26) "My attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability."
How can I know who I am when I see myself as under constant attack? Pain, illness, loss, age and death seem to threaten me. All my hopes and wishes and plans appear to be at the mercy of a world I cannot control. Yet perfect security and complete fulfillment are my inheritance. I have tried to give my inheritance away in exchange for the world I see. But God has kept my inheritance safe for me. My own real thoughts will teach me what it is.
27) "Above all else I want to see."
Recognizing that what I see reflects what I think I am, I realize that vision is my greatest need. The world I see attests to the fearful nature of the self-image I have made. If I would remember who I am, it is essential that I let this image of myself go. As it is replaced by truth, vision will surely be given me. And with this vision I will look upon the world and upon myself with charity and love.
28) "Above all else I want to see differently."
The world I see holds my fearful self-image in place, and guarantees its continuance. While I see the world as I see it now, truth cannot enter my awareness. I would let the door behind this world be opened for me, that I may look past it to the world that reflects the Love of God.
29) "God is in everything I see."
Behind every image I have made, the truth remains unchanged. Behind every veil I have drawn across the face of love, its light remains undimmed. Beyond all my insane wishes is my will united with the Will of my Father. God is still everywhere and in everything forever. And we who are part of Him will yet look past all appearances, and recognize the truth beyond them all.
30) "God is in everything I see because God is in my mind."
In my own mind, behind all my insane thoughts of separation and attack, is the knowledge that all is one forever. I have not lost the knowledge of who I am because I have forgotten it. It has been kept for me in the Mind of God, Who has not left His Thoughts. And I, who am among them, am one with them and with Him.
I woke up in the night last night with terrible heartburn. It was so uncomfortable, I was ready to get in the car and go to the store to get something for it. Probably the strongest and worst heartburn I've ever had.
I thought I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep because it was way too unpleasant and I had to do *something* about it.
In the middle of that concern, in which I thought I definitely would need an external magical solution, Holy Spirit started shaking me and healing me.
I did not believe at first that He would be able to correct it. It seemed too strong and definitely "physical". But He kept doing the same process over and over for like 5 minutes or more. My body was shaking all over the place and I just surrendered, relaxed and allowed.
Surprisingly, it seemed to be improving. He kept going. And eventually it got to where it really felt like it had completely healed. I was in a bit of disbelief. My fearful thoughts hadn't quite caught up to what had happened.
But there I was, the Holy Spirit said "done", and all I could feel was stillness and peace. The roaring heartburn soreness had been completely healed. I got up and walked around a bit to test it. I then tentatively headed back to bed, not being able to find any trace of discomfort.
And then I started to experience bigtime gratitude for this healing. Part of my ego mind couldn't quite let go of the belief that it was healed and kept wanting to fear its return, but it was nonsense. It was gone.
Thank God for that :-)
Although these things are unpleasant to go through, they definitely are a way to increase trust in Holy Spirit and His miracle-working power.
Forgiveness is the means appointed for perception's ending. Knowledge is restored after perception first is changed, and then gives way entirely to what remains forever past its highest reach. For sights and sounds, at best, can serve but to recall the memory that lies beyond them all. Forgiveness sweeps away distortions, and opens the hidden altar to the truth. Its lilies shine into the mind, and call it to return and look within, to find what it has vainly sought without. For here, and only here, is peace of mind restored, for this the dwelling-place of God Himself.
"In quiet may forgiveness wipe away my dreams of separation and of sin. Then let me, Father, look within and find Your promise of my sinlessness is kept; Your Word remains unchanged within my mind, Your Love is still abiding in my heart."
I seek my own identity, and find it in these words: "Love, Which created me, is what I am." Now need I seek no more. Love has prevailed. So still it waited for my coming home, that I will turn away no longer from the holy face of Christ. And what I look upon attests the truth of the identity I sought to lose, but which my Father has kept safe for me.
"Father, my thanks to You for what I am; for keeping my identity untouched and sinless in the midst of all the thoughts of sin my foolish mind made up. And thanks to You for saving me from them. Amen." W(472)
If you will lay aside the ego's voice however loudly it may seem to call; if you will not accept its petty gifts which give you nothing that you really want; if you will listen with an open mind which has not told you what salvation is; then you will hear the mighty Voice of truth, quiet in power, strong in stillness, and completely certain in Its messages. Listen, and hear your Father speak to you through His appointed Voice, Which silences the thunder of the meaningless, and shows the way to peace to those who cannot see.
