Whatever you believe is true, you are constantly teaching. Teaching is demonstration.

If you believe sickness and sin are real, you will demonstrate them by showing them in your body.

If you do not believe sickness and sin are real, the body will no longer be used to demonstrate a contradictory belief, and will be restored to health.

If you believe that God's truth is true, then you will not believe in sickness and death, and you will demonstrate this by proving that there are no causes outside of you, and therefore you, *symbolized by* your body, have not suffered any effects of separation.

Otherwise if the body remains sick, it is demonstrating and teaching to others that the Son of God can be sick, and that healing has not fully occurred. Sickness also demonstrates to others that they are guilty for causing the sickness, which is hardly an enlightened teaching.

This is why it is not enough just to convince yourself that you believe in God's truth, in some detached intellectual way. You must LIVE IT. You must demonstrate it and show it, in order to teach your brother that He is innocent, BECAUSE He cannot do anything to cause sickness in your body due to your mind's correctness.

You are supposed to be the "living proof" of miracles!

A collection of related quotes where the physical is no longer seen...

"By focusing upon the good in him, THE BODY GROWS DECREASINGLY PERSISTENT IN YOUR SIGHT, and will at length be SEEN AS LITTLE MORE THAN JUST A SHADOW CIRCLING AROUND THE GOOD. 4 And this will be your concept of yourself, when you have reached the world BEYOND THE SIGHT YOUR EYES ALONG CAN OFFER YOU TO SEE. 5 For you will not interpret what you see without the Aid that God has given you. 6 And in His sight THERE IS ANOTHER WORLD."

"The veil across the face of Christ, the fear of God and of salvation, and the love of guilt and death, they all are different names for just one error; that there is a space between you and your brother, kept apart by an illusion of yourself that holds him off from you, and you away from him."

"And so you and your brother stand, here in this holy place, BEFORE THE VEIL OF SIN that hangs between you and the face of Christ. 2 Let it be lifted!"

"The fourth obstacle to be surmounted hangs like a heavy veil before the face of Christ. 2 Yet as His face rises beyond it, shining with joy because He is in His Father's Love, peace will lightly brush the veil aside and run to meet Him, and to join with Him at last."

"Let not your eyes be blinded by the veil of specialness that hides the face of Christ from him, and you as well."

"The veil of ignorance is drawn across the evil and the good, and must be passed that BOTH MAY DISAPPEAR, so that perception finds no hiding place"

"Your CHOSEN HOME is on THE OTHER SIDE, BEYOND THE VEIL. 2 It has been carefully prepared for you, and it is ready to receive you now. "

"Only the veil that has been drawn across reality is lifted. 3 Nothing has changed."

"But true perception looks on it as nothing more than just a FRAGILE VEIL, so EASILY DISPELLED that it can last no longer than an instant."

"Forgiveness lets the veil be lifted up that hides the face of Christ from those who look with unforgiving eyes upon the world."

"The veil that you have drawn across the face of love has DISAPPEARED."

"The veil is lifted through its gentleness, and nothing hides the face of Christ from its beholders."

"Never allow purity to remain hidden, but shine away the heavy veils of guilt within which the Son of God has hidden himself from his own sight."

"(sin) THE BODY'S EYES BEHOLD IT AS SOLID GRANITE, so thick it would be madness to attempt to pass it. 5 Yet reason SEES THROUGH IT easily, because it is an error. 6 The form it takes cannot conceal its EMPTINESS from reason's eyes."

"Reason will tell you that if form is not reality it MUST BE AN ILLUSION, and IS NOT THERE to see. 5 And if you see it you must be mistaken, for you are seeing what CAN NOT BE REAL as if it were."

"Let not the vision of his holiness, the sight of which would show you your forgiveness, be kept from you by what the body's eyes can see. 3 Let your awareness of your brother not be blocked by your perception of his sins AND OF HIS BODY."

"You SEE THE FLESH or recognize the spirit. 2 There is no compromise between the two. 3 If one is real the other MUST be false, for what is real denies its opposite. 4 There is no choice in vision but this one."

