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W69L

Lesson 69 "My grievances hide the light of the world in me."

W69L1

No one can look upon what your grievances conceal. Because your grievances are hiding the light of the world in you, everyone stands in darkness, and you beside him. But as the veil of your grievances is lifted, you are released with him. Share your salvation now with him who stood beside you when you were in hell. He is your brother in the light of the world which saves you both.

W69L2

Today let us make another real attempt to reach the light in you. Before we undertake this in our more extended practice period, let us devote several minutes in thinking about what we are trying to do. We are literally attempting to get in touch with the salvation of the world. We are trying to see past the veil of darkness that keeps it concealed. We are trying to let the veil be lifted, and see the tears of God's Son disappear in the sunlight.

W69L3

Let us begin our longer practice period today with the full realization of all this, and real determination to reach what is dearer to us than all else. Salvation is our only need. There is no other purpose here, and no other function to fulfill. Learning salvation is our only goal. Let us end the ancient search today, by finding the light in us and holding it up for everyone who searches with us to look upon and rejoice.

W69L4

Very quietly now, with your eyes closed, try to let all the content which generally occupies your consciousness go. Think of your mind as a vast round area, surrounded by a layer of heavy dark clouds. You can see only the clouds because you seem to be standing outside the whole area, and quite apart from it. From where you stand, you can see no reason to believe there is a brilliant light hidden by the clouds. The clouds seem to be the only reality. They seem to be all there is to see. Therefore you do not attempt to go through them and past them, which is the only way in which you would be really convinced of their lack of substance. We will make this attempt today.

W69L5

After you have thought about the importance of what you are trying to do for yourself and the world, try to settle in perfect stillness, remembering only how much you want to reach the light in you today, - now. Determine to go past the clouds. Reach out and touch them in your mind. Brush them aside with your hand; feel them resting on your cheeks and forehead and eyelids as you go through them. Go on; clouds cannot stop you.

W69L6

If you are doing the exercises properly, you will begin to feel a sense of being lifted up and carried ahead. Your little effort and small determination call on the power of the universe to help you, and God Himself will raise you from darkness into light. You are in accord with His Will. You cannot fail because your will is His.

W69L7

Have confidence in your Father today, and be certain that He has heard you and has answered you. You may not recognize His answer yet, but you can indeed be sure that it is given you, and you will yet receive it. Try, as you attempt to go through the clouds to the light, to hold this confidence in your mind. Try to remember that you are at last joining your will to God's. Try to keep the thought clearly in mind that what you undertake with God must succeed. Then let the power of God work in you and through you, that His Will and yours may be done.

W69L8

In the shorter practice periods, which you will want to do as often as possible in view of the importance of today's idea to you and your happiness, remind yourself that your grievances are hiding the light of the world from your awareness. Remind yourself also that you are not searching for it alone, and that you do know where to look for it. Say, then:

"My grievances hide the light of the world in me.

I cannot see what I have hidden.

Yet I want to let it be revealed to me

for my salvation and the salvation of the world."

Also, be sure to tell yourself:

"If I hold this grievance, the light of the world will be hidden from me,"

if you are tempted to hold anything against anyone today.

W70L

Lesson 70 "My salvation comes from me."

W70L1

All temptation is nothing more than some form of the basic temptation not to believe the idea for today. Salvation seems to come from anywhere except from you. So, too, does the source of guilt. You see neither guilt nor salvation as in your own mind, and nowhere else. When you realize that all guilt is solely an invention of your mind, you must also realize that guilt and salvation must be in the same place. Understanding this you are saved.

W70L2

The seeming "cost" of accepting today's idea is this: It means that nothing outside yourself can save you; nothing outside yourself can give you peace. But it also means that nothing outside yourself can hurt you, or disturb your peace, or upset you in any way. Today's idea places you in charge of the universe, where you belong because of who you are.

W70L3

This is not a role which can be partially accepted, and you must surely begin to see that accepting it is salvation. It may not, however, be clear to you why the recognition that guilt is in your own mind entails the realization that salvation is there as well. God would not have put the remedy for sickness where it cannot help. That is the way your mind has worked, but hardly His. He wants you to be healed, and so He has kept the Source of healing where the need for healing lies.

W70L4

You have tried to do just the opposite, making every attempt, however distorted and fantastic it might be, to separate healing from the sickness for which it was intended, and thus keep the sickness. Your purpose was to ensure that healing did not occur; God's purpose was to ensure that it did. Today we will practice realizing that God's Will and ours are really the same in this. God wants us to be healed, and we do not really want to be sick because it makes us unhappy. Therefore, in accepting the idea for today, we are in agreement with God. He does not want us to be sick. Neither do we. He wants us to be healed. So do we.

W70L5

We are ready for two longer practice periods today, each of which should last some ten to fifteen minutes. We will, however, still let you decide when to undertake them. We will follow this practice for a number of lessons, and it would again be well to decide in advance when would be a good time to lay aside for each of them, and adhere to your own decision as closely as possible.

W70L6

Begin these practice periods by repeating the idea for today, adding a statement signifying your recognition that salvation comes from nothing outside of you. You might put it this way:

"My salvation comes from me.

It cannot come from anywhere else."

Then devote a few minutes with your eyes closed, to reviewing some of the external places where you have looked for salvation in the past, - in other people, in possessions, in various situations and events, and in self-concepts which you sought to make real. Recognize that it was not there. Tell yourself:

"My salvation cannot come from any of these things.