Be still today and listen to the truth. Be not deceived by voices of the dead which tell you they have found the source of life, and offer it to you for your belief. Attend them not, but listen to the truth. Be not afraid today to circumvent the voices of the world. Walk lightly past their meaningless persuasion. Hear them not.
Be still today and listen to the truth. Go past all things which do not speak of Him Who holds your happiness within His hand, held out to you in welcome and in love. Hear only Him today, and do not wait to reach Him longer. Hear one Voice today.
Today the promise of God's Word is kept. Hear and be silent. He would speak to you. He comes with miracles a thousand times as happy and as wonderful as those you ever dreamt or wished for in your dreams. His miracles are true. They will not fade when dreaming ends. They end the dream instead, and last forever for they come from God, to His dear Son, whose other name is you. Prepare yourself for miracles today. Today allow your Father's ancient pledge to you and all your brothers to be kept.
Hear Him today, and listen to the Word which lifts the veil which lies upon the earth, and wakes all those who sleep and cannot see. God calls to them through you. He needs your voice to speak to them, for who could reach God's Son except his Father calling through your Self?
Hear Him today, and offer Him your voice to speak to all the multitudes who wait to hear the Word that He will speak today. Be ready for salvation. It is here, and will today be given unto you. And you will learn your function from the One Who shows it in your Father's Name for you.
Listen today, and you will hear a Voice Which will resound throughout the world through you. The Bringer of all miracles has need that you receive them first, and thus become the joyous giver of what you received. Thus does salvation start and thus it ends; when everything is yours, and everything is given away, it will remain with you forever. And the lesson has been learned.
Today we practice giving, not the way you understand it now, but as it is. The longer exercises should begin with this request for your enlightenment:
"I will be still and listen for the truth.
What does it mean to give and to receive?"
Ask and expect an answer. Your request is one whose answer has been waiting long to be received by you. It will begin the ministry for which you came, and which will free the world from thinking giving is a way to lose. And so the world becomes ready to understand and to receive.
Be still and listen to the truth today. For each five minutes spent in listening a thousand minds are opened to the truth, and they will hear the holy Word you hear. And when the hour is past, you will again release a thousand more who pause to ask that truth be given them, along with you.
Today the holy Word of God is kept through your receiving it to give away, so you can teach the world what giving means by listening and learning it of Him. Do not forget today to reinforce your choice to hear and to receive the Word by your reminder, given to yourself as often as is possible today:
"Let me be still and listen to the truth.
I am the messenger of God today,
My voice is His, to give what I receive."
The journey that we undertake together is the change of dark for light, of ignorance for understanding. NOTHING YOU UNDERSTAND IS FEARFUL. It is only in darkness and in ignorance that you perceive the frightening, and you shrink away from it to further darkness. And yet, it is only the hidden that CAN terrify, NOT for what it IS, but FOR its hiddenness. The obscure is frightening, BECAUSE you do not understand its meaning. If you did, IT would be clear, and you would be no longer in the dark. Nothing has HIDDEN value, for what is hidden CANNOT be shared, and so its value is unknown. The hidden is KEPT APART, but value ALWAYS lies in joint appreciation. What is concealed CANNOT be loved, and so it MUST be feared.
The quiet light in which the Holy Spirit dwells within you, is merely perfect openness, in which nothing is hidden, and therefore nothing is feared. Attack will ALWAYS yield to love, if it is brought TO love, not hidden FROM it. There is no darkness that the light of love will not dispel, unless it is concealed from love's beneficence. What is KEPT APART from love CANNOT share its healing power, because it has been separated off, and KEPT IN DARKNESS. The sentinels of darkness watch over it carefully, and you who made these guardians of illusion out of nothing, are now AFRAID of them.
Would you continue to give imagined power to these strange ideas of safety? They are neither safe nor unsafe. They do not protect, NEITHER DO THEY ATTACK. They DO nothing at all, BEING nothing at all. As guardians of darkness and of ignorance, look to them ONLY for fear, for what they keep obscure IS fearful. But let them go, and what WAS fearful, will be so no longer. Without protection of obscurity, ONLY the light of love remains, for only this HAS meaning, and CAN live in light. Everything else MUST disappear.
Death yields to life, simply because destruction IS NOT TRUE. The light of guiltlessness shines guilt away because, when they are BROUGHT TOGETHER, the truth of one MUST make the falsity of its OPPOSITE perfectly clear. Keep not guilt and guiltlessness APART, for your belief that you can HAVE THEM BOTH, is meaningless. All you have done by keeping them apart is LOSE THEIR MEANING, by confusing them with each other. And so you do not realize that only one means ANYTHING, and the other is wholly without sense of ANY kind.
