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W69L

Lesson 69 "My grievances hide the light of the world in me."

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No one can look upon what your grievances conceal. Because your grievances are hiding the light of the world in you, everyone stands in darkness, and you beside him. But as the veil of your grievances is lifted, you are released with him. Share your salvation now with him who stood beside you when you were in hell. He is your brother in the light of the world which saves you both.

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Today let us make another real attempt to reach the light in you. Before we undertake this in our more extended practice period, let us devote several minutes in thinking about what we are trying to do. We are literally attempting to get in touch with the salvation of the world. We are trying to see past the veil of darkness that keeps it concealed. We are trying to let the veil be lifted, and see the tears of God's Son disappear in the sunlight.

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Let us begin our longer practice period today with the full realization of all this, and real determination to reach what is dearer to us than all else. Salvation is our only need. There is no other purpose here, and no other function to fulfill. Learning salvation is our only goal. Let us end the ancient search today, by finding the light in us and holding it up for everyone who searches with us to look upon and rejoice.

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Very quietly now, with your eyes closed, try to let all the content which generally occupies your consciousness go. Think of your mind as a vast round area, surrounded by a layer of heavy dark clouds. You can see only the clouds because you seem to be standing outside the whole area, and quite apart from it. From where you stand, you can see no reason to believe there is a brilliant light hidden by the clouds. The clouds seem to be the only reality. They seem to be all there is to see. Therefore you do not attempt to go through them and past them, which is the only way in which you would be really convinced of their lack of substance. We will make this attempt today.

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After you have thought about the importance of what you are trying to do for yourself and the world, try to settle in perfect stillness, remembering only how much you want to reach the light in you today, - now. Determine to go past the clouds. Reach out and touch them in your mind. Brush them aside with your hand; feel them resting on your cheeks and forehead and eyelids as you go through them. Go on; clouds cannot stop you.

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If you are doing the exercises properly, you will begin to feel a sense of being lifted up and carried ahead. Your little effort and small determination call on the power of the universe to help you, and God Himself will raise you from darkness into light. You are in accord with His Will. You cannot fail because your will is His.

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Have confidence in your Father today, and be certain that He has heard you and has answered you. You may not recognize His answer yet, but you can indeed be sure that it is given you, and you will yet receive it. Try, as you attempt to go through the clouds to the light, to hold this confidence in your mind. Try to remember that you are at last joining your will to God's. Try to keep the thought clearly in mind that what you undertake with God must succeed. Then let the power of God work in you and through you, that His Will and yours may be done.

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In the shorter practice periods, which you will want to do as often as possible in view of the importance of today's idea to you and your happiness, remind yourself that your grievances are hiding the light of the world from your awareness. Remind yourself also that you are not searching for it alone, and that you do know where to look for it. Say, then:

"My grievances hide the light of the world in me.

I cannot see what I have hidden.

Yet I want to let it be revealed to me

for my salvation and the salvation of the world."

Also, be sure to tell yourself:

"If I hold this grievance, the light of the world will be hidden from me,"

if you are tempted to hold anything against anyone today.

Earth is in fact an alien world, and human bodies are alien bodies. Given that our true natural state or "home world" is The Kingdom of God (Heaven), Earth represents the total opposite to what is natural and is alien to it.

That which is is "alienated" is that which is separated or exiled or unlike. That which is "alien" is that which is so unlike your nature that it seems completely against it.

Jesus also refers to "alien" in the sense of heaven's truth being "alien to" how you are on earth, because it is so different. Here's what he has to say about you trying to be an alien in an alien world...

"Grievances are completely alien to love."

"If I hold grievances I am attacking love, and therefore attacking my Self. My Self thus becomes alien to me. "

"Try to avoid the tendency toward self-directed selection, which may be particularly tempting in connection with today's idea because of its wholly alien nature. Remember that any order which you impose is equally alien to reality."

"What is your Self remains an alien to the part of you which thinks that it is real but different from yourself."

"Stranger yet, he does not recognize to whom he comes, and yet maintains his home belongs to him while he is alien now who is at home."

"For in his home his Self remains. It asked no stranger in, and took no alien thought to be Itself."

"A memory of home keeps haunting you, as if there were a place which called you to return although you do not recognize the Voice, nor what it is the Voice reminds you of. Yet still you feel an alien here, from somewhere all unknown. Nothing so definite that you could say with certainty you are an exile here. Just a persistent feeling, sometimes not more than a tiny throb, at other times hardly remembered, actively dismissed, but surely to return to mind again."

