You might be angry with someone, you might be upset and annoyed about what they're doing or how they're treating you or others, but here's the secret.

There is no such thing as genuine anger.

Anger always has a secret motive of USING the other person to get rid of YOUR own sin and guilt. Always.

It's very convenient that anger comes across as though you are justified, outraged, offended, annoyed, as though it's entirely someone else who is wrong and not you.

And even in the midst of that anger or upset you will feel all hurt and victimized and unfairly treated, making it seem like this experience is something you totally do not want and have not asked for. You even think you want to get rid of the anger and make it go away. Except you don't.

It serves your secret plan to get rid of your deeper sin, which you've made unconscious to yourself.

You might complain, you might blame, but you're getting a huge benefit by maintaining this state of anger and upset.

You WANT other people to attack you, you WANT other people to hurt you, and you WANT them to do things to you so that you will have a great opportunity to find them guilty.

You'll then jump at the chance to accuse them, regardless of how upset you are or how much you perceive that you don't want this to be happening. You DO want it to be happening.

You are using other people to hurt you so that you can get revenge and get rid of your own sin. You're trying to make them wrong, think of them as the one who is wrong or bad, so that you have this opportunity.

So in your anger, it might seem as though you're upset because of what they are doing to YOU. But what about what you are doing to THEM?

Your desire to see them as wrong is an attack. Your desire to find them guilty is an attack. Your desire to pin the blame on them is an attack. This hardly justifies your innocence.

No-one else is ever the real cause of your upset. No-one else ever attacks you or makes you experience effects. No-one else puts the effects into you or into your body. No-one can do anything to you but your own mind.

You have to own up to this and admit that YOU believe you are sinful and guilty, regardless of whether other people seem to be accusing you. YOU believe it. And you need to undo that belief (go to the Atonement) if you are to be at peace.

Then having forgiven yourself for what you did not REALLY do (sin is not real), you'll be able to recognize that this other person was innocent all along, they were COMPLETELY uninvolved in what you were experiencing. They didn't cause any of it. You were just using them and doing it to yourself.

There are a set of steps by which your own sin comes to find itself inside of your brother.

1) Believe you are sinful (oops, are you sure?)

2) Grab ahold of that sin

3) Hand it over to your brother and shove it down his throat (project)

4) Disassociate yourself from it and wash your hands of it

5) Put on your 'happy face' and pretend you are innocent

6) Point a finger at the sin, which is now in your brother

7) Accuse your brother's sin of being evil, and attack it

You then see sin in your brother and seemingly 'not' in yourself, because your mask of pretend innocence HIDES the fact that the sin is still in you and never left. The face of innocence covers up your guilt and makes everyone believe you didn't do it.

The one left holding the baby is then your brother in whom you see your projected sin, and you attack him for it, to make sure it stays well away from you.

At the same time, you are then terried that your own sin, which you got rid of, might come back to haunt you. You start to suspect it's going to attack you, find you, hunt you down and enact itself upon you again.

As this is playing out, it seems to transpire that 'the sin' does indeed come back to attack you, manifested in forms of punishment and victimhood, seemingly done 'by' the person in whom you shoved your sin, and now you get to claim:

"I am an innocent victim, I did not ask for this, they are attacking me without my will, the sin is in them, look look I can see the sin in them, it's all their fault".

Well, pretty convenient, to keep up this charade, given that it conceals the sin in you, within your own mind, and puts on a show that you are not sinful at all. You're trying to convince yourself and everyone around you that you do not believe you are the sinner, all the while keeping your sin hidden in the shadows of your mind underneath your blanket of fake innocence.

Now, to reverse this is going to mean, you have to take off the fake mask of innocence, you are going to have to stop being a victim, AND - horror of all horrors - you are going to have to TAKE BACK the sin that you shoved into your brother. It's yours, anyway. You have to separate your brother from your sin, i.e. from the guilt. You have to find a way to see them as innocent and as not `owning` the sin. It's not theirs. They are not sinful.

But you don't really want to do this because if you take back your sin, lo and behold, your mask of innocence (which was a total farce) has to be taken off of yourself, and you have to come face to face again with the sin being IN YOU. You do not like the sin being in you, that's why you tried to get rid of it in the first place.

So why would anyone 'seemingly' in their right mind want to take off their lovely sheen of innocence and own up to being a sinner? It's not exactly an attractive offer.

However, until you do this you have no chance to really heal it. And there is a healing option. If you take it quickly to Holy Spirit and let Him decide whether it's true or not, he will guarantee to find you ALWAYS innocent. It's pretty easy, but you have to be open minded about ACCEPTING that it's true that you're innocent.

There is a way out of hell.

The Holy Spirit is a SPIRIT.

He is not a metaphor. He is not an idea. He is not a convenient concept.

He is called the Holy SPIRIT, because he is a SPIRIT.

He is part of the Sonship. He has been created FULLY by God to be PERMANENT.

The Holy Spirit is ALIVE. He has a mind. He can think. He can love. He can heal.

The Holy Spirit is the mechanism of miracles. The Holy Spirit can PERFORM MIRACLES.

If you are afraid of Spirit, if you are afraid of the power of the mind, you might not like the idea that Holy Spirit is a Spirit.

He knows everything about you and about God.

He shares the Power and Will of God. There is nothing he cannot do. Just as there is nothing YOUR holiness cannot do.

He is not merely some aspect of your mind, or some metaphor for a "memory of God" or some little bit of "yourself" that happens to remain sane.

He is a BEING OF LIGHT.

He speaks for God because He has been created whole and perfect. He is fixated on God and cannot lose sight of Christ.

The Holy Spirit loves to look upon, and is always aware of Christ, at all times.

The Holy Spirit is the highest communication medium, a perfect "channel" for God. He is UNLIMITED.

Many people think that healing is all to do with fixing your mind and learning the truth.

How about letting the Holy Spirit supernaturally heal you? Is that scary?

How about inviting Him into your mind and body to literally "undo the consequences of your wrong decision". If you will let Him, He CAN and WILL come in and heal your symptoms and problems.

A Course in Miracles is not supposed to be a purely mental exercise. God created the Angels and the Holy Spirit to help you. You could really use their help. You need only be WILLING to ask for and receive it.