"If you choose FLESH, you never will escape the BODY as your own reality, for you have chosen that you want it so. 8 But choose the spirit, and all Heaven bends to touch your eyes and bless your holy sight, that you may SEE THE WORLD OF FLESH NO MORE *except* to heal and comfort and to bless."

"In Christ's sight, the world and God's creation meet, and as they come together ALL PERCEPTION DISAPPEARS." (world is not creation)

"The real beauty of the temple cannot be seen with the PHYSICAL EYE. 11 Spiritual sight, on the other hand, cannot see the structure at all because it is perfect vision. 12 It can, however, see the altar with perfect clarity."

"This ultimately reawakens spiritual vision, simultaneously WEAKENING THE INVESTMENT IN PHYSICAL SIGHT."

"True vision is the natural perception of spiritual sight, but it is still a A CORRECTION RATHER THAN A FACT. 2 Spiritual sight is SYMBOLIC, and therefore NOT a device for knowing. 3 It is, however, a means of right perception, which brings it into the proper domain of the miracle. 4 A "vision of God" would be a miracle rather than a revelation. 5 The fact that perception is involved at all REMOVES THE EXPERIENCE from the realm of knowledge. 6 That is why visions, however holy, do not last." (even 'heaven on earth' does not last)

"W-pII.10.2. The final judgment on the world contains no condemnation. 2 For it sees the world as totally forgiven, without sin and WHOLLY PURPOSELESS. 3 WITHOUT A CAUSE, and now WITHOUT A FUNCTION in Christ's sight, it merely SLIPS AWAY INTO NOTHINGNESS. 4 THERE IT WAS BORN, and there IT ENDS AS WELL. 5 And all the figures in the dream in which the world began go with it. 6 BODIES NOW ARE USELESS, and will therefore FADE AWAY, because the Son of God is limitless."

I was contemplating again any possible conceivable way that the physical world might somehow be part of heaven, or preserved, or keepable, or transformable. Like, if we all became very christly and "dreamed" it into some kind of much higher form, a forgiven world, a sparkling beautiful world full of life, could such a world be integrated into heaven and literally kept as an eternal thing? Could the mis-creation be converted into or replaced by a creation that lasts forever, such that Earth would essentially be "saved" to such an extent that it could qualify as a legitimate created part of the kingdom of God forever?

To this Jesus remarked, "No. Spacetime will end."

A key thing to realize is that the physical world, the planet, bodies etc, matter, atoms, it all DEPENDS entirely on separation. Space itself is the very idea that what is over here is not over there. That's a separation idea of exclusion. One atom is excluded from another. There might be a HINT of sharing but certainly not oneness.

Without separateness you can't have atoms and molecules or bodies or planets. You have to have a way that something is different over here than over there, forms lack other forms, what is found in one place is not found in another. That's the very idea of space itself. Without space, or spatial separation, physical matter is impossible. My car being separate from my house is impossible. My body being separate from other bodies is impossible. Without separation Earth is impossible.

When the spacetime world is forgiven, it no longer has a PURPOSE. Because the purpose of it originally was to attack God, and this purpose was exchanged for the purpose of forgiveness. Using the world to undo the NEED for the world. Using the body to undo the NEED for a body. And once perception has been perfected there is no longer any NEED for perception.

And so the body and perception and the world and space and time become PURPOSELESS, ie there is no need or USE for it, no further repurposing of it, and being completely pointless and unneeded it is simply forgotten and VANISHES COMPLETELY. Cast off and un-remembered, like a dream that passes and has no bearing on what really exists.

The world does not reach a state of becoming totally needed, totally wanted, totally valuable, totally eternal, or totally useful. Its usefulness is temporary because in and of itself it is meaningless. IT WILL END. And every single piece of content inside of the spacetime bubble will disappear, all matter, all bodies, along with space and time itself. And all that will remain is the heaven that existed BEFORE this whole illusion of a world emerged in our imaginations in the first place.

"The real world signifies the end of time, for its perception makes time purposeless."

"So do the parts of God's Son gradually join in time, and with each joining is the end of time brought nearer."

