WHAT DO YOU WANT? Light or darkness, knowledge or ignorance are yours, but not both. Opposites must be brought together, and not kept apart. For their separation is only in your mind, and they are reconciled by union, as YOU are. In union, everything that is not real MUST disappear, for truth IS union. As darkness disappears in light, so ignorance fades away when knowledge dawns. Perception is the medium by which ignorance is BROUGHT to knowledge. But the perception must be without deceit, for otherwise, it becomes the messenger of ignorance, rather than a helper in the search for truth.
The search for truth is but the honest searching out of everything that INTERFERES with truth. TRUTH IS. And can be neither lost, nor sought, nor found. It is there, wherever YOU are, being WITHIN you. But it CAN be recognized or unrecognized, real or false, to YOU. If you hide it, it becomes unreal to you, BECAUSE you hid it, and SURROUNDED IT WITH FEAR. Under each cornerstone of fear, on which you have erected your insane system of belief, THE TRUTH LIES HIDDEN. Yet you cannot know this, for, by HIDING truth in fear, you see no reason to believe the more you LOOK at fear, the LESS you see it, and the clearer WHAT IT CONCEALS becomes.
It is not possible to convince the unknowing that they know. From their point of view, IT IS NOT TRUE. Yet it IS true, because GOD knows it. These are clearly opposite viewpoints of what the "unknowing" ARE. To God, unknowing is impossible. It is therefore not a point of view at all, but merely a belief in something that does not exist. It is only this BELIEF that the unknowing have, and BY it, they are wrong about themselves. They have DEFINED themselves as they were NOT created. Their creation was NOT a point of view, but rather, a CERTAINTY. Uncertainty BROUGHT to certainty does not retain ANY conviction of reality.
You must have noticed that the emphasis has been on bringing what is undesirable TO the desirable, what you do NOT want to what you DO. You will realize that salvation MUST come to you this way, if you consider what dissociation IS. Dissociation is a distorted process of thinking, whereby two systems of belief, which CANNOT coexist, are BOTH MAINTAINED. It HAS BEEN recognized that, if they were BROUGHT TOGETHER, their joint acceptance WOULD become impossible. But, if one is kept in darkness FROM THE OTHER, their SEPARATION seems to keep them both alive, and equal in their reality. Their JOINING thus becomes the source of fear, for, if they meet, acceptance MUST be withdrawn from one of them.
You CANNOT have them both, for each DENIES the other. Apart, this fact is lost from sight, for each, in a SEPARATE place, CAN be endowed with firm belief. BRING THEM TOGETHER, and the fact of their complete incompatibility is instantly apparent. One WILL go, BECAUSE the other is seen in the SAME place. Light cannot enter darkness, when a mind BELIEVES in darkness, and will not let it go. Truth does not struggle AGAINST ignorance, and love does not ATTACK fear. What needs no protection, does not defend itself. Defense was of YOUR making. God knows it not.
The Holy Spirit uses defenses ON BEHALF of truth, only because you made them AGAINST it. His perception of them, according to HIS purpose, merely changes them into a CALL FOR what you have ATTACKED WITH them. Defenses, like everything you made, must be gently turned to your own good, translated by Him from means of self-destruction, to means of preservation and release. His task is mighty, but the power of God is with Him. Therefore, to Him, it is so easy, that it was accomplished the instant it was given Him for you.
Do not delay yourselves in your return to peace, by wondering how He can fulfill what God has given Him to do. Leave that to Him Who knows! You are not asked to do mighty tasks yourself. You are merely asked to do the little He SUGGESTS you do, trusting Him only to the small extent of believing that, if He asks it, you can do it. You will SEE how easily ALL that He asks can be accomplished. He asks of you but this; - bring to Him every secret you have locked away from Him. Open every door to Him, and bid Him enter the darkness, and lighten it away.
At YOUR request, He enters gladly. He brings the light to darkness, if you make the darkness OPEN to Him. But what you hide, He cannot look upon. For He sees FOR YOU, and unless you look WITH Him, He CANNOT see. The vision of Christ is not for Him alone, but for Him WITH YOU. Bring, therefore, all your dark and secret thoughts to Him, and look upon them WITH Him. He holds the light, and you the darkness. They CANNOT coexist, when both of you TOGETHER look on them. His judgment MUST prevail, and He will GIVE it to you, as you join your perception to His. Joining with Him in seeing, is the way in which you learn to share with Him the interpretation of perception that leads to knowledge.