You do not have to do all of this on your own. Mighty Companions ACTUALLY can help you. This isn’t all about the ego "doing the course" in isolation. We are too used to being isolated.

Let God and His Creations help you, heal you, undo your symptoms, correct your errors and bring you peace.

I often fall for the trap of trying to be right. After of a period of time of trying to be right over and over again, I noticed that this rightness was basically a position of defensiveness, trying to defend (and therefore attack) against some kind of perceived 'wrongness' outside of me.

The trouble is that the wrongness is not really outside of me, it's a part of my mind, but the rest of my mindbelieves it is separate from it - disassociated from it. So really when I'm being right, I'm going into my persona and am rejecting my shadow, projecting it onto someone else and trying to position my persona-identified self as more correct, more truthful, more real.

This is a position of war, because always these situations of being right involve conflict - seemingly with someone else, but really with some part of myself. So long as someone else seems to be the opposite of my position, it becomes very easy to see my wrong-focused shadow projected onto them. It's a convenient way to get rid of my own wrongness and guilt.

So even if I seem very annoyed about someone being wrong, and I'm going to lengths to correct them or prove myself right, I secretly want them to be wrong so that I can put all of this sense of wrongfulness onto them, finding myself seemingly more innocent as a result. I get to look like the innocent victim who is just defending the truth, and they get to look like the evil monster who is hell-bent on destroying it.

This is all happening inside our own mind when we start to dig in our heels and be right. And the thing is, in this world there are many many situations in which, according to normal rules and laws and seeming "facts" (really illusions of truth), we can fall for this and believe that someone is "really wrong". We think there is a truth to the illusion that they are wrong, and react to it with righteousness in trying to separate ourselves from this perceived untruth. But separation itself is untruth.

We have to learn then to allow others to seem to be wrong, if they seem to be, recognizing it's not that they really are wrong, but only an illusion that they are, and that if we just react to that with ego we will just move into the persona and project our shadow guilt onto them. We need to let them be wrong, if they seem to be, and choose not to rise up in this mode of holier-than-thou, or the one who is good and righteous and correct. One person being wrong and one person being right is just an inner war, in which there is no peace.

Learning not to go into this mode of projection and wrong-making when, given the situation, it seems that you *actually* are correct, is a very subtle trap. It's easy to recognize you are being right when the other person is actually right and you're actually mistaken, on whatever ego grounds. But when the other person *seem* to be wrong, given the facts and so on, this makes it much harder to drop the 'role' of being the 'right one', or falling for the temptation of believing that something "really wrong" is happening outside of you.

Even when we are technically right, correct, or know a greater truth, we have to learn to surrender and not use it as a way to judge or to make others wrong for not seeing it. It's quite a subtle trap, and I fall for it all the time, lol. What ends up happening is I am defending the ego in me, thinking that I am defending some kind of truth, and only make myself be in conflict.

I can choose peace instead of this. I'd rather be happy than right.

Someone in your life that you are angry with or upset about, is only there as a skapegoat so that you can cover up your secret plan.

Your secret plan is to find a way to prove why God can't love you.

So you hire people, even before you incarnate, and you ask them to do stuff to you, for you. You ask them to play a role. And then they come into life and you come into life and you both play the roles perfectly. They do you a great service, even if the role they play is one of attacker or victimizer or hater or abuser.

While you have forgotten this sense of responsibility for orchestrating everything that happens to you, you will experience yourself being a victim - unfairly treated. Only by remembering 100% responsibility for this 'deal' you made, can you be freed from this victim consciousness.

Then, whatever that attacking person looked like or what they did to you, IF it's recognized as being EXACTLY what you asked them to do FOR you, then you can hardly hold them accountable or blame them. You literally asked for it. And whatever they did was done perfectly exactly as you requested. This completely lets them off the hook. They are just doing their job. You should be grateful.

Only in seeing it this way can you view the person as completely devoid of any guilt or of having done something against your will. And if they haven't done anything against your will other than perfectly carry out YOUR plan of self-attack, then you will recognize they have not really done anything TO you. It's really you that did this to you by hiring them to do it for you in the first place.

Then you can recognize this person is innocent. They have been faithful to your request. They've done what you asked. And they did not do anything you didn't ask for. So now services have been rendered. And for that you are grateful and you can recognize them as INNOCENT. No longer can you blame them for doing something 'uncalled for', having owned up to being the one who chose it.

Having thus taken back responsibility and power for the decisions against yourself, which were designed to give you really good justifications for being UNLOVABLE BY GOD, you will recognize that the whole point of being attacked/abused/hurt etc is so you will become so preoccupied with how worthless it 'makes you' that you will not be able to accept God's love. You will have really great justifications for why you can't be loved. And you'll have all this evidence and you'll be able to point your finger at this person and blame them for causing it. And all the while this affirms - God can't love me because I'm not lovable because of what this person did.

It's pretty convenient to stay in that mindset. And staying there won't make you happy. What will make you happy is dropping all the projection of blame onto the person who served you, taking full responsibility for orchestrating your life's events, taking ownership of the plan to prove to God that you're unworthy, and then becoming willing to allow yourself to be loved again. You have to drop the game you're playing. You have to get out from under the 'prison sentence' that the victimizer seems to hold you under. It's you holding yourself there so that you can stay way from God.

Then you let God in. You surrender. You drop the self-defeating attitude. You own up and admit to the truth. And then a smile can return to your face as you allow yourself to stop hating yourself and let yourself be loved by God.

The secret of salvation tells us that we are doing everything to ourselves, but this is often used only to try to "re-frame" the stuff we thought other people were doing to us. If we open it up, there's a bigger picture here.

It's really actually about our RELATIONSHIP with God and with ourselves and our brothers.

We need to first be clear God is always loving. He does not attack, hurt, damage, threaten, reject, abandon, inflict pain and sickness and death, make anyone afraid, nor does he produce any form of unhappiness. He is continually constantly perfect and holy and innocent and pure and kind.

With that in mind, look then at what you are experiencing in your RELATIONSHIP with God. It is easy in ego to believe that God has abandoned you, God is a dangerous threat, God is out to kill you, God wants revenge etc, because the ego has misinterpreted God and tried to turn him into an evil monster.

