Arriving at work I encountered my first truck load of live pigs on their way to the sausage factory across the street. It was a double-decker piggy wagon complete with air holes and little pink piggy bits poking out and wiggling around. As I realized what it was, and that it was about to pull into the bacon death machine, I had a reaction.

The reaction felt like sadness coupled with anger. The anger felt like wanting to go stop it, and the sadness felt like the pigs didn't know what was about to happen to them - that they were going to be victimized. Regardless of what was happening, I was having a reaction so now I have to do a fricking forgiveness.

Ok.

So obviously my perception is mistaken, otherwise I wouldn't be upset. It's impossible to be upset about the truth. My perception was showing me that the pigs were helpless victims with no power and seemingly innocent. A voice in my mind, perhaps Jesus, said

"they know what's going to happen". But this didn't necessarily stop me reacting. Truth is though, on some higher level they do know because nothing happens but by choice, and it was really me that was having a dark experience.

So... by seeing the pigs as `innocent victims` with `nasty ego power` being wielded over them against their will, it was a strong contrast showing me where I believe certain things. And it's not about the piggies, because both the pigs and the sausage makers are part of the same ego thought system. The pigs only appear to be victims because I don't see that they chose this, and the sausage folk only seem like victimizers because I think they do something to the pigs they didn't ask for.

And what's this got to do with me? Always it's something to do with me and nothing really to do with them. I'm not upset because of the pigs. I'm not upset because of the bacon fest. I'm upset because it's showing me that I already have something in me, in my mind, which believes in something incorrect, and it's triggering it off. It's not about them, it's about me. I have to withdraw all blame from the pig mongers and also withdraw all projection of victimhood from the piggies.

The piggies are not victims. The farmers are not victimizers. The greasy sausage folk are innocent. They don't even really exist. They're not really out there. It's a dream. I'm dreaming it. So....

That means I made up this whole scenario. I made pigs. I made sausages. I made bacon factories. So secretly this reminds me that I actually made up this whole thing myself which would mean I am guilty. So the guilt I see in them is my own guilt. Hmm.

Hmm. Ok. I am flashed a memory of a time in childhood when I used to hunt butterflies, ... and kill them. I used to swat them with a tennis racket, or capture them and keep them a while but then they died because I didn't feed them etc. Or even perhaps would stick a pin in them. Vicious! ooo.. juicy pool of guilt there. I didn't know what I was doing, so it's forgivable.

So even though I made that mistake and I secretly covet bacon and sausages and want to stick a pin in the pigs, its only because I have lost touch with the truth of who I am. I forgot I am love. I forgot I am holy and innocent and have no needs. I forgot God loves me. So.. .I'm just mistaken about being guilty. Even if I did nasty things to innocent creatures, I'm still innocent because I am not in my right mind. So I'm making mistakes and not realizing it. I'm not to blame. The butterflies forgive me. I forgive me. I am forgiven not for what I have done but because... I have not really done it.

This is a dream, it hasn't happened. I'm with God. I am guiltless and sinless. I haven't done anything to anyone. God is not harmed. Real immortal life has not been changed. I have not stopped being perfect love. I am absolutely forgivable and innocent and free. God loves me 100% because he knows that pigs and butterflies are just parts of a dream that has no meaning and I gave it all the meaning it had. I used the pigs and pig farmers as skapegoats to project my own guilt so that I would have a reason to justify being guilty, which would help me to stay away from God. I wanted to be away from God so I could keep my ego and not be loved.

So... do I want to keep suffering? Am I willing to let this go? Can I let go and surrender this need to prove I am guilty? Yes.. I willingly surrender this guilt and recognize I am forgiven, I claim and own up to being innocent because none of this really happened. God loves me. Nothing has gone wrong. Nothing has died. Death isn't real. Everyone is equally innocent and holy. Only love is real.

Holy Spirit, please heal my mind and correct my thinking and remove all of this guilt and help me to remember my true innocent and that of all concerned. I let it go. I accept your truth.

Amen.

Here is Jesus talking about how as you enter the real world (not heaven), the physical world is now seen as SHADOWS, which SEEMED SOLID, which now appear TRANSPARENT AND FAINT, at times FORGOT.