My salvation comes from me, and only from me."

W70L7

Now we will try again to reach the light in you, which is where your salvation is. You cannot find it in the clouds that surround the light, and it is in them you have been looking for it. It is not there. It is past the clouds, and in the light beyond. Remember that you will have to go through the clouds before you can reach the light. But remember also that you have never found anything in the cloud patterns you imagined that endured, or that you wanted.

W70L8

Since all illusions of salvation have failed you, surely you do not want to remain in the clouds looking vainly for idols there, when you could so easily walk on into the light of real salvation. Try to pass the clouds by whatever means appeals to you. If it helps you, think of me holding your hand and leading you. And I assure you that this will be no idle fantasy.

W70L9

For the short and frequent practice periods today, remind yourself that your salvation comes from you, and nothing but your own thoughts can hamper your progress. You are free from all external interference. You are in charge of your salvation. You are in charge of the salvation of the world. Say, then:

"My salvation comes from me.

Nothing outside of me can hold me back.

Within me is the world's salvation and my own."

W256L

Lesson 256 "God is the only goal I have today."

W256L1

The way to God is through forgiveness here. There is no other way. If sin had not been cherished by the mind, what need would there have been to find a way to where you are? Who would still be uncertain? Who could be unsure of who he is? And who would yet remain asleep in heavy clouds of doubt about the holiness of him whom God created sinless? Here we can but dream. But we can dream we have forgiven him in whom all sin remains impossible, and it is this we choose to dream today. God is our goal; forgiveness is the means by which our minds return to Him at last.

W256L2

"And so, our Father, would we come to You in Your appointed way. We have no goal except to hear Your Voice, and find the way Your sacred Word has pointed out to us."

"I want the peace of God." W185

There's over 100 references in ACIM to "the peace of God". Years ago I wouldn't have thought that peace is something I want. It wasn't a priority. I just wanted all the stupid people to go away, lol.

But the more I've done the course the more it's becoming apparent that peace is very central to the experience I SHOULD be having.

I had a dream a few years ago which showed me an example of extraordinary peace.

In the dream there was a small outdoor scene with some trees and a wild grassy area, and a sort of sky with clouds, although the clouds seemed to be very nearby.

The clouds parted and as they did, they took on an extraordinary emerald green color, rich and vibrant and beautiful. An opening appeared and there floated in, from beyond the clouds, were a pair of beautiful orbs of light, which seemed to be radiating life and light and coloring the landscape as they went.

These orbs were spheres, and glowed gently from within. It wasn't like a dazzling light, just a soft glow. They seemed mostly transparent, and about the size of a bowling ball.

The two orbs floated very slowly and quietly past where I stood, and continued to float on forward, under their own will. But the thing that really struck me was the quality of the atmosphere and how it felt.

The orbs were alive, and were aware, and were extremely peaceful. They seemed to have no ounce of a sense of attack or irritation or disturbance. They were so incredibly calm and quiet, so perfectly innocent, holy even.

They could not not have been more pure, more simple, or more beautiful. They just glided along softly together, as though accompanying each other, and were perfectly unhurried and peaceful.

That's about where the dream ends. But I still think back on it and, when I do, I feel that same peace, and it becomes an inspiration. As I think about what that felt like, I can draw a number of ideas from it.

A total lack of all conflict, a total absence of war, a total lack of any sense of fighting or disturbance or angry aggression. A total innocence, so pure and gentle and simple, like it was just born from God.

No sense of irritation, or annoyance, or frustration or any kind of bitterness or resentment. No sense of guilt or sin or shame or unworthiness. Not the slightest speck of inflammation or agitation or interruption of any kind.

Perfectly calm and tranquil, with no force or pressure, no sense of threat or danger, no concern or worry or doubt or fear. Nothing complicated or distorted, no denial or rejection, no defences, and absolutely no sense of urgency.

Just total calm and total peace and total simple being. Total freedom, total beautiful innocent simplicity, and total calm gentle joy.

This I feel is what I really want, and what we all want. And it highlights how all these things that were absent - are all things that we are so accustomed to living with and tolerating. All the ego emotions and hurts, all the fighting and war and conflict, all the fear and guilt. All of it has to go.

I used to think somehow that the pinnacle of human experience might be some kind of heroic role in which we have superpowers and can do whatever we want, flying around the room with a cloak on. But this ego fantasy of being the savior to wretched peasants is being replaced with a simpler goal of humbleness and quiet.

And when all of that stuff goes, stuff that we think is normal and commonplace, all the sense of separation and tension and conflict goes with it. And what is left is just this lovely extremely calm peacefulness, lacking all sense of something being wrong in any way.

Perhaps that's what we are really. Just simple orbs of light floating around calmly and happily, in total surrender and total contentment, with no enemies and no reasons for concern. Just being at peace with God. Free and alive, floating along with not a care in the world.

I don't just mean in some abstract way or as a concept. Actual love. Huge love. If you would experience God, it would feel like profound, heartfelt, meaningful, deep, real, relateable love, that feels so true and so genuine that nothing compares to it.

And God is in you and with you. And you are in that love and you are that love.

Here is our ONLY problem.

We've tried to deny that this love is there. We've tried to deny that this love is what you ARE.

Right now, unless you are like super awake to reality, you have no idea the profound immensity of unconditional love that is the experience of God. You've never felt anything like it ever in your entire life and cannot even imagine how powerful it is. It's hidden. It's covered up behind layers and layers of shit in your mind.

