BIG CLAIM. Because now Jesus is telling us that something that seems to make NO SENSE, is in fact the truth! Nonsense is the truth?! Not only is it the truth, GOD HIMSELF apparently has a nature which makes NO SENSE.
Somehow, we're told, God gives everything to everyone, and yet keeps everything. And, supposedly we're supposed to adopt the same function, of giving everything to everyone, in order to have everything. And he even tells us that if we do NOT give it all away, we will have nothing. WHAT NONSENSE, SURELY?!
"Each Soul knows God completely. This IS the miraculous power of the Soul. The fact that each Soul has this power completely is a fact that is entirely alien to human thinking, in which if any ONE has everything, there is nothing LEFT." UrT3G15
Here for example Jesus is saying not only are there souls created by God (hold that thought), but also that EACH of them knows God COMPLETELY. Which means, that I can have everything, and you can have everything, and we can both have everything simultaneously. WHAT THE F?! .... How can that make any sense at all?
How can you have everything, while I also have everything, without either of us having to compromise or share or take turns? But he's telling us that's how it is. And he describes this dynamic as miraculous - it IS a course in the miraculous, after all.
So here's the big issue. It is CLEARLY evident that all of the things which are true of God, and all of the dynamics of his creation and reality and the workings of his relationships and so on, SEEM TO MAKE ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE.
They entail seemingly mind-bending possibilities, such as you handing over your entire inheritance and still having it all. Such that, in fact, when you give everything, the other person you gave it to now HAS IT ALL, AND YET... you ALSO have it all, which means the total amount HAS INCREASED. F me!
"God Himself created the law by creating BY it. And His Sons, who create LIKE Him, follow it gladly, knowing that the INCREASE of the Kingdom depends on it, just as THEIR creation did." UrT7C7
We're told that the entire Kingdom of God INCREASES, because when you GIVE ALL TO ALL, you still HAVE it all, and now everyone else HAS everything you gave, and now it is DOUBLED. So there is constant increase of everything real. This is a real dynamic in reality. How can this make any sense at all, that when you give stuff away IT MULTIPLIES?!!! What?
What it then boils down to, is that the ultimate truth is, God's nature, the nature of reality and oneness, what is possible, what is a fact, will always SEEM TO MAKE NO SENSE TO YOU. It will in fact seem like a collection of paradoxes. And it will seem like nonsense. And anything that is true WILL seem to be nonsense to your ego, and to your earthly way of thinking, and to the way that you REASON all your conclusions. They are all nonsense.
Here's the climax of my post. There is much debate about oneness and non-duality and so on. And people generally will say that whatever MAKES SENSE, must be the truth. Screw that! God has dynamics which DO NOT make sense to ordinary reasoning. Giving everything away in order to keep it, what?! What's given increases when you give it away, what?! It seems like nonsense. BUT IT IS TRUE.
So you should NOT be quite so certain, that God's reality and workings are supposed to fit nicely into what you think "makes sense". In fact, if you think that God's functioning makes sense based on ordinary reasoning, YOU ARE CONFUSED.
To normal reasoning, God's workings are supposed to look like paradoxes. They are SUPPOSED to look like contradictions. They are SUPPOSED to look like they make no sense at all and can't be true!! Because the reasoning being used to LOOK at it is itself BACKWARDS and false.
The people who thus claim ACIM is non-duality are using backwards reasoning to claim that "oneness" and "it's all God" and "you don't exist" makes perfect sense. That's a total fail. God is capable of BREAKING all your rules and TRANSCENDING all your little limitations and requirements.
ACIM clearly is teaching a transcendental thought system which, to the way that most people think, DOES NOT make sense. And this is supposed to reveal to you, at some point, that THE WAY YOU THINK IS WRONG. Not just what you think, but HOW. Not just the line of your thinking and the conclusions you come to that you THINK make sense, but the entire method and logic that you use to draw conclusions IS MISTAKEN. It is OPPOSITE to the nature of God.
This is why ACIM is not non-duality. Non-duality is far too absent paradoxes. It contains none of the mind-bending transcendence of laws and limits present in the Golden Rule. It has no recognition of the fact that God can do things which SEEM impossible, including the creation of multiple sons/souls who themselves are creators in reality, WITHOUT VIOLATING ONENESS. Which... you guessed it, seems like it would be "totally impossible" and "totally nonsense", BUT ISN'T.
