It is just a device with a single, fixed function. It does what it was designed to do, like a machine. It can't be upgraded or changed or transformed into something more spiritual.

Like an old car, the fact is, at some point you have to just admit that the car is old and broken and it's time to let it go. It simply can no longer provide the function that you want it to provide. The ego is the same.

When you realize that the ego is just a fixed device, that means that you know letting it go is the only way to be free of it. You actually have a choice of whether to USE the ego device or not.

The device itself does not have any power over you. It can't stop you. It can only do what it does. It can create the illusions it was designed to create, which you might be convinced by, and that may indeed "stop you", but if you recognize these illusions and see that they are just a part of this ego thing, and not your self, then your self is free to choose again - free to step aside, put the ego device down, and let it go.

The ego can do absolutely nothing about this. It cannot stop you from waking up. It cannot act against your will or against the function it was designed to fulfill. It can only do what the ego was meant to do, and that is to paint a picture which is false and to pretend that it is true. If you no longer have a USE for that, and no longer see any PURPOSE in it, and it is no longer what you WANT, you will just put it down and stop using it.

You are free to choose again. You are free to drop the ego entirely. There is no power in all of existence that can stop you. There is no-one and no alien will capable of preventing you from waking up. The ONLY person or will that seems able to stop you from waking up is YOU, and the only way you can act against yourself in that way is when you choose to keep USING the ego and to keep denying that you have total freedom, total power, total choice, and that you are not in any way a victim of this ego thing.

To admit the truth is to admit that the ego is nothing but something you were using for a purpose. To admit the truth is to admit that your sickness was only put in place by you on purpose to defend you against admitting to your freedom. To admit the truth is to admit your upset and anger and retaliation against the attacks of others was only there to serve the purpose of you getting rid of your belief in sin, which was part of your belief in the ego being real. And to admit the truth is to own up to and accept the fact that, in truth, YOU ARE NOT LIMITED OR BOUND BY ILLUSIONS.

Literally, no-one is keeping you asleep. No-one is stopping you from being with God. No-one is keeping you imprisoned. No-one has power over you. No-one can stop you. There is nothing you cannot do. YOU ARE FREE! To believe otherwise, to be bound by illusions, to be caused to die, to be sick and suffer, to be incapable of performing miracles, to be unable to manipulate any of the ego's illusions, is to continue to USE the ego and to fail to recognize the whole truth of what you are. You are not an illusion but a reality.

You are completely 100% free of the ego if you choose to be so. And then it has absolutely no power over you, this entire world is at your command, and you are immortal.

There's a perspective on the world and upon our minds and beliefs, which is very beautiful. In fact it's quite divine. It's the perspective that God and the Angels would have of what we seem to think is happening here.

From their viewpoint of love and joy and compassion, they know that the entire ego thought system is nothing but a simply mistake. Every belief in sin is just someone being confused. Every seeming attack is nonsense that's not really happening.

And they know that those who believe in the nightmare, are akin to those who have lost their minds. That we're simply somewhat insane and are having wild hallucinations, being very confused about what is true and false, very uncertain about what is real or unreal.

They know that nothing about the separation or the entire world is true or real at all. They know that we're just literally having a nightmare, a bad dream where we're imagining all kinds of horrible stuff. And in this dream we seem to think that we're sinners and evil monsters who deserve to suffer and be sick and die.

And they know that this isn't true. They know that we don't deserve any of that. They know our real selves, and they know that in awakening we'd realize it to. That we are the beautiful angelic shining eternal beings of love and light that could never sin or suffer in any way. They hold that view of us because it is the truth about our real selves.

So as they come to our aid as our mighty companions and helpers, including the Holy Spirit and Jesus, they have this perspective that we're simply mistaken. We're just confused and lost and afraid and are scaring ourselves with imaginary monsters and strange dark threats which aren't even real. That we're just having a strange crazy dream and making up all kinds of things which aren't true.

They see us as just temporarily mentally ill. As having temporary insanity. They have the utmost total compassion for us because they completely recognize that all of our nightmares and screams are simply calls for help, asking for love and to be saved.

No matter how much it seems we might be wanting death and destruction they still discern clearly that in the midst of that belief is a sense of horror and fear and of not wanting what is happening. They recognize everyone's calling as a call for love and a cry in the wilderness. And God has answered.

The whole world is just one big psych ward. One big psychiatric hospital. Where all the patients and even the people caring for the patients and even the people who seem to have nothing to do with patients at all, are all patients. It's a crazy world filled with crazy insane people, and very little sanity.