The shit in your mind is like a giant toilet filled with backed-up shit that's all swirling around and obstructing the awareness that everything is love. That love is present. You need to FLUSH. The shit is the ego. You've taken a huge shit all over yourself and you need to flush it.

The problem also is, that these so-called 'covers' in your mind, the blocks to awareness, make it SEEM LIKE they actually are capable of shutting out the light. This in itself is completely insane. It's like saying, darkness can make light go away. Like, somehow when darkness is present, it can act as a blanket and shut out the light and stop it from shining. Its completely ridiculous but this is exactly how we experience being on the OTHER SIDE of these blocks to awareness.

It's like being on THIS side of clouds... when its cloudy, it seems to block the sun, on this side of the clouds, even though on the other side of the clouds the sun is completely free to shine. When there is a seeming dark obstacle BETWEEN us and the light, it seems to block the light from the perspective of being IN the darkness looking for the light. If we were to be IN the light, looking at the darkness, we would DISPEL IT. We would recognize it does not exist because light shines away the darkness.

So really we've got all these blocks in our mind that are pretending to make it seem like light has GONE, it's left, God is dead, there's no value in God or any reason to want God. But it's not true, that's the illusion of it. God is NOT dead. The light has NOT been extinguished by the ego. The truth has not stopped. Who you really are has not been affected or changed. You are still as God created you and God still loves you completely.

So when the blocks are there, we think love is gone and all hope of finding it again is lost so we go off on a lonely journey trying to find it but hopelessly knowing that we never will. And we'll look everywhere for this salvation, in everything, and it's not there. And then eventually we'll realize, all the things that say you'll find the light in them, are not true. And that's a step toward going within. And then you'll have to look within and find all these things that are blocking the light. And gradually you'll question their motives also and learn they also are not true.

And then lo and behold the final joyous discovery... underneath all these layers of SHIT that you've gotten rid of and flushed... all the clearing out, all the letting go and surrendering of false hopes and ridiculous beliefs in fake needs, all the sense of lack and loss, underneath it is is STILL the intensely bright shining loving light of God, absolutely unchanged, absolutely unaffected by all your travels, and still loving you 100% unconditionally without requirements or needs.

ITS STILL THERE!

YOU'RE STILL THERE!

You are still the you that God created. You need but UNCOVER this in yourself. You don't need to ADD to yourself, or improve on yourself, or make yourself more of yourself. You're already complete, just in denial and hiding. Stop denying who you are. Stop denying God's presence. Accept the truth and be.

I'm trying to clarify what the real world is or it not. I'm just going to waffle on about it here as I look at each quote.

"The real world is a symbol, like the rest of what perception offers. Yet it stands for what is opposite to what you made.

This suggests the real world is something perceptual because dreams contain symbols, and since perception does not exist in heaven (only knowledge), this suggests the real world is not heaven. Yet it appears to be a "reflection of reality". (As I typed this, Jesus said "true").

"The real world holds a counterpart for each unhappy thought reflected in your world"

Suggesting it is also a reflection, or at least opposite to all illusions and lies. As real as perception can get?

"The real world shows a world seen differently, through quiet eyes and with a mind at peace. Nothing but rest is there. There are no cries of pain and sorrow heard, for nothing here remains outside forgiveness. And the sights are gentle. Only happy sights and sounds can reach the mind that has forgiven itself."

It sounds quite advanced that in this state of mind, there is no apparent registering of pain and sorrow coming from other people. These things are perhaps seen in a different light, as calls for love, and therefore there is a recognition that there is no "real sorrow". "The sights are gentle" seems to suggest you wouldn't even see war and death happening? But perhaps it is the WAY you look at them which shows them to you in a way which isn't upsetting any more. OR, possibly, the real world is seen AT THE SAME TIME as perception sees the physical world, since it is like "looking at heaven" vs looking at the world of form. This would be similar to the Holy Spirit being "fixated on God" while also perceiving.

"The real world is the symbol that the dream of sin and guilt is over, and God’s Son no longer sleeps. His waking eyes perceive the sure reflection of his Father’s Love; the certain promise that he is redeemed. The real world signifies the end of time, for its perception makes time purposeless."

Again the real world is referred to as a SYMBOL, meaning it is part of the dream. And also it is referred to as a REFLECTION (not the actual thing, but a reflection of it, once removed). This suggests the term "real world" refers not to that state of mind being "real" in the truest sense, but "real-er" than other ways of perceiving.

"Its perception"... tells us it's something perceived, so we are still in the realm of the world and are not in heaven yet.

"Across the bridge, it is so different! For a time the body is still seen, but NOT exclusively, as it is seen here. For the little spark that holds the Great Rays within it, is ALSO visible, and this spark cannot be limited long to littleness. Once you have crossed the bridge, the VALUE of the body is so diminished in YOUR sight, that you will see no need at all to MAGNIFY it. For you will realize that the ONLY value that the body has, is to enable you to bring your brothers TO the bridge WITH you. And to be RELEASED TOGETHER there."

This lingo sort of seems confusing because it seems you cross a bridge and are on the other side (as if in heaven?) and yet you are still in a body, and yet the ability to remain in the body is very limited due to the magnitude of the mind. So this suggests a state of being still in a body and perceiving but being as pure of mind as is possible while in a body. Again a reflection of heaven rather than pure heaven.