The reason for that is that if you can make out that God is the one who DID SIN, and who is responsible for making hell, then you can disown it and hide the fact that He absolutely DID NOT do that. He becomes a convenient scapegoat and decoy to disguise your own sinfulness.

So if we recognize what God really is like, and realize He cannot possibly be the one making our lives hell, upsetting us, making us suffer, etc.... then it must be us. And this is a turning point because now you start to own up to the fact that YOU are the one making your life a living hell.

It's really you that tried to abandon and reject God. It's you that tried to sin against Him. It's you that left Heaven. It's you that threw away everything He gave you. It's you that turned away and sought something more. It's you that is actively pushing Him away. Jesus also says "You attack the real world every second of every day."

Indeed we made an entire world as an attack on God. This world was made as a defense AGAINST God, to shut him out and thus sever our relationship with Him. To hide in form and bodies trying to disguise who and what we are, so that He isn't part of our lives any more. Like holding a major grudge, we wanted nothing to do with Him. We wanted him dead.

It wasn't God that did this. God didn't make an attack planet. He does not attack us WITH the planet or WITH bodies or through sickness and suffering. He is not responsible for wars and murders and all manner of vile things. It's not even remotely His doing at all. God CANNOT do these things, He is utterly incapable of sin, and would never EVER attack you. You are part of Him, and He would be insane if He were to attack Himself.

So you then realize, as clearly as possible, that YOU are the one who has "done this to yourself". You have been hiding from God, rejecting God, abandoning God, attacking God, resisting God, not wanting God, fearing God, trying to make God sick and dead, speaking against God, and trying to live without God. That's your doing, not His, and it's not His will for you.

When you can own that, you can also then decide to choose again. And this is the major theme in the course. You can make a different decision and always be free and capable of returning to a loving relationship with God, in which you share everything and are fully open to Him being in you and with you. God wants that, because from His perspective, He has done nothing but continually love you. And it's just you who has been bearing completely unfounded grudges against Him.

This is why in a sense you need to "forgive God" of what you think He is responsible for, or what you think He "did" (sin), recognizing that He DID NOT do that, and HE is still innocent. But you have to go even further to then also forgive yourself. It's not enough JUST to recognize that God isn't the guilty party. You MUST also undo your own guilt and belief in real sin, that "you really did it, not God."

God knows you have not actually really done anything sinful at all. You have never attacked Him, hurt Him, damaged Him, upset Him, threatened Him, made Him sick or dead, or indeed affected or changed Him even in the tiniest of ways. And the whole authority problem was your attempt to believe you could, or had. Yet you cannot change God, period. Ever. And He still loves you. For-ever.

So His INVITATION, through the Holy Spirit, the "call to return", is merely asking you to come to your senses and accept the truth instead of what you THINK you did to God. Recognize how HE sees you. Recognize and reclaim your innocence. Laugh at the idea that you could ever sin. And thus return to relating TO Him from the same love that He relates to you.

This is what the journey Home is all about. Repairing your sense of a broken relationship with God, and thus with your Self, and with your Divine Brothers. Developing TRUST in Him again, as someone you can have a meaningful and SAFE relationship with. Opening up to re-discovering what He is really LIKE. Opening yourself to RECEIVE every gift that you temporarily shelved, including miracles.

It's a relief to really recognize that the only thing coming between you and God, between you and total happiness and peace and love, is the "hurt relationship" stuff BETWEEN you, that YOU put in place, and YOU can undo. Really, even if you ignore having to deal with other people, or with the body, or the world, the SOLE (soul) issue is your connection with God. First and foremost. And if you seek first the Kingdom of God, the way is made straight. All other relationships will fall into place when you get yourself "right with God."

Love God again. Job done.

Those who are angry about what other people have said or done, AGREE with what the person has said or done. I BET YOU DON'T LIKE TO HEAR THAT! lolol

This applies no matter the topic, whether it's being angry at politicians or angry at the government or angry at neighbors or coworkers or people of a certain religion or because of how certain other people are treating certain other people. It doesn't matter.

If you're angry at someone, YOU AGREE WITH THEM.

If you did not agree with them, you would maintain perfectly calm, perfectly poised. You would be unshaken. You would not move. You would have CERTAINTY. You would be confident. You wouldn't be moved in your viewpoint just because of what someone said or did. You would not lose your center. You would KNOW YOURSELF and anything going against that you're RECOGNIZE as false.

When you know yourself, you are acknowledging that you have not changed and you cannot BE changed, by anyone or anything. Another way of saying that is, you recognize you cannot be and are not a victim. You can't be influenced. You can't be damaged. You can't be vulnerable. And you can't be made to become pissed off at someone or something going on outside of you. But if you don't recognize that what's false is false, and you believe instead that it's TRUE, you WILL be upset by it, and it WILL disturb your peace, and it WILL be because you AGREE WITH IT. Whatever is true to you, you agree with, even if it is not really true.

He who gets wound up and angry and reacts really quickly in a rage obviously is deeply HURT by what someone says or does, but the truth is, this hurt is only experienced because the person has touched upon a hurt - a sensitivity or 'psychological bruise' that already exists in then. It triggers an old memory of when someone did this before. It brings up old feelings. It attacks the sense of ego self which is composed of guilt and made from beliefs, formed perhaps decades before, from previous hurtful experiences.

If someone says or does something and I become upset in any way, it's because I believe it's true. I might express that I don't WANT to believe it's true, and I may try to DENY that I believe it's true, and I may project ownership or responsibility for the belief into the attacking person, BUT... it's ALL MY OWN STUFF. If I am upset due to someone's expression, *I* have a problem, and I had that problem before that person even appeared. I don't want to ADMIT that I agree with them, but somewhere deep down inside, I am only upset because they remind me of what I think is true about myself.

Those who are angry and upset have the hardest time admitting that they actually, deep down, believe what the person is saying. And that's largely because anger is a very strong force of projection which hurls inner guilt outward and then attacks it to try to get rid of it. It's then extremely CONVENIENT to blame the whole thing on the person who seemed to trigger this response. But if I'm upset, it's because *I* BELIEVE* that what's happened is the TRUTH. I cannot be upset by what is false if I know it is false. Truth is STRENGTH.