You cannot see alone. Sharing perception with Him Whom God has given you, teaches you how to RECOGNIZE what you see. It is the recognition that NOTHING you see means ANYTHING alone. Seeing WITH Him will SHOW you that all meaning, INCLUDING YOURS, comes not from double vision, but from the gentle fusing of everything into one meaning, one emotion and one purpose. God has one Purpose, which He shares with you. The single vision, which the Holy Spirit offers you, will bring this Oneness to your mind with clarity and brightness so intense, you could not wish, for all the world, not to accept what God would have you have. Behold your will, accepting it as His, with all His love as yours. All honor to you through Him, and through Him unto God.
In the darkness you have obscured the glory God gave you, and the power that He bestowed upon His guiltless Son. All that, lies hidden in every darkened place shrouded in guilt, and in the dark denial of innocence. Behind the dark doors which you have closed lies nothing, BECAUSE nothing CAN obscure the gift of God. It is the CLOSING of the doors, that interferes with recognition of the power of God that shines in you. Banish not power from your mind, but let all that would hide your glory, be brought to the judgment of the Holy Spirit, and there undone. Whom He would save for glory IS saved for it. He has promised the Father that, through Him, you would be released from littleness to glory.
To what He promised God, He is wholly faithful, for He shared WITH God the promise that was given to Him to share with YOU. He shares it still, FOR YOU. Everything that promises otherwise, great or small, however much or little valued, He will replace with the one promise GIVEN unto Him to lay upon the altar to your Father and His Son. No altar stands to God WITHOUT His Son. And NOTHING brought there that is not equally worthy of BOTH, but will be REPLACED by gifts wholly acceptable to Father AND to Son. Can you offer guilt to God? You cannot, then, offer it to His Son. For they are NOT apart, and gifts to one ARE offered to the other.
You know not God, because you know not this. And yet you DO know God, and ALSO this. All this is safe WITHIN you, where the Holy Spirit shines. He shines not in division, but in the meeting-place where God, UNITED with His Son, speaks to His Son THROUGH Him. Communication between what cannot BE divided CANNOT cease. The holy meeting-place of the unseparated Father and His Son lies in the Holy Spirit, and in YOU. All interference in the communication that God Himself wills with His Son is quite impossible here. Unbroken and uninterrupted love flows constantly between the Father and the Son, as BOTH would have it be. And so it IS.
Let your minds wander not through darkened corridors, AWAY from Light's center. You may choose to lead YOURSELVES astray, but you can only be BROUGHT TOGETHER by the Guide appointed FOR you. He will surely lead you to where God and His Son await your recognition. They are joined in giving you the gift of Oneness, before which ALL separation vanishes. Unite with what you ARE. You CANNOT join with anything EXCEPT reality. God's glory and His Son's BELONG to you in truth. They HAVE no opposite, and nothing else CAN you bestow upon yourselves.
There is no substitute for truth. And truth will make this plain to you, as you are brought into the place where you must MEET with truth. And there you must be led, through gentle understanding, which can lead you nowhere else. Where God is, there are YOU. Such IS the truth. Nothing can change the knowledge GIVEN you by God into UNknowing. Everything God created KNOWS its Creator. For this is how creation is accomplished, by the Creator, and by His creations. In the holy meeting-place are joined the Father and His creations, and the creations of His Son, with them together.
There is one link which joins them all together, holding them in the Oneness out of which creation happens. The link with which the Father joins Himself to those He gives the power to create LIKE Him, can NEVER be dissolved. Heaven itself is union with ALL of creation, and with its One Creator. And Heaven remains the Will of God for YOU. Lay no gifts other than this upon your altars, for nothing can coexist BESIDE it. Here, your meager offerings are BROUGHT TOGETHER with the gift of God, and only what is worthy of the Father will be accepted by the Son, for whom it was intended. To whom God gives Himself, He IS given. Your little gifts will vanish, on the altar where He has placed His Own.
Conflict must be resolved. It cannot be evaded, set aside, denied, disguised, seen somewhere else, called by another name, nor hidden by deceit of any kind, if it would be escaped. It must be seen exactly as it is, where it is thought to be, in the reality which has been given it, and with the purpose that the mind accorded it. For only then are its defenses lifted, and the truth can shine upon it as it disappears.