"Sit quietly and look upon the world you see, and tell yourself, "The real world is not like this. It has no buildings, and there are no streets where people walk alone and separately. There are no stores where people buy an endless list of things they do not need. It is not lit with artificial light, and night comes not upon it. There is no day that brightens and grows dim. There is no loss. Nothing is there but shines, and shines forever." This world you see MUST BE DENIED, for sight of it is costing you a different kind of vision. YOU CANNOT SEE BOTH WORLDS. For each of them involves a different kind of seeing, and depends on what you cherish. The sight of one is possible because you have DENIED THE OTHER."

In this sense, it seems that Jesus talks about the real world as if talking about heaven. If he is being very literal (which he usually is) then a state of mind where there are no buildings and people and stuff, ... does not really sound like the world or forms. Above he spoke of only seeing gentle sights and so on, as a "way" of seeing the world. Here he talks of a "place" where there IS no buildings or streets or other forms. This suggests to me that when He speaks of the real world he is a bit "loose" in terms of what it means. ie, the "real world" literally is Heaven, but when we are in a body and still perceiving we see a GLIMPSE of it and a REFLECTION of it, and so it now sounds "as if" the real world is within perception still, but more like... it is just touching on perception lightly and is actually mostly beyond perception and beyond bodies and beyond this world. Like peeking its head in the door. This also reminds me of "the kingdom of heaven is laid out upon the world but you do not see it" and "god is in everything I see because God is in my mind"... referring to states of perception still (seeing the world) but starting to glimpse a heavenly "reality" or "real world" beyond it.

The one word that confused me here at first was "shines forever". If the real world shines forever, that makes it permanent. If the real world were permanent it must be the same thing as heaven. And so since Jesus uses the term to refer sometimes to the reflection of heaven and sometimes to what is fully heaven, since the "real world" in perception reflects reality, it can seem to imply a real perceived world is permanent, but it is not. Because the UNREAL world is let go and disappears, the real world builds a bridge to heaven, and then the true real world is fully experienced as heaven, forever.

"Yet the real world has the power to touch you even here because you love it. And what you call with love will come to you. Love always answers, being unable to deny a call for help or not to hear the cries of pain that rise to it from every part of this strange world you made but do not want. The only effort you need make to give this world away in glad exchange for what you did not make is willingness to learn the one you made is false."

Like here, Jesus says the real world "touches you even here", suggesting that it is NOT here, but is heaven, and yet it is so close that it "touches you" like when two worlds bump up against each other, but you are not yet IN IT. Which again suggests the real world is actually heaven (not this universe whatsoever), but can be "touched upon" while here.

"You will first dream of peace and then awaken to it. Your first exchange of what you made for what you want is the exchange of nightmares for the happy dreams of love. In these lie your true perceptions, for the Holy Spirit corrects the world of dreams, where all perception is. Knowledge needs no correction. Yet the dreams of love lead unto knowledge. In them you see nothing fearful, and because of this, they are the welcome that you offer knowledge. Love waits on welcome, not on time, and the real world is but your welcome of what always was. Therefore, the call of joy is in it, and your glad response is your awakening to what you have not lost. Praise, then, the Father for the perfect sanity of His most holy Son."

The "dream of peace" also sounds like another way to say that "perceiving" the real world while here in a body is still a dream of reality - that's why its a reflection or symbol, and not the actual thing. The real world seems like a bridge that bridges the gaps between heaven and earth, or at least is a joining place or state of mind which is sort of experiencing both temporarily.

"The bridge itself is nothing more than a transition in your PERSPECTIVE of reality. On this side, everything you see is grossly distorted, and COMPLETELY out of perspective. What IS little and insignificant is magnified, and what is strong and powerful, cut down to littleness."

Jesus does refer to a bridge, which suggests that the perception of the reality (truth, heaven) while still in a body is a glimpse of the real world that is on the other side of the bridge, and you can sort of position yourself on the other side and be very close to having heaven in your awareness, but still remaining temporarily in the world. This also correlates to what Jesus says about the body being able to be supernaturally protected, and a sign of immortality, while it is useful, and when used to bring the word of God to those who have it not.

Also I want to make a note about perspective. When there are clouds, the sun is above the clouds and always shining. When you are up there above the clouds, from that perspective, clouds are not blocking the light (awareness). When you move below the clouds however, from "this side", looking back towards the light having been separated from it, it SEEMS as if the clouds block the light. The bottom of the clouds become dark symbolizing their ability to block light and having resulted in the illusion of darkness.

When you are in a state of perception which is level confused, backwards and upside down, ie in the ego more, you see this way and regard darkness as a real block and as if light is hidden. But when you get past the clouds and are aligned with the light and ORIENTED in the direction the light is shining, then you no longer are limited by the clouds and see only light everywhere. From this vantage point or perspective, this is similar to seeing "from" the real world. So you could say that the bridge Jesus refers to, is really the "transition" from being in the dark to being in the light, shifting from false to true perception, and another word for true perception is perception of the "real world". Being on the "other side" of the bridge thus could be referring to being in true perception, since the bridge is somewhere between true and false perception, rather than between the perceptual world and heaven.

"Both are not true, yet either one will seem as real to you, as the amount to which you hold it dear."