"Yet there is a Child in you Who seeks His Father's house, and knows that He is alien here."

"For He would bring you back with Him, that He Himself might stay, and not return again where He does not belong and where He lives an outcast in a world of alien thoughts."

"Go home with Him from time to time today. You are as much an alien here as He."

"Yet it is up to us when this is reached; how long we let an alien will appear to be opposing His."

""Let me not separate my function from my will."

"I would not use this for an alien purpose."

"Today's idea, completely alien to the ego and the thinking of the world, is crucial to the thought reversal which this course will bring about."

"Today we try to understand the truth that giver and receiver are the same. You will need help to make this meaningful because it is so alien to the thoughts to which you are accustomed."

"When you GIVE UP peace, you are EXCLUDING yourself FROM it. This is a condition which is so ALIEN to the Kingdom that you CANNOT understand the state which prevails WITHIN it." "In your FORGIVENESS of this stranger, alien to you and yet your ancient Friend, lie HIS release, and YOUR redemption WITH him."

"The mind can think it sleeps, but that is all. It cannot change what is its waking state. It cannot make a body, nor abide within a body. What is alien to the mind does not exist, because it has no source. "

"When the mind elects to be what it is not, and to assume an alien power which it does not have, a foreign state it cannot enter, or a false condition not within its Source, it merely seems to go to sleep a while."

"Yet your defense sets up an enemy within; an alien thought at war with you, depriving you of peace, splitting your mind into two camps which seem wholly irreconcilable. For love now has an "enemy," an opposite; and fear, the alien, now needs your defense against the threat of what you really are."

"Its alien nature, TO THE EGO, is proof you will NOT find the answer there."

"Reason is ALIEN to insanity, and those who use it have gained a means which cannot BE applied to sin."

"The constancy of joy is a condition quite alien to your understanding."

"What NEEDS interpretation MUST be alien. Nor will it EVER be made understandable, by an interpreter you cannot understand."

"This child will teach you what you do not understand, and make it plain. For his will be no alien tongue."

"If you think about it, you will see that, while this kind of thinking is totally alien to having THINGS, even to the lower mind it is quite comprehensible in connection with IDEAS."

"He is not attempting to force an alien will UPON you."

"If you did not have divided wills, you would recognize that willing is salvation because it IS communication. It is impossible to communicate in alien tongues."

"Light is not of the world, yet you who bear the light in you are alien here as well. The light came with you from your native home, and stayed with you because it is your own."

"For you HAVE hurt yourself, and made your Self your enemy. And now you MUST believe you are not you, but something alien to yourself and "something else," a "something" to be feared instead of loved."

"The Eternal Guest remains, but His Voice grows faint in alien company. "

"Come home. You have not found your happiness in foreign places, and in alien forms which have no meaning to you, though you sought to make them meaningful. This world is not where you belong. You are a stranger here."

"Without its function then, it has no peace, and happiness is alien to its thoughts."

"It is not the purpose of an alien power, thrust upon you unwillingly."

"And you WILL deny your Self, and walk upon an alien ground which your Creator did not make, and where you seem to be a "something" you are not."

"He would have no separation, like an alien will, rise between what He wills for you, and what YOU will."

"You know not what you say, and so you know not what is said to you. But your Interpreter perceives the meaning in your alien language."

"The seeds of sickness and the shame of sin He CANNOT bridge, for He cannot destroy the alien will that He created not."

"Nothing is so alien to you as the simple truth and nothing are you LESS inclined to listen to."

"He does not see the Christ in him who calls. What answer can he give to one who seems to be a stranger; alien to the truth and poor in wisdom, without the god who must be given him?"

"Herein lies the basis of all errors, for all of them are but attempts to compromise by seeing just a little bit of hell. This is a mockery so alien to God that it must be forever inconceivable. But the insane believe it because they are insane."

"Dreams of any kind are strange and alien to the truth."

"Sin has no place in Heaven, where its results are alien, and can no more enter than can their source. "

"If you will consider WHAT you have taught, and how alien it is to what you THOUGHT you knew, you will be COMPELLED to recognize that your Teacher came from BEYOND your thought-system, and so could look upon it fairly, and perceive it was untrue."

"It is hard to teach the mind a thousand alien names and thousands more. Yet you believe this is what learning means; its one essential goal by which communication is achieved and concepts can be meaningfully shared."

"God's Will does not oppose. It merely is. It is not God you have imprisoned in your plan to lose your Self. He does not know about a plan so alien to His Will."