"Salvation is a promise, made by God, that you would find your way to Him at last. It cannot not be kept. It guarantees that time will have an end, and all the thoughts that have been born in time will end as well."

"And once all guilt is gone what more remains to keep a separated world in place? For place has gone as well, along with time."

"Ultimately, of course, space is as meaningless as time. The concept is really one of space-time BELIEF."

"The Atonement was built into the space-time belief in order to set a limit on the need for the belief, and ultimately to make learning complete."

"And here They join, for here the face of Christ has shone away time's final instant"

"The stars will disappear in light, and the sun, which opened up the world to beauty, will vanish."

"The world will end in an illusion, as it began. Yet will its ending be an illusion of mercy. The illusion of forgiveness, complete, excluding no-one, limitless in gentleness, will cover it, hiding all evil, concealing all sin and ending guilt forever. So ends the world that guilt had made, for now it has no purpose and is gone."

"The world will end when all things in it have been rightly judged by His judgment. The world will end with the benediction of holiness upon it. When not one thought of sin remains, the world is over. It will not be destroyed nor attacked nor even touched. It will merely cease to seem to be."

"The world will end when its thought system has been completely reversed."

"Beyond the body, beyond the sun and stars, past EVERYTHING you see and yet somehow familiar, is an arc of golden light that stretches, as you look, into a great and shining circle. And all the circle fills with light before your eyes."

In Lesson 128 Jesus clearly outlines that this world has nothing that you want.

"The world you see has nothing that you need to offer you; nothing that you can use in any way, nor anything at all that serves to give you joy."

"Each thing you value here is but a chain that binds you to the world, and it will serve no other end but this."

He is clearly saying in this passage and many others that the physical world we made, is nothing, is worth nothing, has no value, and no meaning. It can do nothing for you, it can add nothing to God's creation, and you do not want it.

UrT8F2 "The world can ADD nothing to the power and the glory of God and His Holy Sons, but it CAN blind the Sons to the Father if they behold it. You cannot behold the world and know God. Only one is true."

When you really closely look at the nature and functioning of this world, which is devouring and destroying, the picture can become very bleak and pointless. After all, if everything eventually dies in the end, this invalidates the point of doing anything at all.

Why bother when everything you build will crumble and be destroyed, when everything is futile and nothing lasts? Indeed it is a world of utter hopelessness and empty promises and lost causes. We are asked to look at this and accept that this is its nature so that we can save ourselves a great deal is misery expecting it to turn out differently, because the world has disappointed us even since time began. We need to recognize it is NOT what God wills for us and it is NOT what we want.

However, Jesus goes onto say in the next lesson that we cannot stop there, because if we make the world seem like it's all that exists and we point out its utter bleakness and the shit-show that it is, we will become depressed. If we really are willing to recognize there is NO hope in the world at all, and it has NOTHING to offer, we need something else of greater merit and real hope to choose instead. ie there MUST be a better way, and reality HAS to be better than this.

Lesson 129 "You cannot stop with the idea the world is worthless, for unless you see that there is something else to hope for you will only be depressed."

Many of us do not want to look at the worthlessness of the world and we still have "false hopes" that it can be redeemed. Some of us even want to turn it into a heaven-on-earth scenario. But perhaps we don't realize that the laws of physics will always be the determiner of the way it functions, and is the direct cause of all its deathly ways and cruel scenarios and chaotic outcomes. Because it is governed by laws of death.

UrT1B37AE "The thing to do with a desert is to LEAVE."

Jesus therefore tells us in Lesson 129 that there is ANOTHER WORLD that we do want, a world where there is permanent happiness and peace and love and light and joy forever. A world in which there is no sickness or death. A living world of light in which we have our home in God, safe from all attack and from death itself. That is a world that we can truly have hope for and want and choose instead of the sorry world we made. But why would you WANT to go there if you think THIS world has something worth keeping you bound?

In Lesson 130 we then go on to be informed that we cannot see both of these worlds. When you see one of them it is precisely because you are denying the other. Since they are opposites, the ability to see one of them derives from the "projection makes perception" rule, meaning that you can only see the light while you're not seeing the darkness, and vice versa. Either you see the world of form or the world of spirit. Reality or unreality are your only options.