God knows that. The angels know it. They love us and wait for us until we're willing to accept the truth. They keep guiding us, healing us, steering us to the truth, back to awareness of being home. And we will all return to that eventually. It's guaranteed. Because God is love and He loves His children, and has guaranteed their safe return.

"Sin is insanity. It is the means by which the mind is driven mad, and seeks to let illusions take the place of truth. And being mad, it sees illusions where truth should be, and where it really is. Sin gave the body eyes, for what is there the sinless would behold? What need have they of sights or sounds or touch? What would they hear or reach to grasp? What would they sense at all? To sense is not to know. And truth can be but filled with knowledge, and with nothing else. ... The body is the instrument the mind made in its striving to deceive itself. "

"Sin is the home of all illusions, which but stand for things imagined, issuing from thoughts which are untrue. They are the "proof " that what has no reality is real. Sin "proves" God's Son is evil; timelessness must have an end; Eternal life must die. And God Himself has lost the Son He loves, with but corruption to complete Himself, His Will forever overcome by death, love slain by hate, and peace to be no more."

"A madman's dreams are frightening, and sin appears indeed to terrify. And yet what sin perceives is but a childish game. The Son of God may play he has become a body, prey to evil and to guilt, with but a little life that ends in death. But all the while his Father shines on him, and loves him with an everlasting Love which his pretenses cannot change at all."

"How long, oh Son of God, will you maintain the game of sin? Shall we not pull away these sharp-edged children's toys? How soon will you be ready to come home? Perhaps today? There is no sin. Creation is unchanged. Would you still hold return to Heaven back? How long, oh holy Son of God, how long?"

Over the weekend I came down with what seems to be 'a cold'. Actually it is more likely just a strong 'release', and I find that pretty much every time I have a 'cold' it is accompanied by strong emotional releases.

So anyway.. I was semi-miserable. Suffering a bit.

I wanted to know if any kind of healing was possible, and Holy Spirit hinted that we'd talk about it at night ie before sleeping.

So that time came along and I remembered. And I was also feeling fairly willing to just 'accept' being sick for a while. I thought to myself, well, I made this sickness, so I should actually honor and respect the power that I've wielded and appreciate what I've created. I mean, after all, it's a pretty nice illusion I made, and Jesus does warn in the ACIM text about it being an error to underestimate the power of what we made with the ego. I didn't want to fight with it or attack it. I was trying to be more accepting. I did a little bit of "I love this sickness" and then I asked Holy Spirit:

"Holy Spirit, is there any way at all that there can be a healing of this, or do I have to just accept it for the next 2 weeks of snot and tissues?"

HS: "There is"

So I said, "Ok, I'm willing to admit I don't know anything about healing, I don't know how to heal this, I don't know why I made it or what its purpose is, I don't know why I have it and I don't know what to do about it. Help me to know what I need to 'do' if anything to help you to facilitate healing." And in this, I seemed to be unusually 'open minded' and receptive instead of just going on about what 'I have to do' to fix this. Holy Spirit said:

"Receive God"

I was like, WHAT?! It seemed I was here asking about how to fix this sickness and instead I get an answer that tells me I'm about to be loved?? So I was, like, ok... I let myself just 'receive God' ... like, without doing anything other than receiving and maybe repeating to myself, "receive God".

Immediately I felt a sense of love descend and come into me and it went deeper than a sense of unlove and unworthiness that was in me that I didn't realize was there. And I started to cry because it was beautiful and a relief. And the ego part of me was somewhat in shock because I couldn't figure out WHY God would love me. I had all kinds of ego reactions around it like, why would God love me, I've never been loved, surely I'm not lovable, etc.

Nevertheless, my body started to shake, my hands shook vigorously, I coughed and spewed a bit as I felt something being ejected from me and lifted out. Then I cried a bit more because I could feel how this love was given so FREELY, like, there were absolutely no strings attached, and it wasn't asking that I give anything whatsoever, and was totally unconditional. I couldn't comprehend how or why it was being given so free of any expectations or conditions or requirements, like 'a freebie'. Why would God just give give give? How was it possible that I would be just given to like that?!

Anyway... I felt this healing tremendously helped to lift away a sense of unlove and unworthiness and, in particuarly, a sense that God/Father loved me, which apparently was at the root of my sickness. I felt a lot better. It wasn't all gone, but much improved. I couldn't help but feel grateful, and somewhat in awe, and a bit shocked. I actually felt a slight sense of ... how dare you love me this much without asking for anything in return. It was shockingly unconditional. God loved me MORE than I loved me.