So you should really get used to the fact that reality WILL NOT make sense to your typical reasoning. Your conclusions are all back to front and entirely within the separation-based thought system of the ego. Even non-duality and oneness are ego constructs resulting from a way of reasoning that doesn't even acknowledge the rule-breaking nature of God.
If you think this is not correct, think again. Think again about the facts we're being taught. We're being told to do something that seems TOTALLY COUNTER INTUITIVE. Which seems to run TOTALLY OPPOSITE to how your ENTIRE thought system works. To treat others in the knowledge that they are a part of you, such that what you do to them you do to yourself. That is not something that makes any sense to the world's thinking.
Don't be deceived that making sense of something means it is true. An entire system of thought can have internal consistency and seem to make total sense, and yet be entirely wrong. We are not here in the business of just being a sheep that follows the basic little conclusions the ego comes up with.
"It's all one therefore there can't be many"... nonsense.
"God couldn't create anything otherwise there would be separation" .... nonsense.
"If I exist then I must be an ego" ... nonsense.
"If there are many things in reality then reality is dualistic". ... nonsense.
The truth is FAR more mind-bending and waaaaaaaaay outside the box of how you think about things. If you have not encountered all the paradoxes and found a way to live with them, you are still squarely locked into the ego's thought system.
"ACIM is non-dualistic" is a conclusion drawn by egos following all of the ego's rules of separation-based reasoning, without showing the slightest sign of appreciation for God's PARADOXICAL nature, in which two completely opposite-seeming things can be simultaneously true, WITHOUT it being wrong.
If you think everything about God's nature has to sound like it makes nice tidy sense, you haven't even begun to recognize what God is like. God is a creator, and oneness DOES have real parts to it, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that fact at all. If YOU see a gross contradiction, YOU have not escaped the ego's mindset.
I think this runs somewhat against the expectations of many ACIM students, but at the physical and personality level we are all considerably different. No two bodies are identical. There are many many sub-types of human bodies, brains, nervous systems, outlooks, orientations, races, gender identities, etc. We are not all the same in terms of human bodies, never were, and never will be. Everything physical is, at best, similar, but not equal.
When there comes to be a social "norm" where we think there's a normal way to be, a normal type of person, a normal interaction style, a normal behaviour, a normal way to process information etc, it becomes a way to create a "closet". People start to feel ashamed for being different, ashamed for having difficulties matching up to the expected behaviour.
An obvious example is in the case of gay/queer people whereby, quite literally their bodies and brains are different. A gay person does not have the "wiring" to produce experiences of excitation and attraction to members of the opposite sex, or at least this "ability" is altered and in a different ratio. A trans-sexual person may have a wildly different sense of gender identity compared to their physical biology. There is science to confirm that gay people have different pheromones, different brain structures, different chemistry.
Another example is in terms of the differences between extroverted and introverted people, or those who are highly sensitive compared to those who are not. The extroverted people find release and stress-processing through social connection and external ways to work through things. This totally does not work for an introverted person who needs to go within, withdraw, process deeply and reflect. When either of these become an expected "norm" the other group becomes ashamed and repressed.
It's far better that we realize that on the physical and personality level, the human level, and to a degree in the mind as well since it is influenced by the brain wiring, that we are a collection of highly discordant, highly differentiated "persons". There is not a norm, there is not a standard, there is not a one-size-fits all, there is not a "we are all one" on this level. There is no such thing as physical oneness or physical equality. The idea of making the human race have a "physical oneness" must be completely destroyed. Oneness only works in the mind, not the body, and trying to make it work for bodies is insane and backwards.
I've been working with ACIM for over 20 years now and have gone through a lot of healing and transformation. But in spite of this, my body is still largely wired the same way it was years ago. It is still highly sensitive and introverted, my nervous system is still wired to process deeply rather than broadly, I still need down time to catch up with the processing, I still at times am shy and finding it harder to push out expressions and open up emotionally. These are physical traits rooted in how my brain is structured, regardless of my spiritual aspirations at the mind level. I work in abstracts and symbols and metaphors and subtle nuances, which is not true of most people.
You'll notice that as people work on spiritual awakening their body stays much the same. It may heal, it may seem more alive, it may seem healthier or younger, but it still has its accent, it still moves with similar mannerisms, there's still the same collection of language, there's the same eyes and mouth, the same height, the same weight, the same muscles and sense of motion. These things aren't really going to change because they're part of the body. Waking up more doesn't suddenly turn your body into a spiritual thing because it can't be that. It's a body, not a spirit.