"Christ's vision is the bridge between the worlds. And in its power can you safely trust to carry you from this world into one made holy by forgiveness. ****Things which seem quite solid here are merely shadows there; transparent, faintly seen, at times forgot, and never able to obscure the light that shines beyond them.**** Holiness has been restored to vision, and the blind can see."

And he goes on elsewhere to speak of how the body is diminisihed in your sight...

"Across the bridge it is so different! For a time the body is still seen, but not exclusively, as it is seen here. The little spark that holds the Great Rays within it is also visible, and this spark cannot be limited long to littleness. Once you have crossed the bridge, ****the value of the body is so diminished in your sight**** that you will see no need at all to magnify it."

And again, the world is regarded as nothing but a thin veil, an illusion of smoke and mirrors, hanging before the face of christ, which can be easily brushed aside.

"The world stands like a block before Christ's face. But true perception looks on it as ****nothing more than just a fragile veil, so easily dispelled that it can last no longer than an instant.**** It is seen at last for only what it is. And ****now it cannot fail to disappear,**** for now there is an empty place made clean and ready. Where destruction was perceived the face of Christ appears, and in that instant ****is the world forgot****, with time forever ended as ****the world spins into nothingness from where it came.****" The body becomes a shadow, circling around the good, no longer obscuring sight of the real world.

"By focusing upon the good in him, ***the body grows decreasingly persistent in your sight***, and will at length be seen as ***little more than just a shadow circling round the good.*** And this will be your concept of yourself, when you have reached the world beyond the sight your eyes alone can offer you to see. For you will not interpret what you see without the Aid that God has given you. And in His sight there is another world."

And the veil is brushed aside...

"The fourth obstacle to be surmounted (fear of death) hangs like a heavy veil before the face of Christ. Yet as His face rises beyond it, shining with joy because He is in His Father's Love, ****peace will lightly brush the veil aside**** and run to meet Him, and to join with Him at last. For this dark veil, which seems to make the face of Christ Himself like to a leper's, and the bright Rays of His Father's Love that light His face with glory appear as streams of blood, fades in the blazing light beyond it when the fear of death is gone."

nb: "The world is a picture of the crucifixion of God's Son" Attracted by what is beyond the veil... YOU WILL LEAVE THE WORLD FOREVER!

"It seems to you the world will utterly abandon you if you but raise your eyes. ****Yet all that will occur is you will leave the world forever.**** This is the re-establishment of your will. Look upon it, open-eyed, and you will nevermore believe that you are at the mercy of things beyond you, forces you cannot control, and thoughts that come to you against your will. It is your will to look on this. No mad desire, no trivial impulse to forget again, no stab of fear nor the cold sweat of seeming death can stand against your will. For what attracts you from beyond the veil is also deep within you, unseparated from it and completely one."

Bodies, the Earth, the Sun, all the stars, all the galaxies, will vanish, because they are an illusion and not of God. This will mark the "disappearance of the universe". And all that will remain is the Kingdom of God, which was there before spacetime was ever dreamed of. And not one single thing which appeared to come into existence will exist in any way, and will simply fade into nothing without a trace. No-one needs the world except to help us to leave it behind and go home.

"Together we can watch the world disappear and its symbol vanish as it does so." (Special messages 19)

"Like all things in the world its meaning is temporary, and will ultimately fade into the nothingness from which it came when there is no more use for it." UrM14A1

"Let us today behold earth disappear, at first transformed, and then, forgiven, fade entirely into God's holy Will." UrW326L4

"in that instant is the world forgot, with time forever ended as the world spins into nothingness from where it came." UrU5A4

"When not one thought of sin remains, the world is over. It will not be destroyed nor attacked nor even touched. It will merely cease to seem to be." UrM15A2

"An unremembered world will leave no trace behind its going, when God's gifts have been accepted as the only thing you want." UrG1A8

"Idols MUST disappear, and leave no trace behind their going." UrT20G9

"The world you see is an illusion of a world. God did not create it, for what He creates must be eternal as Himself. Yet there is nothing in the world you see that will endure forever. Some things will last in time a little while longer than others. But the time will come when all things visible will have an end." UrU5A1