So today, as I'm upset and angry about certain people and things that happened, I have to admit... I must believe they're telling the truth, somehow, in some way. Somewhere inside they've tapped into some old pain that I haven't healed. And in that way, they're actually trying to POINT IT OUT so that I will heal it. So then, for that service, I should be GRATEFUL to them for bringing this to my attention. But while I'm stuck in blame and "you made me upset" and "you did this to me"... I won't own up to the real truth here.... I actually deep down believe they're telling the truth, otherwise what would my reaction be?

I'D LAUGH MY HEAD OFF AT THE RIDICULOUSNESS!

If I KNEW their expression is false and I DON'T BELIEVE IT'S TRUE, I will stay in light and joy and just laugh and not perceive myself attacked or harmed in any way. Being aware of the truth reveals the ridiculous unbelievability of lies and illusions. If I forget to laugh, however, I will enter into self-attack and then blame it on everyone else, having first hurt myself with my own condemnation. If I've lost track of what is REALLY TRUE, and I think other stuff is true, I WILL be upset by it whenever someone says "this is true" and it resonates to what I secretly believe about myself. I MUST forgive all of my mistaken perceptions and allegiances to what is false if I am to regain inner peace.

So where are you at today? Did someone push your buttons? Why do you even have buttons? Who put the buttons there to begin with? When will you admit to believing in these buttons? And when will you be willing to let God heal them for you?

Ego projections boil down to a very, very simple dynamic.

1) I decide what I want to see in someone.

2) I interact with what I now see in them as if I did not put it there.

The way I interact with what I see in others, is quite bizarre. It's really insane. I'm trying to accomplish two opposite goals at once.

1) I want other people to be what I say they are, by projecting my sin and guilt onto them, "convinced" that they really are that way.

2) I then demand that they stop being what I am seeing them being, and that they be the opposite, and that they are the one who has to choose differently. This is "forgiveness to destroy".

So right off the bat, this is a state of conflict. It's me who is seeing other people are doing "something wrong", and then it is me who is insisting that they change their behavior. So now I'm holding it against them when they don't change "for me". And they won't.

I'm literally demanding two separate outcomes simultaneously. I want people to be what I decide they are, and then I want them to not be what I've decided they are, simply because I'm in denial of being the one who has laid down the ground rules to begin with.

So I'm going around basically projecting shit onto people, deciding ok, you are doing this and that wrong and should be doing this and that instead. And then the rest of my "play" is to react to that accusation. It tends to go one of two ways.

1) They are wrong and they shouldn't be doing what they're doing so they are the ones who need to change, not me, and if they don't, I will victimize them. I will hold it against them.

2) They are wrong and they shouldn't be doing what they're doing, but in a hero savior role I will now swoop in and save them from "themselves", those sorry bastards, since they refuse to change themselves and seem 'helpless' and needy.

Each time I react to something being incorrect or unacceptable in another, who exactly is it who has made that person out to be wrong in this way? Are they inherently wrong in this way or have I actually decided to see them this way, and therefore it's my judgement of them? And now that I am responsible for what I'm seeing, having put it there to see, it's now my responsibility to admit that I'm interacting with my own projection.

As Jesus says in the course, generally speaking we will project our own sin outward and try to disown it (disassociate) and then we will attack what we've projected, accusing it of being sinful and bad, in order to create a sense of separation between it and ourselves, so that we can keep it away from our identity.

We will attack our own sin, thinking that we're attacking it in another person, believing that to do so causes them to receive the punishment and not us. Except it doesn't work because the sin never leaves our own mind (ideas leave not their source), it just seems external because we are in denial of it.

So it really all boils down to this. Whatever interaction I seem to be having with "the world", if I don't like it, it's because I'm the one who is deciding on what I am seeing "in" it, and am reacting to it as though it's really out there. And regardless of whether I am liking to do that or am feeling frustrated or upset or whatever about "what they are doing", I am the one who is making them out to be doing that to me. Because I want to. Because it gives me an opportunity to disown some sin.

ie, I love to suffer. I choose suffering on purpose and position myself as a victim on purpose, so that I can seem to be at the effect of the world, so that I can then explain that the world has caused me and therefore the world is the sinner, not me. I might suffer and be sick or afraid or upset as "effects" of what they supposedly did to me (even though I invented those effects in myself, by myself), but I secretly am getting away with murder by "using" the person as an outlet for projecting my own sin. Now they are the sinner and not me, and I'm suffering... poor me, but at least I am not the sinner any more.

So the ego's mantra is, I wish to suffer in order not to suffer. Or rather, I will see the world as attacking me and attack myself with it so that it seems that I'm not attacking myself with it.

We are to demonstrate that we cannot be hurt, or made sick, or caused to die, as a result of this world. And whenever these things seem to be happening, you can be assured that you've positioned yourself as a deliberate victim, in order to pretend that the world is responsible for what you are experiencing. You may be suffering, you may be sick, you may even end up dead, and it will conveniently seem as if the world made this happen against your will, but nothing could be further from the truth.

No-one dies without their own consent. And anyone who dies has secretly arranged to make it appears as if they did not choose it at all. Death is an attempt not to choose, by pretending that you have no choice, by pretending that others have taken all your power away from you, making you an "unwilling" victim, in a state of unwillingness, such that it appears death happens to you against your will. How convenient. It's a total lie.

Death is unwillingness to admit that you are pretending to die and are blaming everything on anyone other than yourself. This is why death is failure, and death is failing to wake up from the dream. Death is impossible for anyone but self-imposed victims. Death is not life. It is not success or graduation. It is the total opposite of life. It cannot happen without being severely against yourself and against the will of God. Therefore it cannot happen "peacefully" nor can it happen AT ALL unless you attack yourself.

You are attacking victims with your false empathy. It's time for some honesty.

When you see someone as a victim, such as that they are sick, diseased, suffering, afraid, being victimized by someone else, are disabled, weak, helpless, vulnerable, at a loss, unhappy etc... you might take the position of caring, wanting to help them, saving them, being their hero, or wanting their suffering to stop.

The desire to want their suffering to stop can become very strong. It seems justified. It seems like you care a lot about what they're going through and want all this stuff to stop happening to them. It seems like you want to take it away and that you would if you could. But this is completely fake.