"Father, forgiveness is the light You chose to shine away all conflict and all doubt, and light the way for our return to You. No light but this can end our evil dreams. No light but this can save the world. For this alone will never fail in anything, being Your gift to Your beloved Son."
I complain that food manufacturers constantly package food in containers which are way larger than the contents, and when you go to open it up you find it's half empty and feel deceived. It IS a dishonest practice. At first it was the 'oh potatoe chips need extra air space to cushion them against breakage' but then it was... well, here's 20 other foods that don't have this risk but still come with a large airspace. The packaging mis-represents what you actually will get. Ok, that's just a deceptive shitty lie.
Ok. That's my complaint. Now, let's look at what has happened because of this complaint.
I've started out by seeing myself as being victimized. I ask, who am *I* in this scenario. There's the food manufacturer over there and there's the product sitting in front of me and I'm seeing this scenario where I'm looking at ME in a particular way. I think I'm looking at the food container and complaining, but that's actually a few steps down the road. What happened before my angry reaction was me seeing myself 'in' the scenario as a victim. ie..
1) If the food item has more empty space than needed, I have decided that this means there is dishonesty. It's dishonesty on the level of form and implies deceit.
2) If there is deceit in the food item, and because I say it means they are being deceiving, and because I have an interest in this food item, I am now a part of the story and it is ME that is being deceived. It's personal!
3) Now that it's 'affecting me' (because of the way I CHOSE to position myself as the victim in the story), I am now justified in anger and annoyance. Now I can blame them. Now I can say it's their fault that I am angry, because what they did happened before what I did. But this covers up the fact that what I did (made it real, gave it meaning it doesn't have, treated it as non-neutral), happened before anything else.
4) If I am seeing guilt in the food container then who is experiencing guilt? I might be trying to get THEM to experience guilt but it's a part of my reality, so *I* am experiencing guilt, albeit displaced. That means there's guilt in my mind, and I believe in my own guilt. That means I believe I've sinned, and I'm trying to pin it on the food container and the people who made it wrongly.
So as I find the huge airspace in a bag of chips annoying, or the gross vomit-like quality of tv dinners to be nothing like the beautiful arrangement on the box cover, or the totally unnecessary container size housing rather less product just to get me to think that I am getting more than I am, I have this opportunity to realize.... this is ONLY there to trigger my own self-attack and to remind me that I am CHOOSING to see myself as a victim, and I'm only choosing that because *I* BELIEVE* I am deceptive and dishonest and guilty. Hmmm.
So... then it boils down to this. I can't hold THEM guilty without holding myself guilty, because this guilt is mine. Hmm. Ok, I forgive them BECAUSE they did not do anything, I DID IT. And I forgive me because I did not really DO anything, nothing has happened. And I am forgiven already because none of this happened in the first place, it's just a dream that isn't real. And I am actually whole and one with GOD right now being HAPPY rather than right. Yay. We are ALL innocent and equal and One and none of us are guilty at all.
Ok now to eat some chips.
You don't need to become more loving. You already are created by love as love.
You don't need to become more innocent. You are already perfectly innocent in God's eyes.
You don't need to become more truthful. God already has established the truth and nothing can be added to it.
You don't need to become more spiritual. You are already immortal spirit.
You don't need to seek to find what you think you have lost or never had. You have everything God provided already, and it has not been lost and never will be.
You don't need to become more of yourself or figure out who or what you are. God has already established who and what you are.
All of these qualities which you might strive for, in your "spiritual seeking" is usually the ego seeking to maintain the the idea that you lack all of these things, and usually it will very passionately tell you you are not any of these things already. This is what takes you away from what is already your natural inheritance.
You don't need to be in the business of becoming spirit, or gaining immortality, or establishing innocence, or getting forgiven, or turning into God's child. YOU ALREADY ARE. Underneath all the bullshit, lies, cover-ups, deceit, illusions and denial, YOU already are absolutely perfect, shining in the brilliance of God's love.
The ONLLLLLLLLYYYY task you have, is UNCOVERING YOURSELF. Taking off the mask, removing the presence, getting rid of the illusions, seeing through the deceptions, shining a light on the untruths, recognizing false beliefs as false, not believing the ego's lies and not listening to your own bullshit.