So that now tells us that if we want to truly find hope of freedom and escape from the hell that is planet Earth, prison planet of death and murder and hatred, then we need to change what we value. We need to want and value and desire to see another world that is sane and true and holy. A world God created instead of a dead-end of suffering and death that we tried to make without him. If we want to see that other world we're going to have to DENY this one.

W130 "It is impossible to see two worlds which have no overlap of any kind. Seek for the one; the other disappears. But one remains. They are the range of choice beyond which your decision cannot go. The real and the unreal are all there is to choose between, and nothing more than these."

"This world you see MUST BE DENIED, for sight of it is costing you a different kind of vision. YOU CANNOT SEE BOTH WORLDS, for each of them involves a different kind of seeing, and depends on what you cherish. The sight of one is possible because you have denied the other." UrT12G1

Note that it says it depends on what you cherish, which means what you value and want and find to be your heart's treasure. What is meaningful to you, what is important to you, what you prioritize and want to see more of. If your focus is on vigilance for the Kingdom of God, then it means you love the Kingdom and want it and become one with it, making it a part of you and immersing yourself into it. And by doing so you turn your back on the world and forget it and no longer see it.

W306 "What but Christ's vision would I use today, when it can offer me a day in which I see a world so like to Heaven that an ancient memory returns to me? Today I can forget the world I made."

W198 "Accept the one illusion which proclaims there is no condemnation in God's Son, and Heaven is remembered instantly; the world forgotten, all its weird beliefs forgotten with it, as the Face of Christ appears unveiled at last in this one dream. "

So basically right now the only reason you are seeing planet earth is because you are still convinced that you WANT TO. You still value something about it. You still therefore think it HAS value, is important, is worthwhile, has meaning, is true, is to be cherished, has something you want, serves you, provides for you, gives you stuff you like, and is filled with your idols. All of this has to be surrendered and recognized as false and nothing if you are to choose another world.

The course therefore is really asking us to turn around and move back towards heaven, back to reality, to the light, to the truth of God and his world. The Kingdom he created to be permanent and loving forever. A Kingdom so unlike this world that at first it may seem alien to you, and yet familiar as your true home. But to see it, we have to learn to develop "vision" and open the mind's eye. And to do that you have to value it and want it.

UrT18B3 "That was the first projection of error outward. The world arose to hide it, and became the screen on which it was projected, and drawn between you and truth."

We're asked therefore to change our focus and fix our sight on God. To try to pierce the veil of illusions that hangs heavily between you and reality. To find a way with your mind and with the Holy Spirit to overlook (forgive) the world, NOT see it, see through and BEYOND it to the light, and therefore look upon reality/the real world.

UrW158L7 "Christ's vision has one law. It does not look upon a body and mistake it for the Son whom God created. It beholds a light beyond the body; an idea beyond what can be touched, a purity undimmed by errors, pitiful mistakes, and fearful thoughts of guilt from dreams of sin. It sees no separation. And it looks on everyone, on every circumstance, all happenings and all events, without the slightest fading of the light it sees."

This is what the course is driving at - restoring the ability to see reality again to the sheer extent that the world of illusions, of form and bodies and sin and death, is no longer seen at all. And heaven is all that remains in our sight. Right before you melt back into God, infuse back into heaven, and immerse yourself back into communion with the Sonship.

UrU5A4 "The world stands like a block before Christ's face. But true perception looks on it as nothing more than just a fragile veil, so easily dispelled that it can last no longer than an instant. It is seen at last for only what it is. And now it cannot fail to disappear, for now there is an empty place made clean and ready. Where destruction was perceived the face of Christ appears, and in that instant is the world forgot, with time forever ended as the world spins into nothingness from where it came."

As you work to forgive yourself and recognize your own innocence, you become more loving. But you're going to find that this cannot happen in isolation.

As you increase your light, and no longer believe sinfulness or guilt within yourself, you're going to encounter the fact that other people still regard themselves as sinful and guilty.

This puts you in a position where you "have more" than they do, and are in a lighter place than they are.