"Let us not try longer to impose an alien will upon His single purpose."

"And no thought ALIEN to His Oneness can abide with Him there."

"The ego does not know the difference between grandeur and grandiosity, because it does not know the difference between miracle-impulses and ego-alien beliefs of its own."

"There is no thought in all the world which leads to any understanding of the laws it follows, nor the Thought which it reflects. It is as alien to the world as is your own reality."

"Perceiving something alien to itself in your MIND, the ego turns to the body, NOT the mind as its ally BECAUSE the body is not part of you."

"The world began with one strange lesson, powerful enough to render God forgotten, and His Son an alien to himself, in exile from the home where God Himself established him."

"Nothing at all has happened, but that you have put yourself to sleep, and dreamed a dream in which you were an alien to yourself, and but a part of someone ELSE's dream."

"The son of man perceives an alien will, AND WISHES IT WERE SO."

"You were at peace until you asked for special favor, and God did not give it. For the request was alien to Him, and you could not ask this of a Father who truly loved His Son."

"To value specialness is to esteem an alien will, to which illusions of yourself ARE dearer than the truth."

"By adopting the ego's viewpoint, you undertook an ego-alien journey WITH THE EGO AS GUIDE. "

"Salvation does not seek to use a means as yet too alien to your thinking to be helpful, nor to make the kinds of change you could not recognize."

"Vengeance is alien to His Mind BECAUSE He knows of justice."

"To the world, generosity means "giving away" in the sense of "giving up." To the teachers of God, it means "giving away" in order to keep. This has been emphasized throughout the text and the workbook, but it is perhaps more alien to the thinking of the world than many other ideas in our curriculum."

"Teaching devices which are totally alien to a learner's perceptual system are usually merely disruptive."

"Each Soul knows God completely. This IS the miraculous power of the Soul. The fact that each Soul has this power completely is a fact that is entirely alien to human thinking, in which if any ONE has everything, there is nothing LEFT."

G4

Chapter 4 - Our Gift to God

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There is no gift of faith that God does not accept with gratitude. He loves His Son. And as He gives His gifts to him, so is He grateful for the gifts His Son gives Him. Gratitude is the song of Heaven, the single harmony of all creation at one with its Creator. For gratitude is love expressed in joining; the necessary condition for extension and the prerequisite for peace. And who can be in conflict and love God?

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We have discussed the gifts of God to you. Now we must also speak of those that you can give to Him. For it is these that render His giving, complete, as it is His to you that make you whole. Giving is joy and holiness and healing. Here is your answer to the world, and God's as well. For here it is you join with Him, His likeness being yours in this alone.

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How can you give to Him Who has no lack, no need, no emptiness, no unlit place which needs a light that you can offer Him? He saves your gifts for you. He does not know of giving and receiving. What is love, or comes from love, or offers love a gift, is one to Him because it is of Him. To Him and from Him are not different to One Who has no opposite. For love is all there is and everything there is. A gift to love is given everyone, not lessening the giver, nor in truth adding to the receiver. More than love there cannot be. But this a gift becomes if it is truly given and received by both to both who know that they are one:

a key to silence and the peace of God,

a glad acknowledgement of love of Christ,

a greeting to the Holy Spirit's help,

an invitation that He enter in

and lift the Son of God unto Himself.

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What more would God hold dearer, than this? These are His gifts as much as they are yours, for in them giver and receiver join. A gift is holy only when there is no sense of all of who will gain thereby, and not a shadow of a thought of loss. It is not easy in the world to know what giving means, and how to give a gift that God and all creation will accept as shining outward from a thankful heart and inward to the altar of its God.

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God gives the grace to give as He must give, for He must give the only way He knows, and what He knows is everything He is. Christ gives as He does, being like Himself. And nothing stands outside the gifts They give, for every gift is all-encompassing and lifts the universe into Their arms.

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Yet what of you who seem to be on earth, and do not understand what giving is because you have forgotten what love means? What gifts are there that you can give to God? My brother, there are many calls to you from those who lost their way and need your help in finding it again. It seems to you that you are helping them if you respond to what they ask and what you think they need. Yet it is always God Who calls to you, and he who asks your help is but yourself. Who is the giver and the receiver then? Who asks the gift and who is given it?