Here Jesus refers to both the real world and the fictional world as "not true". So again he's saying, the real world is kind of a term for the "slice" of reality which is partly seen while still in the fictional physical world. The glimpse of reality will become real to you and then act like a bridge TO heaven. The real world is what's perceived when perception is true and accurate, showing you that this world is false and unreal, and opening up to see Christ "beyond" it or "in" it. And eventually the world itself disappears and what was "beyond" and "in it" now becomes a fully present (and only) experience.

"God loves His Son forever, and His Son RETURNS his Father’s Love forever. The real world is the way that leads you to remembrance of this one thing that is wholly true and WHOLLY YOURS. For all else you have LENT yourself in time, and it WILL fade. But this one thing is ALWAYS yours, being the gift of God unto His Son. Your ONE reality was GIVEN you, and BY it, God created you as one with Him."

Here he said "the WAY that LEAD YOU TO remembrance"... like a bridge, or as the meeting point of two worlds or sort of the preparation for going to heaven.

"Love waits on welcome, NOT on time. And the real world is but your welcome of what always was. Therefore the call of joy is in it, and your glad response is your awakening to what you have NOT lost. "

Welcoming what always was is sort of an invitation or openness to it, but not necessarily being in it yet.

"Is it a loss to find a world instead where losing is impossible, where love endures forever, hate cannot exist, and vengeance has no meaning? Is it loss to find all things you really want and know they have no ending, and they will remain exactly as you want them throughout time?

The world mentioned here I think is heaven. But it could apply apply to "Real world".

Yet even they will be exchanged at last for what we cannot speak of, for you go from there to where words fail entirely, into a silence where the language is unspoken and yet surely understood. Communication, unambiguous and plain as day, remains unlimited for all eternity. And God Himself speaks to His Son as His Son speaks to Him. Their language has no words, for what they say cannot be symbolized. Their knowledge is direct and wholly shared and wholly one."

Here then Jesus speaks of what happens when you make the transition FULLY to heaven, which is a world that you cannot see while seeing the physical world (you cannot see two worlds, you cannot behold the world and see heaven). In heaven, fully and completely, BEYOND perception, and BEYOND the slice of the real world that you saw as a reflection (also referred to as the face of christ - his FACE, not his WHOLE SELF), is the world God created which is Heaven, where all is one, and the "real world's" lack of buildings and streets and people is fully experienced.

"Can what has no beginning really end? The world will end in an illusion, as it began. Yet will its ending be an illusion of mercy. The illusion of forgiveness, complete, excluding no one, limitless in gentleness, will cover it, hiding all evil, concealing all sin and ending guilt forever. So ends the world that guilt had made, for now it has no purpose and is gone."

Bye bye planet Earth and the physical universe.

"The world will end in joy, because it is a place of sorrow. When joy has come, the purpose of the world has gone. The world will end in peace, because it is a place of war. When peace has come, what is the purpose of the world? The world will end in laughter, because it is a place of tears. Where there is laughter, who can longer weep? And only complete forgiveness brings all this to bless the world. In blessing it departs, for it will not end as it began. To turn hell into Heaven is the function of God’s teachers, for what they teach are lessons in which Heaven is reflected. And now sit down in true humility, and realize that all God would have you do you can do. Do not be arrogant and say you cannot learn His Own curriculum. His Word says otherwise. His Will be done. It cannot be otherwise. And be you thankful it is so."

A light way to look at things and a dark way. It is similar to how, from above the clouds, the sun shines on everything, and yet beneath the clouds, everything looks dark and threatening.

Looking back toward the light with obstacles in the way, creates the impression of threat and danger and doom and gloom. When the clouds are there, the light seems obscured and it feels like you've got walls keeping you from it. It seems like you're trapped in a prison and that everything is against you.

Looking toward the light from a position of being separated from the light, by the clouds, creates the ego. The ego is an attempt to turn around and look back at God and find him blocked from vision as if he doesn't exist. And when the clouds are heavy, it will feel as if God doesn't exist, as if there is no light.

Shifting back into alignment with the source of light, means getting "above the battlefield", through and beyond the clouds, past the illusion of separateness and self importance, and turning around 180-degrees so that you too are a part of the light that shines outward. You need to become a sunbeam, of sorts, extending love outward.

Looking up to the sun with clouds between you is akin to the ego looking inside at itself. The ego wants to catch a glimpse of itself as if it really exists as a separate identity. What you are 'is', and you can't identify it as something separate from you. Yet when you're "under the weather" and trying to wrestle with upsets and darkness you keep trying to look 'at' yourself, similar to how you keep trying to look back at the sun. You don't really need to look at yourself or to look at the source of light, you need to BE IT.

Changing your vantage point changes your perspective. If your vantage point is rooted in your ego then your ego will do the looking and it will look toward the clouds and tell you the clouds are real and that you're separate from God. This will of course be frightening and horrifying. And it's not true, but it will seem true, and you will feel stuck.

Changing your vantage point to that of Holy Spirit (the sun) changes everything. It changes how everything looks to you and what it means. Your light shines ONTO everything you see illuminating it and revealing its beauty and happiness. It helps you to see clearly and fully. It helps you to not be deceived by the strange shadows that play out on the landscape when you are "in the dark". And it helps you to remember there is ALWAYS another way, ALWAYS a better way than any ego viewpoint.