"Miracles supply a lack." "Miracles are given by those who temporarily have more to those who temporarily have less."

If you were to simply "drop down" to where they are at, through false empathy, you will lose your light. You also can't maintain a forgiving perspective on yourself if you still run into the obstacles to peace that other people put in place.

So that means that sooner or later, as you continue to ascend into the light, you're going to have to start moving past other people's guilt. Whatever their belief or darkness is, if you don't forgive it in them, you can't maintain your state of mind.

"When I am healed I am not healed alone."

That means you begin to no longer support other people's self attack. You start to question whether they are guilty. And you start to support the light in them as well. You begin to steer them towards the light, so that you can remain in light.

As this progresses, it's going to become very natural that as you become more loving, you will automatically uplift others as well. You will have to not believe that they are guilty, in order for you to not be guilty. You can't have different rules for them and you - that's ego.

So that means that you becoming healed, you begin to turn into an instrument for healing.

"Those who are healed become instruments of healing."

This isn't even really optional, unless you want to go back into darkness. By stepping into light and recognizing the Golden Rule, and developing what is now a shared interest, you literally HAVE to have a healing and forgiving attitude towards others in order to maintain your own. This isn't a passive state of just sitting there observing, it's an active DOING and a going out and an expressing towards others in relationship.

This positions you as a healer and a forgiver of others. And I don't mean in the sense that you do forgivenesses about the stuff you think other people do to you. If you have BECOME healed, you are now in a position to undo the confusion of others and shine past their blockages.

Your mind becomes constructive, rather than destructive, as it realizes that only by supporting light can it move towards heaven, and only by moving towards creation can it move away from its own self destruction. This puts you in a position to constructively assist others who are trying to destroy themselves.

"By denying his mind any destructive potential, and reinstating its purely constructive powers, he has placed himself in a position where he can undo the level confusion of others. The message which he then gives to others is the truth that THEIR MINDS are really similarly constructive, and that their own miscreations cannot hurt them. By affirming this, the miracle worker releases the mind from over-evaluating its own learning device (the body), and restores the mind to its true position as the learner."

It is not only your duty and role, but also your right and privilege, to assist others in this way, healing them and enlightening them and steering them towards their innocence.

"Having been restored to your original state, you naturally become part of the Atonement yourself. You now share MY inability to tolerate the lack of love in yourself and in everyone else, and MUST join the GREAT CRUSADE to correct it."

"It is the privilege of the forgiven to forgive."

The correct and effective forgiveness of yourself does lead to an automatic function of healing on earth, in relation to others, which you share with the Holy Spirit. This function positions you as the light of the world.

"Forgiveness is my function as the light of the world."

"Do His work, for you SHARE in His function. As your function in Heaven is creation, so your function on earth is healing. God shares His function with you in Heaven, and the Holy Spirit shares His with you on earth."

In this function, this natural role, you profess Christ. And this professing or expressing of Christ is a healing function which is given to others. To those who have less light than you, in order to raise them up and resurrect them.

"The Disciples were officially and specifically told to heal others, as Physicians of the Lord. They were also told to heal themselves, and were promised that I would never leave them or forsake them. Atonement is the natural profession of the Children of God, because they have professed Me."

This is the point at which you become a miracle worker who is in service to others.

"Miracles are the maximal service you can render another."

Serving, therefore, is what you automatically do, or move into doing, as your own awakening progresses. If you have received miracles then it is automatic that you will give them. To receive them you have to recognize your innocence, which you have to believe is true of everyone, otherwise it cannot be fully believed. And this recognizing that the same truth (golden rule) applies to everyone makes you ready and willing and able to reinforce it in others."You can only give the miracles you have received."

Thus you join the great crusade, you become the atonement, you are now part of the plan and a mechanism which God is using to bring about the healing and awakening of your brothers. As a Teacher of God you now function as part of God's way of bringing everyone home, because atonement is more than just about your own personal salvation, it's about the salvation of the entire sonship.

You can either accept what is real and true, or you can deny it. Denying it doesn't mean you change it, or make it go away. It just means you are unwilling to accept that it's still true. It means you're hiding from it and don't want to admit that it's true.