This is then when ego came in and tried in various subtle ways to reproduce or trigger or influence this 'receiving God' thing... like it kept trying to pretend that IT was causing the transmission of love, or IT was able to control it, or IT was going to trigger it off, or IT knew what made the healing flow. And yet it didn't. I noticed all that activity and how it was interfering. And it wasn't until I could stop all of those efforts to "be the healer" that I allowed myself to "receive God" a bit more. Genuinely. To just receive in openness and willingness without trying to force it. Because to receive without 'doing' anything disables the ego from all its activities.

So grateful. And so unexpected.... I had no idea that I was going to receive healing AND be unconditionally loved, like, without having to do or give anything in return, anything other than to just be open and willing to receive. It seemed like such a blessing that really exposed any sense of unworthiness or reasons why I shouldn't.

I asked also then, if it were possible to heal another person this way. Holy Spirit said that the other person has to be "ready to accept willingly". I could understand and accept that. You can't force healing on someone. And I only felt a healing because I was WILLING TO RECEIVE. And it was not anything that *I* did whatsoever. Other people can receive healing from God too, but they have to be willing to accept and allow it. And it has to be pure 100% receiving, not any effort to control or interfere or even to 'give'. I can see how the ego tries to pretend it is seeking healing by trying to force healing or produce it from its own efforts, but real healing is completely counter-ego, requiring the ego to be suspended and uninvolved.

"Receive God". Simple.

I am amazed mostly at how God gives love so freely, so without conditions, so totally and unrestrained. It's like a huge outpouring, a massive giving, almost like a revelation. Everything coming FROM God to you, and your only job is to RECEIVE. Receive receive receive.

It's like sunbathing - God-bathing...you don't go trying to force the sun to shine with your ego, you don't trigger the sun, you don't make it shine on you. You have to surrender and relax and let go and receive the light. The sun does the shining. God does the shining. Difficult to get the ego out of the way and be totally receptive. But it seems like the more I can 'let love in' the more I am allowing myself to be loved, to a depth and extent that I have never experienced or thought possible.

Ahhhhhhh.

Still sniffling today. The 'cold' is still there. But... I know I am healed in some way on some level. A sense of unworthiness has been replaced with worthiness. Thanks God.

One last insight. .. the lesson I needed to learn, in Holy Spirit's words:

"Let God"

"Atonement is for all, because it is the way to UNDO the belief that ANYTHING is for you ALONE." UrT9C1

"The Atonement is a lesson in sharing, which is given you because YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW TO DO IT." UrT9C3

"But the Holy Spirit teaches you that if you look only at yourself you CANNOT find yourself because that is NOT what you are." UrT8D6

When you are being an ego, you believe you are a separate body. You suffer. And then you think that in order to improve yourself, you will work on improving YOU, and NOT others.

You think of yourself as isolated in a box, separated off, not sharing. And then you think that if you work on "yourself", you will be able to rise up to a high level, accept atonement for "yourself", and then be done. And it won't matter that everyone else has not chosen to do the same, because they're none of your business.

We could go about practicing the entire ACIM principles but still staying within the confines of the "I am a separate person" box. Improving me, awakening me, me becoming more loving, me undoing my own guilt, etc. This is all selfish of course and part of the ego identity.

What ACIM is ACTUALLY teaching, is something quite radical. That we are all part of a collective mind, sort of a collective hive mind of consciousness. And that means we are all one, and other people are a part of ourselves. Literally we are in them and they are in us. Our souls are fused together. EVERYONE CONTAINS EVERYTHING.

This is massively different. Because now it means that in order to come OUT of the prison of the ego and the body, you cannot just treat it like it's something that applies "only to you." You can't just "work on yourself" in isolation. It's not a "self study". It's not even POSSIBLE for you to approach awakening while still retaining a sense of "I am only myself, and other people are not me."

What we should be doing is recognising that at the higher level, the golden rule is kicking in, we are SHARING EVERYTHING with everyone, we are part of the whole sonship, and our mind is SHARED with other people's minds. Our souls, our identity in Christ, it is all SHARED. We are NOT just ourselves, we are many people.

"One brother is all brothers. Every mind contains all minds, for every mind is one. Such is the truth." UrW161L4

This is a holographic relationship. One whole (God), with many parts (beings), in which every part contains the whole (oneness among brothers), and there is ultimately only one whole (God) yet it has many wholes (sons of God) within it, which are collectively the shared one son/christ/heaven.

So if you are to make headway out of physicality, away from the body and the ego, any kind of progress in spiritual awakening, it can't be with the starting ego mindset of "I am a separate person", and you cannot KEEP that mindset if you want to awaken. It's not true of you. You are not ONLY yourself, you INCLUDE others. You are waking up FROM a sense of exclusion and selfish isolation, TO communion with everyone.