Every time you perceive someone as anything other than perfect love, it is an ego attack and you are using them as a scapegoat to get rid of your sin.

It can seem like your reaction to their victimhood is justified. It can seem like you really want to help them and take away their pain. However, what you're not admitting is that you have a secret benefit from seeing them this way, and you positioning yourself as their savior is actually a cover-up for how you are using them for your diabolical plan.

Even if you are coming across as caring and wanting them to stop suffering, you actually deep down want them to keep suffering. You want their pain to continue. You want to keep seeing them as a victim, and to keep pretending that you are their savior and not in any way someone who would be hurting them further. You would seem shocked and horrified at the suggestion that you are attacking them with your attempt at salvation.

Secretly, you have a belief that you sinned, and hold a lot of guilt to go along with it. You want to get rid of it and deny it's you who did it. Along comes a nice victim which someone or something else has set up to be in a state of suffering and punishment.

Fortunately for you, they are already appearing to be punished by causes outside of you, so you don't have any need to attack them overtly. You don't need to turn them into a victim because they are already being one. How convenient! Now all you have to do is take the opportunity of their victimhood to keep them being a victim, so that you can use them to scapegoat your sin.

Therefore instead of reacting with justified anger, as though they attacked you and you need to now establish them as the one who is wrong, you've already seen that they appear to be wrong already. So all that's left is to keep them in their suffering while making it look like you are here to save them from it.

Your perception of them as a victim IS an attack, but it seems to be an invisible attack because its effects are already implemented by circumstances. By making their EXISTING victimhood real, you get to appear as though you were not the one who did this to them, even though your AGREEING with it is just as much an attack - a veiled attack, which seems like it isn't even happening. You join in the attack by agreeing that they are a victim. Then you react instead with false empathy, a false attitude of caring and wanting them to be better.

Your desire to want them to be better, while still perceiving that their victimhood is real, is actually a choice to perceive them as wrong for being the way they are. You think they should not be being victimized, they should not be suffering, they should not be sick, that it's unfair that they've been mistreated, and you just want to "help" the poor fuckers get out of their situation.

But you don't. Your belief that they should NOT be being real victims is actually an attack. You're trying to deny them and get rid of them. You can't accept them the way they are. You will position yourself as the innocent hero who comes to save them, while secretly using them to prove that THEY are the one who is a sinner and not you.

Even though you might label a victim in such a way as to frame them as guiltless and sinless, as though innocent and not wanting their situation, by making their victimhood real and reacting to it with false empathy or false compassion, you are actually condemning them.

Your ego really wants them to stay being the one who is sick, to keep suffering, to maintain their diseases and their strife, because if they were to genuinely stop being a victim you wouldn't have a way to get rid of your unconscious sin and guilt.

So long as you can see them as a victim and pretend to care, you can enjoy a secret gladness that they are the one who is worse off and not you. "There but for the grace of God go I" - or rather, "I'm glad those fuckers are suffering because they must be guilty and not me." They are the one who must have sinned, in order to suffer, and you are clearly the one who didn't.

Even if you go to great lengths to help them and want to alleviate their situation, you're really doing so on false grounds. You do not recognize that they have attacked themselves. You do not recognize that they have chosen to suffer. You do not recognize that they want to be a victim. You don't see the ways that they are being vicious and attacking and using their ego illusions of victimhood to accuse others of sin. You do not see this because you do not want to admit to doing the same.

Eventually, someone who becomes very "helpful" in this way is actually an under-cover attacker. A wolf in sheep's clothing. A devil appearing as an angel. Helping disempowers. Helping takes away, it does not give. Becoming a fixer, and becoming addicted to fixing, simply indicates that you want other people to be broken as much as possible so that you can remain in denial about your own brokenness.

If they are the one who needs the help, it's not you. If they are the victim, it's not you. If there is something "wrong with them", then you get to look all innocent and have an illusion of being "loving". Your seemingly sincere wish to take away all their suffering and pain is actually making it real and adding to it.

YOU are causing them to suffer more. That's hard to look at and admit to. Your ego WANTS them to suffer so that you can use them and make yourself look innocent. Every time you move into false empathy and set yourself up with an ego reaction of "oh poor them, they're so sad", you are attacking them and keeping them imprisoned. You're not shining truth onto them or really helping them. Your "help" is actually HURT.

To be truly helpful can only mean that you apply forgiveness. Whatever their victimhood appears to be, IT IS NOT THAT, and something else is going on, both with you and with them. There must be a lot of denial involved and there must be a lot of self attack involved. Victims are not victims. They choose to make themselves appear to have stuff happen to them "unfairly", tragically, awfully, so that their ego can get away with murder. Your belief that their victimhood is justified and unfair is you getting away with murder as well.

Only through a correction of your perception, which is going to require you to own up to what you are using this person for, and admitting to the truth of WHY you want them to suffer, i.e. to keep your own self-attack hidden behind denial, will you then have any hope of helping YOU, OR them. You can release them from their prison by NOT agreeing with their victimhood and NOT seeing them as suffering needlessly and NOT believing the appearance of the story as to how things are happening against their will. Behind every victim is Christ pretending to suffer.

False empathy is deceit. It is not justified. It is an ego reaction. It is a tool to get rid of your own sin. It does not work, because it keeps your own sin intact and creates more. Only forgiveness of yourself will work.

When you're having an emotional reaction to anything, you usually believe it's because something outside of you is causing it.

But more accurately, you previously created a self condemnation within yourself and this is rising to the surface of your awareness. It's like a bruise which it *seems* like someone else is activating or triggering.Its your guilt about separating from God - your sin.

Our reactions are often so quick to happen that it seems like someone or something outside of you 'causes' the feeling.

So I'm sitting here, and if someone comes along and pokes me with a stick, if I suddenly feel angry and annoyed, initially it might look like I've been made to feel this way BY that person. Or that I'm only feeling this way because of that person. Its an illusion of cause and effect.

But what's really happening is, my mind already contained guilt and anger and upset which was buried unconsciously, and being poked with the stick has somehow triggered it off, like a memory or an association, and its come up in my mind quickly and now I'm experiencing it. It's easy to bridge the gap and say, well this person has inflicted a 'fresh wound' upon me, but really it's something that was already in me.