Underneath your own bullshit is YOU, the real you, already perfect and immaculate and immortal and innocent. It has not been removed. It has not been changed. It has not been damaged. It has not been defiled. It has not been interrupted or upset or made to be what God didn't want it to be. You are still EXACTLY as God created you.
So this is all you need to work on. ... uncovering the truth, not defining it, not making it up. Revealing it. Exposing it. Not strengthening it - it is already total strength - but becoming more aware of the strength that is already in you. Not building yourself up. Not becoming a hero or a spiritual guru of worship. Just being yourself - the you that you are, beneath all the facades of the ego persona and shadow that seem to disguise you in a cloak of death.
You're immortal spirit, you know, son of God, hiding out with heavy clothing on. You just need to get naked.
Indeed, yes! No-one can escape God's final judgment. Who could flee forever from the truth? But the final judgment will not come until it is no longer associated with fear. One day each one will welcome it, and on that very day it will be given him. He will hear his sinlessness proclaimed around and around the world, setting it free as God's final judgment on him is received. This is the judgment in which salvation lies. This is the judgment that will set him free. This is the judgment in which all things are freed with him. Time pauses as eternity comes near, and silence lies across the world that everyone may hear this judgment of the Son of God:
"Holy are you, eternal, free and whole,
At peace forever in the Heart of God.
Where is the world, and where is sorrow now?"
Is this your judgment on yourself, teacher of God? Do you believe that this is wholly true? No, not yet, not yet. But this is still your goal; why you are here. It is your function to prepare yourself to hear this judgment and to recognize that it is true. One instant of complete belief in this, and you will go beyond belief to Certainty. One instant out of time can bring time's end. Judge not, for you but judge yourself and thus delay this final judgment. What is your judgment on the world, teacher of God? Have you yet learned to stand aside and hear the Voice of Judgment in yourself? Or do you still attempt to take His role from Him? Learn to be quiet, for His Voice is heard in stillness. And His Judgment comes to all who stand aside in quiet listening, and wait for Him.
You who are sometimes sad and sometimes angry; who sometimes feel your just due is not given you, and your best efforts meet with lack of appreciation and even with contempt; give up these foolish thoughts. They are too small and meaningless to occupy your holy minds an instant longer. God's Judgment waits for you to set you free. What can the world hold out to you, regardless of your judgments on its gifts, that you would rather have? You will be judged, and judged in fairness and in honesty. There is no deceit in God. His promises are sure. Only remember that. His promises have guaranteed His judgment, and His alone, will be accepted in the end. It is your function to make that end be soon. It is your function to hold it in your heart, and offer it to all the world to keep it safe.
You can be completely sure, or at least convinced that you are, that something is true or 'the case', and still be mistaken.
You can be totally adamant that you're right about this, and still not be right about it.
You can be convinced that what you believe is absolutely THE truth and everyone else is stupid and wrong, and still be believing something that isn't true.
You can even have insanity and be convinced that you're sane and not even suspect that you aren't.
You can trust your senses and believe what your eyes are showing you and still be mistaken about what's happening.
You can have reactions that you think are normal and natural and objective and still be totally out of touch with reality.
You can have circumstantial evidence that seems to all point toward something being true as if it's really clear convincing proof of it, and it still be a completely false conclusion.
You can think you did something or learned something already and it doesn't need to be learned and yet still fall short of knowing how to do it.
You can be sure you've fully dealt with a past hurt or a complaint or a grievance or an old hatred and have let it go and still have a shitload of release work to do (lol, story of my life).
You can be totally sure that your faculties are telling you the truth, that your mind is capable of discerning what something is or isn't, and that you are being totally objective about it, and still be subjectively hallucinating.
You can trust your ego as if you believe it is really your friend and is on your side and is helping you and protecting you and all the while being deceived and led down a dark path by it.
You can be really convinced that getting something that you're missing is going to solve your life and fix your lack and still totally feel empty and hopeless when you get it.
You can think you know what things are for or why they're happening or what the purpose is or why someone is doing something and still be totally clueless as to what the real plan is.
You can think you know what's best for other people and how they need to be fixed or helped and what their problem is and still be projecting all your own problems and unconsciousness and not even recognize it.
You can also believe you know who you are already, and think you are awake, while all the while being asleep and unaware of your real self, convinced that you are some other identity.
You might also have conviction that you really are a body or that you can die and that you're not as God created you, and still not realize that this isn't true and that you are immortal spirit.