So if you want to apply something where you're like, I am holy and innocent and guiltless and sinless.... you can't really be regarding that as applying ONLY to you. It has to be more like, WE are BOTH innocent and guiltless and sinless. We are ALL innocent and guiltless and sinless. Because you ARE the sonship.

This reveals the extension of this that.... you have to INCLUDE your brothers in your own awakening, your own healing, your own giving and receiving. This is what makes you a teacher of God - shared interests. Other people are part of your self. You have to be willing to give love to the part of you that is in them, in order to receive it.

This is why, per the golden rule, what you do unto others you ARE DOING unto yourself. This is why you have to look for the GOOD in other people, in order to FIND it within yourself. Because you are not just you. This is why your BROTHER becomes your savior, because essentially there is part of YOU in your brother. If you want to see yourself as Christ or soul, you have to see the Christ/soul in the other person AS WELL. You are BOTH that.

Whatever applies to them applies to you, because you are equals. That means whatever you are trying to give to yourself - do for yourself - apply to yourself - you have to get out of that mindset and instead apply it to EVERYONE EQUALLY. You can't find your "self", or even your soul, by focusing ONLY on your own self/soul exclusively. You can't tap into "just my higher self", it has to be that you're tapping into the entire Kingdom of God.

You have to give to others what you want to receive for yourself. Which means you have to give love to other people in order to simultaneously give it to yourself. Giving and receiving are one.

The ego's law is one of inequality in which what applies to you does not apply to anyone else. Where you are separated off in isolation in a prison all alone. And to focus on accepting atonement "for yourself alone" is completely contradictory to how things really are. The golden rule, which is an unbreakable law of God, says that whatever is true of you is true of everyone. So either you BOTH are innocent, or you BOTH are guilty, but never can you be DIFFERENT or have something special that applies only to you and not them.

So our whole practice of applying spiritual principles "to ourselves", "for ourselves", HAS to start to OPEN UP and INCLUDE other people. It has to be about SHARING. Because heaven's law is all based on sharing. Everyone in heaven shares everything equally and fully. So I should be saying, WE are innocent, we are BOTH innocent, we are BOTH sinless, we are BOTH guiltless. This erases the SEPARATION BETWEEN us.

It's the separation that needs undoing, not some personal issue that hides in a separate box. If all you do is "fix only yourself", you are NOT undoing the separation BETWEEN you and the others, or between you and the part of you that is in them. And so that will put a ceiling on how much 'you' can wake up, because by not including others you are maintaining the separation and keeping it going, which limits you. You cannot go ALL the way without including everyone.

It is therefore ONLY through communication, shared minds, joined minds and hearts, union, holy relationship, true oneness, that the separation is actually undone. It's not enough to "work on yourself". You have to be open to working "on the sonship". You are working to help heal THE WHOLE, not just your selfish self. To accept atonement for yourself ACTUALLY means that you INCLUDE EVERYONE in "the truth that applies to all", in which you accept what is TRUE OF EVERYONE, not just yourself. Otherwise we're just staying selfish little separate people.

"The Miracle unites Souls directly with each other." UrT1B24K

"When two minds join as one, and share one idea equally, the first link in the awareness of the Sonship as one has been made." UrT16C4

"Healing is an act of thought by which two minds perceive their oneness, and become glad. This gladness calls to every part of the Sonship to rejoice with them, and let God Himself go out into them and through them." UrT5B1

As I recently have been undoing my own belief in my own sinfulness, which is also the general belief that sin is real, I've been coming up against challenges. I had several days of some pretty heavy "release" which was overwhelming.

Holy Spirit was glad that I could realize I was only releasing because I had been willing to let go of some old belief in my sinfulness/guilt, but also advised that I should be gentle and slow down a bit. Trying too hard to undo all of it so quickly.

A major cornerstone of what was releasing, was the feeling and belief of not being lovable by God, because of sin and guilt that I still think is true of me. So I was trying to dig all of that out. Even though that's worthwhile and helpful, in the big picture, we do have to pace ourselves a bit.

What came after this release, though, was a feeling of self-love the likes of which I have never felt before. For about half a day I just felt really soft and loving toward myself and others. This proves to me that this undoing of beliefs is very worth pursuing.

I've also noticed, as I "push" myself or challenge myself to question ... do I REALLY believe I am sinless? ... it is pushing into my awareness various beliefs that I have that I'm going to have to look at. Here are some of the strong ones which have been coming up for me lately, and these might be the same for you. I think these beliefs are strong because they have a lot of social support and emphasis. Beliefs like:

Cancer

Evil

Death

Unworthiness

Being attacked

Loss of a loved one

etc...