We're all living in a state of denial. A denial of reality, of God, of ourselves, of identity, of truth, of love etc. This denial of reality puts us out of touch with reality, which means we are insane. In this insanity, which is 'sin', we life a fantasy life pretending to be something we're not, such as a body.

Atonement is offered as "accepting the truth". That means accepting reality as it is, accepting who you and others really are, and no longer being at war with God. This puts you in "contact" with reality, because you've been out of touch with it.

"Miracles are examples of right thinking. Reality contact at all levels becomes strong and accurate, thus permitting correct delineation of intra- and interpersonal boundaries. As a result, the doer sees the truth as God created it. This is what is meant by the point on "perspective adjustment."

Our goal is to perceive the truth as God created it. Not to adjust it, or change it, or want something else to be true. To withdraw all artificial values and beliefs and powers and laws, accepting only those given by God. To recognize and accept and live only the reality and life given by God, in its original and raw unchanged form.

To do that we have to come out of denial. We may not even realize we are in denial, because being in denial is not exactly a state of admitting to anything. It's a state of lies and deceptions and an unwillingness to admit the truth. But we need to become aware of the ways that we are in denial, and overcome this denial.

To overcome denial we need to move into acceptance. Acceptance means agreement, and no longer be at war with reality. It means no more resistance, no more fear, no more hiding, no more pretending, just direct raw reality contact and deep honesty. This deep honestly permits full wholeness of awareness. Everything is seen in light and nothing is concealed. And in that state is innocence and peace.

We're basically pouting little ego children who don't want to admit that God loves us. We've thrown away our inheritance from God including his power and love. We think we know better and are in a bad mood off in some corner in the dark plotting revenge.

To get over this denial takes a lot of work to find a way to accept the facts. Acceptance is not easy because you believe that your resistance will get you what you want, will let you keep what you've lost, and will allow you to control reality. By remaining in denial, you can pretend that things are still how you want them. You can even pretend to not admit that someone died, for example, by not accepting that it's happened, as if this keeps them around.

In various ways we are sort of reacting to what we think of as the death of God, the separation, the absence of love. A rift and a relationship breakdown, as if we lost our home and our family and everything we loved and valued. And now everyone is in a state of loss trying to figure out how to get back what they lost, while believing they haven't lost it. When will we accept what is true, that nothing real can ever be lost?

"Everyone is looking for himself and the power and glory he thinks he has lost."

"denial of Life perceives its opposite, as ALL forms of denial replace what IS, with what is NOT. No-one can really DO this, but that you can THINK you can, and BELIEVE YOU HAVE, is beyond dispute."

"This is not difficult to realize in some forms which these self-deceptions take, for the denial of reality is very obvious."

"YOUR denial of reality precludes ACCEPTANCE of God's gift, BECAUSE YOU HAVE ACCEPTED SOMETHING ELSE IN ITS PLACE. If you understand that the misuse of defenses always constitutes an attack on truth, and truth is God, you will realize why this is ALWAYS fearful."

"It is the DENIAL of the spark that brings depression, and whenever you see your brothers WITHOUT it, you ARE denying God."

"Allegiance to the denial of God is the ego's religion. The god of sickness obviously demands the denial of health, because health is in direct opposition to its own survival."

"What makes this world seem real except your own denial of the truth which lies beyond?"

"For the separation is only the DENIAL of union, and, correctly interpreted, attests to your eternal knowledge that union is true."

"The task of the miracle-worker thus becomes to DENY THE DENIAL OF TRUTH."

"The ACCEPTANCE of peace is the denial of illusion, and sickness IS an illusion."

"The resurrection is the denial of death, being the assertion of life."

"ONLY YOU CAN DEPRIVE YOURSELF OF ANYTHING. Do not oppose this realization, for it is truly the beginning of the dawn of light. Remember also that the denial of this simple fact takes many forms, and these you must learn to recognize, and oppose steadfastly and WITHOUT EXCEPTION."

"That is why the ego IS the denial of free will."