The ego's mistakes and deceit and denials and illusions go on and on and on, always convinced of its own prowess and ability to discern the truth, or that it is actually aware of 'what is', and all the while living in a private fantasy world of insanity where nothing is true at all.
A little willingness is needed to consider that you might be mistaken or that there is more going on here than you are aware of.
In our attempts to run away from pain and suffering, we might view ACIM as a path that leads us out of the world and into God.
There are a great many students who believe the course is telling them to do just this, to essentially turn their back on the world and seek for an escape. Trying to find a sense of peace that let's them no longer be bothered by the world, eventually to hit the eject button and exit it entirely, leaving it behind for all the other sorry souls to suffer alone.
But what actually happens when you uncover the light within, the love of God, is this light shines out and extends and radiates. You are actually supposed to be the light of the world, a teacher of God, a healer, a manifestation of Christ, using the body for a holy purpose. You are supposed to be part of the great crusade, working miracles in the world and bringing life to death.
That means that in fact we have it totally backwards. We are not tasked with fleeing a sinking ship. We are tasked with replacing the ship with God's Kingdom. Not of disappearing off into a safe house while everyone else remains in hell, but rather of bringing heaven into the prison cell to melt the walls and set everyone free.
The light of heaven has to be shine into the spacetime, in order to bring life to death, and produce resurrection. The entire course is about resurrection, and this world is nothing more than an illusion of a death area of heaven that needs healing. Essentially we need to heal a "part of heaven" that has temporarily taken on a form that seems to be heaven's opposite, so that the forms will disappear and only heaven will remain. You can't do that if you are trying to flee to higher ground.
Thus we actually are tasked with bringing light INTO the darkness, SO THAT the darkness is shone away and replaced with light. That's how the light works, it dispels and shines away the darkness and replaces it. It doesn't hide on a fence or in some passive back alley avoiding the world.
You can't really be a teacher of God if you are not extending God. And that means you are shining love into the world here and now. And that love will bring life and healing to minds and bodies, a love which eventually will actually infuse the world so much that it will shine it away, leaving only the light of God.
Heaven is means to REPLACE the world we made, and we are meant to be part of the means by which this replacement happens. And that means you have to bring God's reflection into the world, bring the light into the darkness, shed miracles onto spacetime, and essentially to reverse the attack on God that made the world in the first place.
The world is basically like a wound that needs healing, but the purpose of healing the wound isn't to keep the wound but in a healed condition. The purpose of healing is to erase the wound entirely. At first the wound appears to heal, to transform, to reflect wholeness, then eventually it itself gives way to the underlying wholeness it was hiding.
And then only heaven remains, and there is no longer an attempt to escape (which is a form of separation), but simply a dwelling in the here and now of eternity within heaven itself, since there is no longer anywhere else to be.
"Miracles fall like drops of healing rain from Heaven on a dry and dusty world, where starved and thirsty creatures came to die. Now they have water. Now the world is green. And everywhere the signs of life spring up, to show that what is born can never die, for what has life has immortality."
"Fail not in your function of loving in a loveless place, made out of darkness and deceit, for thus are darkness and deception UNdone."
Imagine that you live in a reality where you are always included in everything. Anything that happens, happens to others, and it happens to you. Anything that you give, you give to others, but you also receive. Anything that transpires happens to all at once.
Anything that is expressed by you is received by everyone, and received by yourself. Like, you literally ARE the whole of everything. The whole is your self. The entire realm of reality, the kingdom of God, is your self. So anything that takes place, you know about it, you feel it, you experience it along with everyone.
Everyone co-creates together. You are never excluded in any way. That's the fundamental fact of how reality actually IS. This is the law of God. This is the golden rule. What you do to another you do to yourself. You are one with everyone. You are the whole environment, not just a figure in the environment. You are heaven. The kingdom is your self. The sonship is your soul. All your brothers are part of you. No-one escapes anything ever. Everyone is always included, shares everything, has everything.
This is how reality really is. This is what produces shared interests. How would you act, think, feel, behave, if you knew that this was the fundamental law of existence? That anything you do even slightly you will do to yourself as well? This provides the incentive that you should only love, otherwise you will deprive yourself of love. You should only heal, otherwise you will make yourself sick. You should only include, otherwise you will become alone.