"To close all things of time, to end the sight

Of all things visible; and to undo

All things that change." UrM30A8

"Heaven remains your one alternative to this strange world you made and all its ways; its shifting patterns and uncertain goals, its painful pleasures and its tragic joys. God made no contradictions. What denies its own existence and attacks itself is not of Him. He did not make two minds, with Heaven as the glad effect of one, and earth the other's sorry outcome which is Heaven's opposite in every way." UrW137L1

"Where destruction was perceived the face of Christ appears, and in that instant is the world forgot, with time forever ended as the world spins into nothingness from where it came." UrU5A4

"The song of our rejoicing is the call to all the world that freedom is returned, that time is almost over, and God's Son has but an instant more to wait until his Father is remembered, dreams are done, eternity has shined away the world, and only Heaven now exists at all." UrW230W25

"The goal of the curriculum, regardless of the teacher you choose, is KNOW THYSELF. ***There is nothing else to learn. Everyone is looking for himself*** and the power and glory he thinks he has lost."

"For everyone is seeking to escape from the prison he has made, and the way to find release is not denied him."

It's strange to realize that you don't remember who you really are. Your mind is in a state of confusion. You are lost and seemingly alone in darkness. You've forgotten what is true of you, your true nature, or what you are really like.

Your real identity seems to have become buried underneath the rubble of the ego thought system's destructiveness. You seek in the darkness for yourself, trying to sort through the clues which may point in the direction of yourself. Yet you don't even remember what your self is actually like, so can't quite tell what it is you're looking for.

In the separation from God you denied your soul, and blocked awareness of your real identity as Christ. You forgot who you were. Jesus even goes to the extent to say that because of the authority problem, in which you rejected God as your father, you actually believe that you don't exist at all.

Yet everyone is trying to find the self that they lost. We're all searching for some sense of something we once knew, but can't quite remember. Some self that was, and still is, our true reality, but which has become so obscure that we're not even sure where to look.

Some have a notion of a higher self, as if the soul is some other secondary self. And this is only because the ego that you have become identified with instead is a secondary sense of self. But it is not yourself. It is not who you are, and nor is your body.

Your "higher" self isn't really higher, nor does it really have a separate mind of its own. It isn't a second you, but rather, your first and only you. It's who you are deep down. The you that is true to yourself. The you that is actual and permanent and unconfused, uncluttered with illusions and unblocked by denial. It's your spiritual holy self.

If you reach into your mind, recognizing that the ego you've latched onto is not yourself, and with willingness to go beyond the body which is also not yourself, you can search within (or above) for your soul. Reach out to it, or rather, to you. Dig deeper behind the clouds of denial and the blocks to awareness. Who are you really?

Somewhere in your mind, there is awareness of the real self that you are. The most honest direct self, simple and pure and strong. The self that you forgot. The self that you have trouble remembering. The self you used to be before the confusion of separation set in. Who are you really, behind all these masks and disguises? What are you really like? Where is your soul?

The real world is not this world. It is not planet Earth. Nor is it in fact the same thing as the forgiven world.

The real world is a "borderland of thought" which is IN BETWEEN this world and heaven. It is a transcendental state in which there are no physical objects, bodies, planets, streets, cities etc. No space or time or matter.

In a sense, it is a kind of layer of almost-oneness, underlying or behind all physical matter, yet still slightly outside of heaven. You could almost think of it as the 'container' which houses space, time and galaxies. It is a singular REFLECTION of heaven's oneness.

"There is a borderland of thought that stands ****BETWEEN this world (earth) and Heaven.****"

"Christ's vision is the BRIDGE BETWEEN the worlds. "

The real world is not space or time or within spacetime or having anything to do with matter or objects or bodies or planets. It transcends both space and time is a universal singular state.

"It is not a place, and WHEN you reach it is APART from time."

"This borderland is just beyond the gate of Heaven. Here is every thought made pure and wholly simple. Here is sin denied, and everything that IS, received instead.

Given that "The world of bodies is the world of sin", and thus because sin is denied, THE WORLD OF BODIES IS DENIED in the real world. This is why there are no bodies there.

"For where God's memory has come at last there is no journey, no belief in sin, no walls, no bodies"

This is the journey's end. We have referred to it as the "real world."" In the state of this real world, which is an inclusive state of accurate perception, the "world of illusions" which comprises a VEIL hanging over the face of christ, is seen as a SHADOW swirling around. It is transparent and fading and even at times forgotten.