"And therefore those who look on sin ARE seeing the DENIAL of the real world."

"All fear comes ultimately, and sometimes by way of very devious routes, from the denial of Authorship."

"Guilt hides Christ from your sight, for it is the denial of the blamelessness of God's Son."

"Being made out of the denial of the Father, the ego has no allegiance to its own Maker."

Often when you are experiencing some long-term struggle with something, where you have a lot of emotions and stress about it, when the thing finally gets resolved something happens.

Since you now perceive that the problem has gone, it's kind of like lifting the lid off a saucepan filled with reactions. Emotions that you were bottling up and didn't seem to be resolveable. All the feelings you werehaving in the midst of real-seeming problems, worries, fears, guilts etc, suddenly come flying up into awareness for release. The foundation and purpose of them is gone, so there's nothing to keep them in place.

I've seen this happen in myself countless times. Once the psychological perception that you have a real problem is lifted, the reactions to believing the problem was real suddenly have no "ceiling" to stop them flooding out. So on comes the catharsis.

Going through this right now, following my recent intense forgiveness and atonement about an event from many years ago. Even though the experience of the atonement was filled with innocence and truth, and even though it unlocked something in my mind and changed my perception forever, up now comes a large volume of emotinal baggage which is "no longer relevant". So it's kind of like flushing the toilet.

Light goes in (you eat light), you process it, darkness comes out the other end (shit).

As usual I did not really know what was bugging me until Jesus clued me in that this was happening. So it was time to fetch the tissues.

And then it became a great excus for some ice cream!

Concern about being noticed in public, wanting to hide, feeling anxious etc... stemming from a sense of guilt or shame. You walk around with it believing that people will find out or point it out. You feel exposed by it, as if it is a label that everyone can see and which you must recoil from just as they would. It makes you experience yourself as though you are highly visible, like a red flag with a wailing siren, drawing all attention to what you are ashamed of. It makes you think you stand out like a sore thumb, which makes you afraid of attack or judgement, which makes you hide even more. You feel unsafe, because your shame and guilt have condemned you and now you think it's only a matter of time before punishment comes, which you try to avoid all the time.

You don't have to be ashamed of what you think you did. It is forgivable. Doesn't matter what it is or how serious or dark or twisted. You still deserve love and forgiveness. God still smiles and shines upon you with happy acceptance. You don't have to walk around feeling vulnerable and exposed and afraid of revenge. Stop attacking yourself with it. Its your own belief in your own self-attack that makes you believe in the attacking advances of others. In your innocence you no longer have something about you that you need be concerned about, or self-conscious about, or worried that people will agree with and attack you for. Defenses which hide your self-condemnation doesnt make you feel safe. But in your innocence lies your safety.

I notice myself wavering back and forth in trust, between believing the ego's temptations that something is going wrong, versus recognizing the truth that nothing can go wrong.

On the one hand, the truth says we are all immortal and invulnerable and sinless and holy, in perfect health and guaranteed happiness, alive forever in God and incapable of suffering.

Then on the other hand, stuff happens in the world and it tempts me to believe that something can't be healed or undone or fixed, something is irreversible, something bad has happened or there is no hope.

I sometimes notice that I'm buying into this ego victimhood illusions stuff, and then remember that the truth says something much more permanent and hope-filled. But I'm still tentative about trusting it fully. There is always this ego allegiance which says, "well... I'm not quite sure, what about..."

Sometimes the truth seems unbelievable. Sometimes the idea of immortality, eternal life, divine health, perfect holiness, invulnerability, being cause not effect, etc, seems so high and lofty, it seems difficult to really deeply believe it, at all times.

It's a matter of trust. I don't fully trust it yet. But some part of me has opened up to it and has trusted it to some degree, because at least at times I doubt my ego beliefs which speak the total opposite and make problems real.

I can see the clarity and light in siding with the truth and the promise it holds, which seems in the long term to be a beacon of certainty and joy, but in the meantime I dip in and out of it, sometimes much more miraculously-minded and sometimes just coasting along unconsciously.