You have interpreted the separation as a means which you have made for BREAKING your communication with your Father. The Holy Spirit re-interprets it as a means of re-establishing what has NOT been broken, but HAS been made obscure. All things you made have use to Him, for His most holy purpose. He KNOWS you are not separate from God, but He perceives much in your mind that lets you THINK you are. All this, and nothing else, would He separate FROM you. The power of decision, which you made IN PLACE of power of creation, He would teach you how to use ON YOUR BEHALF. You who made it to crucify yourselves, must learn of Him how to apply it to the holy cause of restoration.
You who speak in dark and devious symbols, do not understand the language you have made. It HAS no meaning, for its purpose is NOT communication, but rather, the DISRUPTION of communication. If the purpose of language IS communication, how can this tongue mean ANYTHING? Yet even this strange and twisted effort to communicate through NOT communicating, holds enough of love to MAKE IT MEANINGFUL, IF ITS INTERPRETER IS NOT ITS MAKER. You who made it are but expressing CONFLICT, from which the Holy Spirit would RELEASE you. Leave what you would communicate to Him. He will interpret it to you with perfect clarity, for He knows with Whom you ARE in perfect communication.
You know not what you say, and so you know not what is said to you. But your Interpreter perceives the meaning in your alien language. He will not attempt to communicate the meaningless. But He WILL separate out all that HAS meaning, dropping off all the rest, and offering your true communication to those who would communicate as truly WITH you. YOU SPEAK TWO LANGUAGES AT ONCE, and this MUST lead to unintelligibility. But if one means nothing, and the other EVERYTHING, only that one is possible for purposes of communication. The other but INTERFERES with it.
The Holy Spirit's function is ENTIRELY communication. He therefore MUST remove whatever INTERFERES with it, in order to RESTORE it. Therefore, keep no source of interference from His sight, for He will NOT attack your sentinels. But bring them TO Him, and let His gentleness teach you that, in the light, they are not fearful, and CANNOT serve to guard the dark doors behind which nothing at all is carefully concealed. We must open all doors, and let the light come streaming through. There are no hidden chambers in God's Temple. Its gates are open wide, to greet His Son. No-one can fail to come where God has called him, if he close not the door himself upon His Father's welcome.
In A Course in Miracles, Jesus speaks of the face of innocence. This is an aspect of the ego identity which tends to side with "positivity" and "being good" and "people pleasing" and trying to portray itself as innocent, harmless, even weak and frail. This face of innocence is "the innocent victim", and sides with victims. The illusion of innocence is there to cover up secret hidden desires to attack and victimize. And the innocent face is a way to pretend you are not the cause of anything that happens.
In psychological terms the face of innocence is what we also call "the persona". It's part of the split mind. It's a device we use to only accept that which appears to be acceptable, positive, good, desirable, etc. But it also acts like a knife, splitting the mind and rejecting parts that it finds not good enough. It is in fact a way that the mind attacks itself by identifying aspects which are unacceptable and dissociating from them. This places them into the "shadow" behind walls of denial (blocks to awareness). It is perfectionistic, because it always asserts that you are not perfect enough.
Jesus: "The concept of the self the world would teach is not the thing that it appears to be. For it is made to serve two purposes, but one of which the mind can recognize. The first presents the face of innocence, the aspect acted ON. It is this face that smiles and charms and even seems to love. It searches for companions, and it looks at times with pity on the suffering, and sometimes offers solace. It believes that it is good, within an evil world. This aspect can grow angry, for the world is wicked, and unable to provide the love and shelter innocence deserves. And so this face is often wet with tears, at the injustices the world accords to those who would be generous and good."
"This aspect NEVER makes the first attack. But every day a hundred little things make small assaults upon its innocence, provoking it to irritation, and at last to open insult and abuse."
He goes on to describe how this face of innocence covers up a terrible secret. That behind this "special love" there is "special hate". Underlying the face of innocence and the innocent victim, is an attack and judgement and condemnation. And in it, others stand accused of sinning against you. The face becomes a way to portray oneself as "at the effect of the world", such that if it appears to be the innocent party, then others must stand accused at the slightest provocation. It is a device for scapegoating.