This is what ACIM is teaching you to remember and to attune to. Knowing your neighbor and brother as yourself. Realizing that if you do something you do it to yourself. The secret of salvation. Whatever you give you receive. Anything you see as being in your own interest is to be seen as being in the interests of everyone. Miracles are given to you in order that the be given through you to others and thus shared by everyone. Miracles are a universal blessing from God to the entire sonship all at once.
We need to re-learn this because we have forgotten how to live as shared entities, with shared identities. We think we are separated off by bodies, exclusive, omitted, rejected, lost, alone, not qualifying, left out. As though others can do something that doesn't include themselves, and you can do things in return that don't include yourself. As if you can get away with murder. As if you can attack without being attacked, or project guilt and escape from it without it still belonging to you. This is all the ego's realm of lies and deceit, denial and projection, dissociation and separation.
You have to learn to remember again that you are not just some separate figure in the world, separated off from others, separate from effects. You are the entire environment. You are the whole. You are the sonship. You are the kingdom of God. You are included in everything at all times. Every thought affects everyone. Every act impacts the entire universe. You are the one, shared with all. Everything belongs to you and to everyone else simultaneously. Everyone has full access to everything at all times. There are no limits anywhere.
"The secret of salvation is that you are doing this to yourself."
"I am not alone in experiencing the effects of my thinking."
"When I heal I am not healed alone."
"Nothing is for you alone."
"Atonement is a lesson in sharing."
"I will not judge lest I be judged."
"Giving and receiving are one."
"Miracles are a universal blessing from God through me to all my brothers."
"One brother is all brothers. Every mind contains all minds. Such is the truth."
"You had everything when you were created, just as everyone did."
"The sonship is your soul."
"We are the kingdom, WE, the sons of God."
"The Kingdom of heaven includes all his children and their creations."
"I and my father are one."
ALL of your ego's functioning stems from a very very simple premise. Once you start to realize what this foundation is, it frames everything the ego does as just another example of this one thing.
The foundation of the ego is simply the suggestion that you are not love - the love is not in you or what you are - so you are deprived of it - so now you need to go restore the sense of lack by finding it somewhere ELSE other than in you. You go off hunting for a way to fill the emptiness, which reinforces your belief in the emptiness. And even if you find something, it won't heal the sense of LACK, and you won't accept it, because it's not really what you want. You want yourself back. You want God's love.
The separation of your identity from God's Son leads to:
Seeking outside yourself
Creating sickness
All idol worship
Creating fear
All attack
All victimhood
All loss and grief and loneliness
All sense of abandonment and rejection
Seeing yourself as separate from God and others
Having nothing to depend on ("independence")
Insanity
Not being true to yourself
Seeking for what you lost where it does not exist and not finding it
Losing even more of what you are by being compelled to replace it
A belief that you can die
All vulnerability and sense of threat
Mistrust (in yourself)
All paths efforting to 'find yourself' but remain separate
The spiritualized ego
The inability to share or join
Condemnation and judgement and blame (of yourself)
Shame and guilt for who you are
Unworthiness and unloveability
Suffering and suicide and war (with yourself)
All anger and upset and disasters and terrible events
...And on and on.
Just this one thing. This one idea of - I'm not myself - where am I - who am I - I am separate from what I am - I am not as God created me - leads to all of these other dynamics and activities and perceptions.
You can't have any of them without this one foundation - this sense of separation from yourself. And since you and God are one, it is simultaneously a sense of separation from God.
"A sense of separation from God is the only lack you really need correct." - ACIM
And here's the clincher. Every single one of those things on that list above that you currently believe are caused by all kinds of things OTHER than the ego's foundation, are NOT caused by anything other than the ego's foundation. And so it is the sheer 'fact' of 'being' an ego - separate from the love you are - that causes every single problem you face. All hell comes from it. Being separate from God and your True Self is the ONLY problem that needs correction. All other problems are illusory problems masking the one problem so that you will not correct it.
So each time I am in the ego, in some way I must be believing that I am separate from God and myself. I must be going down some path which tells me it's going to help me RESTORE who I am and what I lost, BUT which will NOT restore it, because the entire NEED for that path comes from believing I LACK what I'm looking to restore, and until I stop beleiving that I won't ever be able to ACCEPT that I HAVE WHAT I REALLY HAVE ALREADY.