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This is the only lesson that the world must teach in giving. It is not the one the world was made to teach. And yet it is the one the Holy Spirit sees in it, and so it is the only one it has. Forget the other devastating ways the gifts of earth are given and received. Forget the cost, the thoughts of loss and gain, the bargaining, the counting of the score, the world associates with every gift it gives in strict accordance with its laws. The money-changers of the market-place have been your teachers. Now they need a gift they could not give. Be savior now to them because you have another Teacher now.

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Count not the cost of giving. There is none. Your teachers have deceived. But do not think that their mistakes were not your own as well. To all who do not understand the gifts of God and Christ are one, be yours the voice that echoes what the Voice for God would say:

"Save Me, My brother, as you save yourself,

And let Me give to God your gifts for you

Because My altar waits for them in love,

And God is asking that We place them there."

There is no love but God's; no gifts but His. We but return his Own unto Himself. But as we do, He comes to call His Son from the far country where he threw away the memory of all his Father's gifts, and ask him to return again to Him.

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Child of Eternal Love, what gift is there your Father wants of you except yourself? And what is there that you would rather give, for what is there that you would rather have? You have forgotten Who you really are. What but that memory is dear to you? What trifling gifts made out of sickly fear and evil dreams of suffering and death can be the substitute you really want for the remembrance of Christ in you? In the far country you were lost indeed, but you were not forgotten. Hear the call of love to love, by love, in love to you, and rise with love beside you to return the gift of love that He has given you, and you have given Him in gratitude.

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Do not forget the Source of what you are, and do not think He has forgotten you. Love does not waver, and does not forget the gifts it gives that it would have you keep. Return them, then, for it is dark indeed in the far country, where God's memory has seemed to disappear. Yet Christ has come wherever you have gone. For you are His, and being His you are His Father's too. He brings with Him the gifts His Father gave, and giving them to you He teaches you how to return them in the way He gives. Light knows no limit; love no lessening. Return, My Child, to Me. For Christ is He Who is My Son and you are one with Him. You are My gift, for you are one with Me.

T24C

Section 3 - The Treachery of Specialness

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Comparison MUST be an ego device, for love makes none. Specialness ALWAYS makes comparisons. It is ESTABLISHED by a lack seen in another, and maintained by searching for and keeping clear in sight all lacks it can perceive. This does it seek, and this it looks upon. And ALWAYS whom it thus diminishes would be your Savior, had you not chosen to make of him a tiny measure of your specialness instead. Against the littleness you see in him you stand as tall and stately, clean and honest, pure and unsullied by comparison with what you see.

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Nor do you understand it is YOURSELF that you diminish thus. Pursuit of specialness is always at the cost of peace. Who can attack his Savior, and cut him down, and recognize his strong support? Who can detract from his omnipotence, and SHARE his power? And who can use him as the gauge of littleness, and be RELEASED from limits? You have a function in salvation. ITS pursuit will bring you joy. But the pursuit of specialness MUST bring you pain. Here is a goal that would defeat salvation, and thus run COUNTER to the Will of God. To value specialness is to esteem an alien will, to which illusions of yourself ARE dearer than the truth.

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Specialness is the idea of sin MADE REAL. Sin is impossible even to imagine, without this base. For sin rose from it, out of nothingness, an evil flower with no roots at all. Here is the self-made savior, the creator who creates UNLIKE the Father, and which made His Son like to itself, and NOT like unto Him. His SPECIAL sons are many, NEVER one, each one in exile from himself and Him of Whom they are a part. Nor do they love the Oneness which created them as One with Him. They chose their specialness INSTEAD of Heaven and INSTEAD of peace, and wrapped it carefully in sin, to keep it "safe" from truth.

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You are NOT special. If you think you are, and would defend your specialness against the truth of what you REALLY are, how can you know the truth? What answer that the Holy Spirit gives can reach you, when it is your specialness to which you listen, and which asks AND ANSWERS? Its tiny answer, soundless in the melody which pours from God to you eternally in loving praise of what you are, is all you listen to. And that vast song of honor and of love for what you are seems silent and unheard before ITS mightiness. You strain your ears to hear ITS soundless voice, and yet the Call of God Himself is soundless to you.

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You CAN defend your specialness, but never will you hear the Voice for God beside it. They speak a different language, and they fall on different ears. To every special one a DIFFERENT message, and one with DIFFERENT meaning, is the truth. Yet how CAN truth be different to each one? The special messages the special hear convince them THEY are different and apart; each in his special sins and safe from love, which does not see his specialness at all. Christ's Vision IS their enemy, for it sees not what THEY would look upon. And it WOULD show them that the specialness they think they see IS an illusion.