Trying to expect bodies to be more spiritual is a spiritualisation of the physical, which is a form of level confusion. The physical can't be spiritual because it is not spirit. Trying to expect human physical persons to shed the wiring and uniqueness and differences that are hardwired into their physical makeup is highly unrealistic. Trying to act spiritual or look spiritual or trying to get the body to stop having its quirks is going to be extremely difficult if not impossible.
I would say that to some degree I have become more understanding of, at peace with, and perhaps a bit more masterful of working WITH the limitations of my physicality, but I wouldn't say that the physical has stopped being the way it always was. My mind has changed and that perhaps means that I now operate the body differently, but it still largely looks similar, moves similar, processes information similarly as before. I still have high sensitivity and am easily overwhelmed with too much input. I still fart and pee and shit and sleep and all that.
I see sometimes that people expect that they're going to turn into a butterfly or something as they work on their spiritual path. Doing workbook lessons for example doing meditations, starts to seem like it's going to cause a persons perception to change so much that they become non-physical. And in other words, that they won't be able to function on the physical level anymore. And yet, there they are, using the same physical body and the same eyes and the same brain to physically perceive the same book which still looks exactly the same with the same physical pages as before. The physical stuff barely changes at all.
So I think it would be healthy for us to acknowledge that we each are working with a distinct, specific, limited, quirky, and DIFFERENT type of physical body to everyone else. And this physical body brings with it unique challenges, unique wiring, unique preferences, unique pros and cons, unique talents and limitations. We're NOT all the same on this level. And it's okay to sort of embrace the way that you are different, the kind of body device you are having to work with, and it's okay to treat "your self" with kindness and acknowledgement even if it does not work for other people.
If your body has needs, if your brain has needs, if certain types of interactions or relationships or environments or people or whatever don't work for you, that's fine. It's likely to do with how your body is wired. Yes you can change some things psychologically but the body itself cannot actually ever be whole, cannot be spiritual, cannot be like as swiss army knife, cannot do all things in all ways with all people and all situations, and does not have every ability that everyone else has.
Letting "yourself" off the hook for it to be okay to be NOT like other people, to have your own path, to go your own way, to do things in your own style, to have your own needs and boundaries, to dislike some things that other people like, to not want to participate in certain things that other people tout as ideal, is totally fine. Most of these "preferences" are totally rooted in how the physical body is made up and how the brain is connected, how the personality is structured and what that makes you feel comfortable with (or not).
We're all working on transcending these limits and things but we shouldn't be in denial that the body has its own very unique persuasion which is not very likely to completely match anyone else on the planet. I like most spiritual people want to 'become' or remember being the perfect soul that God created, my true self, my real self, but I highly highly doubt that this is going to change the nature, shape, color, style, orientation, workings, mannerisms, cycles, or character of my physical body in any significant way.
The body is an encounter suit. It's not you, but it IS a major limit and it does have major differences to other bodies. We can't pretend that's not true at this level. We're trying to rise above it and not identify with it and not use that to keep us from God, but at the same time we also don't want to get into people-pleasing and trying to fit into something that we are not comfortable with. It's okay to be different while you're working on trying to become "all the same" and "one" with everyone in spirit.
I've yet to see a single awakening person whose speaking voice suddenly sounds like it's a whole other person. Same accent, same intonations, same pacing, same emphasis, everything. That's not going to change anytime soon. We are not bodies, but bodies ARE bodies.
For me I am going to just be DIFFERENT, and NOT the same, until I can find a way to transcend the LEVEL of differences and be truly equal in mind and spirit. And I do not expect my body will ever suddenly turn into a rainbow, will not tolerate expectations to fit in with any body-oriented category, and will stick out like a sore thumb until the soreness is healed in my mind.