You ARE as God Created you. You ARE love already. This you need to accept, and let go of all these other ego pursuits that trick you and lead you away from it. Everyone is being deceived by the ego's suggestions of everything you need to do to 'fix' the separation, which seem to lead you to resolution but in fact lead you to an EVEN WORSE situation. Seek and do not find. Fix and do not correct. Pursue and fail. Search and lose. Try to have and do not have at all. Hold on and lose everything. This is all the ego's deceit.
One error, one correction. Holy Spirit's is the Answer from God because He Knows the solution to this problem - that the problem really IS NOT REAL. You are NOT separate from God or Your Self and the separation NEVER HAPPENED. So you are love. And that is why you need do nothing.
Sanity and awakening is merely a matter of extreme honesty.
Honestly is a willingness to admit to what is true, to accept the truth, to not hide anything. It is visibility and exposure to God.
Honesty flies in the face of things like denial, deception, lies, guilt, shame, fear, confusion, false beliefs, anger, defences, egoic justifications etc.
All the egoic stuff, the false perception stuff, is some form of avoidance of reality, an avoidance of the truth. An unwillingness to admit to something.
In order to push through to reality we have to become ever more honest in admitting to what things are. What we are doing to ourselves.
We use at first a little willingness which then grows into a big willingness. This is a willingness to admit the truth. "Admitting" means to allow access, which opens up the mind to let the truth in. Accepting that truth is honesty - ie, reality as it really is.
The end result is a direct, immediate and accurate perception, which admits only to reality and what is true, and is completely unwilling to go into the various egoic forms of avoidance and distortion.
Honesty is openness, willingness, sanity, recognition, purity, wholeness, awareness. It's a sharp look at what is actually true in preference over all the various forms of dreaming and wishing and denial.
Bit by bit we're stripping away all the ways that we are avoiding the reality of God, avoiding the truth and trying to hide and distort what's there. Honesty reveals to us the "real" world instead of our unreal dishonest world.
It is the proper tool for weeding out all ego motives, all distortions of reality, all denial of God, all unwillingness to accept atonement, all reasons for unforgiveness, all basis for judgment.
Honesty can take you all the way home, as you emerge from the fog of lies and deceit that is the separation from God. End the bullshit, it's time to get real.
"Only within the Holy Instant can an honest question honestly be asked." UrT27E6
"I will be honest with myself today. I will not think that I already know what must remain beyond my present grasp. I will not think I understand the whole from bits of my perception, which are all that I can see. Today I recognize that this is so. And so I am relieved of judgment which I cannot make. Thus do I free myself and what I look upon, to be in peace as God created us." UrW243L1
"Be sure you are honest with yourself in making this distinction. You may be tempted to obscure it." UrW9L3
"Only the trusting can afford honesty, for only they can see its value. Honesty does not apply only to what you say. The term actually means consistency. There is nothing you say that contradicts what you think or do; no thought opposes any other thought; no act belies your word; and no word lacks agreement with another. Such are the truly honest. At no level are they in conflict with themselves. Therefore it is impossible for them to be in conflict with anyone or anything." URM5C1
"The peace of mind which the advanced teachers of God experience is largely due to their perfect honesty. It is only the wish to deceive that makes for war." UrM5C2
"God's teachers do not judge. To judge is to be dishonest, for to judge is to assume a position you do not have." UrM5D1
"True faithfulness, however, does not deviate. Being consistent it is wholly honest." UrM5J2
"For honest thoughts, untainted by the dream of worldly things outside yourself, become the holy messengers of God Himself." UrW188L6
"It is necessary for the teacher of God to realize not that he should not judge, but that he cannot. In giving up judgment he merely gives up what he did not have. He gives up an illusion; or better, he has an illusion of giving up. He has actually merely become more honest." UrM11A2
"You have been as selective in your questioning as in your perception. An open mind is more honest than this." UrT12D3
"Against the littleness you see in him you stand as tall and stately, clean and honest, pure and unsullied by comparison with what you see." UrT24C1
"Leave all illusions of yourself OUTSIDE this place, to which you come in hope and honesty. Here is your Savior FROM your specialness." URT24C10v "Be very honest with yourselves about this, for we must hide nothing from each other." URT4D19
"The search for truth is but the honest searching out of everything that INTERFERES with truth. TRUTH IS. And can be neither lost, nor sought, nor found. It is there, wherever YOU are, being WITHIN you." URT14D2