"The world (earth) stands like a block before Christ's face. But true perception looks on it as ****nothing more than just a fragile veil, so easily dispelled that it can last no longer than an instant."***

"**** It is seen at last for only what it is. And ****now it cannot fail to disappear,****

"Things which seem quite solid here (in physical reality ie Earth etc) ***are merely shadows there; transparent, faintly seen, at times forgot****, and never able to obscure the light that shines beyond them."

"For a time the body is still seen, but not exclusively, as it is seen here (on earth)."

"Where destruction was perceived the face of Christ appears, and in that instant ****is the world forgot****, with time forever ended as ****the world spins into nothingness from where it came.****"

"***the body grows decreasingly persistent in your sight***, and will at length be seen as ***little more than just a shadow circling round the good.***"

"****peace will lightly brush the veil aside****"

The veil, is the veil of the separation, the gap, the mad idea, space and time, the world we made, hell, earth, all galaxies and stars, the whole seeming content of the physical universe, all bodies, all creatures made of flesh, and all notions of beginnings and endings. It is a regarded as A SHADOW because it is made of darkness, being the idea of the opposition to the world of light.

If you think of the real world as a bucket of pure water, spacetime is swirling around in the water like an impurity. Some dark substance which is mixed in with it. Those who know the water is the reflection of purity, are not deceived by the impurity and recognize it as alien and false and unreal and an illusion.

The veil which hangs over the face of christ is the entire contents of spacetime, which was made to come between you and your brother. It is literally all walls, all flesh, all bodies, all surfaces, all matter. It hangs like a veil because it was made to separate you from yourself, and to come between christ and God. The world WITHIN the veil is a world of illusions. That includes planet Earth. The veil is not drawn ACROSS the earth, it IS the earth.

Eventually the veil itself completely vanishes, becoming utterly transparent. It is recognized as purely an illusion, and disappears from sight. For a moment, only the real world remains to be perceived, as the world is FORGOTTEN and returns to NOTHINGNESS. The reflection of heaven is complete and christ's face emerges as a symbol of the end of separation. THEN the mind crosses fully over the bridge, beyond the borderland, through the gates of heaven, and into heaven itself.

So what is the forgiven world? The forgiven world is the VEIL, the illusory realm, the shadow world, which includes earth and all galaxies, which is seen in a forgiving way from the perspective of the real world. It is not awarded any sense of reality or sin or attack or guilt, because the real world is a loving state of mind. But AT THE SAME TIME, it is also RECOGNIZED AS FALSE, unreal, and not really existing. It is the awareness of dreaming, that this world IS A DREAM.

"A world forgiven cannot last. It was the home of bodies." Anything you forgive disappears, because you can ONLY forgive illusions. If you forgive the earth, IT MUST disappear. You cannot forgive it if it is reality. The forgiven world is the veil that interferes with christ, the real world is christ's vision which recognizes the veil as nothing but a dream, and ultimate reality is solely heaven itself, beyond both the forgiven world and the real world.

"The real world still is but a dream." "Even the real world will vanish from your site." "Heaven is all that remains."

"Who but yourself evaluates a threat, decides escape is necessary, and sets up a series of defenses to reduce the threat that has been judged as real? All this cannot be done unconsciously. But afterwards, your plan requires that you must forget you made it, so it seems to be external to your own intent; a happening beyond your state of mind, an outcome with a real effect on you, instead of one effected by yourself.

It is this quick forgetting of the part you play in making your "reality" that makes defenses seem to be beyond your own control."

- ACIM - sickness is a defense against the truth... Here Jesus describes how we create sickness.

We evaluate that the truth is a threat (to our ego truth), we decide we need to defend against it, so we create a sickness by making it real and doing it to ourselves, yet making it look like we didn't choose it. Jesus goes on to say...

"But what you have forgot can be remembered".

He also says:

"Defenses must make facts unrecognizable. They aim at doing this, and it is this they do."

and

"And yet you have forgotten that they stand but for your own decision of what should be real, to take the place of what is real."

i.e. sickness is an attempt to obscure the truth and make it unrecognizable by associating truth with something illusory. Sickness is illusory, so regarding it as truth obscures what the truth really is.

and ie... you use sickness to convert reality to untruth and illusions to reality.