And you need to be reminded... the light of God is always present and always available and always true and always powerful, and no amount of ego or darkness or horror will EVER obliterate it or shut it out or make it permanently lost. EVER. The light is always stronger than the darkness because the darkness is weakness. The light is always there. It is sanity. It is reason. It is truth. Sooner or later you have to admit to it and allow it and accept it and be it. You can prolong suffering but you cannot make it permanent. The light is calling to you to join it and to laugh at the silliness of the ego's mistakes.

God loves you.

T18J

Section 10 - The Delusional Thought System

T18J1

You have been told to bring the darkness to the light, and guilt to holiness. And you have also been told that error must be corrected at its source. Therefore, it is the tiny part of your self, the little thought that seems split off and separate, that the Holy Spirit needs. The rest is fully in God's keeping, and needs no guide. But this wild and delusional thought needs help, because, in its delusions, it thinks it is the Son of God, whole and omnipotent, sole ruler of the kingdom it set apart, to tyrannize by madness into obedience and slavery.

T18J2

This is the LITTLE part of you, you think you stole from Heaven. Give it back to Heaven. Heaven has not lost it, but YOU have lost sight of Heaven. Let the Holy Spirit remove it from the withered kingdom in which you set it up, surrounded by darkness, guarded by attack, and reinforced by hate. Within its barricades is still a tiny segment of the Son of God, complete and holy, serene and unaware of what you think surrounds it. Be you not separate, for the One Who DOES surround it has brought union to you, returning your little offering of darkness to the Eternal Light.

T18J3

How is this done? It is extremely simple, being based on what this little kingdom really IS. The barren sands, the darkness, and the lifelessness are seen only through the body's eyes. ITS vision IS distorted, and the messages IT transmits to you, who MADE it to limit your awareness, ARE little and limited, so fragmented that they are meaningless. From the world of bodies, MADE by insanity, insane messages seem to be returned to the mind which made it. And these messages bear witness to this world, pronouncing it as true. For YOU sent forth these messengers, to bring this BACK to you.

T18J4

Everything these messages relay to you is quite external. There are NO messages that speak of what lies underneath, for it is NOT the body that could speak of this. Its eyes perceive it not, its senses remain quite UNAWARE of it, its tongue can not relay ITS messages. Yet God can bring you there, if you are willing to follow the Holy Spirit through seeming terror, trusting Him not to abandon you, and LEAVE you there. For it is not HIS purpose to frighten you, but only YOURS. YOU are severely tempted to abandon HIM at the outside ring of fear. But HE would lead you safely through, and FAR beyond.

T18J5

The circle of fear lies just below the level the body sees, and SEEMS to be the whole foundation on which the world is based. Here are all the illusions, all the twisted thoughts, all the insane attacks, the fury, vengeance, and betrayal that were made to keep the guilt in place, so that the world could RISE from it, and keep IT hidden. Its SHADOW rises to the surface, enough to hold its most external manifestations in darkness, and to bring despair and loneliness to it, and keep it joyless. But its INTENSITY is veiled by its heavy coverings, and kept APART from what was made to keep it hidden.

T18J6

The body cannot see this, for the body AROSE from this for its protection, which must ALWAYS depend on keeping it NOT seen. The body's eyes will NEVER look on it. Yet they will SEE what it dictates. The body will remain guilt's messenger, and will act as it directs, as long as YOU believe that guilt is real. For the REALITY of guilt is the illusion which seems to make it heavy and opaque, impenetrable, and a REAL foundation for the ego's thought system. Its thinness and transparency are not apparent, until you see the light BEHIND it. And then you see it as a fragile veil, before the light.

T18J7

This heavy-seeming barrier, this artificial floor that looks like rock, is like a bank of low, dark clouds that seem to be a solid wall before the sun. Its impenetrable appearance is WHOLLY an illusion. It gives way softly to the mountain tops that rise above it, and has no power at all to hold back anyone willing to climb above it, to see the sun. It is not strong enough to stop a button's fall, nor hold a feather. Nothing can rest upon it, for it is but an ILLUSION of a foundation. Try but to touch it, and it disappears; attempt to grasp it, and your hands hold nothing.

T18J8

Yet in this cloud bank it is easy to see a whole world rising. A solid mountain range, a lake, a city, all arise in your imagination, and FROM the clouds, the messengers of your perception return to you, assuring you that it is all THERE. Figures stand out and move about, actions seem real, and forms appear and shift from loveliness to the grotesque. And back and forth they go, as long as you would play the game of children's "make believe." Yet, however long you play it, and regardless of how much imagination you bring to it, you do NOT confuse it with the world below, nor seek to make it real.

T18J9

So should it be with the dark clouds of guilt, no more impenetrable and no more substantial. You will NOT bruise yourself against them, in traveling through. Let your Guide TEACH you their UNsubstantial nature, as He leads you PAST them. For BENEATH them is a world of light, whereon they cast no shadows. Their shadows lie upon the world BEYOND them, still FURTHER from the light. But from them TO the light, their shadows CANNOT fall. This world of light, this circle of brightness, is the real world, where guilt meets with forgiveness. Here, the world OUTSIDE is seen anew, WITHOUT the shadow of guilt upon it.

T18J10

Here are YOU forgiven, for here you have forgiven everyone. Here is the new perception, where everything is bright and shining with innocence, washed in the waters of forgiveness, and cleansed of every evil thought you laid upon it. Here there is no attack upon the Son of God, and YOU are welcome. Here is your innocence, waiting to clothe you and protect you, and make you ready for the final step in the journey inward. Here are the dark and heavy garments of guilt laid by, and gently replaced by purity and joy.