I've quite often heard the word "cancer" come up from my ego, at stupid times, and I know it's a false belief but it still comes up driven entirely by fear. And it comes up because I still believe in it. There has been so much attention given to cancer, making it seem REAL, making it out to be a huge dangerous threat, an enemy, that everyone is trying to avoid and attack etc. That has seeped into and formed a belief in me - my own doing really, but I've created this belief that it has truth and reality to it. So now that shows me that I have the job of undoing my belief that cancer has ANY reality to it whatsoever.

Similarly, I have started to come up against questioning whether "evil" is real. I found myself for a few days getting lost again in trying to figure out what evil IS, how it operates, WHY it is doing what it appears to be doing etc. I've had some experiences that involve "evil spirits", if you can call them that. They're not friendly. I cast one out of me a few months ago kind of by accident when Jesus was helping me with a healing. I felt it leave. And I've had other encounters.

In the illusory dream world they "seem" to exist, and putting any amount of attention on them may attract them. But also, fearing them is just as bad. The "fear that evil is real" is a quite fundemanal ego belief. As a belief that "evil is real" it must produce fear, which is the suggestion you don't want it but the belief in it is a choice to want it. You become scared because of your OWN belief in it being real, which sort of pushes you into a confrontation with the thing you want to get away from.

Ultimately these things are illusions and love has no opposite. Jesus told me that they are "just fear". Just as this whole world is based on fear. And fearing it is not helpful. We have to be firm in Christ and in truth. Belief in sin being real produces the conditions for the ego to attack in all its ways, not just through hellish beings. We are not meant to fear these things or try to get into trying to understand or explain them too much, because it's really easy to get lost in that.

I found myself getting lost in the attempt to figure out what and how and why these things exist, only to find myself feeling more afraid and to be in a stronger mode of "questioning". Being in a mode of questioning is not a mode of answers OR answer-finding. Jesus's instruction to me again was "decide", which I've come to learn means I am not a victim and have the power to choose, and if I choose to believe that these things are not real and that they have no effect on me, then THAT WILL BE my experience. If I choose to believe in them, I will experience them as such. I get to decide. If I am in indecision, I'm actually unconsciously choosing to believe evil is real.

So I think we have these quite basic, quite strong beliefs we have to unearth and sort out. There is nothing about evil that is other than just another description of the ego. And the Holy Spirit knows that the ego does not really exist. That needs to become our belief also, and then we will be in celebration and joy and safety and fearlessness, knowing this truth. The truth shall set you free of evil because there IS no real evil. Evil is just as much an illusion as everything else the ego made.

It's a bit of a challenge though... confronting these beliefs and being in that place of "uncertainty" about whether it MIGHT be true and real. The sense of threat that comes from actually really considering it to be a real possibility. And then feeling unsure whether to believe it is real or not. That just means we're trusting the ego too much and are choosing to make it real. We just need to keep chipping away at these beliefs and keep undoing them to get to the point where we can truly accept the Atonement fully and recognize illusions for what they are.

Maybe it's your hair, the shape of your face, or some other body part. Maybe it's how you speak. Maybe it's the way you walk or where you came from.

In one way or another, you probably walk around with layer upon layer of not being what someone somewhere thinks you should be.

You might think you are dysfunctional, or broken, or defective, or incapable, or somehow just fundamentally flawed. People might treat you like you're disabled, less than them, or inferior.

The problem isn't so much that other people are constantly bombarding you with these judgements, but that you've accepted them for yourself as though they are true of you. You believe in them and make them your identity, even if it hurts.

But this also means you have the choice, whether to let go of this false sense of worth and identity, or whether to hold on a while longer.

What if these views that you have of yourself are not really true about you? What if there's really nothing wrong with you at all? What if everyone has been mistaken about you, but even moreso, you've been mistaken about yourself?

What if you're still just as worthy and valuable to God as you always have been, and you just forgot for a while, thinking you were no longer acceptable?

Love loves you unconditionally forever and ever and ever. You are worthy of God's love, right now. You don't have to earn it. It's being offered unconditionally and freely without any strings attached.

Let yourself be loved.

If you believe in sickness, just in general, you will become sick. But that's not the end of it. You'll believe other people are sick too, even if they aren't. And that means that your belief in sickness attempts to MAKE other people sick.

If you believe in attack, just in general, you will believe you are attacking. But that's not the end of it. You'll believe everyone else is attacking too. And you'll believe they're just as justified in attacking as you believe you are. Your belief in attack attacks other people by portraying them as wanting to attack you.