We need to then remember we did this and uncover what the truth really is, to bring about healing.

Maybe it's your hair, the shape of your face, or some other body part. Maybe it's how you speak. Maybe it's the way you walk or where you came from.

In one way or another, you probably walk around with layer upon layer of not being what someone somewhere thinks you should be.

You might think you are dysfunctional, or broken, or defective, or incapable, or somehow just fundamentally flawed. People might treat you like you're disabled, less than them, or inferior.

The problem isn't so much that other people are constantly bombarding you with these judgements, but that you've accepted them for yourself as though they are true of you. You believe in them and make them your identity, even if it hurts.

But this also means you have the choice, whether to let go of this false sense of worth and identity, or whether to hold on a while longer.

What if these views that you have of yourself are not really true about you? What if there's really nothing wrong with you at all? What if everyone has been mistaken about you, but even moreso, you've been mistaken about yourself?

What if you're still just as worthy and valuable to God as you always have been, and you just forgot for a while, thinking you were no longer acceptable?

Love loves you unconditionally forever and ever and ever. You are worthy of God's love, right now. You don't have to earn it. It's being offered unconditionally and freely without any strings attached.

Let yourself be loved.

This is a slight technicality which the ego forgot to mention.

If you knew and could see that any attempt you make to influence or hurt or affect another, immediately has direct repercussions upon yourself, and that it is absolutely impossible to escape ANY of the effects, then you would have no choice but to always love.

It is ONLY because you do not see, ie are not aware, that this is true, and applies in every situation, that you think it's possible to get away with one set of rules applying to someone else that does not apply to you. Or that you can cause something without experiencing the effects.

The ego is entirely based on this idea that you are not equal to your brother in some way, that they can be the one who is a sinner and not you.

This creates the tremendous illusion, commonly believed-in by most of the planet, that you literally can attack or judge or harm or condemn without having any side effects whatseover.

This is false. It is not true at all.

You could call it karma. It's not pay-back. It's not compensation. It's the simply fact that WHATEVER you do, you WILL do it to yourself and everyone.

"Whatever you do unto the least of my brothers you do unto me" ... or something like that. Every way you treat everyone else, you are treating Jesus and God the same way.

Not necessarily that they will receive the treatment you are dishing out, but you will believe they are.

What applies to others applies to you. At all times.

There are no loopholes. There is no exit clause. There are no workarounds. There is no hope of being especially skilled or capable or clever or imaginative in how you figure out how to cheat the system. The system is not cheatable. God's laws are pemanent.

This is what "shared interests" are all about. You, being literally one with your brother, SHARE everything with them, and therefore receive everything you give.

This is also why giving and receiving are one. What you give you will receive.

ACIM should've started out with a really explicit statement like "planet earth does not exist, human bodies do not exist, and space and time do not exist." You know, for all those stubborn and delusional folk who continually cling to them and insist that they do. Oh wait...

"Yet it can be but an illusion, because time does not exist "

"The body does not really exist"

"And gone are bodies in the blazing light upon the altar to the Son of God."

"A no time does the body really exist."

"The body is the symbol of WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE. It is clearly a separation device, and therefore does not exist."

"Let us today behold earth disappear" "There is no world."

"And once all guilt is gone what more remains to keep a separated world in place? For place has gone as well, along with time. "

"and in that instant is the world forgot, with time forever ended as the world spins into nothingness from where it came."

"God did not make the body, because it is destructible, and therefore not of the Kingdom."

"the sorry gifts of earth are joyously relinquished"

"The sky embraces it, and softly holds it in its perfect place, which is as far from earth as earth from Heaven."

"Yet he whom I forgive will give me gifts beyond the worth of anything on earth."

"Time remains only to let the last embrace of prayer rest on the earth an instant, as the world is shined away. This instant is the goal of all true healers"

"The little things of earth have disappeared."

"The stars will disappear in light, and the sun, which opened up the world to beauty, will vanish."

"The world you see is an illusion of a world. God did not create it." ... "The time will come when all things visible will have an end."