I like in the course when Jesus says, comfortingly, "at least you are no longer wholly insane". lol

"I want the peace of God." W185

I've been realising more and more lately that peace is a vital core part of awakening to reality. And here's why.

Before "the separation" there was union and oneness. The idea of separation first began as nothing more perhaps than a very subtle sense of taking sides. Of there being a very slight difference between what seemed to be two things, instead of one thing. A hint of inequality and a vague notion of something belonging to one part and not another.

This mad idea later snowballed to the fullest extent of possibility, into greater and stronger senses of separateness, opposition, inequality, difference and all manner of exclusivity. In effect, "war broke out". A state of psychological war in which the peace of oneness was brought into question.

"And the peace of God's Son was shattered, for he no longer understood his Father." UrT12C11

"Angels came, too, but their protection was not enough, because the Separated ones were not interested in peace. They had already split themselves, and were bent on dividing rather than reintegrating. The levels they introduced into themselves turned against each other, and they, in turn, turned against each other. They established differences, divisions, cleavages, dispersion, and all the other concepts related to the increasing splits they produced." UrT2B43

Ultimately all of what we think of space and time, all physical matter, all objects, planet Earth, human bodies, and all the rest of it, descended as the crystallizing of this simple idea of being separate - separate instead of whole. And that was an idea of conflict, of war, of things disagreeing, of nothing being the same.

In heaven there is perfect peace because there is no possibility of war. There are no separated off things that can be enemies, nor can they attack anything else. There is no sense of threat or danger, no ability to harm or alter God's perfect creations. And without such threats there is no sense of fear, or a "loss of peace" or a disruption to "peace of mind."

Our minds did little more than enter into a state of believing in separate things. That sense of separation took on every conceivable form, including war and attack, blame and murder, sickness and death, destruction and change, judgement and condemnation, danger and threat, conflict and disagreement, inequality and disharmony, and everything we're all familiar with in our lives on earth - a planet which itself depends entirely on separation and war for its illusory existence.

We then need to seek to reclaim our peace of mind. That means, all the ways that we be SEPARATE have to end. All sense of attacking, all desire to hurt, all cruelty, all murderousness, all blame and judgement, all condemnation and grievances, it all has to collapse so that the SEPARATIONS between things are collapsed, restoring unity and oneness.

ONLY in that unity of oneness is true peace fully possible, because it's a state in which all sense of separation is absent. War becomes impossible, and without war there is no fighting, no conflict, no disturbance, no loss, no imbalance, no sin or guilt or death. Peace is an attribute of a sane healthy mind which has been restored to wholeness. Because in wholeness there is no split mind, no divided will, and you are no longer at war with yourself. This is accomplished through forgiveness.

"Forgiveness IS your peace, for herein lies the end of separation, and the dream of danger and destruction, sin and death; of madness and of murder, grief and loss." UrT29G1

"Peace is an attribute in YOU. You cannot find it outside. All mental illness is some form of EXTERNAL searching. Mental health is INNER peace. It enables you to remain unshaken by lack of love from without, and capable, through your own miracles of correcting the external conditions, which proceed from lack of love in others." UrT2A32

To gain peace, all your psychological weapons have to be laid down. All sense of wanting to attack, wanting to resist and fight, wanting to hurt and destroy has to be undone. And undoing all of this is a surrender. It is this surrender that ends the war, a surrendering of all ego pursuits and beliefs. When you wave the white flag, you return to peace, because the end of war is indeed peace. Nor will your peace mean defeat, but victory and invulnerability.

"Judgment is the weapon I would use against myself to keep all miracles away from me." URW347

"Now must you once again lay down your sword, although you will not recognize that you have picked it up again" UrM21A4

"Every time you feel a stab of anger, realize you hold a sword above your head." UrW192L9

"Nor is it possible the two can ever be the same, while specialness stands like a flaming sword of death between them, and makes them enemies." UrT24D4

"Lay down the cruel sword of judgment that you hold against your throat, and put aside the withering assaults with which you seek to hide your holiness." UrW190L9

"How long, oh Son of God, will you maintain the game of sin? Shall we not put away these sharp-edged children's toys?" UrW250W45