"The surface traits of God's teachers are not at all alike. They do not look alike to the body's eyes, they come from vastly different backgrounds, their experiences of the world vary greatly, and their superficial "personalities" are quite distinct" UrM5A1
"There is a way of living in the world that is not here, although it seems to be. You do not change appearance, though you smile more frequently, Your forehead is serene; your eyes are quiet. And the ones who walk the world as you do recognize their own. Yet those who have not yet perceived the way will recognize you also, and believe that you are like them as you were before." UrW155L1
"The tendency to invest the physical with non-physical properties. This is essentially magic, and tends more toward anxiety-proneness." UrT1C12
"The body's eyes will continue to see differences, but the mind which has let itself be healed will no longer acknowledge them. There will be those who seem to be "sicker" than others, and the body's eyes will report their changed appearances as before. But the mind will put them all in one category - they are unreal. " UrM9A6
"Yet, in the dreaming, has this been reversed, and separate minds are seen as bodies, which ARE separated, and which cannot JOIN." UrT28D2
"For the body IS a limit on love. The belief in limited love was its origin, and it was MADE to limit the UNlimited. Think not that this is merely allegorical; for it was made to limit YOU. Can you who see yourselves WITHIN a body, know yourself AS AN IDEA? Everything you recognize you identify by EXTERNALS, something OUTSIDE itself. You cannot even think of GOD without a body, or some form you think you recognize. The body cannot KNOW. And while you limit your awareness to its tiny senses, you will not see the grandeur that surrounds you." UrT18I1
"The union of bodies thus becomes the way in which you would KEEP MINDS APART. For bodies cannot forgive. They can do only as the mind directs." UrT15H12
It was only about a year ago that I finally 'came out' as a bisexual person and owned it after 49 years in a dark closet. Since then I've been exploring and expressing and working on more deeply coming to terms with this and living it more - being more visible.
But one aspect that has been nagging in the background is a fear that I will be attacked and judged and hurt by others about this. Largely this is based on an awareness of what people can be like, especially the bigoted angry people, and what's happened to others in brutal attacks and judgement.
I didn't realize for a while that I was taking this position, or playing at being a victim, or that it was even something I needed to do some forgiveness about. But then I became aware of it. So how does one forgive such a thing, where we're at the mercy of the world and afraid of what it might do to us? Safety is a primary concern of everyone and all of us can relate to feeling afraid of being hurt in some way.
I first had to recognize that I was even in a state of "not peace" about it, that I was having worries and thoughts about it, and this was not normal. It's quite easy to just "have" those thoughts and feelings and not even have the awareness to step outside of it or notice that it's a problem or something to even work on. In that mindset, even the idea that there's something wrong can be out of awareness and we just go through the motions of suffering.
Having recognised something is bothering me, I then start to look at it. What's going on here, who is doing what, what is this based on, and am I willing to explore more honestly what's really happening?
As I looked at this I remembered that if I'm immortal I can't really be attacked, so if I believe I'm attackable that's a mistake on my part. That cuts through a lot of crap. Nothing real can be threatened, so I must be believing something faulty if I think people can attack me. That gives some quick relief.
Then I started to notice that I believe other people are going to do something to me, have power over me, hurt me, judge me, attack me, maybe even violence. But then I had to notice, who am I in that scenario, what role am I playing? It becomes clear that I'm seeing myself as a victim, being victimised by others. They're doing something to me, and I'm afraid of it, afraid of being attacked and judged.
When I stayed in the viewpoint that people are going to do something threatening, I couldn't see an option other than to fantasise about how I might try to stand up to them, become angry at them, give them a speech, have to get into a fight, or otherwise keep the belief in being victimised while trying to fend them off. But that was like a closed loop of suffering and the cracks were starting to show.
It's always valuable to remember that nothing in the world is doing anything to me, no-one out there is the cause of me, other people don't cause me or have power over me, and I cannot be affected or changed by anything because I am immortal. So where does that leave the victim role?
I saw that I am positioning myself as a victim for some reason, and setting people up in my mind as attackers to play a role, so that I can get some kind of payoff. And what's that? To have a reason to find them guilty of something. To justify anger on my part or to reinforce defenses. If they were to do anything to me, I would be justified in revenge, and blame, and scapegoating.
So then again this recognition that I'm actually scapegoating comes in. I'm using these people and actually want them to be attacking me, am framing them as attackers, so that I can take the opportunity to have them look like they're the ones sinning, so that I can take advantage of their guilt and shove some of my own guilt in there with it. If they do something to me I can happily project my own guilt onto them, mix it in with their guiltiness, and get rid of it.
In other words, being a victim boils down to wanting to be attacked in order to get a payoff of being able to take advantage of the attacker and project my own guilt onto them. In effect, by becoming the face of innocence, the innocent victim, I can get away with saying "brother at your hand I die", and am willing to suffer and be hurt and die for it, seemingly a small price to pay if it means I can use these attackers to get rid of my guilt.
"Death seems an easy price, if they can say, "Behold me, brother, at your hand I die."