Remember as ACIM says, "we but accuse our brother of our OWN sins." - meaning that our brother does not HAVE any sins that we can accuse them of - its all your own stuff that you project onto them.

The only reason we are here in bodies is because we tried to separate from God by condemning ourselves, attempting to destroy ourselves and to punish ourselves. WE are the ones who believe in our own sinfulness and our own guilt. It's got nothing to do with anyone else and nobody else put it there. And it is this inner self-guilt that becomes 'activated' in EVERY situation where we think someone or something else does 'something' to us to 'make us' unhappy. We simply 'recall' our own guilt and re-suffer.

So instead we hire people to come along and to seem like they are the cause of our suffering, because this triggers off our AGREEMENT that what they're insinuating about us is true (that we deserve punishment or mistreatment), even if we protest violently that this is uncalled for. We cannot get upset UNLESS we agree with the person, and we cannot get upset UNLESS we already believe deep down that we deserve this treatment.

Its not other people that take our power away. We are the ones who keep trying to GIVE it to other people, to give them our own self-responsibility in an attempt to ask them to take over the rights and responsibilities that WE have for ourselves and for our own feelings. We want someone else to be to blame for the separation from God because we have blamed ourselves heavily and can't bear the burden. But OUR suffering has NOTHING to do with anyone else.

So its extremely convenient when someone comes along and triggers you or pushes your buttons. And even though you will react in such a way as to suggest your entire reaction is their fault, or you were just sitting there innocently minding your own business, the fact is they would not be ABLE to upset you if you were truly free of your own guilt. So all they are really doing is helping you to become aware of what you are hiding from, and your hidden unconscious self-hate is actually calling for you to be punished, which is why you hire and attract people to do it to you, for you, even if you fight with them about it consciously.

Ok so, this is really all about taking responsibility for who you are and what you feel and what you believe is true about yourself. You need to learn to decouple and detach the lie, that how you feel is caused by someone else. How you feel is NEVER caused by someone else. Whoever is in your life that is pissing you off, ITS NOT THEM... its not their fault, they're just helping you to see that you pissed yourself off. You HAVE to stop blaming other people for what you are feeling. Fully. Totally. "You are never upset for the reason you think" and "anger is never justified" (ie blaming another).

I have been finding that I am so incredibly used to being a victim, that whenever someone does or says something to 'upset me', and I experience a reaction (which is really just my own self-attack surfacing in my awareness) I immediately add two-and-two together and find the other person to be 'guilty of' upsetting me. It seems like they caused the upset, and its all their fault. I actually buy into this really quickly. And it totally glosses over the fact that I am only experiencing what is already in me, what I already believe it true about myself, and I am only reminded of my own self condemnation.

So what I have to learn to do, which I am experimenting with now, is to remember to remind myself... "I am completely responsible for these feelings". Whatever my reaction is, I have to stop blaming the cause of it on other people. I have to stop seeing myself as having been at the 'effect' of anyone or anything other than myself. If anyone else has 'done this to me', then I am a victim. If I am a victim I can't find peace, no matter how much I protest. No matter what my feeling is, or how much it seems justified or unjustified, or how much it *seems* to have been activated by another person, I HAVE to get to where I admit honestly that EVEN THIS FEELING is not there 'because of' that other person, it's there because *I* put it there because its MY self-attack. "The secret to salvation is this - that you but did this to yourself."

To stop being a victim, or seeing yourself as victimized, you MUST own up to the fact that everything you are experiencing is YOURS. It is your own inner experience. It is not someone else's. It is not something that anyone else put there or created or caused or made happen or reinforced in any way. Its yours. This is your shit.

You have plenty of your own shit in your own mind which you put there to cover and explain absolutely all of your reactions and upset feelings and unhappiness, without needing even one other person to explain why you feel this way. You're doing a fine job of condemning yourself without needing to resort to trying to claim that someone else has 'added to' your load.

Nobody else has ever done anything to you. Period. Let that soak in for a minute. Nobody else has EVER done anything to you, and ALL of your reactions and feelings and experiences are INSIDE YOU, because you put them there. They're YOURS.

You are completely responsible for everything you experience and everything you feel and you are NOT at the effect of anyone else, ever.

Now, this is very tempting for the ego/hurt parts of yourself to want to skapegoat and this happens very rapidly and automatically when you are not being truly honest or observant. And you are so used to this happening that every single time someone or something outside of you 'goes wrong' or 'offends you' or 'attacks you' or 'does something to you' or whatever... you immediately launch into the mistaken perception that this OTHER has 'caused you'. Caused-you, in general... ie... they are the cause, you are their effect, you have no say in who you are, and you must change to match what they say you should be feeling. Victimhood.

So.... now your job is different. Your job is to notice whenever you are in the midst of an 'interaction' with someone or something, in which it has triggered off some feelings. Some upset. Some hurt or anger or whatever it is. If you are not happy, then chances are you are currently `holding a grievance` which you THINK is a grievance against someone else. You blame them for it.

BUT... your job now is this.... you MUST CLAIM OWNERSHIP of every part of what you are experiencing. All of your feelings of hurt, anger, rejection, pain, loss, suffering, sadness, offense, frustration, unfairness, etc... all of it... it is YOURS. It's inside you. And the ONLY reason you are experiencing it is BECAUSE YOU PUT IT THERE. We have to learn that it is NEVER about the other person, you are NEVER affected by someone else, you are NEVER at the effect of the world you see, you are NEVER experiencing something as the effect/result of someone or something else, and nobody has EVER done anything whatsoever to change who you are.

It's actually completely true that nobody has ever done anything to you. As in my quote yesterday - "you are completely harmless and you cannot be hurt." Only you can do this stuff to yourself. Only you can STOP doing this to yourself. This doesn't require a crazy mental somersault or perceptual trampolining in order to see it this way. It's actually the way it IS. You're just allowing yourself to acknowledge things for how they really ARE instead of making up the story that someone else is to blame.

When owned up to with responsibility, you have ONLY done this to yourself. Everyone else is innocent. You have never been hurt by anyone. You ARE immortal and invulnerable. Admitting to this and seeing this is simply the truth. There is no distortion in it and no fairytale needed to paint a picture to make it believable. The truth is that everything you're feeling, you are choosing to feel, on your own, without any help from anyone else.