If you believe in guilt, just in general, you will believe you are guilty. But that's not the end of it. You'll believe that everyone is also guilty. You will perhaps think only they are guilty and not you, but you can't believe that this applies to them without it applying to you also. Your believe in your own guilt is an attempt to make others guilty also.

It happens this way because we all share One mind and One identity. What applies to any part of the "Sonship" applies to every single part of it equally. This is a whole different way of looking at rules than the ego uses. Either we are all guilty, or we are all innocent. Either everyone is to blame, or nobody is to blame. Either everyone is attacking, or nobody is attacking. There is no separating out of different people having different rules or evaluations that apply to them, separate from you.

The ego is different in that it applies SEPARATION, between you and others, creating an illusion that what applies to them does not apply to you because it's different. So now they are attacking, but you're not. Or they're guilty but you're not. Or they're sick but you're not. Or you're sick but its not attacking them. Or that your guilt is in isolation. Or that you're only attacking yourself. This is the ego's thought system of division, keeping you separate from others.

If you're in this kind of thinking - that what applies to you doesn't apply to others and vice versa, then you are definitely in the ego's mindset.

Looking at what's true in the SHARED Holy Spirit mindset will help you to get out of it. If I think someone else is guilty but I'm not, I have to admit, I believe in guilt and I must believe *I* am guilty in order to accuse them of my own sin. So I have to own up to that and take responsibility for believing I am guilty... and get that corrected. It's not true. I'm innocent, AND SO ARE THEY. This is you returning to the sonship as a whole.

For a while now I've been experiencing the Holy Spirit working in me quite actively to clear and heal my mind, emotions and body. And I've been unsure how this correlates with A Course in Miracles because I don't hear hardly anyone talking about having interactions with Holy Spirit that involve any kind of manifest 'activities'.

Indeed many people still think Holy Spirit is just some kind of metaphor or inaccessible state of mind. Much of the ACIM community has a very cerebral, nervous, intellectual relationship with Holy Spirit, if at all. So I've been reluctant to share about it thinking myself to be doing something 'weird'. But maybe I am pioneering.

For me, this seemed to begin quite naturally as the next step in my exploration of trusting Him. I think that some day when I lay down to sleep I just had this idea to ask Holy Spirit to help me in some way, or to heal whatever I was feeling, and it was part of me opening up to exploring whether He would take some steps on my behalf.

Previously I think that I believed and acted as though my forgiveness process was something that I would do on my own and that any 'progress' or 'results' from it were due to my own willingness to see differently. But this then shifted, because after a certain point, after enough surrender and willingness and development of trust, I started to get this sense that Holy Spirit was meant to do more than just be an onlooker or advisor.

The first few times this happened I felt what I would probably describe as an 'energy' or a sensation of energy moving, through what seemed to be my body. It was sometimes accompanied by little jerks or motions in my hands or feet. Sometimes some subtle contractions of muscles. But over time, this has greatly increased.

I started then to learn to simply 'invite Him in' or to ask Him to come into me or to join with me. I didn't know if this was 'proper' or allowed or normal or anything but I was willing to explore it. I would invite Him in. He would quite often then say to me, "relax" or "surrender". And it seemed in a way that this was either a 'condition' or a prerequisite for supporting this thing happening. So I'd do some surrendering and relax my body physically. And then stuff would start to happen.

I will sincerely invite Him into me and then I will relax and allow and I will start to feel 'energy' move, whatever that is. Manifestations of the Holy Spirit. Sometimes this takes a pattern where it starts at my feet then works its way up my legs. As it goes, these limbs become more tensed as though sort of 'electrified'. Holy Spirit's energy is like electricity in a way, or how you might imagine someone if they were being electrocuted... but in a non-harmful non-painful way. Often my legs all the way up into my hips and pelvis will 'energize' and tense, seeming to form a certain specific 'posture' which, once established, immediately begins to 'drain' energy out of my upper torso, particularly any negative emotions or upset energies. These just flow down and out through my root chakra or feet like someone is flushing the toilet.

Then after a while this electricity will come up through my upper torso and into my arms and chest there can be at times some quite vigorous shaking, tensing and pulsing of stomache muscles, and various energetic changes taking place. When it works its way up to my shoulders and head area, I quite often now will experience what I can only describe as a very rapid intense oscillation/vibration of my head, which will suddenly shake at a very fast rate, as though something is being dislodged and removed upward. After this process is basically done I will be 'buzzing' somewhat and yet usually feeling quite peaceful and relieved, especially if upset emotions were healed in the process.