"Beneath the face of innocence there is a lesson that the concept of the self was made to teach. It is a lesson in a terrible displacement, and a fear so devastating that the face which smiles above it must forever look away, lest it perceive the treachery it hides. The lesson teaches this; "I am the thing you made of me, and as you look on me you stand condemned, because of what I am." On this conception of the self the world smiles with approval, for it guarantees the pathways of the world are safely kept, and those who walk on them will not escape."
Behind the innocent face therefore, there is a hidden accusation that others are sinful, and the face is held up as a mask ready to "receive" their attack, like a trap. The face is easily offended and easily upset by the world and the acts of others, as it was designed to be. It is produced by the condemnation of oneself, the partitioning off of parts of self as "evil", hiding this from ones own awareness (in the shadow) and then projecting it onto others. Thus behind the face of innocence there is judgement and condemnation, unforgiveness and victimization of others.
"Here is the central lesson that ensures your brother is condemned eternally. For what YOU are has now become his sin. For this is no forgiveness possible. No longer does it matter what he does, for your accusing finger points to him, unwavering and deadly in its aim. It points to you as well, but this is kept still deeper in the mists below the face of innocence. And in these shrouded vaults are all his sins and yours preserved, and kept in darkness, where they cannot be perceived as errors, which the light would surely show. "
False innocence is not real innocence. It's a mask that people wear to pretend to be spiritual or holier than thou. It is not authentic and isn't your self. It's a disguise, designed to make you look like the innocent one so that you are not identified as the source of guilt. Always the ego takes steps to DENY what it does, to deny your soul, to deny even that you sinned, to deny that you are even guilty, resulting in the production of a facade which hides your own guilt from you. You will then "look" innocent but only in appearance, and no-one would suspect you are the one who is attacking.
The persona and the shadow - the accepted parts of self and the rejected parts of self, are the two halves of the split mind. You keep the rejected parts in darkness because, if they were brought into the light, you would see that the mind is one, not two. And this would heal and undo the split, removing both the persona and the shadow. And it is this the persona avoids at all costs.
"Dissociation is a distorted process of thinking, whereby two systems of belief, which CANNOT coexist, are BOTH MAINTAINED. It HAS BEEN recognized that, if they were BROUGHT TOGETHER, their joint acceptance WOULD become impossible. But, if one is kept in darkness FROM THE OTHER, their SEPARATION seems to keep them both alive, and equal in their reality. Their JOINING thus becomes the source of fear, for, if they meet, acceptance MUST be withdrawn from one of them."
"The light of guiltlessness shines guilt away because, when they are BROUGHT TOGETHER, the truth of one MUST make the falsity of its OPPOSITE perfectly clear. "
"WHAT DO YOU WANT? Light or darkness, knowledge or ignorance are yours, but not both. Opposites must be brought together, and not kept apart. For their separation is only in your mind, and they are reconciled by union, as YOU are. In union, everything that is not real MUST disappear, for truth IS union. As darkness disappears in light, so ignorance fades away when knowledge dawns."
This is a potent, and clarifying passage, about the fact that ALL perception (even true) is totally OPPOSITE to reality still. Even Christ vision, even sight of the real world, is STILL a state of separation. "Perception is a separated state." "To perceive the truth is not the same as knowing it." Knowledge is a direct experience of God's Kingdom, whereas perception is a once-removed, separated, interpretative IMAGE-based reflection. Nothing in the world of illusions (including Eath) HAS any truth to it. True perception merely recognizes that the world IS SENSELESS. Teachers of God who choose to look on dreams a while, are NOT DECEIVED by what they see.
"This is a course in miracles. And, as such, the laws of healing must be understood before the purpose of the course can be accomplished. Let us review the principles that we have covered, and arrange them in a way that summarizes all that must occur for healing to be possible. For when it once is possible it MUST occur. ALL sickness comes from separation. When the separation is denied, it goes. For it IS gone as soon as the idea which brought it has been healed and been replaced by sanity. Sickness and sin are seen as consequence and cause, in a relationship kept hidden from awareness, that it may be carefully preserved from reason's light.
Guilt ASKS FOR punishment, and its request is granted. NOT in truth, but in ***the world of shadows and illusions BUILT on sin***. The Son of God perceives what he would see, because perception IS a wish fulfilled. Perception changes, MADE to take the place of changeless knowledge. ***Yet is truth unchanged. It cannot BE perceived, but only known.*** What is perceived takes many forms, but ***NONE has meaning***. ****Brought to truth, its senselessness is quite apparent.**** Kept APART from truth, it SEEMS to have a meaning and be real. ****Perception's laws are OPPOSITE to truth, and what IS true of knowledge is NOT true of ANYTHING that is apart from it.**** Yet has God given Answer to the world of sickness, Which applies to ALL its forms.