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What would they see instead? The shining radiance of the Son of God, so like his Father that the memory of Him springs instantly to mind. And with this memory, the Son remembers his own creations, as like to him as he is to his Father. And all the world he made, and all his specialness, and all the sins he held in its defense AGAINST himself, will vanish as his mind accepts the truth about himself, as it returns to take their place. This is the only "cost" of truth. You will no longer see what never was, nor hear what makes no sound. Is it a sacrifice to give up nothing, and to receive the Love of God forever?

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You who have chained your Savior to your specialness, and given it HIS place, remember this: He has NOT lost the power to forgive you all the sins you think you placed between him and the function of salvation GIVEN him for you. Nor will you CHANGE his function, any more than you can change the truth in him and in yourself. But be you certain that the truth is just the same in both. It gives no different messages, and has ONE meaning. And it is one you BOTH can understand, and one which brings release to BOTH of you. Here stands your brother with the key to Heaven in his hand, held out to you. Let not the dream of specialness remain between you. What is one IS joined in truth.

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Think of the loveliness that you will see within yourself, when you have looked on him as on a Friend. He IS the enemy of specialness, but ONLY friend to what is real in you. Not one attack you thought you made on him has taken from him the gift that God would have him give to you. His need to give it is as great as yours to have it. Let him forgive you all your specialness, and make you whole in mind, and one with him. He waits for your forgiveness only that he may return it unto you. It is not God Who has condemned His Son. But ONLY you, to save his specialness, and kill his Self.

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You have come far along the way of truth; too far to falter now. Just one step more, and every vestige of the fear of God will melt away in love. Your brother's specialness and yours ARE enemies, and bound in hate to kill each other and DENY they are the same. Yet it is not illusions that have reached this final obstacle that seems to make God and His Heaven so remote that they cannot be reached. Here, in this holy place, does truth stand waiting to receive you both in silent blessing, and in peace so real and so encompassing that NOTHING stands outside.

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Leave all illusions of yourself OUTSIDE this place, to which you come in hope and honesty. Here is your Savior FROM your specialness. He is in need of your acceptance of himself as part of you, as you for his. You are alike to God as God is to Himself. He is not special, for He would not keep one part of what He is unto Himself, NOT given to His Son, but kept for Him alone. And it is this you fear; for, if He is not special, then He willed His Son be like Him, and your brother IS like you. Not special, but possessed of everything, INCLUDING you.

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Give him but what he has, remembering God gave Himself to BOTH of you in equal love, that both might share the universe with Him Who chose that love could never be divided and kept separate from what it IS and must forever be. You ARE your brother's; part of love was not DENIED to him. But can it be that YOU have lost because HE is complete? What has been given him makes YOU complete, as it does him. God's love gave you to him and him to you, BECAUSE He gave Himself. What is the same as God IS One with Him. And ONLY specialness could make the truth of God and you AS One seem anything BUT Heaven. And the hope of peace at last in sight.

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Specialness is the seal of treachery upon the gift of love. Whatever serves its purpose MUST be given to kill. No gift that bears its seal but offers treachery to giver and receiver. Not one glance from eyes it veils but looks on sight of death. Not one believer in its potency but seeks for bargains and for compromise that would establish sin as love's substitute, and serve it faithfully. And no relationship that holds its purpose dear but clings to murder as safety's weapon, and the great defender of all illusions from the "threat" of love.

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The hope of specialness makes it seem possible God made the body as the prison-house which keeps His Son from Him. For it DEMANDS a special place God cannot enter, and a hiding-place where none is welcome but your tiny self. Nothing is sacred here but unto you, and you alone, apart and separate from all your brothers; safe from ALL intrusions of sanity upon illusions; safe from God, and safe for conflict everlasting. Here are the gates of hell you closed upon yourself, to rule in madness and in loneliness your special kingdom, APART from God, AWAY from truth and from salvation.

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The key you threw away God gave your brother, whose holy hands would offer it to you, when you were ready to accept His plan for your salvation in place of yours. How could this readiness be reached save through the sight of all your misery, and the awareness that your plan has failed, and will forever fail to bring you peace and joy of ANY kind? Through this despair you travel now, yet it is but ILLUSION of despair. The death of specialness is NOT your death, but your awaking into Life Eternal. You but emerge from an illusion of what you are, to the acceptance of yourself as God created you.

A Course in Miracles - Urtext material - reproduced with permission from the Foundation for Inner Peace (acim.org), and the Foundation for A Course in Miracles (facim.org).
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