Now, not only does this happen for me on almost a daily basis now, but also it is becoming much easier for me to 'access' this electrical energy - in other words, to work with Holy Spirit 'supernaturally' in me, by just my mere willingness to allow Him to do something. And I'm finding that this is making it possible to apply this to any particular seeming condition that's going on in my body. For example I might have stuffy sinuses from eating some icecream, and if I'm willing I will sort of give a brief 'nod' to Holy Spirit, and he will instantly start to shake something and energize something and extract all of the symptoms. Or lets say I am under slept and I turn to Holy Spirit and he 'zaps' me, lol, I do my little shaky thing, and then I'm not longer experiencing that tiredness.

Also this is manifesting in the healing of others now, where I have an increasingly spontaneous willingness to lay my hand on a person and allow Holy Spirit to be immediately engaged through me to heal something. This has been developed somewhat through my openness to explore supernatural healing and commanding away sickness and so on. By developing some trust in that area, I am now growing in 'strength' and confidence in that if I simply do my part and join with Holy Spirit, miracles can happen, without any preparation whatsoever. God doesn't need preparation. God is ready to heal right now!

In particular, I've also been inviting Jesus into me, and I ask him to come in and heal certain feelings I feel in my torso. And immediately he comes in and makes corrections, which I may experience as tightening of muscles or pulses in the stomache area or contractions and other shaking, and then somehow these negative feelings will have simply disappeared without me really noticing how or when, and I will feel happy and start to laugh. And so I've been exploring that more too. What is the next step?

Well, I've also more actively started to invite GOD to come into me, to be in me, to dwell in me, to shine through me, to love through me. God is the one whose presence regularly moves me to tears. Realizing that God is HERE right now, and that it's really me that believes in separation or unawareness of God's PRESENCE. So as I open up to accepting and being aware of and open to God's presence here, I have to open to God being inside of me also, in my 'body' and mind. And so I invited God to be in me.

Then instead of referring to Holy Spirit as Holy Spirit, I referred to Him as 'Spirit of God', to make that kind of 'connection' between the two, which maybe I wasn't making before. So I invited 'spirit of God' to come into me, while also affirming "I receive God's healing". And let me tell you, the amount of activity that Holy Spirit them did in me was probably the most intense I've ever experienced. All up my spine I felt this intense presence and electrical energy radiating out of both sides of my spine all the way up and down several inches, accompanied but much more intense body-part shaking and energy dislodging. You have to really try to just trust and allow and relax while He's shaking the crap out of your body, literally. And afterwards, I felt healed and renewed and peaceful.

And I can tell you one other thing that I am noticing, is that... because of these 'sessions' of healing, I think... I'm noticing more often now moments where I just feel... calm, present, and there aren't any thoughts happening. It's quite unusual and unlike any other 'mode' of functioning that I am used to. Like, as if I am ALWAYS thinking, and then... there isn't any thinking happening, and I'm like... what is this? It's a feeling like there is this 'love' present, and it's just very calming and relaxing. And I've remarked to myself, that this is like the 'first time' that I am 'being', aware, without having any thoughts about anything. Also last night I was doing this and also experimenting with 'not controlling anything' and I heard myself exclaim, "this is the first time I am actually finally RESTING." To be aware, relaxed, and to have no sense of having to do do do do do anything, and just BEING there. Ahhhhh. Felt like real rest and relief. Relief from the ego mind. For the first time ever!

So what's on my mind now is... the interesting transition from ... doing forgiveness mentally, taking steps in changing perception....following some procedure (which still helps)... versus.... starting to be transformed SUPER-NATURALLY, by Holy Spirit directly. I used to not really ask Holy Spirit to 'do' the healing in me, thinking that I just needed to change my perception and accept my innocence etc, and that Holy Spirit was just sort of looking on from above and guiding me with word phrases and so on.

But then I came to realize, particularly spurred by some other people who ask Holy Spirit to actually do something, that Holy Spirit is not only meant to do something but to actually supernaturally HEAL me. And not just a little bit. I completely saw one passage of ACIM in a different light when it says "Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision IF I will LET HIM" - and "I choose to LET HIM, by allowing Him to choose for God for me". This for me has become, to let Him choose for God, to decide my innocence, AND THEN TO COME INTO ME AND PERFORM HEALING MIRACLES - which quite *literally* remove the consequences of my wrong decision - literally the healing and removal of upset emotions, the correction of body sickness, all of it! And this all entirely hinges around "If I will LET HIM." He isn't the one who lacks an ability to heal EVERYTHING... we are the ones who won't conceive of, allow or open up to letting Him wield his unlimited POWER in our lives.