T18J11

Yet even forgiveness is not the end. Forgiveness DOES make lovely, but it does NOT create. It IS the source of healing, but it is the MESSENGER of love, and not its Source. Here you are led, that God Himself can take the final step unhindered. For here does nothing INTERFERE with love, letting it be Itself. A step BEYOND this holy place of forgiveness. A step still further inward, but one you CANNOT take, transports you to something COMPLETELY different. Here is the Source of light; nothing perceived, forgiven, nor transformed. But merely KNOWN.

The interesting thing about all blocks to awareness, is that there is always love behind them. The block is there to hide the love. The block also makes it seem like the love is not there. But if you were to remove the block, you would return to the awareness of love's presence, which has been there all along. This is why behind every grievance there is a miracle of love.

"The miracle behind this grievance will resolve it for me."

"The answer to this problem is the miracle which it conceals."

We began in love and we love everyone and everything. But then along comes ego stuff, grievances, hates, judgements, blame, anger, fear, guilt, sinfulness, darkness, to blot out the love and cover it up. But we truly do simply "cover it over" with a layer of untruth, to disguise it and make it seem like it's not there.

This means that no matter who you seem to be angry towards, you actually do love them behind that anger. Behind all physical objects there is also love. Behind the body there is love. Behind all attacks and judgements you love the thing you are attacking and judging. Underneath your hatred there is love. And beyond every layer of self condemnation there is love. It's already there, because it's your love of God which nothing can remove.

The course says that grievances and miracles are opposite. That a grievance hides a miracle. And if you apply forgiveness to the grievance to undo it, you will become aware of the miracle instead. ie if you remove the block to love, the love is revealed. It's kind of like removing the clouds so that the sun can shine. The sun is always there behind the clouds.

It's not as if, when you're in a grievance, there is no love anywhere. It does seem that way because a grievance is a denial of love, it's an attack and a belief in sin. Every grievance attacks love and attacks God and the sonship. But it does this only in an attempt to make it go away, which ultimately is a form of denial. You can't make love go away because love is permanent. All you can do in truth is hide it from your awareness and pretend it's not there. Like burying your head in the sand.

If you can remember that behind every grievance there is a miracle of love, then you know that the purpose of every grievance is to hide the love. And that means every grievance implies there is love there, a love which you're trying to use the grievance to hide. The grievance is serving a purpose of avoiding the truth. Admitting to the truth and waking up to reality exposes you to love again.

To do that you need to recognize the attack is there to serve a purpose. You aren't just attacking for no reason, or even just because you want to get rid of your sin and guilt. You're doing it to achieve a goal of keeping God away. Every attack upon yourself and every projected attack upon others, is only there to serve the goal of separation from God. You use it for that reason alone. You want to keep the separation going so that you will not be exposed to love.

"Projection will ALWAYS hurt you. It reinforces your belief in your own split mind, and its ONLY purpose is to KEEP THE SEPARATION GOING."

The removal of the blocks to love's presence, is merely the removal of all attempts to attack. Attack is sin, and also insanity. You can only attack yourself, so each time you are attacking you are trying to hurt yourself. Doing that hides your awareness from love, and is really the purpose of the attack. The aim of all attack is to resist the truth, to shut God out, to hide from reality, and to assert that you are not immortal. But without attack, only the truth of love remains.

"I cannot see in darkness but in light"

"God is the light in which I see."

"Eternity will shine away the world."

"The world will disappear in light."

In ACIM there is a theme of the relationship of light and dark. We're simply told light dispels darkness, and that really there is no such thing as darkness. Darkness is a label for the illusion of a "lack of light". Essentially this means there is either light or a lack of light, and darkness isn't "a real thing". It's similar to saying there is love or a lack of love, but there isn't real evil. This is forgiving because it recognizes either love or a call for love and doesn't regard the "lack of love" as a state that's real or "actually evil."

That said, when we dreamed of death and made a world, which includes Earth, and all bodies, we made these things by pretending there is a lack of light. And this absence of light seems to show up as darkness, as if to say it is "made of darkness". As soon as you switch from realizing there is only light or its lack, to believing that the lack of light is itself something which can CAUSE light to go away, you start to believe that the darkness is real and that "darkness can hide." It's the belief that darkness has power, is evil, is real, and is capable of forcing light to be dispelled. It's nothing other than the mistaken belief in sin - a dark thought being able to attack the light of God. It's a level confused idea.

In truth, since there is only light or its illusion of absence, when light is supplied, the illusion of the lack of light disappears. Miracles supply a lack. Once the "lack of light" is overcome by supplying the light, and the light is present, there simply is no lack of light any more and so "the darkness" simply vanishes. In the presence of light there is no darkness. That which seemed to be "made of darkness" is really just light's seeming absence, and now that light has arrived, that which was "made of darkness" must be shone away and disappear. It really was only an illusion of darkness seeming to exist, when in fact it was nothing. Darkness isn't real.

For example, when clouds block the sun from shining, and the sun is still shining beyond the clouds, the underside of the clouds seem to become dark because it now seems as if the clouds have the power to block the light. The clouds are symbolic of the idea that darkness has power over the light and can prevent light from extending. Blocks to awareness do the same thing. But the fact is that the clouds only become dark because of the seeming illusion of an absence of light, not because clouds are inherently dark. They are made of transparent water. When light shines upon them, they are not dark at all. They are seen IN the light WITH light and this light thus dispels the belief that "the clouds are dark". Darkness is an illusion.