As you learn to OWN what you are feeling, something really interesting happens. Or at least this is what I am finding. If someone does something that usually I'd say "they caused me to feel xyz"... if I say to myself, ok, I'm upset and feeling hurt and angry... but its NOT because of them... these are MY feelings, ALL of this experience is MINE and has nothing to do with them.... this ownership/responsibility does two things. 1) It completely detatches from the other person and withdraws all blame from them and correctly identifies WHERE the problem is (its in me, in my mind, not in the other person), and 2) It puts me in touch with what is MINE and who I AM.

What I'm finding is that as I own my feelings and stop blaming them on other people, ALL of them... I am owning up to being MYSELF. My 'personality' is coming out. I am feeling freer and happier. My unhappy feelings are dissolving away very quickly and I remain in the victim role for FAR less time. Taking this responsibility immediately detaches me from the other person, and severs the 'tie' that was trying to pin my feelings on someone else. The door is closed, and now I'm within myself. And as I sit with my own feelings in awareness that these are MY own feelings, no matter what seemed to happen, it shines a LIGHT which dispels them. It makes me laugh. I end up laughing rather than crying.

Owning my feelings completely undoes the foundation of victimhood and completely removes victimhood from my perception, which means I now see myself as NOT victimized which means whatever I'm feeling is my OWN creation which means it's really quite hilariously silly that I've chosen to create this feeling. It shows me how ridiculous it is to choose to feel this way. Why would I choose to deliberately feel upset? I am recognizing it is not TRUE that its someone else's fault and its not TRUE that I have been attacked, and this therefore (through oneness) reminds me that I can't have been attacked therefore there CAN'T have been any effects, and therefore I have no reason to be upset. So I can let it go much more quickly and return to happiness.

I'm finding my 'personality' is coming out a lot more, my persona is diminishing, my happiness is increasing and I see myself as much less victimized. I have less reason to be afraid because I'm starting to believe that nobody else is doing anything to me, and that they can't. And by owning my own feelings I am owning BEING ME which means I am allowing myself to be myself freely without all this conditionality of my fake ego victim self. Yay.

Good times. Freedom.

One of the worst and most generalizing interpretations of ACIM's teaching, is that "there is no separation". This has framed any kind of separateness as wrong. It has associated all separation with duality, and has stripped oneness of any possibility of being many things.

So now we have in our minds this idea that oneness must be the total absence of separation. This even seems to make logical sense. But it's not the truth. How do we even know that reality has to be oneness? Where did we learn that crap? We've also taken it further to mean that, separation equates with duality, and a lack of separation equates with oneness. As if, there literally is "only one thing", a count of one, as reality. And obviously that must be God, so there is only God. God being alone all by himself. But that's not the truth etiher.

For a start, just as a cursory glance, ACIM has all kinds of material talking about God having a son. A what now? How can God have a son if there is no separation? If you are being strict about this it's impossible for God to have a son at all. Surely that implies there are separations in reality? Surely it's not true that reality has separate parts to it? Surely it has to be all one thing?

Who came up with this notion that reality HAS TO be all one thing with no parts? That is a gross preconception. So many of us keep projecting this idea onto what the course is saying, insisting that reality HAS to be one thing. It HAS to be oneness. We all want that lovely shiny oneness, and it absolutely cannot have any separations in it, because separation is ego, right? Well no.

How about, it would be okay for there to be a kind of separation, where even though there is a separation, it isn't a complete severance? How about if a single environment can contain two things, which are indeed two fully distinctly and wholly created things, but those two things ALSO are unified and share everything with each other? Is it still separation or ego if they are completely open to sharing everything without any selfishness?

The kind of separation that exists in reality is not the same kind of separation that exists in the ego world. The thing that you really need to get your head around is this. One thing can also be many things while still being one thing. Does that sound too radical or difficult to understand? Is such a thing impossible, and why does it have to be "not the truth"?

Wouldn't such a scenario where something is one thing, but is also two things, and the two things are still two things, but are also one thing, be somewhat transcendental? It would have to warp and transcend every notion we have about how everything is supposed to be in a nice tidy box of its own, wouldn't it. It would be some kind of weird thing where something can be one thing and two things at the same time. It might even have to be described as miraculous.

If God cannot create, God cannot live. If God cannot share, God cannot give. If God is devoid of any kind of separation, God can never create a son. Not even one. Not a single son of God can exist in God if God is this very vague idea of "oneness". Some people seem to not be comfortable with the idea of God having TWO sons, but they seem to be okay with him having ONE son, even though that's still a logical contradiction. Why is ONE SEPARATION okay?

Just on the general jist of it, ACIM is saying a whole lot of stuff about God having a son. Now, I don't know about you but if it were to be meaning that he DOES NOT have any sons AT ALL, then I would say Jesus is a terribly misleading author. Just on the basis of how often and how much "the son of God" is referenced, either Jesus is full of shit, or Jesus is deceptive, or the ENTIRE course is metaphorical.

Now, sometimes people actually do opt to believe that the whole thing is metaphorical, because that seems to put a nice bandaid on it and COVER UP the truth. It sort of ties up some loose ends. Those nasty little loose ends that keep saying God has a son. It would be great to just say, well it's all a metaphor, there isn't really a son of God, and to then go onto say that Jesus is just placating your little pretend ego self because it can't handle the truth. Where have you heard that before?

It would be quite convenient IF Jesus actually were only talking in riddles, and the entire course was a lie, and the whole thing was just playing to your ego's need for specialness, and if only "the special advanced students" will get and accept the fact that there really is NO SON AT ALL.

This is the kind of of mad thinking that some people have adopted to try to justify and explain away the very intensely radical truths in the course, to make themselves feel better and to try to understand what the heck it's saying. But it's simply wrong.

God absolutely does have a son. You're going to have to deal with that. If you think he does not have a son, then there is only God. What are the implications of this idea? If there is only God, then you are God entirely, God is dreaming of exile from God, God is insane and believes in death, God has special relationships, God creates poop, and God kills people. Hmm... Is that going to jive with your spiritual goals? It doesn't exactly sound very loving, but it is perfectly logical.