"There is nothing on earth with which it can compare, and nothing you have ever felt, APART from Him, that resembles it ever so faintly."

"The things of earth are left behind, all unremembered."

"How could there be a meeting place at all where earth and Heaven can be reconciled within a mind where both of them exist?"

"The body is the symbol of the world. Leave it behind. It cannot enter Heaven. But I can take you there anytime you choose. Together we can watch the world disappear and its symbol vanish as it does so."

"The world can ADD nothing to the power and the glory of God and His Holy Sons, but it CAN blind the Sons to the Father if they behold it. You cannot behold the world and know God."

"earth the other's sorry outcome which is Heaven's opposite in every way"

"Without the idea of death there is no world. All dreams will end with this one."

"Others find it in experience that is not of this world, which shows them that the world does not exist because what they behold must be the truth, and yet it clearly contradicts the world."

"Today's idea is true because the world does not exist."

"What if you recognized this world is a hallucination? What if you REALLY understood you made it up? What if you realized that those who SEEM to walk about in it, to sin and die, attack and murder and destroy themselves, are WHOLLY unreal?"

"The real world is the second part of the hallucination time and death are real, and have existence which can be perceived. This terrible illusion was denied in but the time it took for God to give His Answer to illusion for ALL time and EVERY circumstance."

The main reason why you automatically assume that other people do stuff to you, and that it affects you, is because you assume that you are currently aware of the entire content of your own mind.

Your little 'conscious self' believes that everything about you, everything that is in you, you must be conscious of right now. If you're not conscious of it, you believe it does not exist and is not a part of you, except that maybe you accept you have 'memories' stored somewhere. But you don't generally accept that you have 'reactions' stored somewhere, or 'wounds', or 'emotional content'.

This is how most of us perceive and engage and live our lives, as little conscious selves that believe we are fully aware of every part of ourselves, as though any and all previous trauma or upset simply does not exist in you anymore.

So then what happens is, someone comes along and offers to be a victimizer and does something 'to you'. You refer to your vast catalog of immediate personal awarewness and you do not have awareness of anything `in you` that even remotely resembles upsets, guilts, fears, sins, hurts, pains, unhappiness, grief, etc. All you're currently aware of is your present mood and a handful of thoughts and that's about it.

So this person does something and all of a sudden, inside you there appears a big giant elephant made of guilt and fear. It feels terrible. It came out of NOWHERE! And because it was not there before, you're pretty sure that must mean the victimizer PUT IT THERE or caused it to be there. You don't even think it is YOUR upset. Everything about it is their fault because, if this whole scenario is the truth, and if this content was not in you previously, then obviously it MUST be their fault.

So this is our default ego reaction mode. Stuff just pops into our experience internally that we're convinced was not there before, and it doesn't feel good, so we blame its 'creation' on someone else - they are the cause.

So when you look at it, this all stems from the fact that you have a stinking heap of shit LURKING in your mind, OUTSIDE your awareness, unconsciously lingering in the background. Out of sight, out of mind. Its hidden behind denial and repression and suppression. It's covered over with layer upon layer of rejection and avoidance. And each layer of it conceals and hides even more deeper layers that you don't even realize are `in there`.

If it weren't for this unconsciousness, and if you were fully aware right now of the ENTIRE content of your mind, and if someone came along and 'did something to you', you would immediately know that NOTHING CHANGED. Your content was already there. All your guilts and hurts and fears were already there in your awareness and you were already experiencing them fully. The person did not add anything, so that means.... you know they are innocent.

Long story short.... you blame everyone and everything for your own experience of life because they keep causing your own stuff to come into your awareness and you FORGOT it was there, because you buried it and hoped it would go away. Other people come along to RE-MIND you - to get you to look at your shit and become aware of the stuff you DO NOT WANT, so that you will actually take productive steps to really heal it and undo your belief in it being true.

So everyone is just trying to help you. Everything is for your benefit. And for that you can be grateful.

Someday when you are done purifying your mind, releasing old pain, healing wounds and undoing all trace that anything even seemed to happen at all, you WILL be walking around in FULL awareness of all of yourself, because you will be awake. And you WILL know that everyone is innocent, and you will know that nobody can add to or take away from what is already in you.