So then this reveals the basic dynamic of projecting and blaming. I first attack myself, I make myself guilty for some reason, I then find someone willing to play the role of attacker/sinner, I bait them and want them to attack me through fantasies of suffering, I hope they'll do it while pretending to be afraid of them doing it, and if they go through with it I'll have a great opportunity to blame them and shove my self-inflicted guilt onto them. Yay.
So there's that. And that has to be unraveled and taken back. Once you see what you're doing it becomes obvious. I fear being attacked for "seeming to be gay" in any way, based on seeming "proof of sin" that this does happen in society, reinforcing a victim role, so that I can hopefully be attacked and get rid of some guilt in the process. So I'm really using these people as scapegoats so that I can benefit.
What I then have to look at or ask is, why am I projecting guilt, and how or why am I making myself guilty in the first place? Are these people really the ones who are denying me, attacking me, judging me, not accepting me, OR ... could it be that I am the one who is attacking me, judging me, not accepting me? Maybe it really is that I am the one who is "not okay with" me being the way that I am, and the fantasies of other people attacking me for it are really the way that I'm using my own mind to attack myself.
The insight from this is that, I really need to more fully own who and what I am (as God created me, transcendent of body/sex roles), allow myself the guiltless freedom, and accept myself, and if I were to do this I would be completely unconcerned with what anyone else might try to do to me.
If I am centered and solid in knowing myself, and fully owning being myself, not only will other people's attempted attacks be correctly viewed as "calls for love" on their part - a way that they attack themselves, but also I'll not take it personally because it won't resonate with an unhealed guilt within myself.
And probably, if I own and am at peace with myself, I will give off peace-vibes, and other people will not feel drawn to attack me for it anyway. Because really an attitude of "I should be punished for this, please attack me" is an energetic and psychological invitation broadcast to everyone if I'm not okay with myself. A temptation asking others to fulfil the role I expect of them.
In effect then, the real issue I/we have is that we are not being entirely true to ourselves, are not fully accepting ourselves, are not granting ourselves absolute freedom, are guilting ourselves and accusing ourselves of sins and shames and guilts, and this puts us into an insecure position. We then seek to problem-solve this in a faulty way by projecting the insecurities onto others, asking them to play roles in which they do to us what we are already doing to ourselves, so that we can pretend not to be doing it to ourselves.
I find and have found then, that my real challenge is the forgiveness of myself, the undoing of my own self-inflicted guilts and shames, and the need for taking full responsibility for who and what I am. If I become fully aligned with and on-the-side-of myself in terms of acceptance and allowing, I won't need to play the victim role or imagine how people would do things to me. And thus I will take away the self-threatening mental activities that were causing fear. When you have no guilt about yourself, nothing anyone does can target you.
Because ultimately we really just are using our own disowned power against ourselves, which turns into a projected indirect form of self-threat, which produces a fear reaction. I was doing this all to myself, and that's what the "secret of salvation" reveals.
Coming to recognize full responsibility for "I have done this to myself" leads to the miracle of healing and to freedom. If you are free to be as you are, then you don't invent or interpret people attacking you for it, and can walk in peace. Personally I still have to work on this some more, it's a work in progress, but at least I can now see the way out by recognising what was the way in. Know Thyself is what 'pride' should be about, and not a victimy disowning and projecting of guilt onto fictional attackers.
"And you will understand that miracles reflect the simple statement, "I have done this thing, and it is this I would undo."
"Only the self-accused condemn."
"I can be attacked by nothing but my thoughts."
"The secret of salvation is but this: That YOU are doing this UNTO YOURSELF. No matter what the form of the attack, this STILL is true. Whoever takes the role of enemy and of attacker, STILL is this the truth. Whatever seems to be the cause of any pain and suffering you feel, this is STILL true. For you would not react at all to figures in a dream you knew that YOU were dreaming. Let them be as hateful and as vicious as they may, they COULD have no effect on you, unless you failed to recognize it is YOUR dream. This single lesson learned will set you free from suffering, WHATEVER form it takes."
"It is your thoughts alone that cause you pain. Nothing external to your mind can hurt or injure you in any way. There is no cause beyond yourself that can reach down and bring oppression. No one but yourself affects you. There is nothing in the world which has the power to make you ill or sad, or weak or frail. But it is you who have the power to dominate all things you see by merely recognizing what you are. As you perceive the harmlessness in them, they will accept your holy will as theirs. And what was seen as fearful now becomes a source of innocence and holiness."