For God NOT to have participated in this madness of a hellhole we're in, he MUST be distinct from you in SOME way. There has to be some kind of freedom that you have "from him" that allows YOUR insanity to not affect him. Otherwise any madness you go into would instantly infect him, and then we'd all be lost forever. God did NOT enter "the separation", did not buy into the mad idea, and did not dream of hell. So who did? And the obvious answer is of course that you - as the Son of God - or at least ONE OF the sons of God did.

The kind of warped bandaids that a person has to come up with to try to mangle the course's meaning to make certain untruths "fit" is quite incredible. We've got people saying that God has no son at all, people saying that one separation is acceptable but not two, and we've got people saying that God can't have many sons because that mean separation. It doesn't, but that's what they think.

And mainly it's because people just cannot seem to conceive of something that TRANSCENDS "either this or that". They just can't seem to envision what a reality is like where one thing is also two things, or even many things, while still being one thing. There is NO parallel to that in the physical world. There are NO examples in your environment that you've ever encountered where one thing is also two things, or two things are one thing, or two things entirely overlap and share the same space. It seems impossible. But THIS world is impossible, so don't you think that means "one as two" is entirely possible?

What some people then don't like is the seeming SIMILARITY between this idea of God being "one and many", and their idea of duality. Oooh... it's a little bit too much like duality isn't it, that must be an ego thing, that must be a bad thing, let's get rid of it. But duality is NOT the same thing as the transcendental multiplicities of reality.

Duality really means, things are separate, AND they do not share anything. The lack of sharing is a vital part of it. It's not just that there's a separation, it's that the two things are kept apart and do not join or connect. So then you might ask what is the opposite of that? Is it oneness? NOT NECESSARILY. How about the opposite of duality, is a reality in which there are STILL many things, BUT at the same time, they SHARE EVERYTHING? What would that be like? Because that's what reality IS like.

That's exactly what Jesus describes over and over again in ACIM. A reality in which there are many parts, and where each part is the whole, and each part shares everything with all the other parts, yet is STILL a part. You being one with God, while STILL being yourself. You having your own soul, while ALSO sharing the soul of others. You being christ, while OTHERS are also christ. You having many brothers, yet each brother BEING the other brothers. That's all over the course in hundreds of ways and that's what you have to come to realize about reality.

"The recognition of the part as whole, and of the whole in every part, is PERFECTLY natural. For it is the way GOD thinks, and what is natural to Him, IS natural to you."

Reality IS NOT ONENESS. It is not the kind of "opposite of separation" that you think it is. It IS oneness, but it's not ONLY that. It is a oneness which has expressed infinite power to CREATE additional ones. It is a wholeness which has FULLY created additional WHOLE beings. It's an entire constellation of creations, where each INDIVIDUAL creation is also so joined to the others that they are ALSO one. Oh my God, did he just say that we have an INDIVIDUAL SELF IN REALITY? How can that be?!!!

"We share our life because we have one Source, a Source from Which perfection comes to us, remaining always in the holy minds which He created perfect."

"We have also emphasized that man, insofar as the term relates to Soul, has not only been fully Created, but also been created perfect. There is no emptiness in him."

Now I can hear the thoughts in your mind trying to whirl around to visualize this. And you're probably thinking well, how do these many separate things be joined, to the extent that they are one, without DISAPPEARING? Because in spacetime we only have analogies where, as two things become one thing, the separation vanishes and you can't tell them apart any more. But that's NOT the case in reality. The two things are FULLY two things, AND fully one thing, at the same time. That's what you have to come to accept. The dynamics of heaven's reality is NOT the same as the laws of physics.

God is one, and has many children, who are one, who have many creations of their own, which are one. And every one creates with every other one. And the whole sonship, which is a collection of ones, creates as one, to create many additional ones, with God, who is one with them all. Oneness extends itself, to produce more onenesses, which are each oneness, and each gives oneness, creating more onenesses, which are in turn still the same oneness. One thing, creating separate things, which are one thing still.

This cannot be understood by separating things into separate boxes. It cannot be understood by insisting that reality be a count of one. It cannot be understand by projecting ego ideas of the "lack of separations" onto it. It cannot be understood by trying to get rid of all the sons of God and all your brothers and turning the world into a solo-gameshow of you vs yourself. There ARE other people here, there are other dreamers here, there are other free willed beings here, and you DO have relationships.

The course has been smushed, crushed, distorted, twisted, mangled, bent, upheaved and shattered, by well-meaning but mistaken individuals who THINK they know that heaven has to be a singularity of God. ACIM if you read it carefully does not support this idea. Even when it says "God is". Even when it says "God has but one son". Even then it STILL ALSO SAYS that God has many sons and a family and even grandchildren. Your creations are his grandchildren. That's all in A Course in Miracles, whether a person likes it or not, or whether it makes sense or not.

Can we just let the course be what it is and say what it does and try to FIND A WAY TO ACCEPT IT, instead of keep trying to CONVERT IT INTO the models and concepts and theories and theologies that WE think it has to be? Because it is not like them. ACIM is not non-duality, it is not adviata vedanta, it is not about oneness in the traditional sense, and it doesn't teach that there is only God.

Let it be itself and let it tell you what the whole truth is. Take ALL of what Jesus says and recognize that he does NOT contradict himself, and if he says two things which SOUND contradictory, it does not mean they are. What it means is YOUR THOUGHT SYSTEM contradicts itself when it is exposed to a truth that trancends it. It isn't the course that's confused, it's you. Jesus knows what he's talking about. "We are the Kingdom, WE, the Sons of God."

"For you dwell in the Mind of God WITH your brother, for God Himself did not will to be alone."

"Because He did not will to be alone, He created a Son like Himself."

"God did not will to be alone. He SHARES His Will with you" "God would not have us be alone because HE does not will to be alone. That is why He created His Son and gave him the power to create with Him."

"It was not His Will to be alone. And neither is it YOURS. Forgive your brother, and you CANNOT separate yourself from him, nor from his Father."

God, who encompasses ALL Being, nevertheless created separate beings who have everything individually, but who want to share it to increase their joy. Nothing that is real can be increased EXCEPT by sharing it.