Similarly with shadows, a shadow is merely the illusion of an absence of light. When light shines onto the area which was "in shadow", the shadow disappears. Light always has power over darkness EVEN in this dream world. Whenever the light comes, darkness simply vanishes and whatever evil figures seemed to be made of darkness, absolutely cease to be. It has no protest, it has no power, it has no way to prevent itself from being shone away. Darkness has no defense against the light. It simply disappears because it wasn't really a thing in its own right, it was just the absence of light. Once the absence of God is supplied, once love is given to those who lack the love, the absence of love is restored to love and all seeming illusions and manifestations of darkness simply disappear. Light corrects the darkness by showing that there is no darkness, just as atonement shows there is no sin.

Light has power over darkness because there is no REAL opposite to light. Darkness is not reality. Light is reality. Darkness, as the opposite to light, is just an illusion of darkness and so the light always has power over it. Light is permanently true and unchangeable. Darkness is a temporary illusion that what is permanent is not permanent. Darkness is a lie, a deception. It doesn't really exist.

The world, which we made, with bodies, are all made out of darkness. They are the "absence of light" attempting to be maintained by minds that are trying to believe light is not present. And so they are trying withhold their light in order to stop the shining in order to make it seem like there is a "hole" in the light where light has become absent, where heaven has turned into hell. And then it becomes easy to believe, the seeming lack of light - which is showing up as darkness - is actually a "real darkness", as if the darkness itself is a thing in its own right, with a power and a will and a causality and capable of causing light to go away. Like since when did darkness ever have the ability to resist light? But while we believe there is a world here, we are believing that darkness has power over light. We're looking at nothing but an illusion of light's seeming absence, not real darkness. When light is allowed to shine and enter, light's absence is corrected and there is now no darkness for the world to be made of.

Given also that the world and bodies are all "made of darkness" or are the illusion of light's absence, when the light comes, those things will be shone away. When we are no longer interested in making illusions or playing with this idea that we can cause the light to be harmed or affected and caused to leave by our dark powers, we will simply allow light to shine and it WILL shine away the world and the body. They must be shone away because they are ONLY the illusion of the absence of light. When the light comes, the world has to disappear. All shadows must disappear. The body must disappear. They cannot coexist with the light because they are founded entirely on light's absence. Any more than the ego, which is darkness, can go into the light and keep its darkness. This is why that which is "made of darkness" cannot enter the light or have any ability to attack God's Kingdom.

This is also why "a forgiven world cannot last." If you forgive the world you are shining a light ONTO the world, illuminating it, and thereby SHINING IT AWAY, because it is made of light's absence and when the light comes the absence is corrected and undone, light replaces darkness, and so the world which was the illusion of light being absent, is shone away and undone. This is why ACIM says that "the world will disappear in light" and "the world will spin into the nothingness from which it came". You cannot forgive a world, shine light onto it, see it in light, and expect it to stay IF it is not made of light. And this world, Earth, is not made of light - it is the idea of sin which is the idea of darkness being able to hide or block the light of Heaven. As soon as there is light, there is no world. This is also why there are no worlds or bodies in Heaven - darkness does not exist there and these things are completely "made of" darkness. The illusion that there is no light. They were made to block the light. They cannot enter or be in the light and maintain their state of darkness, thus they cannot exist at all.

This is why eternity will eventually shine away the world. The world, its forms, its bodies, which are all lack of light, will become filled with light so much that the light will dispel the lack of light, and so all of the forms will be shone away entirely. They will leave absolutely no trace in their going because they were always illusions of darkness or light's absence. Temporarily, the world may seem to become a shining reflection of Heaven or to be so filled with light ("I am the light of the world") that it seems heaven-like... but only temporarily, in a transition from dark to light, because when enough light has shone upon it, it will be so infused with light its darkness simply MUST vanish. When the light becomes brilliant, intense, powerful and full, there is nowhere for darkness to exist or hide, and all things "made of darkness" will vanish as if they never existed. The world will be healed away.

So long as forms and objects are maintained, there is a protest against light and an attempt to block it. Physical objects are blocks to the light just as they are blocks to awareness. They are made of the idea of sin, the suggestion that darkness can block the light and have power over the light. This is why "to see a sinless body is impossible" - you cannot look upon sin unless you are sinful and when you are purely innocent you can see nothing but light. And this is why you cannot truly be 100% in the light of heaven, while having a body.

The light (of the great rays for example) will literally fill the void where the body was pretending to exist, and replace it, filling up the gap with light, since the body is nothing but the illusion that there is a lack of light or a block to light. The body is what a lack of light "looks like", something dark and an obstacle to light seemingly capable of obscuring it. And since the body blocks light, it also blocks the mind and awareness of truth and atonement. "The body is a limit" "The body cannot stay." So long as the body is present at all, it is blocking light or demonstrating that darkness still exists.

There are no obstacles to light in the living world of light, which is Heaven. There are no bodies, forms, objects, walls, or anything that can keep light from being absolutely infinite and intensely brilliant everywhere. There is nowhere "lacking light" for the body to seem to exist. There is only light everywhere.

"Nothing there but shines and shines forever."

"Only the creations of light are real."

A Course in Miracles - Urtext material - reproduced with permission from the Foundation for Inner Peace (acim.org), and the Foundation for A Course in Miracles (facim.org).
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