I have a little willingness, then he does some super amazing - I have no idea what He really does - THING - and then I am better off. Yes I continue to do forgiveness in a more formal sort of sequence of perceptual corrections, but I am opening up more now to, what Holy Spirit just told me... "direct transfer", of experiential truth - the healing power of love - the presence of the One Mind - to accept and receive God's healing directly and to then extend it, rather than this whole ACIM thing of some kind of monotonous, intellectual, do-it-yourself 'study' of a book or manipulation of thoughts or thinking that YOU do the healing and correction. YOU do not heal. God is the healer. God has appointed Holy Spirit to HEAL YOU, FOR YOU. So this requires you to let go of even the process of your own forgiveness, to LET HIM actively work in you and through you. Otherwise you are just staying separate and missing out on a HUGE amount of support and divine help in your process of awakening. You don't have to do this all yourself, and in fact you HAVE to relinquish doing it yourself in order to open up to accepting and allowing God's love!

I'm sharing this because I feel more confident over time that regardless of what I am experiencing, it is real enough to me and transformative enough to me, that I think other people are supposed to know more about this. There isn't enough of an awareness of the Power of Holy Spirit in the ACIM community, especially not in terms of performing miracles and other super-natural manifestations. Some branches of religion are much more familiar with this than most of us are. But I said to Holy Spirit, I don't know how I could possibly 'teach this' to anyone, because it's not like it's based on some kind of metaphysics or logic or whatever. I have no idea what Holy Spirit actually does or how He does it. It's much more of an experience that I sort of stumbled into.

Then Holy Spirit simply said, and this is His instruction to YOU:

"Invite me in."

"Enlightenment is but a recognition, not a change at all." UrW188L1

Enlightenment is merely you recognizing "the facts" and recognizing that they are true. And accepting them, because they are so obvious. No more confusion or deception or lies, just reality. How are things really, what exists, what are you really?

"no-one can be angry at a fact" UrM18A4

Just the facts. What is true. What is real. What is actual.

Where are you, what are you, what exists, what doesn't. Just you recognizing it, seeing it, realising it.

There's no attack upon the ego or the world in this because they are recognised as not existing, nothing you really have to do to deal with them, and it's very simple. When they're seen for the nothingness they are they are just nothing to you.

You just acknowledge how things really are. That's all.

Everything is in its proper perspective and place. You see clearly that there is no world. That you are squarely in God, only the kingdom exists, and you are immortal.

"Others find it in experience that is not of this world, which shows them that the world does not exist because what they behold must be the truth, and yet it clearly contradicts the world." UrW132L7

It's like, you finally get a look at what you actually are without any clothes or disguises or denial. Just a good hard look at the truth of you. You know yourself as you really are.

The truth is that only God and his creation exists, of which you are a part, and nothing unreal exists. If you could just purely recognize that fact you'd be enlightened.

It's like just sort of seeing "what is". No more deception, confusion, delusion, wishful thinking, denial, trying to convince yourself of lies, trying to turn yourself into something you're not etc.

If you could go to reality right now and take a look in the light as to what is true - what's really there, you'd just see that there's God and his kingdom - your brothers, you and your creations, angels etc. ... this all exists, its what you are ... and .. .there is no spacetime. The world is recognised as totally false, unreal, untrue, nothing.

So you're done. Just looking at the simple facts. Acceptance of reality, recognition of the truth. Not some conceptual truth - factual experienced truth. What is. What is not.

Not much different than when you go somewhere to visit some people and you arrive and they're there and you're there and the place is there and that's all there is to it.

Enlightenment is just you coming home to live in God in total honesty and willingness and acceptance.

ACIM says of healing: "Forgiveness is not real unless it brings a healing to your brother and yourself. You must attest his sins have no effect on you to demonstrate they are not real. How else could he be guiltless? And how could his innocence be justified unless his sins have no effect to warrant guilt? Sins are beyond forgiveness just because they would entail effects that cannot be undone and overlooked entirely. In their undoing lies the proof that they are merely errors. Let yourself be healed that you may be forgiving, offering salvation to your brother and yourself."

What this is saying is that when you fully believe the truth, that you are not a victim, that forgiveness has been performed, and that atonement has been claimed, there MUST be a DEMONSTRATION OF HEALING, in both yourself and your brother, to SHOW that what seemed to happen in sin has had NO REAL EFFECT.

This correlates with a part in the bible which says that signs must follow those who believe, meaning, supernatural manifestations of truth must be exhibited as proof that what you believe is true. Not just a belief intellectually, but a DEMONSTRATION.

"You must attest his sins have no effect on you to demonstrate they are not real."

If your brother does something to you and it has an effect on you, this proves his guilt. Jesus is asking us to prove his innocence, by not allowing such effects to be shown.

And just think about this:

"Forgiveness is not real unless it brings a healing to your brother and yourself."