God's Answer is eternal, though It operates in time, where It is needed. But, because It IS of God, the laws of time do not affect Its workings. It is in this world, but NOT a part of it. For It is real, and dwells where all reality MUST be. Ideas leave not their source, and their effects but SEEM to be apart from them. Ideas are of the mind. What is projected OUT, and seems to be EXTERNAL to the mind, is NOT outside at all, but an effect of what is in, and has NOT left its source. God's Answer lies where the belief in sin MUST be, for only there can its effects be utterly undone, and without cause.
****Perception's laws must be reversed, because they ARE reversals of the laws of truth****. The laws of truth FOREVER will be true, and cannot BE reversed; yet can be SEEN as upside down. And this must be corrected where the illusion of reversal lies. It is impossible that one illusion be LESS amenable to truth than are the rest. But it IS possible that some are given greater VALUE, and less willingly OFFERED to truth for healing and for help. ****NO illusion has ANY truth in it.**** Yet it appears some are MORE true than others, although this clearly makes no sense at all. All that a hierarchy of illusions can show is PREFERENCE, NOT reality."
This is really key:
"Brought to truth, its senselessness is quite apparent. Kept APART from truth, it SEEMS to have a meaning and be real."
The world is an illusion. Period. Having illusions ABOUT the world, means you are believing the world is real. It means you have illusions ON TOP OF an illusion, and are not RECOGNIZING that it's an illusion.
"the world of shadows and illusions BUILT on sin" "The world of bodies is the world of sin."
Perceiving the world AS REAL, means that it has been kept APART from truth. And therefore true perception is not occurring.
Because the world IS AN ILLUSION, perceiving it AS REAL is a MISTAKE. An error. This is FALSE perception.
Because the world IS AN ILLUSION, perceiving it AS NOT REAL, is CORRECT perception, true perception. When the world is seen with true perception the world does NOT BECOME REAL. It becomes RECOGNIZED AS FALSE. Its senselessness becomes apparent. It ceases to DECEIVE because you do not buy INTO its illusions of temptation.
This world is not real. Nor is is real in the eyes of christ. Believing it is real is a complete 180 degree reversal of what the course is teaching.
"Father, there is a vision which beholds all things as sinless, so that fear has gone, and where it was is Love invited in. And Love will come wherever it is asked. This vision is Your gift. The eyes of Christ look on a world forgiven. In His sight are all its sins forgiven, for He sees no sin in anything He looks upon. Now let His true perception come to me, that I may waken from the dream of guilt and look within upon my sinlessness, which You have kept completely undefiled upon the altar to Your holy Son, the Self with Which I would identify."
Let us today behold each other in the sight of Christ. How beautiful we are! How holy and how loving! Brother, come and join with me today. We save the world when we are joined. For in our vision it becomes as holy as the Light in us.
"The miracle does nothing. All it does is to UNdo. And thus it cancels out the interference to what HAS BEEN done . It does not add, but merely takes away. And what it takes away is long since gone, but, being kept in memory, APPEARS to have immediate effects."
What has "been done" is God's will, creation, perfection, the establishing of you as an immortal being, perfect health, eternal life, happiness etc.
But what has been IMAGINED is the ego stuff which has tried to "interfere" with creation. This has produced denial and sickness and pain and suffering and death.
So what the miracle DOES, is that it UNDOES the INTERFERENCES, the ego stuff, so that all that REMAINS is the true-nature of the immortal spiritual self.
Some people interpret this to mean literally "miracles don't do anything". This is a gross error. They actually DO ACT to "cancel" or "reverse" or "dissolve" or "heal" the "strange distortions that were manifest" and wipe them away to RE-ESTABLISH the perfection and health that has been hidden by the ego's interference.
So the miracle actually UNDOES EGO, and therefore UNCOVERS perfection, by REMOVING the manifestations, symptoms, and effects of ego.
Thus they DO produce what appears to be an IMMEDIATE EFFECT. The stuff which is "being kept in memory" is the entire ego thought system, which is dissolved and undone and shone past, to ERASE IT. This produces the "appearance" of transformation even on a physical level.
If we were ALREADY in a state, in time, of perfection, miracles indeed would not DO anything. There would be nothing TO UNDO. But because we HAVE added layer upon layer of ego denial and suffering, THOSE things ARE UNDONE by the miracle, in an ACTIVE way.